When I'm With You

Kringgg... Kringgg... Kringgg...

"Argh!" In a half-closed eyes, I tapped the annoying device called an alarm clock on top of the bedside table. "How I wish the night had been longer than the day," I muttered.

And with a loud, long sigh, I tried to open my eyes and adjusted to the sudden brightness coming from the huge glass window on the left side of my bed.

I checked the time from the annoying clock and it's only 7:00 in the morning, but because I have a meeting with my talent manager, I think I have no choice but to get up and do my morning routine. I hate mornings. I'm not a morning person. Sometimes, I just have no choice but to pull myself out of the bed because I'm a part-time model... a commercial model, a product endorser to be exact. One of the things my so-called husband doesn't know about me.

Hmm... yes, I'm married and it just happened almost two months ago. A grand wedding? No, it was just a very simple civil wedding which was attended only by my parents, two of my friends, some relatives of my husband, and of course, his grandfather who sat in a wheelchair was also present. The person behind everything or should I say the reason why our so-called wedding took place. And about the other details, well I'll tell you the next time.

I'm Rafi, by the way... Rafaela Gonzalez, in short, Rafi, but since I'm already married, I am now Rafaela Gonzalez Clarkson. I'm 26 years old, a woman living in her simple dreams... but that was before our wedding happened. Well, it's not that I can't do the things that I want to do, but because there are now people watching my every move.

Wearing my floral spaghetti strap top and white denim shorts, I finally got out of my room and headed downstairs, and went straight to the kitchen.

But I was just walking into the huge dining area and my jaws dropped as well as my mood. It's because I saw the person ignoring me for almost two months... my husband. I'm used to it, I mean, his behavior. The thing I'm not used to is seeing him in the kitchen when I wake in the morning because he used to leave the house at 6:00 and came home at 10:00 and sometimes at 11:00 in the evening. And not to mention that today is Monday.

Maybe he had just finished his breakfast as his both hands are now occupied by the newspaper.

Oh, by the way, meet my 'husband', Liam Samuel Jones Clarkson, but all his relatives including me called him 'Liam'. I'm sure you want to find out how he looks and what he does in life. Hmm... well, he's kinda handsome --- fine --- he's really handsome!

And like the Greek God in fantasy movies, he also has broad shoulders, well-built muscles, a toned chest (actually, I haven't seen him in person shirtless, only in magazines as he's been featured as the youngest billionaire and top-earning CEO according to Forbes). He also has a sharp jawline, pointed nose, and ohh... just imagine Henry Cavill (the superman), Chris Hemsworth (Thor), and Jaime Dornan (Christian Grey) in one.

Isn't he handsome? Yes, he is, the problem is that he has 'some' attitude problems... in short, bipolar. We always pretend we don't know each other inside the house as if our presence didn't exist for each other. I just don't know outside or in public as we haven't seen each other in public since the day of our wedding. And another thing, he loves to keep his voice for himself... he would speak when he wants and when he does, I always try to avoid him or move away as far as much as possible from him as I don't want to hear his rants especially when our housemaids have done something he doesn't like.

'Haist!'-

So, even though confusion struck the outer layer of my brain for a few seconds, I managed to compose myself, went straight to the fridge, and ignored him as we did in those times we saw each other around the house.

Singing softly my favorite Carol Banawa song 'Till it's time, I took all the pancake ingredients from the fridge and start cooking I had never seen him just a while ago and his presence 'doesn't exist.

"🎶One day you came and oh, you are so near me. I smiled and then you turned and didn't see me. How am I supposed to get to meet you? What should I do? You're in my dreams I feel it seems that you don't feel it quite the way I do.🎶"

Turning around the table's direction, I saw that he lowered the magazine and is now looking at me, but I continued the song and pretended to be oblivious of his dominant stares. Hmm... I don't care what he thinks. I clearly remember what he told me the night after the wedding that I can do 'whatever I want'... and now that I want to sing... I don't care what thinks.

"🎶You're in my mind almost all the time. Every single minute all I do is think of you. And deep inside, in this heart of mine, I have to go on wishing 'till it's time. Yeah... hey... ohh.🎶"

The moment I finished the song is the moment he stood up, took his plate and silverware, and slowly walked over the sink.

But of course, since I'm unaffected by his presence, I continued humming the last part of the song which is 'yeah... hey... ohh. But then I stopped when he got my attention.

With a serious face, he told me...

"You know what, why don't you just go and scream outside since you seemed to love exercising your vocal cords?" Sarcasm was woven into his voice but I just smiled.

"Oh, thanks, but no thanks. I have already practiced my vocal cords earlier while I was taking a bath, so I think that's enough." I shrugged.

He didn't say anything, but I didn't miss his sharp intake of breath as if he was just controlling his temper.

-'Ahah... I guess he didn't expect my come back!'- I laughed mentally behind him when he ignored me completely.

But then he was just taking a few steps away from me when he turned around.

"Tss! So annoying!"

He snorted, whispering the last part, but I still heard it all.

"Oh, yeah, you're right, I'm pretty annoying and there's nothing you can do about it." I muttered under my breath with a chuckle and decided to continue the song where I ended a while ago."🎶Yes, deep inside in this heart of mine, I have to go on wishing 'till it's time🎶."

I have no idea why he's still home at this hour. He's wearing a business suit, so I'm sure he's going to work, I just don't know what delayed him this time.

After finishing the most delicious chocolate pancakes in town--- of course, made by myself--- I called the attention of our housekeepers and asked them if they already had breakfast.

But since they haven't eaten yet, I asked them to stop what they're doing so we can have breakfast together.

Honestly, I treat them as friends more than housemaids. Maybe because I grew up in a simple family so I hadn't experienced having servants around me so I really appreciate their efforts. Not to mention that my adoptive parents taught me how to be kind and appreciate all the things around me whether they are big or small, especially the people who continue to make my character and personality grow.

Ahm... yes, I'm an adopted child. Rafaela or Rafi, my parents' biological child died when she was only three years old due to leukemia, and three months after losing her, they found me in a train station in Cincinnati.

Even though there was their strong desire to keep me to pacify their grief over the loss of their only child, the heart of being parents still occurred and they couldn't bear not to inform the authorities about me.

But a month has passed, two and three... no one came looking for me nor asked about me, so without second thoughts, they took me and brought me with them on their way home. They took care of me, loved me, and treated me like their own.

And even though I knew that the name they gave me was the name of their lost child, they never made me feel that I was just a second place, second best, or a replacement for the real Rafi. They loved me and gave everything parents should have given to their children. And because of that, I appreciate all their love and effort to raise me and I believe that I wouldn't be who I am today if it weren't for them.

~~~~~~`~~~~~~`~~~~~~`~~~~~~

The story begins in the next chapter...

I hope you enjoy it and please let me know your thoughts about the characters and the story by posting your comments in the comments section. Thank you.

Love,

Jaycelle Anne Rodriguez

~~~Dreaming of a life, a happy ever after I couldn't imagine if it wouldn't with you. Each day is like a fairy tale come true. I wouldn't ask for more than being with you. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you, I do. With you, I wanna spend the rest of my life, baby, I do~~~

-Baby I do (Juris Fernandez)-

~~~~~~'~~~~~~`~~~~~~`~~~~~~

Wedding bells. Wedding bells.

I can hear the wedding bells ringing even though I was still inside the bridal car and it gave me different kinds of emotions, well, aside from...

Joy.

My grip on the bouquet in my hands tightened as I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Today is my wedding day but no matter how hard I tried to brush the sadness that I felt inside me, I still couldn't.

I should be happy. I should be celebrating because this is one of the most memorable things that can happen to a woman like me or should I say once in a lifetime celebration, but no because what I have in my heart right at this moment are sadness and uncertainty.

I don't know what will happen after this celebration and when we are left alone. At the same time, I also wonder what will happen if I jump into the now empty driver's seat and drive the car away from this chaos. But then I bit my lower lip, shook my head hard when I thought about my parents. I love them so much and I don't want to see them down.

"Rafi,"

I slightly gasped when Paul and Jace, my gay best friends knocked on the car window.

"Are you ready?" Paul asked me the moment I opened the door but the only response they got from me was a loud sigh and a long pout.

"Oh, my God! If you're having cold feet, I will support you! Come on, fasten your seat belt and I'll drive you away---ouch!"

"What the hell, Jace! What are you suggesting?" Paul glared at Jace as he slapped his arm causing him to wince.

"I was just asking her!" Jace replied with a shrug, rubbing the skin where Paul's hand landed. "Besides, this is just an arranged marriage, so it's up to her if she's going to walk into that church, marry the rudest man she has ever met in her life and soon become her husband--- if ever--- or fly away from here!"

I looked at Jace and suddenly I remember one of the quotes I read somewhere... arranged marriage is such a funny concept. All your life you are taught not to talk to strangers and suddenly you are asked to sleep with one.

"Haist! This is nonsense, Jace! You know how powerful her husband could be---"

"Husband to be!" Jace corrected and I chuckled.

"Wait--- girls! Stop it, I'm fine! You don't have to bicker over this thing! I mean, getting married is just a simple thing, duh!" I said rolling my eyes. Well, I had to interrupt them before their conversation turned into something serious. I know they both love me.

"Simple thing?" They both asked me in unison with their eyebrows almost forming a straight line. It's as if they couldn't believe I said those words where from the very beginning I kept telling them that 'marriage' is not my thing.

"I'm the one who's getting married, so you don't have to fight about this."

"Even if your 'husband to be' has anger issues and can swallow you at any time in the future?"

At that moment, I have to laugh at Jace's question... the word is that I have to... because I don't want to show them how hard this decision is for me.

"Come on, girls, yes, he's got anger issues but he's not a monster, is he? Besides, have you forgotten who I am? Hello, I'm Rafi Gonzalez and there is nothing I can handle!" I said proudly just to convince them.

And they agreed so they helped me out of the car and soon I found myself standing in front of the church double wooden door.

"Whew!" I let out the nervousness by taking a long, deep breath. My friends were already inside the church and here I am, waiting for the door to open.

And a few minutes later...

"Ohh..." I gasped when the door finally opened and the simple yet elegant interior came into my sight. Yes, this is just a forced marriage, but I have to admit that my in-laws put their extra efforts to decorate the church and of course, to make me look more gorgeous on my wedding day.

People were staring at me and I know, my husband who will be in a few minutes is doing the same, so I tried my best not to look at the altar, especially in his direction.

-'Huh! Yeah, keep on staring!'- I mumbled.

So, pretending to be happy, I started to make slow steps towards the altar.

The wedding singer started to sing the wedding song and I couldn't help but hiss the moment I heard it.

"🎶You're always on my mind since I've had this feeling. I found in you in a dream I've believed to be true...🎶"

-'Tss! You're always on my mind---I don't even know him!'-

"🎶Finally you got me fallin' like this, I don't wanna end a feeling like this...🎶"

I rolled my eyes. Well, I had the audacity to roll my eyes because I know no one can't see me. I have a veil covering my face.

"🎶You know I want to share my world with you, I promise to you my feelings will never change. You know I want to forever live in this moment, I wanna spend the rest of my life with you...I do...🎶"

I've already reached the altar and my parents have passed my hand to the coldest and rudest man I have ever known in my life... Liam Samuel Clarkson.

You wouldn't believe how I met this man. I didn't know that such an accident would turn into a 'disaster' and would end up meeting him at the altar.

I tried to smile at him, but like I said he's the coldest man I've ever met, so for sure you already knew that he didn't reciprocate that simple gesture.

"Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen..."

I heard the priest's greetings, but my mind was still on the man standing next to me who seemed as cold as ice.

-'Tss! I can't believe I'm marrying a zombie! If I just didn't love my parents, I wouldn't agree to this agreement!'-

I noticed that he looked at me too, but I continued to talk to myself as I stared at his handsome face.

-'I don't know what happened to you in the past as you turned into that, I mean, why did you develop such a behavior, but one thing is for sure, I will never let my guard down and even though this marriage is on papers only, still we are equal. I won't let you make life a living hell like what you showed two weeks ago. Never! As in never---'

But my mind went blank when he suddenly leaned forward.

"Can you stop staring at me and focus on what the priest is saying, dumbhead!" He said in a whisper but I still heard the hint of annoyance.

-'Huh! D-Did he just call me dumbhead?'- I blinked repeatedly as I looked at him in shock.

He then threw me a glare before looking back at the priest who was speaking in front of us.

-'Oh, my God! Help me, oh, dear God, please give me more strength to control myself and my fists so, we can continue this ceremony, argh!'-

I closed my eyes, clenching my fists tightly.

-'Yes, you are incredibly handsome but that good looks just don't suit your personality, jerk!'-

I made sure he saw how I raised my eyebrow at him.

After that, I tried to focus on what the priest was saying and when it comes to the moment where the groom and bride should seal their wedding ceremony with a kiss...

-'Oh, no... don't you ever kiss me on the lips, you, jerk! I don't want you to be my first kiss!'- I looked at him, slowly shaking my head and silently telling him what's in my head.

But he just gave me a devilish smile before cupping my face with his hands.

"No..." I whispered, my eyes were a pleading him.

That made him frown for a few seconds, but what I did, didn't actually help as he continued the opposite of what I was begging for. He pulled me closer to him and in the blink of an eye, his soft lips touched mine and I stiffened.

I felt him smirk in between his kiss, but much to my surprise, he pulled me around the waist and delved into what must have been a simple kiss.

We both heard the cheers from the guests inside the church who seemed to be enjoying the show in front of them... of course, who would not be when almost all of them had no idea what this wedding was.

I clutched his shoulder to make him stop, but he didn't budge and continued his assault on my poor lips. Yes, deep inside I enjoy it. I felt a sudden spark ignite all over my body when he pulled me, but my mind screamed before I completely lost my sanity. So yes, I probably would have enjoyed it if I hadn't known that he was just doing this for a show.

"Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Clarkson!" I heard the priest say and that's the time I pushed him, but not enough to get the attention of the guests.

I felt my face heated from annoyance and awkwardness at the same time as I looked at him and noticed the winning smile on his lips. It's as if he had won a lottery.

"You didn't tell me I'm your first kiss, sweetheart." He whispered, smirking

A small growl rumbled in my throat when he brushed my lips using his thumb.

"Tsk.Tsk. Don't be mad, sweetheart, it's just for a show." He whispered again, trying to suppress his laughter.

I raised an eyebrow.

"Well, I'm not mad, sweetheart," I smiled, sweetly. "I mean, why would I? At least I should be proud to say that my first kiss happened on my wedding day and the one who got it was none other than my husband." I shrugged, emphasizing the words first kiss and husband. "See? You are my first kiss, congratulations!"

A surprise was instantly written on his face, but it only took a few seconds for it to change into a scowl.

He then grabbed my hand and pulled me towards our family and...

...the show has begun...

~~~It's not the flowers wrapped in fancy paper, it's not the ring I wear around my finger. There's nothing in all the world I need when I have you here beside me, here beside me. So you could give me wings to fly and catch me if I fall or pull the stars down from the sky so I could wish on them all, but I couldn't ask for more 'cause your love is the greatest gift of all...~~~

-Your Love (Jim Brickman)

~~~~~~`~~~~~~`~~~~~~`~~~~~~

Ting... Ting... Ting...

That's the sound of the clinking glasses that made my jaws drop and hold my breath in discomfort. I looked around me and saw that almost everyone was doing the same thing. And do you know what that means? They just want us to kiss, I mean, me and my annoying husband who seemed to enjoy resting his palm on my lower back

-'Who the hell invented such a custom at the wedding reception? Seriously? I just hope they all know we were just pretending.'- I sighed mentally.

"Kiss... Kiss... Kiss..." They all screamed in unison.

And when I turned to my husband, the annoying smirk on his lips was the first that came before my eyes.

"Can't you hear their cheering? They want us to kiss."

"Huh!" I snorted, but just like what happened earlier in the church, I didn't get the chance to form any words as he suddenly pulled me closer to him and kissed me. And when I thought it was just a simple kiss like what I thought earlier, well, I was wrong for the second time as he didn't let my lips go immediately

My body seemed to enjoy his assault. I can feel the tingling sensation in the pit of my stomach and all of a sudden, I found myself reciprocating the movement of his lips. I sensed how it surprised him but he didn't stop, instead, he pulled me even closer and deepened the kiss.

I don't know how long we have been in that position, the only thing that pulled me back to my sanity was when I recognized Jace's voice near us.

"Get a room you two!" He yelled, followed by loud applause from the other guests.

That was just when I pushed him, but instead of being embarrassed, he had the arrogance to raise his wine and ask the people for a toss.

"Cheers, sweetheart, cheers everyone," he smirked before drinking the remaining contents in his wineglass.

"Wow! You seem to be enjoying all of this, sweetheart," I whispered, sarcastically close to his ear. "You seem to be enjoying kissing your wife tonight, huh? Remember, it's just for a show," and then I gazed up at him, he has the same expression as mine.

"Of course, it's just for a show, besides..." He pulled me around my waist. "You're not my type!" And he whispered an inch from my lips that I smelled his minty breath mixed with the scent of wine he drank.

Then he let my waist go and because I was hit by his words, a stupid idea came to my mind that made him suddenly change his expression for the rest of the night.

"Ohh, of course, I know that," I shrugged, pretending to be okay despite the twinge that crept into my heart. "But don't consume too much of my energy tonight, especially my lips... let others try it too."

Those words came out of my mouth without even thinking about it. I was just teasing him just like what he was doing, but it changed his mood and the atmosphere between us.

"Listen here! I'm warning you, Rafi, don't you ever try to disgust my name or even think of having an affair or I won't hesitate---" he stopped in the middle of his sentence, gritting his teeth.

"You won't hesitate to what?" I asked, despite the rage showing in his eyes.

"I won't hesitate to put you and your other man in the right place that I'm sure no one would ever want even you!"

After releasing those words, he walked away without even looking back and totally left the venue. And there, I was left confused and speechless.

"What happened? Why did he suddenly leave?" Jace instantly came to my side, but my mind was busy with its own thoughts.

"What the hell had happened to him?" Paul also ran to me and asked. "What did you talk about? He seemed so furious."

-'Yeah, what the hell had suddenly happened to him? I thought we were just exchanging sarcastic comments then why did he walk out?'- I asked myself not realizing that I had asked those questions loud enough for the two to hear.

"You were what?" The two asked in unison but I was still in a daze.

-'Why do I feel like he seemed jealous than furious? Or is it just my mind thinking? Because in the first place, why would he get jealous when the exact words came out of his mouth? I am not his type!'-

"Rafaela!"

"Rafi!"

"Huh?" I suddenly came back to reality when my parents and in-laws came in front of me.

"What happened, sweetie?" Asked by my mother-in-law, the worry was evident in her voice. "Are you okay?"

"Y-Yeah," I nodded, not knowing what to answer.

They all asked me one by one... no... actually, they all asked me at the same time.

"Why did your husband leave?" It was my mother, who took both my hands and turned me towards her.

"I-I don't know," I shrugged, shaking my head. "Honestly, I don't know,"

"You can take rest, for now, Rafi, and I'll be the one to talk to that jackass!" Mr. Vincent Clarkson patted me on the shoulder. He's Liam's grandfather... the reason behind all of this and why we ended up tying each other in front of the altar.

I felt a pair of arms embrace me from behind and I know from the warmth it brought me those were my mother's.

"I'm sorry, honey,"

I immediately turned around and took both her hands with a smile.

"Mom, why are you apologizing?"

"Because we didn't stop you from agreeing to this marriage. I'm sorry if you had to go through it because of your father's property---"

"Hey, Mom..." I interrupted her, wiping her tears. "We are family, so it is our property," I emphasized that the word our.

The property she was mentioning was our house and the 20 thousand square meter lot where our house is located and which the title of the said property was used as collateral when my grandfather, Robert Rodriguez borrowed a huge amount of money from Liam's grandfather when he was still alive. And that money worth 30 million dollars and the friendship of our grandfathers made everything happen.

She pulled me into a hug and I thanked God that it's just an intimate wedding... only the two families and a few close friends were invited. My in-laws hired four private photographers to capture all the details and since this happened, we don't have to worry about what the media would say about this chaos, especially about their reputation.

***

The moment I got into the car, tears started forming around my eyes. This is me again. This has been me from the beginning pretending to be strong in front of everyone, especially in front of my parents... forcing myself to smile and pretending to be happy.

I admit I was hurt when Liam walked out and left me speechless earlier. Even though it's just an arranged marriage, he still made me feel what a real wife should feel in his every kiss. But what made me confused even up to this point was his reaction when I told him to don't consume my energy and let others try to kiss me too. It was just a joke and we were just exchanging sarcastic comments, but why did he walk out like a furious and jealous husband?

"Ma'am Rafi,"

"Hmm?" I looked in the rearview mirror when I heard Bob's voice. He said he was the one Liam assigned to be my personal driver. And even though I'm not used to having a personal driver as I always drive my own, I have no choice but to agree since I didn't know where his house in.

"We're here," he smiled at me and I nodded, returning his smile.

-'Whoa!'- but a slight gasp escaped my lips when a three-story villa came right before my eyes.

We entered a huge black gate with four security guards complete with rifles and other equipment that can be used for killing

unauthorized people entering the premises --- Oops! I mean, it can be used to kill birds, flies, ants... ohh, and other poor insects.

Bob helped me with my things. Actually, I only have two large suitcases as I didn't pack all my stuff and kept them in my apartment with Paul and Jace. Yes, we were sharing an apartment before Liam told me three days before the wedding that I should pack my things and start living with him.

"Good evening, Mrs. Clarkson," I was greeted by the maid who opened the entrance door. She was smiling widely as she approached me.

"Oh, hi, good evening," I greeted her back.

"Oh, my God! You are so beautiful, Mrs. Clarkson!"

I couldn't help but chuckle at her reaction when she stood in front of me, covering her mouth in surprise. I haven't washed my face yet since earlier at the reception, so I still have my makeup on.

"You can just call me, Rafi, Mrs. Clarkson is a way too old." I winked at her.

"Oops, I forgot to introduce myself, by the way, I'm Jenny, Mrs. Clarkson----I mean, Rafi." She smiled but then suddenly stopped in her tracks and stared at me, frowning.

"Why? Is there dirt on my face?" I asked confused.

"No," she shook her head. "You just looked familiar,"

"Maybe because I have a common beauty," I shrugged, smiling at her. I remember that's the same reaction I got when Liam's grandfather first met me.

"I'm not sure but I think I've seen you somewhere before."

"Really?" I asked and she nodded. "I'll tell you why in some other day," I just told her.

She excitedly agreed and helped me bring my things inside the house.

"Huh!" My mouth hung in mid-air as soon as my feet entered the huge living room. "Whoa!" I uttered in surprise as it is double the size of our apartment, take note it's just a living room.

I wandered my eyes around and let them please with the spacious modern living room with light wood and linen upholstery. Illuminated by a cacophony of circular pendants and designer table lamps that added elegance and sophistication to the room.

"You would want to close your mouth,"

My breath hitched at the sound of his voice and I turned around to see him walking down the huge and wide staircase... the Greek God himself and my husband, Liam Samuel Clarkson who left me at the reception on our wedding day. Well... it's just an arranged marriage, so what do I expect?