mission to love

Katy's Point of View.

Something about the way he said the words had me frightened as it had me excited. Carson Cooper? Carson Cooper! Everyone in this room knew what that man was capable of. A dangerous arms dealer and for some reason, they thought I could take this under my belt. Maybe I wasn't going unnoticed after all.

A throat clearing came from the other corner of the room. Johnson smiled small as he'd seen that he had in fact brought attention to himself.

"Okay. You might think this is me being stereotypical, but... Boss, you can't possibly be serious about her." He said. If I could guess correctly, which I always did, I would say he was trying so hard to swallow the shock that I was chosen instead of him. It annoyed him. The more he tried to hide under the painful smile betrayed him. So did his grip on his own. It was cracked. "Katy is... Fast. She is great, if not the best. But for someone as dangerous as Carson Cooper, we are going to need someone who could fight their way out of trouble. What if he recognizes that she's a fake and decides to kill her-" I couldn't take any more of his excuses. I thought I was alone, but apparently, Jamie, the office hound was going through the same pain of boredom Johnson freely offered.

"It's an undercover job, Johnson. Do you really think our respective genders would make things a little bit more out of reality?"

He frowned. "What reality?"

"That he could catch either of us at any time. It does not really matter what skills she has. The most important thing needed here is briefness, which can of course be amplified by the office's offer to help."

He took a rather frustrated gulp from his cup. "With all due respect, Katherine, I have been on this job longer. I know how guys like Carson Cooper think."

I shrugged. This time it was me trying to remain calm. I would not lose my temper. Not today. Not in front of the supervisors. I had been bustling for the past few months to get noticed, to get into good graces. Now that I was, I wasn't going to let Johnson take that away from me. It was a miracle that someone with an ill temper like me successfully retained a spying job for the FBI. I was not going to mess up that in Johnson's favor.

"You might have been here longer but we all know I've had better results." Mocking whistling and whispers filled the air. Johnson was infuriated. Before he could utter a comeback, Micah stood. And since he was the boss, his standing meant no talking. At least not until he was done talking.

"This is a big case. We have been trying for years to pin this man down and now that we might actually have a lead, I think the both of you should be figuring out how to get your expertise to good use instead of saying crazy things to each other on a meeting table. You're spies, not nine-year-olds."

Johnson backed into his seat. I, on the other hand, tried to hide my smile with a friend that might convince them that I was serious about this job. I wanted this particular case. Maybe this would help me finally get into the computer room and out of the fields. Maybe it would finally bring about that satisfaction. Maybe...

"Mayers?" Micah's voice rang into my ear, making me jump. Why did he have to sound so concrete sometimes?

"Huh?" I finally asked when it was obvious he was not going to repeat the previous question. All eyes was on me again. Urgh!

"I asked if you could handle this for real?" He squinted, leaning closer.

I nodded so hard, that I could probably be mistaken for an agama at that moment. "Yes!" I slowed myself down. I didn't want to appear too desperate. "Yes. I know it's hard-"

"Oh, you have no idea how hard this is going to be," Johnson muttered. I would vote to ask him to go get coffee for everyone. He needed to walk off the bitterness.

"It's going to be hard, yes, but as you liked to tell us during training, it's only hard if you think you can't do it."

Micah smiled. So did Mrs Smith. They had both been the ones who had drilled me, on the name of training a few years back.

"I like how you're going about this, Mayers. I like how you're choosing to approach it but you must know that this is not like the other jobs we've had you on. What we're talking about here is crazy. Bullets... Threats... Um, bad news. This man is terrifying. We have been on him for years and for some reason, we can't just get him. We can't catch him. He's fast. He thinks fast. He acts fast. He's dangerous and in a fast way."

I nodded slowly. Reading from the files they had given me about this mystery man. Or if I could get creative, I would say he was my promotion plan. "It does say here that he offers charities to the department." I had no idea what had given me the boldness to say that, but if I was going to be risking my life, if I was going to be setting my foot as bait for the lion, I might as well know some things. I knew they would not tell me everything, but I needed some things at least and this statement made Mrs Smith really uncomfortable. Perhaps it was not best for me to say everything just yet. "I meant to ask if that is why he's not been caught. Because perhaps he had gotten very comfortable with us?"

I could see her exhale at that. What was she hiding?

"Perhaps, but you don't really know these things. Anyone can donate. My advice as someone who's gone before you, is don't let your guard down. Don't let his smile cloud your senses. Don't let him come close to you."

"Well, I doubt that could ever happen. I don't watch romantic movies for a reason." I said and everyone chuckled. Everyone but Mrs Smith.

"It's more serious than you think. This is our first time sending in a Fed. Representative. For all we know, he might even be aware and be waiting for you right now."

I swallowed, not ready to show the fear her words had suddenly sent into my belly. "I can handle myself."

She stared at me for a while, as though trying to get me to tell her something with my eyes. When I didn't, she nodded and reached for the remote that controlled the slideshow.

A picture of a small boy appeared on the screen as the lights dimmed.

"Born to an Irish mother and an American father. Moved to the U S when he was just five years old, got bullied a lot." The picture changed to an older version of the previous person. Perhaps three years older. "His mother died giving birth to his younger sister. No one really knows her name, they call her Carmen." The picture changed to a family picture, with what was now obviously a young Carson holding his younger sister's hand with their tall father towering over them.

"Carmen? What if it's her real name?"

"What makes you think it is?"

"Well, for one there's a haphazardly knitted 'C' on the collar of her dress." Mrs Smith zoomed in, then sighed softly, staring at me.

"Maybe I'm worried about nothing. Maybe you are ready for something as big as this."

I smiled at her. "That's what I'm trying to tell you." I rubbed my palms together. "Anyway, is this how he looks now? Because if it is then he needs an up-to-date photographer. Something about the lighting of this one feels like it was taken in the nineties."

Mrs Smith rolled her eyes and punched the remote. I couldn't quite take my eyes off the photo that popped up next. Wait...

"I thought he was blonde during childhood?"

"He obviously dyed his hair," Johnson muttered again. Hands akimbo, face crumpled, heart bitter.

"Correct, Johnson."

I stared back at the big screen. There was something about his features that had me. I wasn't one to crush on a picture, but there was something about this one... And for the first time since I had learned about this operation I wondered if I should go for this job. Perhaps Johnson was right. Perhaps it wasn't so smart for me to go blonde and start pretending to be his housekeeper. Maybe that would ugly... But I still had to try.

When I realized that I had stared too much, I quickly averted my gaze back to Micah's determined ones. "So when do I start?"

"Right away, Mayers, right away. He already expects a housekeeper. One Josie Philips."

"Copy that, sir."

Katy's Point of View.

"You can't really tell me that you're still sulking over everything that happened. You know this operation could end with me dead, right? You still want this round?"

Jackson sighed as we made our way to the airport. He wouldn't even stare into the rearview mirror. At this point, staring at my face annoyed him.

"If you know that you might not return, then why are you still choosing to pursue this?" His question stung. Now it was my turn to look away.

"You would take this if you were in my shoes."

He gave a dry laugh. "Oh, so now you're trying to guilt trip me, huh? I see you're tired of being nonchalant."

"I'm just doing my job. Trust me when I say it has nothing to do with the unnecessary feud we've both been allowing to go on between us for the past five years."

"Yeah, right." The way he said that made it quite obvious it was nothing but a bluff to him.

"Look, if you're going to be my backup, we need to squash whatever this is, at least for now."

"I kind of have no other option, so yeah. I agree. And kindly personally tell Mrs Smith I am not a fan of her games. She knew we were at odds and somehow I find myself driving you to the airport like we're buddies or I'm your boyfriend, whatever it is, I'm not a fan."

"Well, first of all, you might want to pass on the message yourself. After all, you've always been known as the gutsy one and secondly, you might want to smile. Trust me when I say I do not like sitting in this van with you either, it's just something that happens. Enemies get paired sometimes."

He finally looked into the mirror with an expression, I immediately knew what his little mind was thinking. "It seems you've been doing a lot of contemporary romance reading."

"Boy please, don't let your head wander. I meant exactly the opposite of what you are thinking."

He thought this for a second, a smirk clinging to his lips. "Ah, if you say so. But I know what I heard."

I thought I was frustrated to my limit already. Maybe I wasn't. "Okay, I would really appreciate it if you just kept quiet. I would kill for a quiet ride at this point, alright? Alright."

He didn't say any other thing, but that irritating smile remained. I knew he was just doing that to earn my annoyance and boy, was it working. When we got to the airport and I collected my luggage, his words weren't exactly kind but they weren't harsh either when he asked me to be careful out there.

"Thank you," I said. Maybe this moment could mark our friendship to its beginning, right?

"Yeah, whatever." He said and put the car back in gear. Definitely not going to be friends. Never.

I knew what I had in my heart and the further I walked into the checkpoint, my heart thudded into my ears. My stomach grumbled loudly and the headache I had been fighting for a while ached. Watching TV shows all these years, we always screamed our faces out to the television when something was about to go wrong. At this point, I was back at that place.

I felt like screaming because, for some reason, I couldn't point out, it seemed like something was going to go wrong anyway and no amount of intense training to train me for everything this job required, would shake that.

***

According to Mrs Smith, it was all set up. I was going to land in Washington DC and someone would be waiting. Yet, here I was, sitting sitting in the waiting room and nibbling on a half-done burger. Great! Job hadn't even begun yet and I was already having bad experiences. Just as I was about to get up and take a stroll, a stern-looking man walked into the halls with a cardboard over his head;

: JOSIE PHILLIPS.

"Finally," I muttered, raising my hands over my head and waving. He walked in my direction.

"I'm sorry that I did not get here at the scheduled time, I was kind of in a pickle. The pick-up truck developed a flat tire, it was not expected. Sorry." He said, grabbing my bag.

I didn't want to begin being a kill buzz.

"Oh, it's okay. Besides, I'm hungry. Very starved at that."

He smiled small. "Hmm, good for you. Cook was in the middle of preparing something wonderful." I liked the way he said it, it was music to my ears. We both started making our way to his car. "Okay, see the thing is we don't really say we're hungry in front of the boss. He doesn't quite like to hear it."

Ridiculous, still I tried my best to keep my brows down and my lips... 'unpursed'. Deciding to ask the more important question, "Huh, so what do we say?"

"We wink at each other."

I laughed at that. When he didn't join in... Oh, he was actually serious... This man had to be a beast to ban such a natural statement like that. "Wait, you're serious."

He nodded. "Mm-hmm, cook requested that I tell you as soon as I get here. Thank God you brought it up."

"Well, what if I say I'm hungry without seeking to be disrespectful, what then? He'll have my head in his soup?"

"Perhaps." He shrugged. He must have seen the look of terror on my face because he went on to shake his head. "No, no. I didn't mean it like that. I meant... Just don't try to do it. It does not really end well to go against what he has commanded."

"Ah, but he hasn't really told me anything... So, I'm still kind of excused even when it comes to that aspect."

"Yes, but you do get to have a small talk with him. That's where he tells you everything. You can't escape it. Sorry."

"Great."

By the time we were home, I was exhausted. The plane ride didn't quite do the number on me like the bumpy ride back home did. My toes felt like rubber as I walked out of the car. The house was on a lonely ground. We'd only passed two to three houses for a mile before getting here. Either this man really preferred his privacy, or the man was a stone-cold killer with a small sense of responsibility. It definitely wasn't the first option.

"You didn't tell me I was going to be on another plane ride," I said, stretching as I walked. He chuckled.

"Okay, you didn't tell me you were a comedian."

I smiled. He wasn't the only person who had said that. "Well, I try to be. I'm not exactly Charles Benton, now am I?"

"No, you're not."

I scanned the environment. The trees were tall and the birds that was as audible as an opera singer. The water that surrounded the house calmed the fear that I felt creeping into my heart. This place was isolated. Perhaps too isolated. Somehow this discovery suddenly seemed more stern than the numerous exclamation marks the chief gave me. That is after Mrs Smith had done her own talking.

"Wait, so how do you get groceries down here?"

"There's a private jet."

"Ha ha, very funny."

He kept a straight face. "Well, thanks but I wasn't really looking to be."

"No way."

"Yes, way."

"Well, if there's a private jet, why wasn't I just picked up from the airport? You could have saved yourself a whole lot of stress there."

"I'm his bodyguard and I've never been on that jet before. It's so much more than just a ride."

"Ah, how very... Kind of him." I said and he chuckled, reminding me. "You know, I didn't really get your name. What was it again?"

"Morris, sorry I kinda forgot to tell you before. And I forgot to ask yours, I mean I know, but for manner's sake... Um... What is your name?"

He was cute. "Josie Philips."

He smiled. "Nice to meet you, Josie."

"The pleasure is certainly mine, Morris." I had questions and since Morris was being kind, which was completely opposite of his leather jacket. "I have a question for you, it might sound crazy being that I have a job to get onto and all that but-"

"Just ask your question."

"Hmm, well, what do housekeepers do here basically, and this cook, well... Is it a she or a he?"

He opened his mouth to speak, but never did. Someone else was speaking.

"Well, you basically keep the house. And cook's a lady." His eyes... His eyes were the most beautiful shade of blue, but I knew that if I didn't stop staring now and say something, anything, really.

"Um... Hi. You're... You're the guy..." Oh, why did I say that? Four years of training and that was all my smart head could utter. Mrs Smith would weep if she heard.

Katy's Point of View.

His office was really cold. I knew shivering was something we were supposed to repel against. Mrs Smith couldn't be more clear in training. Good thing I was not a spy. If a naive and quite comedic housekeeper was what would keep my identity a secret, then I was all in.

"Are you alright?" He asked, peering over me. I nodded and quickly moved to the chair that faced his own seat. He was tall. Too tall if I was being honest. Crazy tall. Why hadn't they mentioned anything about his height?

"You may sit, miss..."

"Philips. Josie Philips." I squeaked out, falling behind on the chair.

He paused, staring at me for a while before sitting down ruggedly in his chair. Stroking his chin, he finally broke the silence. "You say it like you're not very sure."

"I'm not quite sure what you mean."

"You said your name with a hint of uncertainty."

"Yeah, only because you won't stop gawking at me." Woah. Why on earth could I not control my tongue since today?

He didn't say anything. If he was annoyed about my retort, I didn't know. I rushed to apologize.

"Oh my God, I am so sorry. I didn't mean it. I don't even know why I said that. I'm sorry."

"Ah."

At this point, I had nothing more to say.

"Sorry."

"You're nervous. We are all bound to be defensive when we are nervous."

What could I even say to that? He opened his laptop.

"You worked four years before you were without a job and I hired you."

Why did he say it like I was trouble? I mean, I did trust Mrs. Smith to handle communications with him, maybe that was a mistake. In fact, it was.

"Yes, that is correct sir."

"And you were fired?"

Wait, what? Was I supposed to say 'I think so?' "Yes, sir."

"Why?"

"Why?" I knew what he wanted to know, but perhaps delaying with this question would help me think of something. Anything at all. So far, I was coming up with nothing.

"Why were you fired?"

"There was a situation."

His eyes laughed even though his lips remained tight. "What situation?"

"I wanted to see Washington DC. I was born in Texas. Schooled in Texas. Kindergarten till college. I needed to see somewhere else."

"Funny I find Texas cooler than here." It was such a simple statement, but his face remained stern.

"Um... Well, we all have our preferences I guess."

"So you got fired because you wanted to see another part of the world?"

"Kinda."

"Hmm." He stood and walked to the curtains. Seriously, I thought blinds were the real deal now. "There are a number of rules that you need to know of if you're gonna be working here."

"If?" Johnson would laugh his head in if I got turned down. Didn't realize he had options.

"If." He confirmed, walking to the coffee stand. "I would not want you to run off on me. Maybe the next place you decide you wanna go to is Switzerland. I hear that green lushes are quite famous around there."

I rolled my eyes. "I hear some people get detained for sarcasm."

He turned quickly, spilling some of his coffee. "What was that?"

"Nothing."

"You said something."

"Yes, I said... Um..." Oh boy. "I do have questions of my own. I know that might sound crazy but it's true." He stares at me for a while, making my heart thud. He took a sip from his cup and strode swiftly to his chair.

"Okay, what did you hope to ask?" Oh boy! What did I want to ask?

"Um... Naturally, you are going to have to finish before I start warming up my questions. I have to know everything before I'm able to get my questions on board."

"Alright." He finally said. I tried not to stare into his eyes too much. And at this point, I wished when someone was annoying to you, a little of their genes becomes invisible to you.

"So... How am I so sure you're not going to turn on me?"

"I won't turn on you."

"How am I so sure?"

Why was he making this a problem? Move on already. "Okay, the thing is this, if you are so worried that I might go all AWOL on you, then let's do this, why don't I sign something."

"How am I guaranteed that would keep you?"

Okay, now he was just being repetitive. Annoyingly repetitive. "It's only natural that I sign a contract, I mean rich people had a lot of confidence in all that stuff?"

"We do, but I would have had more confidence if I was the one that thought of it."

"I assure you, I have no plans to ditch you."

Silence. Again! Men, was this blonde-eyed guy getting on my nerves with his whole James Bond move? "Alright, you will sign a contract." He took a sip from what I presumed would be a lukewarm coffee now. "But you should know, the grounds are quite extensive. Should you plan to run, there are going to be people waiting for you. With guns, maybe."

Wait, what?! First threat! This was his first time threatening me. I carefully tried to pull my phone out of my pocket and hit record. I would get him to say it again. This could be helpful in court or to the judges or a lawyer, whomever. For some reason, my phone couldn't quite make its way out. It was stuck. Great. When I realized he was still staring at me, I immediately plastered a sad look. No, not sad. A terrified look. That was what I needed.

''I won't run."

"That was meant to be a joke."

Are you sure, Carson? Thankfully, I had the willpower to control my lips before that slipped up.

"Okay, sir." That was much better.

"Next question."

Next question? We weren't done yet? Ah great.

"Do you have children?"

"No."

"Ever had children?"

"Nope."

"Ever been married?"

"No. But sure has been in a lot of dates." I joked. I knew it sounded crazy, but the monologuing tone was beginning to give the room more shade than the funny-looking curtains in place.

He stared at me and smiled, shaking his head. Well, that was a first.

"Do you like community?"

"Who doesn't?"

"Miss Philips, you can't answer a question with a question."

"I just did and you got what I meant, right?"

"Well, when I am asking you questions, let it be questions and answers. I don't have time for decoding all these fancy talks you have been laying around.

"Fancy?"

"Yes, so if you don't mind, no more questions after questions. Just answer after questions, got it?" He wasn't completely growling, but the smile had vanished into thin air. God, I missed home. So much.

"Yes, sir."

"Okay. So let's continue. So you like community?"

"I do."

"You've also noticed that this house is within a... Concealed residence. How exactly do you plan to be connected to the community?"

"I don't know. Yet."

"Would you mind elaborating further?"

"No." Woah.

He raised his eyes from the screen he had been perusing and stared into mine.

"May I ask why?"

"Because I don't know yet."

"Ah."

"Yes."

He squinted his eyes at me. "You know I told you to answer a question, I didn't tell you to begin answering in a monologuing manner."

"I am trying to be civil."

He gulped down coffee. "Alright, what are your questions?"

"You're done asking me yours?"

"Yes."

"Okay, do you write letters?"

"No."

"Okay. Well, I like writing letters. I like delivering them to the small box shop just before the borders."

"So, your point is?"

"I would like to be writing letters. I would not like to stop. So, I just... Well, I want to know how I would be going about it."

"Very well, Morris will take care of that. He will take your letters and he will deliver them."

"Why can't I just deliver them myself?"

"It's miles and miles and miles away. And that is why Morris is present. He will provide you with all the outside service you need."

Wait. Why was he so bent on making rules that kept us locked in? I swayed.

"Do you mind if I poured myself a cup?" I asked, pointing to the coffee table.

"Pour all the coffee you can handle."

"Thank you." I needed caffeine. Immediately, I stood up and poured a cup to the brim.

"I'd like to handle the letters myself."

He studied my face for a while.

"Why?"

Why? Great question. Except I had no answers to give in return. Boy, oh boy.

"Erm... I do like to meet the man who runs the place in person. He's my friend."

"How often do you write these letters?"

"Two times a week."

"And who do you write them to?"

"Family." Okay, now my heart was beating fast.

He studied me for a while, before squinting back at his laptop. "It does say here that you have no family."

Oh, Mrs Smith and her ways. This wasn't 1978 anymore. I frantically searched my mind for something. Anything.

"I have friends. I do consider friends family. Do you not?"

"I don't have friends." His tone was steel.

"Oh... Okay. Yeah, well I do. I am not really willing to let go of what I have with them."

"And if I say no?"

Well, that was a bummer. "Sir, I want this job. I want to work here but at this point, I'm not ready to let go of my friends to work for you. If you would give me three months for trial, you would see that it is... That I am... I will be good at this job."

"I never said you won't be."

"Yeah, but you thought it. You're thinking it now in fact."

"You don't know that for sure, now do you?" He was holding in a smile.

"Ah, but I do read minds."

He didn't say anything for a while. Squinting.

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Alright. I will let you deliver your letters. It will not be easy because it is quite extensive, but I'll give you a chance."

I smiled. I guess Johnson wouldn't be laughing at me after all. "Yay."

Just then, a knock sounded at the door.

"Come in."

The door opened to reveal a rather plump woman. "You're even more beautiful than Morris described." She smiled brightly. Her red hair matched her shoes. Her very high shoes. Wait, was that mandatory?

"Miss Philips, meet Adelaide. She's the cook. Very distinguished in the kitchen."

She smiled. If I didn't know better, I would say she batted her lashes at him. Maybe this mission wasn't going to be as drama-less as I thought. I waved at her.

"Hi Adelaide. I'm Josie."

"I know I have said this before but you are very very beautiful."

"Thank you. You are very beautiful. I cannot wait to work with you."

She smiled again. Didn't her cheeks hurt?

"Would you mind showing her around, Adelaide? Make sure she knows the grounds quite well."

"Yes, sir. I look forward to seeing you at dinner."

"Thank you. You too."

Men could be so oblivious without trying so hard.

"It's so nice to have another woman in the house. I'm more happy than I let on." She said immediately the door to Mr Cooper's office closed.

"I have worked with women before but none as beautiful as you. And kind."

She smiled again. "Good to know. You're not single are you?"

"Why do you ask?" Was that also a requirement to live in this rather vast estate? It was so tiring.

"Well, I just thought I'd let you know that Mr Carson already has his hands full and I'd hate anything to come between this report we're forming." She said. Sweetly? Wait what?

I was still standing there when she happily walked ahead. Great. Now I was in a semi-love triangle I knew nothing about. Great. Just great.