Chapter 5 005.

Back in Jane's Apartment, she was still fast sleep when the blaring alarm jolted her out of bed. She woke up almost immediately and hissed out loudly, she didn't want to wake up anymore.

She went to the mirror side and stood with her arms crossed to her chest. She rubbed her temples in worry, how did her life turn out this way just in a day? She sighed inwardly as she stared at the horrible looking lass staring back at her in the mirror.

She plopped on the bed and shook her legs repeatedly, why does she have to wake up and start thinking of all these things again, she sobbed silently.

She picked her phone up and checked for missed notifications, Mayo hadn't bother to call her. She nodded her head in pity and muttered cuss words at him. "Bastard!" She yelled aggressively.

She went into the bathroom and got into the bathtub, she filled it with water. She unwrapped the towel tied to her chest and gently, she stepped inside and sat in.

After she was done bathing, she wore a pair of white jean and green oversized tee shirt, she slid her slippers into her feet and stepped out of the house.

Life has to move on.

Been a whole month after that night, neither of them have seen or heard from each other. Jane heard that Mayo packed out of the apartment she rented for him and didn't even bother to ask where he moved to.

She was getting over him and living her life once again.

Even when she tried to stay mad at Desmond, she would remember what the priest told her when she went to him for confession.

After she narrated everything that happened to him, he had looked into her gleaming eyes and said gently, "You have to forgive everyone who offends you because even God, the father forgives us our sins whenever we err." She had stared away from him and disagreed, she was never going to forgive the man that took her pride away from her without her consent.

"Father, it's not easy to let go. It's hard, very hard to forgive him. He raped me!" She had emphasized.

"You were drunk sister Jane." He had looked deeply into her eyes once again. "You shouldn't have gotten drunk in the first place, if you were sad, you could have prayed for God to soothe you. Going to a tavern and getting yourself drunk wasn't the best solution and look what it caused you now." Father Humphrey had said. "I'm not trying to vindicate you, I'm just urging you to ask for the forgiveness of your sins and forgive others who had offended you too." Ben surrendered to him, he had prayed for her and again, she felt peaceful.

One month after the horrible experience she hated remembering, she had learn a lot that shaped her within that short space of time - having to live with grudges wasn't a part of life that was healthy, not being able to forgive makes one become a sinner herself and holding unto the past won't let you move forward.

She had learnt great lesson and she was done holding unto things that made that broke her heart, she wanted to be happy and live again. Even though, she had tried to but it was still difficult for her to live, for her to stop the memories from lingering, her house still smelt of Mayo and whenever she remembered him, everything that happened came rushing out like water from the tap.

As she sat on the sofa and meditate, she looked for ways to stop him from recurring on her mind. Then an idea suddenly crossed her mind. To pack out of the house. She placed her hand on her chin and thought about it carefully, packing out of the house would mean a whole lot of things to her but the best of it all is that she'd forget all about Mayo and the memories of them in her house. "Perfect!" She snapped at the idea, she smiled heartily and picked her phone up to look for rentable houses in one of the decent estates in Lagos.

Desmond hadn't resumed back to work, his friends were really worried about him and they tried talking him into resuming his work but he refused bluntly and told them he needed time to sort himself out.

"How can a stranger have that much effect on him, is it because she's a virgin?" Eddy asked. He had never seen his friend that worried about a woman before.

"I don't know Eddy, I just need time to sort myself out. I'm in a deep mess and getting out of it is all I wish for at the moment." Desmond replied.

"Are you dumb?" Eddy asked.

Desmond looked at him with a scowl on his face.

"For crying out loud, you don't know this woman and you're killing yourself over her. It's been a month now and you're not still back to your life! Do you even know what she's out there doing? Do you know if she cares about you or...?" Eddy stuttered. "I understand we all make mistakes but you have to forget about the past, move on, live your life! Live your damn life Desmond!" Eddy yelled.

"How can I live my damn life when I've hurt someone who's not willing to forgive me? Just how can I live when my heart is heavy? How exactly do you want me to live when I feel so terrible inside of me?" He looked at Eddy with so much fierceness in his eyes.

"What exactly is wrong with you, why are you getting worked up just because of a woman?" Eddy asked angrily.

"A woman I deflowered unknowingly, an innocent woman I took her pride away from her without her consent." He said with a shaky voice, his eyes forming into tears. "I wish I didn't do it, I feel so bad."

"Desmond, you have to calm down okay?" Chris finally chirped into the conversation. "I understand how you feel but you have to let go and live your life again. You don't even know who she is, you can't find her, you don't know a thing about her."

"And that's exactly why it hurts badly," He retorted. "If I could find her, I'd just beg for her forgiveness. That's the only thing I need to heal me right now, I need her to understand I didn't rape her, I need her to understand it wasn't intentional and I just want her forgiveness." He told his friends.

"I have a feeling she's moved on and you're just here getting yourself worked up over nothing." Eddy hissed. "Thought you were stronger than this." He mocked Desmond.

"Common Eddy, don't be stupid!" Chris cautioned. Eddy respected Chris and muted his lips for a while.

"Guys, I need to be left alone." He told them.

"Sure, but that's after you eat and promise us you'll resume back to work next week." Chris said.

"Chris, I took a break from work for a reason, I'm not emotionally ready to work and besides, the company was planning to give me a six months break before the whole thing happened. So, I thought now is the best time to take a break off work." He was facing Chris now.

"Why the six months break?" Eddy asked.

"Its for a course." Chris explained, he remembered Desmond once told him about the course he wanted to go and study abroad for four months. "Just get yourself together before leaving, be back to the Desmond we used to know." Chris said.

"OK, Desmond I didn't mean to sound harsh but I just need my buddy back. I want you to man up and be the guy that we always look up to as a role model." Eddy told him.

"You mean role model in womanizing?" Desmond asked sarcastically.

"That's the only aspect you're good at." Eddy replied and the trio burst into laughter. "It breaks my heart to see you like this just because of a lass you smashed." He winked at him.

"Stop that Eddy." He warned him.

"Okay, should I prepare noodles for you?" Eddy asked.

"Can you do better?" Desmond smiled.

"Chris can do better." Eddy replied and they all laughed. "Be good, guy." He patted his shoulders and rushed to get him some food from the kitchen.

Desmond smiled, been a while he felt that way.