Xavier my Nemesis!

"Good morning Mr Crest". I greeted my arrogant boss and as usual, he strolled past me with a frown on his face not even acknowledging my existence.

"Asshole," I muttered under my breath. I continue to type away at my desk as I am very busy. It isn't like there's ever a day that I am not busy or overworked, I thought to myself.

I took this job, in hopes of working for just a few months to raise money to start a business and be self-employed but I find it hard to leave now because my boss constantly threatens to give us a bad review should we want to leave his company and go elsewhere and I haven't been able to raise enough capital for the business yet.

I have lots of bills to pay and I have to strategize properly before starting so I wouldn't incur losses and debts. So for now I'm absolutely stuck in TechUp.

"Sydney!" I suddenly heard my boss call out.

"Yes sir!" I answered scurrying to put the files on my desk in order while also hurrying not to waste this evil man's time as his temper is very short.

"Have you booked my flight to Italy?" he asked as soon as I entered his office.

"Yes, I have, sir," I replied.

"Have you confirmed my 10 a.m. meeting with the investors?"

"Yes, sir. It's on your calendar"

"Have you drafted the announcement for the new feature launch?" he shot at me again

"Erm I'm actually still currently on it, I just need to add the template-" I was stuttering, intimidated by his queries.

"Can't you see the time?" he snapped, cutting me off mid-sentence.

"I see, I was very occupied with the new launch so I couldn't com-"

"I don't have time for your excuses. Are you done with it or not?" he asked glaring at me.

"I would be in say, hmm 30 minutes-"

"Finish it up in 10 minutes and get it across to me before I start my meeting with the new investors" he said dismissively, already setting up his desk for the day. I sensed that he was done with me, I was heading out when he said.

"Also get me my coffee, the usual- and I mean right now" he said with a bored expression, without even looking at me.

I wonder how he expects me to meet up with the announcement now that he asked me to make his coffee, knowing it takes more time because of how specifically he likes his cup of coffee.

I made the coffee hurriedly and came back to my desk to start working on the product launch in order to meet the 10-minute time frame he gave me. I was typing away when I suddenly heard a noise coming from the reception area of the office.

I was about to go get a view of what was happening when I saw her. The boss's girlfriend-more like the boss's bitch, I thought to myself.

Bianca strides past me, with a scowl on her face, obviously very furious. She hit my desk, almost knocking off my laptop. I looked up at her shocked but she had almost gotten to Xavier's office by then and I could see her smirk from her side view.

I went back to work, ignoring the rising anger within me. She was so rude and it's not like I was the reason behind her anger, I thought.

"How dare you end things with me?! And over text for that matter. What is the matter with you?!" I heard Bianca shrieking very loudly. I rolled my eyes-this situation has played out way too many times than I can count. They basically do this at least twice a month.

Just then, the new receptionist, Jane, zoomed past me without having any knowledge of how Xavier's and Bianca's relationship worked.

Apparently, Xavier gave her a stern warning not to let Bianca into his office, he has always done this with the last receptionist as well but she got tired of Bianca's threats and stayed clear of her way whenever she came to throw her monthly tantrums.

Jane, oblivious to the situation at hand, barged into Xavier's office trying to stop Bianca. I would have warned her not to go but she had already gotten herself into the mess.

"Get out now!!!" Xavier and Bianca screamed simultaneously.

"Stupid bitch, out now!" Bianca added

Jane zoomed out just as she entered, cheeks red from embarrassment. I felt sorry for her, poor thing, she'd learn, just as the last girl learnt.

"How could you do this to me?! After what- three years! Wasting my time with you Xavier!" Bianca kept screaming at the top of her voice

"I can't do this anymore Bianca, I am done, I can't keep doing this with you" Xavier replied, his voice icily calm and composed, almost like he was used to her tantrums, therefore he wasn't moved at all.

"How can you say that baby? after everything we've been through, how can you?" I heard Bianca say, sounding like a rejected child.

"Look, Bianca, listen and listen good, I am not interested in whatever this is anymore cos I'm darn sure it doesn't count as a relationship anymore. I'll send my driver to pick the rest of your things from my loft and get them across to you and I'd very much appreciate it if you keep me blocked permanently and I'll keep the same energy" Xavier said keeping his voice level-headed.

Suddenly there was a loud splash.

"Bianca! What the hell!" Xavier yelped

"What is wrong with you? Can't you fathom the idea that we cannot be together anymore? This is exactly why I can't be with you, you're too toxic!"

Xavier's voice thundered, finally giving in to anger. I was so curious to know what was happening so I sat up slightly while stretching my neck to see what was happening but in a few seconds, Xavier stormed out of the office.

I sat back down immediately, pretending to be very engaged with work. Then I stole a glance at Xavier without lifting my head and I instantly understood what had happened.

Bianca had spilled the coffee I spent my precious making all over Xavier's blue suit and white inner shirt. I gasped, entertained and shocked at the same time, at how far Bianca went this time.

Xavier stormed to the reception and I could see how everyone who gathered to witness the altercation disappeared instantly as Xavier gave them a death stare.

He was pacing, clenching, and unclenching his fists, trying to control his anger. Then he stormed to my desk.

"Order me a new suit and inner shirt now!" He roared at me.

"Erm s-sir, h-how do I-I pay" I stammered, cowering in fear.

He then threw me his credit card after telling me the pin. I took it and ordered him new clothes, my hands shaking as I typed because he stood opposite me, drilling holes in my head. He asked to wait in my office until his clothes arrived.

In about 30 minutes his clothes came in and he wordlessly collected them and went into his office.

Almost as soon as he entered, Bianca resumed her confrontation but this time she was hysterical. She started crying loudly.

"Baby I didn't mean to do that, I was just really upset. I'm so sorry" she cried.

"I was really hurt that you called me toxic, it's like calling me an animal, like someone that has no control but I just love you a lot hence my behavior. Please forgive me Xavier" she kept saying amidst tears, sobbing, and hiccuping.

There was a pause from Xavier and Bianca's hiccups filled the air. Then he replied when he saw that she wouldn't stop crying.

"You know you aren't sexy when you cry like this. It's okay hmm" Xavier said soothing her.

Then they were silent for a few more minutes and this must be the making up part, I thought-having studied the dynamics of their relationship, I knew this would happen and it played out exactly as I thought it would except I was shocked when I started hearing kissing sounds.

Following the kissing sound, came groans and moans from Xavier and Bianca, taking their makeup session to another level.

I listened dumbfounded as the two adults who were just in a heated fight minutes ago were now settling it in a moment of passion.

"Oh yeah, Xavier-- yeahhh --deeper please! hmmmm" Bianca moaned. I was so disgusted that I had to plug in my earphones to drown out their lustful sounds.

After several minutes I started to hear Bianca yelling at Xavier again, I unplugged my earphones to hear what was going on again.

"So you mean to tell me that you still intend to break up even after what we just did! Why did you have sex with me if you don't want to make up with me?!" Bianca screamed shamelessly at Xavier.

"Well you basically forced yourself on me, it's not like I can say no to all that" I heard Xavier say.

"You're such an arrogant asshole that doesn't even deserve a good woman like me, fuck you, Xavier!" Bianca screamed while shoving Xavier aside as she stormed out.

I could see her puffy, tear-stained eyes with mascara as she hastily rushed out.

"What a pity" I exclaimed under my breath, shaking my head. I

was tempted to feel pity for her but I suddenly remembered how bad-mannered she is and I remember why she deserves what she keeps subjecting herself to.

"Sydney!" Xavier called out. I jumped up remembering the announcement I had hastily prepared during the whole scuffle.

I entered his office and I can see his shirt unbuttoned while wiping a lipstick stain from his lips which I'm assuming is from Bianca.

I couldn't help but stare at his chiseled chest, pumping rapidly and shiny from sweat. A full pack of six abs staring deliciously back at me. Without thinking, I licked my lips.

"Erm h-here is t-t-the package--sorry I mean file" I stuttered, suddenly unable to concentrate.

Xavier looked up and traced the direction of my eye to his chest, he looked down and upon seeing the reason for my discomfort, he looked directly at me and smirked.

"You could perfectly draw me naked at this point because your eyes have stripped me bare" He said mockingly, smirking in amusement. I instantly flush, my cheeks reddening and hot in embarrassment.

"Sorry sir" I quickly muttered, dropping the files on his desk dashing out of his office.

"What was that?" I asked myself when I got to my desk.

I yawned, exhausted from the day's work. I really had a long day, coupled with the whole drama that happened with my boss and his girlfriend-or more like ex for a very short well, till they picked up things from where they left off.

I looked at the time and I gasped, not expecting it to be this late- the time was 8:46pm. Closing hours are 5pm but due to my workload, I had to work extra late.

Just as I started clearing up my desk, preparing to leave, my phone rang and on checking the caller ID, a smile slowly crept to the corner of my mouth.

"Heyyy!" I said, picking up, trying to sound enthusiastic despite being tired.

"Hey beautiful" Drake's voice filled my ears.

"How are you doing?" he asked

"Oh, Drake! I had such a long day, it was crazy", I exclaimed. By now I had already packed my bag and was heading out of the company.

The cool evening breeze brushed past my face, my long blonde hair slightly flying above my shoulders. I was walking to the bus station so I could get a bus home.

"Don't tell me your boss and his girl were at it again today" he said laughing.

"You already know what's happening," I replied, joining in his laughter. We exchanged more pleasantries while I walked to the bus station, he was filling me in on his day.

Drake and I have been friends since we were both freshmen at NYU. We used to attend some classes together but never really spoke to each other, until he randomly spoke to me in class one day. We basically hit it off since then and have remained friends ever since.

Drake didn't really hide his feelings for me, he mostly masked it with humor so I knew he liked me more than a just a friend but he never really approached me about it seriously-he often flirted with me occasionally but nothing concrete for me to consider, but recently, he has been more vocal about this feelings for me, he even told me he wanted something serious with me and finally confessed that he has been in love with me ever since the first time he saw me in class.

I told him I needed more time because we've been friends for so long, it would take a lot for me to start seeing him as someone more than just a friend.

He really is a good and nice guy but I just need time to sort through my feelings. These days, I've realized I'm leaning into liking him more than a friend because he makes it easier for me because of his extra sweetness and very obvious soft spot for me.

"Sooo..... What are you doing this weekend?" Drake asked coolly.

"Erm nothing really much, I have a doctor's appointment on Saturday and when I get back I want to finish up deliverables and hand them over to my boss on Monday" I replied.

"So that leaves Sunday open right?" he asked suggestively. I smiled, knowing where he was stirring the conversation to.

"Yes, that leaves Sunday free for me" I responded, smiling. The thought of seeing him makes me a little giddy.

We have both been busy these days which has made us hang out less than we usually did back in school. I have always enjoyed Drake's company even while we were strictly friends so I didn't mind at all.

"Perfect! Let's hang out this weekend and there's a dress code for you" he said

"Oh wow, what's the dress code?" I asked, playfully indulging him

"Well just put on something really pretty.... not like you don't already look more beautiful with each passing day- but something extra cos I have something important I really want to talk to you about" he said, his voice sounding sonorous. I smiled, already guessing what he wanted to talk about.

"Aye aye captain" I responded playfully while giggling. I am about two minutes away from home now.

"So I guess you must almost be home now," Drake says on cue. He knows my daily routine because he makes sure to call at least once a day.

"Yeah, I guess we'd talk tomorrow" I replied

"Bye beautiful, sweet dreams" Drake said, ending the call. I freshened up as soon as I got home and I slept off as soon as my head hit my pillow, I have had the longest day.

******

It was the day of my doctor's appointment. I got to the hospital and went to see my doctor. He referred me to the fertility section of the hospital to run some tests. I started to worry about something being wrong.

"I hope there isn't an issue Doctor Ray?" I asked, reading his name tag.

"We noticed some things that don't add up in the test we carried out, so it's better to do a full body scan to be sure" He explained, and upon seeing how my face fell, he added quickly.

"I'm sure it's nothing to worry about" He said, giving me a reassuring smile. I was led into the lab by a petite nurse.

I lay on the bed and an ointment was rubbed on my belly. After some uncomfortable minutes, the ultrasound screen went dark, and the room suddenly felt too quiet.

I pulled my blouse back down, trying to read the doctor's expression before he even spoke.

Dr. Bennett slid his chair closer, my file open in his hands. His voice was gentle, but there was a seriousness behind it.

"Okay," he began, "I want to explain this clearly so you understand what's going on with your body."

My heart thudded. "Is something wrong?"

"Not wrong," he said carefully.

"Your ovarian reserve is extremely low for your age. Based on your results, your fertility is likely to decline rapidly. I can see from your records that you're currently 29 but by the time you clock 32, there is a 95 percent chance you won't be able to conceive naturally."

I blinked. "So... what does that mean for my future?"

"It means if you want a biological child someday, the safest option is to freeze your eggs now. Except you're looking to give birth within the next 3 years. Eggs frozen at twenty-nine stay twenty-nine. Even if you try to get pregnant at forty, we would be using younger eggs. It isn't a guarantee, but it preserves your chance."

He turned the screen so I could see the chart. "Most women your age have a certain range of healthy follicles, yours is significantly below that range. You can still get pregnant naturally that's important to understand, but the window is smaller."

I swallowed. "How small?"

Dr. Bennett didn't rush. "Based on your numbers, the next three years are the most crucial. After 32, your chances of conceiving naturally drop sharply. Not impossible, just much more difficult."

The words felt heavy, pressing on my chest.

"So what do I do?"

"That depends on what you want for your future," he replied.

"If having biological children is important to you someday, I strongly recommend freezing your eggs now, while they're still healthy. Egg freezing won't pause time, but it preserves younger eggs you can use later, even if your natural fertility declines." I stared at the floor, feeling devastated.

"Will I still be able to get pregnant after 32 if I freeze them?"

"Yes," he said softly. "That's the whole point. These eggs remain the same age they are today. Even if you're 35, 38, or older, you can still try with the eggs you froze now." My fingers tightened around the edge of the chair.

"I... I didn't think this would be my reality." I whispered very quietly, the weight of his words dawning on me.

He gave me a sympathetic smile. "No one ever does. But this isn't a failure. It's information, and information gives you choices." My eyes stung, my vision starting to blur but I blinked the tears away.

"So my body is telling me to decide now," I replied sadly

"It's giving you a heads-up," he said. "And you're doing the right thing by coming in early."

He closed my file gently. "Take a day or two to process this. Freezing your eggs is entirely your choice. But medically? It gives you the best chance." I nodded slowly.

Suddenly, I was curious to know how much the procedure would cost so I asked.

"How much would this option cost?"

"I would have to check with the accounting team and get back to you on that" Dr. Bennett answers, smiling reassuringly.

He then proceeded to make inquiries immediately. I sat depressed with my thoughts until he came back. He came back several minutes later, settling back into his seat.

"Okay, let me walk you through the costs so you understand everything clearly." He says. I nodded, even though my chest already felt tight.

"The full egg-freezing cycle," he continued, "comes to about twenty thousand dollars." My eyebrows shot up.

"Twenty... what?" I asked bewildered

"Twenty thousand," he repeated gently. "That covers the hormone injections, the monitoring, the retrieval procedure, the anesthesia, and the initial freezing."

I swallowed hard. "That's... a lot."

"I know." His voice softened. "It's expensive everywhere, especially in New York. And that's just for one cycle."

"One?" My voice cracked. "So I might need more than one?"

"It's possible," he said. "Some women need two or even three cycles to collect enough eggs, depending on their ovarian reserve."

I looked down at my hands, my fingers curling into my palms. "I don't even have the money for one cycle."

He paused, then added quietly, "We also charge annual storage fees-around a thousand dollars a year. But the biggest hurdle is the initial twenty thousand."

My stomach twisted. "I can't afford that. Not even close." The tears I'd been fighting rolled down fast and made my voice shaky.

"I understand," he said, sliding a box of tissues toward me. "I know this is a lot to process. You don't have to make any decisions today. But I wanted you to have the full picture."

I nodded slowly, my throat tight. "Thank you, doctor. I just... I need a moment."

"Take all the time you need."

I stood up and dashed to the restroom instantly. The tears were now uncontrollable as I closed the bathroom door. I shakenly picked up my phone and dialed the only one who could soothe me right now.

"H-hello..... my life is ruinedddd!" I exclaimed as soon as the call connected.

"Whoa! Breathe Sydney-what happened?!" My best friend's voice filled with panic as she asked in perplexity.

"What's happening Syd?" She paused, "I'm beginning to get very worried-did someone die?" She asked worriedly.

"Okay, breathe....in, out, yes just like that" she says trying to get me stable.

After inhaling and exhaling for a few minutes, the hiccups subsided and I could talk a bit more clearly. I started baring my heart out to Ava.

"Oh Ava, my dreams are so shattered" I echoed. "Wait where are you?" She asked

"I'm sitting in a toilet stall at an hospital" Ava shrieked as soon as I said that.

"Oh my God Sydney, I'm on my way now!" I could hear her car keys jingling hurriedly.

"Oh no I'm fine, well at least physically but my mental health is in shambles right now" I said, more to myself than her.

"I wasn't involved in an accident or anything like that" I assured her.

"So what then is the matter?" She asked. I sucked in air before I started.

"Well technically, I have less than two years to either find someone to knock me up and pop out at least three kids from me or set up a GoFundMe account to be able to freeze my eggs" I said trying to sound humorous but sounding distressed instead.

"Oh wow, you lost me at the popping out babies part. You know what, can you manage to get home yourself and call me as soon as you get home or do you need me to skip work and come pick you up right now?" She asked affectionately.

Pulling her from her job is the last thing I wanted to do because I know how demanding her job is and it would be selfish of me to do that.

"Oh no no it's fine, I'll manage to get myself home then we can talk properly" I said reassuringly.

"Okay babes, I'll order you an Uber and I will try to leave work early so we can talk face-to-face" Ava says sweetly.

This is one out of the many reasons I cherish our friendship, she is willing to drop everything to comfort me at any low moment. My heart instantly fills with gratitude.

"Please hang in there babes, okay?, Let me know as soon as you get home, love you girl" she says.

"Love you too, bye" I said, my spirit lifting just a little bit since the minute I came out of the doctor's office.

The minutes leading until I got home went by in a blur. I was lost in thought. I was brought back to reality when the Uber driver announced that I had arrived at my destination.

I got down and went into my apartment immediately. I just wanted the comfort of my home so I could cry as much and as loud as I wanted.

I took out my phone and dialed Ava to tell her that I had gotten home. She picked up at the first ring, she must have been anticipating my call.

"Babes I'm so sorry, I can't come over right now, I have a lottttt of work to catch up on. I had to sneak to the bathroom to even talk to you right now" She says guiltily, emphasizing the 't's' to tell me how much work she has to do.

Of course, I understood and couldn't blame her. She works at an investment bank and the job is so demanding that it requires her to work during the weekend sometimes.

"It's okay Ava, really. I know you really wish to be here for me" I said to her reassuringly.

"So what's happening, Syd? I'm very worried about you" Ava says.

"Well you know I had a doctor's appointment planned cos I wanted to run a general body test right?"

"Hmmm," Ava replied affirmatively.

"So I find out that my ovarian reserve is very low and I have basically less than two years before I am unable to conceive naturally. My only options now are either to start actively considering having a child or resort to freezing my eggs now so I can preserve them till I'm ready in the future" I explained briefly to her.

"Oh my Gosh Syd, this is a lot to process" she says affectionately.

"I think the egg freezing option is a very good solution for this situation" she suggests.

"Well it would've been if it didn't cost twenty thousand bucks" I say.

"Holy shit!! That's a whole lot of money, Syd!" She exclaimed, shocked just like I was.

"Oh my God, this is really a lot babes, I'm so sorry you're going through all this. It's honestly a lot" Ava says soothingly.

"So what do you think of doing?" She asked after a moment of silence.

"Well, I can't afford freezing my eggs so it's either I start talking about a child to Drake..... as he is the only man in my life right now and a man I can trust with my child as well, or I would have to give in to adoption. I don't think it would be as expensive as the egg freezing option" I say

"Do you think Drake wouldn't think of me as crazy if I ask if he could impregnate me asap?" I asked her.

"Well judging from your guys' relationship over the years, the guy would do anything for you, he would be overjoyed to go on that journey with you, he's head over heels in love with you Sdy" She says confidently.

"Hmm, you think so?" I wondered.

"I know so, Syd, have you seen the way he looks at you? He would gladly do it. I know adoption is the last thing you want to do. I know how much you really want your own kids and naturally for that matter. You've always talked about it since we were kids" She points out.

"Right!" I say, remembering briefly about how much I used to yap about my future family growing up because I didn't really have one.

Dad was gone a few months after I turned 13 and Mom lost herself and hasn't found herself back up to date.

"Okay, I'll talk to him" I tell Ava. "Matter of fact, invite him over tonight. I don't want you to be alone and sad tonight. You could use some company" she suggests.

"I don't want to bother him"

"Who says you're bothering him, as if he ever complained about you bothering him?"

"Well not really but still...." I trailed off.

"Still nothing Syd, you have always been pushing Drake away even after he continuously proves that he's got you all these years but you still keep rejecting him" She paused.

"You know you would have to try and see for yourself to know he isn't like the other guys right?"

"I know it's just that I'm so scared to ruin our friendship if things don't work out you know-he has really been a good friend to me and I wouldn't want to lose all that" I said, finally admitting my fear out loud.

"Well you would still ruin the friendship either way if you don't give him a chance because he'll get tired of chasing and lusting after you and he would eventually stop and move on someday and it will hurt you so much for not trying at all and I know you like him, Syd. You always second guess yourself all the time and it isn't good for you."

"Ughh! I hate when you're so right" I groaned while blushing. Ava laughs.

"Okay, okay, I'll give him a chance-but if it doesn't work out you're to be blamed" I said to her, pointing a finger accusingly at the air forgetting that she can't see me.

"I'll take that chance boo" she cooed playfully. "Oops...I have to go now Syd, call him and please take care of yourself okay?" Ava says hurriedly.

They must have noticed her absence at work by now.

"Okay, love you girl " I say, hanging up.

I let myself fall onto the bed from my sitting position, in defeat. I thought for a moment about how my conversation with Drake would go. I kept on playing different scenarios in my head.

I was lost in my thoughts when my phone started ringing. I picked it up and on checking the caller ID, it was the man whom I was actively thinking about, I couldn't help but smile.

"Hey Beautiful" Drake says sexily as he usually does. That's his pet name for me. I catch myself smiling and blushing whenever he calls me that these past few months. I secretly liked it but I never told him that.

"Heyy Drake" I replied trying to feign excitement but deep down, I wasn't feeling anything but sadness and worry- sad because it the whole situation and worried about how he would take the news I'm about to share with him.

"How is my favorite human doing today"

"Erm, actually there's something I want to share with you" I state, straight to the point because I was drained emotionally and was in no mood for pleasantries.

"Oh, what's wrong Sydney?" He asked worried

"A lot is going on in my life right now and I'm trying to wrap my head around it, I'm about to ask you for a huge favour" I said.

There was a pause on his end and I thought for a second that he was distracted or wasn't listening to me, then I heard the jingling of keys.

"Hang on Sydney, I'm coming to you right now. Gimme a couple of minutes, okay?"

"Okay," I said blushing extremely hard. I didn't even ask if he could come over, I didn't have to ask-he would drop everything to come and comfort me whenever I needed it.

I couldn't stop smiling, he was too good to be true, that's why I have always been scared to change our friendship dynamic to more than friends. I'm scared I would lose this but I am getting to the point where I can't ignore my subtle feelings for him anymore.

I really want him and I know for sure that he wants me to, so why am I pushing him away? I question myself.

At that moment I promised myself to finally accept him.

I saw him parking his car not too far from my apartment a few minutes after the call. I was so excited and positive that tonight would end in a good way for both of us.

I could see Drake stepping down from his car and walking to my doorstep. I couldn't help but smile as I saw him making his way to my door.

Drake has always been handsome, though not much taller than I am but tall enough for him to bend his head a little to kiss my forehead. He had a lot of girls chasing him in uni but he always rejected them and dreamily chased after me.

I opened the door before he could knock. "Hey beautiful," he says, hugging me before I let him in. Seeing my red and puffy eyes, he worriedly asked.

"What's wrong, beautiful? Have you been crying? What's going on, Sydney?" He paused. "Does what you wanted to talk to me about have to do with you crying so much?" He asked painfully.

I spent the next few minutes recounting details of how the doctor's appointment went. "Oh my God Sydney" he says shockingly after I told him everything.

"What do you want to do?" He asked me, staring at me affectionately.

"Well, I definitely cannot afford to freeze my eggs. It's too expensive for me and would affect my finances" I said, then quickly added before he could respond " I really want to have children of my own, and since I can't wait that long, I'm thinking of doing it now."

I paused while muttering the courage to ask a question that might change everything.

"Would you like to be my sperm donor?" I asked, rushing my words and holding my breath.

"Sperm donor?" Drake asked frowning "What do you mean sperm donor?" He asked with a scowl on his face.

"Well that's the only option I can afford now and-"

"Sydney" he called softly "if I'm to come in, in this situation, I don't want to come in as a sperm donor-how can you ask me that? I want to come in as your baby daddy, as your lover- not a flimsy 'sperm donor'," he gestured an air quote with his hands irritatedly.

On hearing this, my grin was very large and I let out the breath I had been holding.

"Oh really?" I asked my cheeks reddening.

"Yes Sydney, I have always wanted you for the longest time and now that there's a chance for us to be more than friends then you ask me to be your sperm donor instead, I don't like that" he said with a serious expression.

"I'm sorry Drake, I just didn't know how you'd respond to the news, I didn't want to outrightly ask to have your baby, I didn't know how you'd respond" I said quickly

"Hell yeah.... I'll be your sperm donor, I'll be your baby daddy, I'll be your lover, your boyfriend anything you want me to be Sydney" he says affectionately, holding my face in his hands.

"Even if you didn't ask me to father your child-which I would absolutely do in a heartbeat- you know I can always help you with anything you need. I can bear the cost of you freezing your eggs if you ever change your mind" he says lovingly and my heart felt warm with affection and gratitude that he would go that far for me.

I always knew he was rich but I didn't like asking him for favors that had to do with money.

"Look I know this is not the time for this but I can't wait anymore. I wanted to wait till tomorrow, that's why I asked to see you and to wear something nice. I wanted to take you to a fancy restaurant and officially ask you to be my girlfriend" he says, smiling sweetly.

I was filled with so many emotions all at once. I was grinning so hard, my cheeks burning and shining a bright red.

"Oh Drake" I blurted breathlessly. Emotions are choking my words.

"I want to be your boyfriend first before anything else, your baby daddy, and hopefully someday your husband". He says, looking directly into my eyes.

I smiled sweetly and let him bring my face to his until there's barely any space left. When he brought his lips to mine, I smiled. He kissed me softly and after some minutes I broke the kiss and whispered to him.

"Yes Drake, I will be your girlfriend" he smiled delightedly.

He kissed me passionately, pouring into the kiss all the years of his feelings for me that he had been trying to suppress.

I was very shy and not into my feelings as much as Drake was into his because I still found it weird to be intimate with my closest male friend. I suddenly sprang to my feet, breaking the kiss.

"Drake, I know the plan is to start trying for a kid but can we wait a bit? I need to prepare myself mentally and acknowledge the fact that we're shifting from friends to something much more" I said to him.

"As much as I love to devour you right now...I have to respect your wishes and follow in your lead, girlfriend," he said, flirtily. I giggled like a child.

Drake and I went to bed together. I made sure nothing happened.

For some reason I can't explain, my body and heart are refusing to open up fully to Drake. I like him for sure but I don't know if my feelings for him are passionate enough for me to spend the rest of my life with him.

Am I just using him to get what I truly want? I ask myself, deep in thought before he stretched his hands and pulled me into his arms and cuddled me till I fell asleep.