Chapter 3 Half-Meant Promises

◇ ◇ Author's Notes ◇ ◇

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

COPYRIGHT © 2020 by MXian

Unauthorized reproduction of any part of this story or plagiarism of any kind is prohibited by the law.

Scenes, characters, dialogues, places, and events in this story are all invented or are used fictitiously. This story contains mature themes, profanity, some violence, and graphic sexual content not intended for young readers.

The first part takes place right after the last chapter of the first book "The Heir's Secrets [Mafia Games XI]". Italian-English dialogue translations are written in brackets [ ].

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Chapter 1: Half-Meant Promises

◇ KEL ◇

◇ Brichese, Italy ◇

I only meant to give him a quick goodbye kiss. For old times' sake. I didn't want to say goodbye to him yet. But I had to leave Italy now and go back to my life in New York.

But when he kissed me back, I couldn't really deny my feelings anymore. Miles kept kissing me till I had to convince him to go back inside his car. I could feel Alessio and the other bodyguards watching us, and, frankly, their presence still bothered me.

They were just doing their jobs, though. Keeping an eye on us-it's what they're being paid to do. Nothing creepy about it. Their sworn duty was to stay close in case any unexpected company approached Miles or his car. Now that Miles and I were alone in the backseat, I put my arms around him and tried to enjoy our fleeting privacy before I had to leave him again.

It wasn't the first time we kissed, but his unusually sweet behavior tonight definitely caught me off-guard. Albeit we weren't talking much during the drive to the airport with him behind the wheel, I didn't imagine it would lead to this. The tension was palpable, but I didn't quite expect that it would be this sexual. Or that he wanted to be intimate with me again.

Did I want his affection? Sure. I loved being this close to him. It was perplexing and reassuring-frustratingly in equal measure. I'd always thought I wasn't the romantic or sensual type, and back when we were living together in his house, I never imagined I'd fall head over heels for a guy like him.

But...it happened.

Maybe he felt the same. Or maybe it's just me. Maybe I was just too aroused by our physical intimacy now that I just didn't care for anything else. I kissed the side of his face while my fingers clasped his soft hair, with his arms stiffening around my waist and hips.

"You smell so good," he murmured, hugging me to his warm body with my thighs pressed onto his lap. I was practically straddling him in the backseat, but we were still fully clothed. He did unbutton my top, though, just so he could gain full access to my neck.

There was a tingling sensation right underneath the spot where his mouth was, his teeth slightly grazing my skin. He liked being rough sometimes but I didn't mind. If this was him being careful, I'd tell him to kiss me anywhere and anytime he wanted. Only because I would be away from him for a while. Again.

We led very different lives now. I wouldn't blame him if he thought this might be the last time we'd get to be this intimate. That it might be a long while before we get to see each other again.

A few months? A year? Two? I just didn't know for sure.

"Babe..." I almost flinched when he gripped my hair away from my shoulders to gently bite my neck and the skin on my jaw.

Miles didn't say anything and only replied with a throaty moan. It sounded like a grunt of annoyance, as if he couldn't be bothered to pause what he was doing to me. He hugged me closer to his chest with his firm arm pressed onto my hips, trapping me on his lap.

The back of my thighs rubbed against the fabric of his jeans while my knees were pressing hard against the backseat cushion, causing some unpleasant sensation. But I didn't complain.

Perhaps he thought sleeping with me would somehow relieve him of his mental and physical anguish. But should I feel bad about it? That he didn't want anything beyond sex?

No. I shouldn't feel sorry for myself. In fact I should feel better that he was reaching out to me this time and no longer pushing me away. He was seeking my help and attention, allowing himself to be vulnerable around me. Unlike before. It meant he was learning to trust me more now.

"Sorry," Miles muttered after a noiseless minute. "What were you saying?" He licked my sensitive skin as he waited for me to answer.

"Nothing," I murmured as I kept my eyes closed. I was concentrating on the softness and comforting warmth of his tongue on my neck.

He was kissing me again, soothing the slightly painful bites he made on my skin. I couldn't explain the pleasure I felt from his sweet, gentle kisses after letting him have his way. I'd never felt anything like it before.

When he pulled away to look me in the eye, I thought he was going to kiss me on the lips. But he didn't. Instead he just gave me a quick smooch on my cheek and hugged me tight for a moment. Then he carefully pushed me off of his lap.

Somewhat disappointed, I sat beside him in the backseat, alone with him in the dimness. Maybe he changed his mind? I wished otherwise. Or perhaps he thought...I just needed a little foreplay before he used me to get what he wanted.

Wait. Why was I making a big deal out of it? It could just be a fleeting pang of jealousy. Yeah. Just plain old envy. I knew for a fact he'd been sleeping with other people. Apparently he just didn't want to do the same with me.

It hurt to think so, but maybe I ought to push my ego out of the equation. He just didn't see me that way, and part of me knew I should just be okay with it-obviously he didn't want a romantic relationship with me.

The jealousy still felt like a solid punch in the gut, though. Try as I might, I couldn't help but imagine Miles being intimate with other people. Why not with me? Did it disgust him or something?

When he let out a sigh beside me, I glanced at him and watched him massage his forehead.

Did I ruin it for him now? I swore inwardly. "Sorry."

"No." Miles turned to stare at me despite the dimness. Thankfully, the lampposts around the airport parking lot kept the area from being pitch-dark. "Don't apologize." He frowned.

Okay. So he didn't want me to say sorry. But what bothered him now? "What's up?" I buttoned up my blouse and watched his reticence. It was like we're back to him being uncommunicative. It's downright annoying sometimes.

"I just don't wanna have sex with you in a car." He shook his head weakly, as if annoyed by the mere thought. He chuckled and looked away. "Sorry. You deserve better."

I pulled a face at his explanation. I didn't really ask for him to explain or apologize, but I appreciated his straightforwardness all the same. "You feel better now?" I muttered while I tucked a clump of his hair behind his ear. "No more pain in your stomach area?"

"No." Miles kept staring out the window, his voice muted and full of regret. Or maybe self-loathing. He could be having negative thoughts about himself again because of what he just did to me.

He liked to play it rough, but I honestly didn't mind. "Hey." I sat still beside him for a moment, waiting for him to say more.

A long, pensive silence later, he still wouldn't look at me. Why? What did he really want to say? That we shouldn't be intimate because I "deserve better"? Did he think I would push or expect him to do more?

"Just tell me if something hurts again," I said in a hushed voice, deliberately changing the subject.

"I'll miss you."

I frowned. Why was he telling me this again? I leaned closer to him and touched his cheek.

After a moment of me just coaxing him, he eventually turned to face me. He stared into my eyes.

I felt a sudden pinch in my chest. I could feel his sadness just by looking at him, and the instant guilt trip made me feel like crap again. I didn't want to leave him this soon, but we both knew I had to. "You can come see me in New York anytime. Just text me or...give me a quick call."

"Just focus on school." Miles leaned in to kiss me on the lips.

It was just a quick, gentle kiss, but I loved the gesture as I could feel more sincerity from him this time. It made me want to kiss him back, but my guilt was eating up my courage again. "I'll come see you soon. After exams. Okay?" I stroked the back of his hand that was palming my thigh.

"You don't have to." Miles glanced away and faked a quiet laugh. "I'll be busy, anyway." He sighed out loud. "Just stay in New York. Keep your grades up."

Okay. Fine. He was telling me to live a quiet life in New York and finish my studies. He wanted me to focus on my goals. Build up my career in the medical field. His work would also keep him too busy to have time for me and our relationship-if it could even be called a relationship.

It was a tad disappointing, but I had to understand that he only wanted the best for me, and he was only making sure I kept my priorities straight. "I'll call you," he murmured while his hand gripped mine on my thigh.

Our fingers stayed interlaced for a lengthy, comfortable moment of silence. I nodded faintly at his promise, knowing well he was only trying to alleviate the emotional struggle I was dealing with. "Just...don't do anything brash without talking to Ricchar or...your parents."

"Yeah. Okay," Miles sighed. He sounded unsure.

"What's your next plan?" I watched him stare at the back of the driver's seat, noticing the way his brows and forehead furrowed. What was he thinking of? Was he still upset by what happened to me in San Pietro? Maybe he was still blaming Enzo for everything, as much as I was to blame.

"I'll just..." Miles rubbed his nape and stared at our entwined hands on my lap. "I'll talk to Charr about...what to do next."

"About what?" I mumbled, curious and eager to hear more.

"I dunno yet. But I'll try to clean up Pappa's mess. Maybe convince him to stop working with the mobs." He scoffed and slightly shook his head. "Highly doubt he'll listen to me, but, gotta try at least."

"Okay." I knelt on the leather-covered seat to give him a hug. I kissed his cheek and felt some relief when he hugged me back. "Just be careful. Please."

"Yeah. You too," Miles murmured to me. Then he gave me a quick kiss on the corner of my lips. "See you soon."

"Cut back on the pills, and drugs. It's damaging your liver and kidneys more."

"I'll try." He pulled away and pinched my chin, our noses touching. After we exchanged awkward smiles, he looked out the window and sighed out loud. "Go. The plane just arrived."

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