Trapped in My Ex's Love

"Is that it? That's the reason you're breaking up with me? Just because you're tired of me? What kind of joke is that, huh!"

"Yes, I'm tired of you. Besides, from the beginning, didn't you know you were only my outlet? Come on, don't be hypocritical. We're still young, and the love we feel is nothing more than puppy love. We don't even know if we would last. Our love is just recklessness and fleeting emotion. There is no sincere love between us."

'Every word he said felt like a blade slicing my heart. I loved you wholeheartedly, but you saw it only as childish impulse and momentary emotion. Bintang, whatever happens to me now, I will blame you for it in the future. If we meet again someday, you'll have to pay for this. Pray we never cross paths again.'

**

Moans echoed through the large room; there were no partitions, the bed, kitchen, and living area sharing the same open space though separated by distance. Only the bathroom had a divider and a door.

"El, you're amazing." The French woman's voice sounded deep and sultry.

"I'm always amazing, Baby," the man replied as he thrust into the woman beneath him. His body was bare, and on his right shoulder was a tattoo of a single star.

He kept moving without pause. He always sought physical pleasure whenever painful memories from the past resurfaced.

Switching partners was nothing new to him whenever boredom struck. Yes, boredom-the very word that had driven Langit Eldar Abimand into madness until he became a notorious playboy. With his good looks and wealth, he dated more than one woman at a time. No one knew how many women had shared his bed whenever he desired. And all of them were willing, captivated by Eldar, the Indonesian man.

The two of them moved in rhythm, their moans filling the room. Time didn't matter as long as their burning desire could be extinguished.

**

Sunlight began to seep into the room. El was still fast asleep, exhausted from the night he spent with his date, Stevani. Even as the sunlight grew brighter, the pair lost in their dreams remained asleep.

Stevani clung to El's bare chest as she slept in bright red lingerie. She used his arm as a pillow, her other arm wrapped around him.

Meanwhile, a woman walked gracefully down the corridor of El's apartment building. One hand held a branded bag, the other swung lightly with her confident steps. She smiled once she stood before his apartment door and pressed the combination to unlock it.

The woman with shoulder-length hair turned the handle after hearing the confirmation sound. She stepped inside to look for El but froze at the sight before her. Bras, panties, women's clothing, and even bottles of alcohol were scattered across the floor and table. She clenched her fists and walked farther inside-only to be struck by a more heartbreaking scene.

"El! Langit!" She shouted in frustration.

**

"I'll call you later," Langit said to the woman who had just spent the night with him.

"Okay, El. I'll wait," the French woman replied, even blowing him a kiss despite the presence of another person.

Joya-Langit's mother-stared at her son, her chest tight. Her beloved, successful son now slept with random women. Her trip to France to visit the son who hadn't returned to Indonesia in years left her shocked to see him in bed with someone who wasn't his wife.

Stevani walked past Joya and offered a small smile, but it was met with a sharp, freezing glare from the nearly sixty-year-old woman.

Langit casually got out of bed, put on a satin robe, and walked toward his mother, whom he adored.

"Why didn't you call me first if you were coming? If you had called, I would've picked you up at the airport," he said calmly, leaning in to kiss her cheek, but she pulled away.

Joya was furious-her once polite, obedient son had turned reckless, even sleeping around.

Langit was taken aback when she avoided him, but he tried to smile, understanding she must be shocked.

"Since when did you become like this, El? Is this why you refuse to come home? Because you enjoy casual sex?" Joya asked with deep disappointment.

Langit smiled slightly. "Not exactly."

The nearly twenty-five-year-old man walked past her into the kitchen.

"El, why have you become like this?" Joya's voice trembled, tears pooling as she struggled to accept what her son had become.

"Nothing's wrong. I'm having fun," Langit replied casually as he turned on the kettle. He intended to make his mother something to drink.

"How are you and Daddy?" he asked, trying to shift the topic away from himself.

Eight long years-he had left Indonesia eight years ago and never returned, even though his mother begged him countless times.

"Don't change the subject, El! I'm shocked to see you like this. The lifestyle here isn't good for you. I want you to come back to Indonesia. I don't want you dumping your seeds into random women's ponds," Joya scolded, horrified by his wild behavior.

Langit laughed. He made her some tea, placed it on the table, and gestured for her to sit.

"Not random ponds, Mom. They're all carefully selected and high-quality," he said casually-causing Joya's blood pressure to spike.

"El!" she snapped, anger bursting out of her. Her chest rose and fell heavily, her head throbbing from his nonsense.

"'Them'? You actually sleep with more than one woman?" Joya's anger only grew.

Langit chuckled and rested his head on her lap, closing his eyes with his arms folded across his chest. He hadn't been this affectionate with her in ages.

"We're just having fun, Mom. No seeds wasted in random ponds," he said almost guiltlessly, despite her rising blood pressure.

"How can you say nothing's wasted when you've been with more than one woman? El, why have you become like this, Sweetheart?" Joya looked down sadly at her son.

Langit smiled with his eyes still closed, then replied,

"They're contained, Mom. So later they go into the trash."

"You can't throw your precious seeds into the trash either!" Joya grew even more upset.

Langit opened his eyes, noticing her rising anger. He sat up to face her.

"Putting them in ponds is wrong, throwing them away is wrong-so what am I supposed to do, Mom? Should I put them in the pond and give you a grandchild?" he teased instead of comforting her.

"El! You're going to give me a stroke!" Joya's voice shook, her chest rising and falling in frustration.

Langit laughed again, then lay back down on her lap, this time on his side.

"Mom, did you come here just to scold me? I missed you," he said sweetly.

His words made Joya feel guilty. She had come because she missed him, but seeing his lifestyle had enraged her.

"I missed you too. Please come home, El. Mommy is getting old. If something happens to me and you're not there, won't you regret not seeing me one last time?"

Langit exhaled sharply. "Mommy and Daddy should move here. It's the same, isn't it?"

Returning to Indonesia was the one thing he avoided.

"No, you're the one who needs to come home," Joya insisted. "You're afraid of seeing her, aren't you? You're a man, El. If you dare sleep with so many women, you should have the courage to face your own problems. Stop running away." She gently stroked his hair.

Langit fell silent. She was right-he was running. Running from the reality of facing the girl he once loved deeply, who had shattered his heart.

'I tried to forget her, but she keeps appearing every night, making it impossible for me to erase her name from my heart.'

'As I stepped out of the place that had always made me feel safe, I refused to lift my head. I didn't want to raise my face, nor did I want to see how bright that day was. It wasn't that I didn't wish to see the beauty of the world, but I was running from the truth-that I had broken the heart of the young man I loved. I couldn't even look at the sky because it reminded me of him. I was a star who had betrayed the sky by refusing to stay with him and gaze upon him.'

"Mrs. Bintang."

A staff member hurried toward the young woman who had already reached the front lobby.

The shoulder-length-haired woman turned. Bintang was the marketing director at her father's company. She stopped walking and waited for her staff to catch up.

"Your umbrella, Ma'am." The staff handed her a folding umbrella.

"Oh, right. I almost forgot," Bintang said with a faint smile.

The staff gave her the umbrella, then handed over the documents she had also left behind.

"This too, Ma'am. Good thing you hadn't left yet."

Bintang took the folder of documents, closing her eyes briefly and shaking her head at her carelessness for forgetting something so important.

"Thank you. I almost left it behind, even though these are important documents," she said gratefully.

"You're welcome, Ma'am."

Bintang excused herself because she had to meet a client. It had been a year since she began working at her father's company as the marketing director, thanks to her ability to interact well with people and attract investors for her family's banking business.

She opened her folding umbrella and walked beneath it, shielding herself from the blazing sun and from the sight of the sky.

'I keep trying not to think about you, because I know the mistake I made hurt you and wounded you deeply. I avoid everything because I'm aware I'm no longer worthy of seeing you-my lips aren't even worthy of speaking your name.'

**

"Your favorite, hot chocolate."

A cup of hot chocolate was placed on the table, the steam rising with an aroma that teased the senses.

"Thank you," Bintang said with a wide smile, looking at Anta who still stood after setting down the drink.

Anta sat across from Bintang, meeting his cousin who came for their usual lunch at his café.

After graduating college, Anta had been more interested in growing the family business than working at his grandfather's company. He preferred dealing with cups, food ingredients, and everything in between, rather than stacks of paperwork.

"Just finished meeting a client?" Anta guessed.

"Yes. Thankfully, everything went smoothly," Bintang replied before sipping her hot chocolate.

"Slow down," Anta said as she burned her tongue.

He grabbed a tissue and handed it to her. Bintang took it and wiped her lips.

"Thank you," she said after wiping her mouth.

"Bin, you could ask your staff to meet clients. Why do you always go yourself?" Anta asked, puzzled. His cousin was a director, yet she always handled everything personally.

"I could ask my staff to take care of it, but I'm building trust, Ta. This way, clients will believe in us and won't have doubts, because I, as the director, handle it myself," Bintang explained.

Anta kept watching her. She was still the same as before-hardworking and naturally good with people. But he felt something had changed. She no longer smiled warmly and sincerely like she used to. All that remained was the forced smile she showed to make others comfortable, even when she wasn't.

"Eight years have passed so quickly. Back then, all we knew was playing and studying, and now here we are managing our family businesses," Anta said while looking outside the café.

Although he said they played a lot, that wasn't true for Bintang.

"Well ... isn't that what we studied for?" Bintang replied. She picked up her cup again, blew on the rising steam, and took a slow sip.

Anta turned his gaze from the window back to Bintang. He watched his cousin who appeared cheerful but carried immeasurable pain inside.

"Bin, what's your goal for the future?" Anta asked.

Bintang paused, the cup stopping midway. She seemed to think, then looked at him. A goal-did she even have one? And if she did, could she ever achieve it?

"I'm not sure. I don't know. All I know is that right now, I'm just living what I can live," she answered with a small smile.

Anta continued to observe her, and out of playful curiosity he asked, "If Langit suddenly came back and stood in front of you, would you meet him?"

The question made Bintang's heart race. She looked at him with an expression that couldn't be described. Langit-the name she had never spoken again. If they were to meet, would he even want to talk to her? She remembered the pain in his eyes eight years ago. After so many years, would he be willing to speak to her again?

"Let's not talk about that. You know how things were between us. And besides, it's been eight years, Ta. I'm not sure he even remembers me," she replied with a bitter smile.

Anta watched her closely. Yes, eight years had passed, but he was certain Bintang still loved Langit just as much as she did before they parted.

'I'm too ashamed to face him. It was my fault for carving that wound into his heart. If fate were to bring us together again, I'm not even sure he would want to recognize me. Truly, if I'm allowed to hope, then I hope not to meet him. I'm too much of a coward to take responsibility for what I've done.'

"El, come home with me," Joya kept coaxing her son, hoping he would return to Indonesia with her.

"No, Mom. I prefer staying here," Langit refused for the umpteenth time.

He was already dressed neatly, preparing to leave for work. Langit worked at Magnifique's main headquarters in Paris.

"I don't care what you say. I'll ask them to fire you so you'll be forced to return to Indonesia!" Joya threatened, having run out of ways to persuade him.

Langit had lived in that country far too long. Because of a heartbreak, he had left the place he was born, running away from his past.

He looked at his mother-frustrated, desperate-before cupping her face and smiling gently at the woman who had given birth to him.

"Mom, I'm really not ready to go back. Please don't force me," Langit pleaded, then kissed her forehead.

Joya froze. She still didn't fully understand what had happened eight years ago that made Langit insist on transferring schools even though exams were near. She had been threatened that if she didn't transfer him, he would never continue his studies. And without hesitation, Langit demanded to move abroad.

Langit left for work, leaving Joya alone in the apartment. She could only keep searching for ways to bring her son home.

**

Langit tried working as usual, but his focus was shattered by his mother's constant pleas for him to return.

"Why do you look distracted today?" one of his coworkers asked in English.

"Nothing. I'm just a bit tired," Langit replied with a thin smile.

His coworker glanced around, then looked at Langit as he resumed typing.

"El, do you have time tonight? How about we grab a drink?" the tall, beautiful woman asked.

Everyone knew about Langit's reputation-how he slept with many women, some of whom even offered themselves just to see what he was like in bed.

Langit went silent at her invitation, then answered, "Alright. After work."

She smiled, cleared her throat lightly, and walked away.

He actually didn't want to go, but the thought of hearing Joya's nagging again made him accept the offer.

**

In Indonesia, nighttime had arrived as Bintang returned from work. She stepped out of her car, entered the house, and was greeted by the warm voice that always soothed her heart.

"You're home? Want me to make you hot chocolate or something else?" Annetha asked when she saw Bintang come in.

Bintang placed her blazer on the back of the sofa and walked to the dining room, where Annetha was preparing dinner.

"What did you cook?" Bintang asked, eyeing the dishes one by one.

"Beef stew, just for you as usual," Annetha replied while glancing at her daughter.

Bintang smiled broadly and kissed her mother's cheek.

"I'm going to shower first, Mom. Hot chocolate sounds good," she said before leaving the dining room.

Annetha smiled, relieved to see her daughter looking cheerful and carefree. She had worried that Bintang might be stressed and that it would affect her health. She and her husband had done everything to keep her mentally well.

Bintang entered her room-now drastically different. Her old study desk had been replaced by a vanity full of makeup. The pink walls were now a soft nude tone, matching the new version of herself. The origami stars that once hung by the window had vanished.

She undressed, preparing to shower, when thunder suddenly boomed. The already-dark sky grew even darker as black clouds rolled in.

Bintang walked to the window, staring at the sky now hidden by storm clouds. That bleak night reminded her of the night she broke a young man's heart-along with her own.

"Langit, how are you? If we ever meet again, could you forgive me?"

The words slipped from her lips without command. Though she feared meeting him, she couldn't deny the wish to free herself from eight years of guilt.

Everyone thought she was doing fine, but she had spent all these years burying pain and regret. Sometimes she wondered why she had been so cruel-why she had crushed the heart of the boy she had loved so deeply.

**

Paris, France.

Langit went to a club with the woman who had invited him. They sat at the bar and ordered drinks. They toasted and downed several glasses.

"You refused to date me. I'm surprised you agreed to drink with me, El. I thought you were avoiding me," she said after finishing her drink.

"I just don't want any kind of attachment. If you want to go out with me, it's a no-strings-attached date. Even sleeping together would be voluntary, with no commitment," Langit replied casually, sipping the brown liquid in his crystal glass.

The woman swirled her drink, her eyes fixed on him.

Noticing her gaze, Langit set his glass down and leaned slightly closer.

She studied his face intently. His friends were right-Langit was exceptionally attractive, with a charm that made women fall at his feet.

"Want to take things further?" Langit asked, his voice low.

"If you want to, I don't mind," she answered with a seductive smile.

Meanwhile, Joya grew anxious. Langit hadn't returned home, and work had ended an hour ago. She tried calling him, but he didn't answer.

"Where is he?" Joya paced in worry, imagining the worst-especially if Langit was fooling around again.

"No, I can't let this continue. I have to find a way to bring him back to Indonesia."

She thought hard. She couldn't let her son's future be destroyed by the nightlife of that city.

**

Langit went to the woman's apartment. They had drunk a lot and decided to go to her place to do what they had implied at the club.

"You live alone, right?" Langit asked as they entered.

"Yes. If I didn't, I'd have taken you to a hotel instead," she replied, setting her bag on the sofa.

She turned toward him, slipping off her blazer in a sensual motion.

"Do you want to shower first, or ...." she teased, letting her words trail off for him to choose.

"I can do things in any condition," Langit said. He pulled her by the waist, closing the distance between them.

"Even if you want to do it in the shower, I can," he added.

She smiled, wrapped her arms around him, and pressed her lips to his. Their mouths moved together, deep and hungry.

They walked slowly, lips still locked, until they reached the bedroom.