Chapter 8 So You Don't Disappear

SELENE

There are questions you prepare for, and then there are the ones that steal your breath.

"Is that what you're curious about?" I asked, forcing my voice to remain light.

"Yes." Sebastian nodded, his eyes never leaving my face, waiting patiently, expectantly for an answer.

He wasn't joking. That much was clear. The seriousness in his gaze made my chest tighten.

"Well..." I began, choosing my words carefully. "We both agreed not to rush things. Raising children isn't something you decide on in a day." It was the most believable excuse I could summon.

He fell silent, turning the thought over in his mind. Each second stretched, my nerves coiling tighter. I watched his face, searching for any sign that he didn't believe me.

Then he nodded. "That makes sense."

Only then did I realize I'd been holding my breath. I let it out slowly.

"Still," he added, a faint smile touching his lips, "it would be nice to have children around."

I squinted at him. I'd never imagined Sebastian as someone who liked children. Apparently, there were many things about him I'd never known, or never been allowed to see.

"Should we head back to your room?" I asked quickly, steering the conversation away before it could dig any deeper.

"Already sending me to bed?" He teased, pushing himself up from the bench as he glanced at me. "You're surprisingly bossy for someone who looks this gentle."

My eyes widened. "When have I ever been bossy?"

He arched a brow. "Saying we should head back to my room right after I bring up kids sounds a lot like you shutting down the conversation."

I snorted. "I offered it as a suggestion, not a command."

"And you also stole my phone," he added lightly, folding his arms. "While blaming it on the doctor."

"That- that was..." I faltered, scrambling for an excuse that refused to come.

He smiled, clearly amused. "Exactly. No excuse."

I looked away, my lips twitching despite myself. "Let's just go back to your room."

He chuckled, nodding easily. "Okay. Lead the way."

Then, softer, almost absentmindedly, he went on. "I feel better when you're around anyway."

The words struck straight through my chest. Not because of what he said, but because of how he said it. Like it had always been true. Like I had always been his comfort.

I stood and started forward, but before I could take a step, his hand closed around mine.

I stiffened, then looked up at him.

"So you don't disappear again." He murmured, threading his fingers through mine.

I'd lost count of how many times my heart had fluttered today. At this rate, I might develop a heart condition just trying to keep up with it.

Was it wrong to admit that I loved the feel of his hand in mine? The way his thumb brushed softly over my skin. Was this what I had been missing all along?

Maybe... just maybe... I owed amnesia a quiet thank-you for this moment.

Just before we reached the next block leading to his ward, my phone buzzed in my pocket. I paused, fished it out, and sighed when I saw the caller ID.

Ashley.

I answered while Sebastian watched me with quiet curiosity.

"Give me a second, we're almost there." I murmured into the phone, then ended the call.

"My assistant is here." I explained when his gaze lingered on me.

We turned the corner and found Ashley standing outside his ward, two takeaway boxes balanced carefully in her hands. She brightened the moment she spotted us.

"Hope I didn't keep you waiting?" I asked, gently slipping my hand free from Sebastian's as I walked toward her.

"No, I just arrived." She assured me, her eyes flicking briefly to him before returning to me.

I glanced back at Sebastian. "Can you wait inside for me?"

He nodded and stepped into the ward without question.

The moment he was gone, Ashley studied my face. "Are you okay?" She asked softly, passing the boxes to me.

I accepted them with a quiet sigh. "I don't know."

Ashley had been my classmate before she became my assistant, my constant, my safe place. She knew the history of my life, the parts I rarely let anyone see. But she didn't know about the divorce I had been planning. She didn't know about the amnesia either.

"You two look... close." She observed carefully, exactly as I'd expected.

I offered a small, guarded smile. "A lot happened."

She looped her arm through mine. "You'll tell me everything."

"I will." I promised gently. "Just not now."

She pressed her lips together, resigned. "Alright. Later." Then she exhaled. "Work's been hectic without you."

"I heard you've been doing great holding things together." I told her.

Her brow lifted. "Who told you that? They lied."

I laughed despite myself.

"Well," she said, stepping back, "take care of yourself."

"You too." I replied.

She waved as she walked away, and I watched her go, grateful for her presence, and dreading the explanations that would come later.

With the takeaway boxes clutched in my hands, I made my way back to Sebastian's ward. He was standing by the window when I stepped in, his attention fixed on the view outside, as though he was lost in thought.

He turned the moment he sensed me. "Are you done talking to your assistant?"

"Yeah." I murmured, setting the boxes down on the small table. "You must be hungry."

"Not really." His reply was flat, almost distracted. Then his gaze flicked to me. "Are you hungry?"

"Well..." I scratched the back of my neck, suddenly unsure of myself. "I haven't really eaten anything today."

"Then you should eat." He finally left the window and crossed the room. "I'll just take a bite." He added lightly, lowering himself onto the couch.

I let out a small laugh and sat beside him, lifting the lids off the takeaway boxes.

Inside the takeaway boxes were portions of pasta coated in a rich tomato sauce, slices of grilled chicken resting neatly on top. The warmth seeped through the containers, carrying a comforting aroma that made my stomach twist.

"Do you prefer pasta with cream sauce or tomato sauce?" I asked. We'd never really eaten together before, never shared something as simple as a meal, so I had no idea what he liked or didn't.

"I think I prefer tomato sauce."

I let out a small sigh of relief. "Me too."

I handed him a fork from the box, and we began eating in a quiet, companionable silence.

"This is really tasty." He said, taking another bite. Then another.

I'd thought he said he would only have a bite. Not that I minded, but the thought made a laugh slip out before I could stop it.

He turned toward me, curiosity flickering in his eyes. "Why are you laughing?"

"You said you'd just take a bite." I murmured, keeping my eyes on my food. "You've taken more than six."

He snorted, wrinkling his nose at me. "It's not my fault the food tastes good." He dropped his fork and straightened slightly.

"Oh-no, I didn't mean for you to stop." I said quickly, panic fluttering in my chest. "You can keep eating."

But his attention had already shifted.

"I'm more curious about why you're barely eating." He said, his gaze steady on me.

I tightened my grip on the fork, as though it might anchor me. There was something about the way those honey-colored eyes looked at me that made my breath catch.

"I..." I swallowed. "I don't really have the appetite."

"But you said you were hungry."

"I know." I said softly, feeling a knot of nerves in my chest. How could I explain that sitting this close to him, sharing a meal like this, made my heart race and my stomach flutter all at once? "I'm hungry, but I don't have the appetite to eat. Does that make sense?"

A smoky glint passed through his eyes, sending warmth rushing to my cheeks.

"No." He said simply.

Yet he didn't look away.

I let out a breathless laugh, the hairs at the back of my neck prickling. "I figured it wouldn't."

Then he spoke again, his voice low and unexpected.

"Would you have an appetite if I feed you?"