Chapter 4 No.4

Robert

Margaret my wife, she was the sweetest person I ever had in my life. I fell in love with her at my first sight but woefully it was the toughest struggle to have her in my life. She was a simple girl, very beautiful, hailing from a decent family and I on the contrary was the wretch of the dark world, the only son of the mob leader John Evans, who was brought up in the midst of knives and countless murders. Nothing was similar between her and me yet I couldn't help myself but to fall for her, a sweet and simple middle class girl who had the best smile in the world.

My family, my friends and every person from our gang cautioned me to stay away from her but my heart wouldn't simply listen. I knew she was like a candle that would bring brightness in a person's life but I am a Badger who needs to stay in the dark to hunt for its prey. Both of us could never be one we are people from two different poles who can never ever stay together. Still knowing everything I swept her out of her feet, took away every inch of her innocence and made her mine forever.

I remember the first time that I saw her. She was sitting in the college cafeteria with some of her friends. A girl beside her spoke to her something in the ear and her pink lips curl into the most enigmatic smile that I ever saw. My heart went crazy. An immediate feeling to haul her and make her mine evoked inside me like a gravitational pull. She looked around with her sparkling icy blues that shined like stars in the dark sky. Her eyes stationed on someone standing on the other side of the hall. Pulling on her long slender legs she walked forward like an alluring femme fatale. "Hey Xavier, it's been so long since we have met each other." She went and hugged the man who was talking to someone.

His eyes caught hers and his hands immediately moved around her back returning her embrace. Jealousy strikes me all of a sudden. She was mine and mine only to touch and have. She took hold of his hand and dragged him between her groups of friends to introduce him. I couldn't turn away my gaze but to look at the walking beauty in front of me. Her long chestnut hair swayed along her sides in wavy curls by the chilled breeze blowing inside the open hall of the cafeteria on the mid November evening.

I hid the truth from her and married her eloping from both our families. She was the light of my life attracting me towards her like a moth. Two years after our successful romantic marriage we had a beautiful baby daughter. She looked just like me but had the eyes and hair of her mother. For a few more months I could continue my charade with my wife but ultimately she came to know the truth.

There were fights initially often times leaving her cold and unloving towards me and ultimately she ended our marriage. I pleaded her for years and made endless phone calls to let me into her life. I told her not to deprive our baby of a fatherly care but she couldn't welcome the request though we didn't divorce each other. She felt the life of our baby was unsafe with me as one of her parent. I couldn't convince her anymore and left her but always prayed God to keep her and our baby sheltered.

The light of my life was gone forever. From that day forward I did meaningless relationships and abused sex. I became a man whore. I was always drunk and did drugs ruining my body and mind. My parents tried to amend me but couldn't reap a good result.

Though everything changed inside me there was one thing that I would never forget. Every year I bought gifts for my daughter on her birthday. Some were flaunting wealth while others were purchased just keeping in mind of her growing necessities. I promised my wife that I would never re-enter their lives until the day she desired of it. The gifts would reach my daughter through some of my wife's employers or some mutual friends. Sometimes I bought gifts just like that leaving them at their doorstep.

I saw to it that my wife and daughter were never deprived of a roof over their heads. I took care of Margaret's growing medical bills. She was a woman of lot of self pride. She would not allow me to spend too much money on them. She wanted to take care of Angelica totally on her own but became unsuccessful in the end. When the water reached above their heads I had to force myself into their lives. I was always there for my family like a shadow watching them from behind so that they do not break and fall apart.

Present

Today my daughter will be reaching our home. I am very enthusiastic about her arrival. It is the place where I and Margaret built beautiful dreams, cherished and nurtured. The happiness that I presently hold cannot be described in words. It is like a child getting his favourite ice-cream for the first time in his life. I do not know much about my princess's tastes and fashion but from the little I heard from Margaret, I made every necessary preparation for her entrance into our home.

I got her bedroom designed in her favourite princess theme. I know she is a huge fan of Barbie. I loaded her closet with dresses I personally bought according to latest trend and fashion. Of course I will never buy her outfits which are revealing. I had already loaded my TV shelf with princess movies. I informed my chefs of her favoured cuisine and gave them a list of her best loved dishes.

I could not sleep peacefully yesterday night always attentive of any sound from her room. I was anxious about her health. She was perspiring in the flight yesterday. I did not know she had a phobia towards flights. Margaret never informed me about it. Probably she never knew as they never travelled by a flight. I wanted to hold my daughter to my chest and let her sleep in my arms so that she doesn't have any bad dreams. I wanted to make her feel secured in my embrace but our relationship was unfortunately not in the best terms.

I sent the maid to her room with a yellow sundress which I handpicked a few days back for her casual wear. The dress caught my sight at the first glance itself exhibited in the display box and I knew it was made for my beautiful daughter. I am now eagerly waiting for her at the dining table yearning to ask if she had a good night's sleep and see her in the dress I loved the most.

Will Robert be able to win the heart of his daughter?