The orphan from the Moonvalley's Manes

The shrill wind that blows through the open bedroom window of the double-storey Moorish dwelling pushes the girl's long, copper-red hair over her narrow face. However, she doesn't even feel it; she is barely aware of the cold that penetrates her clothes and makes her body shiver slightly.

Through her tears, she also doesn't notice the red edge of the sun far beyond the dark hills. At this moment, she is only aware of the deep, bottomless sadness that runs through her mind.

She just knows it's all over and that nothing she does or says will change it.

She'll just have to accept it - and try never to think about the things that have happened.

But how does one forget something that has been a part of your existence for more than twenty-three years?

Stella shuddered noticeably and swallowed hard at the tears rising in her throat.

Barely three weeks ago, she would never have dreamed that her guardian father would no longer be here today and that she would finally have to leave Bacdrane before the end of the week.

The sun slips away behind the misty hills and its soft light touches the high treetops for the last time. There are cumulus clouds in the west, and it looks like they can expect a cold, unpleasant winter night.

She touches the velvet curtain material with her fingers and wonders for the umpteenth time why her father never told her about his debt. If he had only mentioned it to her, then she would have been able to prepare herself for it.

The first she heard about it, however, was when beta Vaughn came to read the will to her this afternoon.

Accordingly, all of omega Ayden's possessions must be sold to pay off his debts to alpha Duncan. She still remembers how pale and tense beta Vaughn was, as he sat across from her on the couch. It must have been a difficult task for him, because he and her father had been close friends for years.

Only after it was all over, did beta Vaughn call her aside and say encouragingly, "I know it's been hard for you Stella, but your father did everything he could, as an omega to fulfil his obligations. Please remember that your car, personal belongings, or gifts you got from your father are not affected by this. He made a complete list of it, and you can take it with you."

She was still too stunned to listen properly and just said dully: "But why must the house and all dads' other belongings be sold? It doesn't mean he is totally worthless because he was an omega."

"Eight months ago, your father offered his house and other assets as security to get a loan from Alpha Duncan. I tried to persuade him from not doing it, but he was convinced that he would be able to pay it back."

Stella turned her face away.

"He worked for more than thirty years to be able to do everything possible for the rejected half-blood orphaned pups. How could one expect him to just leave them to the mercy of the rogues, after their families rejected them."

Beta Vaughn nodded.

"These may sound like heartless words to you Stella, but your father tried the impossible. I'm just sorry that you now have to bear the consequences."

She made a light hand gesture.

"It doesn't matter; I just feel sad that everything has to end in such a way. Dad didn't deserve it!"

Stella was half startled by the impassioned sound of her voice and she was aware that some of the other pack members who were there for her father's funeral were staring at her curiously.

This made her realize for the first time that some of them did not like her and she secretly felt happy that she had not inherited anything from her father.

But she couldn't care less what they thought. She certainly wasn't going to let them upset her either.

At that moment she only longed for her chosen mate, Ivan; wished he was with her with his cheerful, bubbly nature to encourage her. He would have understood how she felt that she was not upset about the inheritance, but about the humiliating circumstances under which it happened.

Ivan doesn't care that she didn't shift yet. She herself is still not sure if she is a wolf, a half-breed or human. All the others shift at eighteen. She was only two years old when Den Mother Tashia found her on the mountains and brought her to omega Ayden.

But Ivan wasn't there, and she had to go through this ordeal alone!

Behind her, her bedroom door opened softly. She heard it, but didn't turn around, just stood there with her head slightly down and her gaze fixed somewhere on the horizon.

Soft shuffling footsteps approached over the thick carpet, stuck behind her and for moments only the heavy breathing of the den mother could be heard.

"Stella..."

She wiped the hair from her face with her hand.

"Yes, Mother Tashia?" she asked without turning around.

"Alpha Paul from the Moonvalley's Manes called and said he'll be here tonight at nine o'clock to speak to you."

It's like life suddenly comes into Stella. She drew in her breath and turned around rather quickly.

"Alpha Paul? But... but what is he doing here? I didn't know he was in Bacdrane?"

The older woman hesitated for a moment.

"He didn't say anything, but maybe he just wants to come and talk about his horses."

Stella swallowed hard before she managed to whisper: "Then I want to take a bath and change into another dress."

Tashia's cheeks suddenly began to tremble, she sniffed loudly and then stammered: "You must try to be strong, my child. Maybe Alpha Paul can still help you keep some of your father's horses."

"Well, Mother Tashia, I'll never allow it - I'm not going to humiliate myself to take advantage of father's friends. They'd better sell the horses too; I don't want anything to do with it anymore... "

Her father was friends with many Alphas from different packs. He was almost thrown out by the Gray Claws because of this, but because he opened his doors to the rejected pups of all packs, Alpha Duncan let him stay. He believed that some of the pups might be true mates of his pack members and he could grow his pack that way.

"And then what about Irish Wind? You always loved the stallion so much."

Stella bit her bottom lip and looked away. She always dreamed of one day running free with him as a wolf.

"It doesn't matter Mother Tashia; I haven't seen Irish Wind that often lately and it might as well be if I never see him again."

The den mother suddenly started crying and buried her face in her hands.

"It's all terrible!" she sobbed. "I was your father's den mother for more than eighteen years and now I have to find another place to live. I can't just leave you to your own fate!"

Stella walked forward and placed her hand on the older woman's arm.

"Well, Mother Tashia, I know how you must feel, but I've already decided to ask you to move with me to my apartment... I know it won't be the same as here on Bacdrane, but there at least you won't have to work so hard!" She almost manages to sound enthusiastic.

Tashia hastily dried her tears.

"Do you really mean it Stella?" she asked with open surprise.

"Of course, Mother Tashia!"

A little while later, Stella walked down the hall in the direction of the spacious marble-tiled bathroom. She didn't know why, but every time she had to deal with Alpha Paul, she was tense and unsure of herself. Yet he never gave her any reason to feel that way, because in the almost two years she had known him, he had only ever come here to talk about the pups and horses with her father.

He was probably never aware that she secretly loved him, otherwise he might have acted a little differently towards her.

Stella sighed slightly.

Maybe it's good that he never knew that, because after her acquaintance with warrior Ivan, she knew that her feeling for Alpha Paul was nothing but infatuation. He enchanted her with his strong personality, handsome looks, and her unattainable imagination.

When he was here, she enjoyed watching him from a distance and listening to his calm, deep voice. More than once she couldn't help but get the feeling that his mind wasn't on the things he and her father were talking about and then she wondered who that veiled world belonged to - maybe a she-wolf, or even his true mate which no one knows about.

The thought that there could possibly be someone in his life upset her that she couldn't bear to spend too much time in his presence. What chance did she stand anyway, she who doesn't even know what she is.

The last time she had anything to do with Alpha Paul was after Irish Wind won the Autumn Handicap. He was very excited that night and told her father that Irish Wind was only now beginning to show what was really in him. Father also spoiled all the pups with a barbecue that night.

Stella still remembers how her father thought thoughtfully.

"Maybe you're right, Alpha Paul, although I still have my reservations about him as a racehorse. I only bought him for breeding purposes and for the pups to ride. He's so small in stature that it wouldn't surprise me if he didn't make it on the tough grass lanes we've got here. Only time will tell if I may have made a bad investment." He paused for a moment, looked at Stella, then half-laughingly added, "I probably would never have bought Irish Wind if my daughter hadn't been raving about him."

She could see her father winking in Alpha Paul's direction and it made her blush uncomfortably. Finally, she said with a nonchalant shake of her head: "Well, if Irish Wind won the Grand National one day, father is going to retract those words and admit that my judgment is not as poor as father thinks!"

And now... now her father is no longer here, and she will never be able to prove to him that she was right about Irish Wind. Besides, she also has no say over the pups, Alpha Duncan has come to claim them all. Nor will she even be able to prove to Alpha Paul that she was right, because Irish Wind is getting sold on Friday and Stella knows with unwavering certainty that she will never see the horse again.

While filling the bathtub, Stella tries in vain to find an explanation for Alpha Paul's unexpected visit. He was not here for the funeral this afternoon and she wonders if he already knows what the real situation is here.

Time passes slowly and although Stella has resolved not to think about her problems again, she just can't shake the tormenting thoughts. She continues to wander restlessly and tensely around the house without finding anything to occupy her with. Later she goes outside. It is already dark, and a cold wind blows from the south and carries the howls of the wolves guarding the borders.

She put her hands in the pockets of her parka. Her red hair is covered under a cuddly woollen beanie so that only her slender face, slightly tipped nose and long eyelashes are visible.

In the grey darkness, the garden looks solitary and bare, the grass is dead from the frost and the deciduous trees sit black and dark above her.

At the bottom of the vast garden, she stops and looks back at the Moorish house with its high, white walls, curved window frames and open porch under the black tar beams.

Mother Tashia is probably now setting the table and in the living room the charcoal fire is glowing cosy by then. Still, she doesn't want to go there now, because it will just rip open all the memories. Barely a week ago, she and her father sat in front of the hearth, each with a glass of semi-sweet wine in hand, and they talked about Ivan's chances of getting the job as trainer.

She sighed audibly. It's not just her father who is gone, but in a few days, she won't even be staying here anymore. At least she has a small amount of savings in the bank and a few paintings that she bought in recent years and then at least there is also her old car. Furthermore, she only has her clothes and personal belongings that she will be able to take with her. That's all. She must give up the pups, the pack and the beautiful house where she wanted to do her first shift. She shook her head and realized she would have to accept that she might not be a wolf.

The wind blows stronger and somewhere above her the branches crack.

Stella doesn't know if she's looking forward to Alpha Paul's arrival or if she's afraid. He will naturally want to talk to her about the horses and discuss the future. How will she be able to communicate all the time while she is aware of the dark cloud hanging over her head?

The clock in the lobby had just struck nine when Alpha Paul made his appearance.

Stella, was flipping through a magazine in the living room, heard how Mother Tashia welcomed him at the front door and her gaze briefly wandered around the room to see if everything was tidy. There is not a thing out of place and Mother Tashia has made sure everything is tidy.

Stella took a breath. She cannot understand why she is so nervous.

If there is anyone who knows how she must feel today, it is Mother Tashia, because over the years she was not only a good Den Mother but was like her own mother, confidant, comrade and someone she looked up to.

Voices are suddenly heard in the corridor and the next moment the door opens.

"Alpha Paul is here miss Stella." She announced formally and stood aside. Her head bowed, out of respect for Alpha Paul. I can't help but smile. Alpha Paul is the only Alpha who gets that type of respect from her. Usually, she disappears when the other Alphas come and visit. I felt my stomach tighten as he extended his hand to me in greeting. Alphas just don't do that. Does this mean that he also no longer considers her part of a wolf pack, and only as an ordinary human?

"Hello Stella." His handshake is quick, and he shoves his hands in his pockets. There is a slight frown on his face, but it is quickly replaced with a slight smile. "I hope you don't mind me arriving here so untimely, but I had to come to Bacdrane today and thought I'd come and offer my condolences."

"Evening Alpha Paul. No, you're not late at all. Sit down." She turned to Tashia. "Will mother prepare something for Alpha Paul for dinner please." Maybe it will keep him here a little longer, even if she feels as nervous as a schoolgirl standing in front of the headmaster, at least she won't feel so alone.

Before Tashia can answer her, Paul says: "It's not necessary at all, Stella, I've already had dinner - thanks Tashia."

Stella felt a lonely pinch in her chest and just nodded. It's just another proof of rejection by the wolves. With a last hope she still tries.

"Oh, but then Alpha will probably drink a cup of coffee with me?" Paul saw the anguish and desperation in her eyes. He would like to hold her and tell her that everything will be ok, but he dares not.

"That would be lovely, thank you. Please call me Paul." He notices the sadness taking over her whole body, and he frowns.

There it is, he doesn't see her as wolve anymore. Stella feels the abandonment struck her like a sword in her heart. She bravely forces a smile.

Only when they are all alone does Paul take a seat. There is a short, almost palpable silence in which only the faint calls of the border patrols can be heard.

Paul leans back a little in his easy chair. He needs to make the space between them a little bigger. She is only human, and he has already mentioned to Daphne that he is considering her as his chosen mate. He is already thirty and no matter how much he wants the Goddess to send him his chosen mate he had no luck so far.

"It's probably quiet here in the house without the pups."

Stella looked up with a lost lonely look in her eyes.

"Yes, it is, and I think I'm going to miss dad for a very long time. Life will never be the same for me."

Paul must use all his self-control not to wrap her in his arms.

"I know how you must feel, because losing someone who was so close to you is the most bitter experience a person can go through."

The way he says it sends a strange sensation through Stella's insides.

"My chosen mate who was also my friend from childhood, she passed away two weeks before her Luna ceremony." There is pain in his eye.

It is if Stella sees Paul for the first time. He looked away at the painting of her hanging on the wall. Around his handsome mouth was an expression she has not seen before; A curl of black hair hangs over his forehead, and she only now notices that he is starting to turn grey near his temples. She wants to reach out and let his head rest on her chest, but she knows that would be a big mistake.

It surprises her so much that she can't immediately think of anything to say.

"I'm sorry to hear that . . . My father never told me about it."

He looked at her with longing in his eyes. "I don't believe I ever spoke to him about it. It happened before I even met your father."

This confession of Paul is a surprise. She was always under the impression that he and her father were confidants who had no secrets from each other. But now, it's probably not something you talk about with an Omega."

"Was it an accident?"

"No, the Rouges ambushed her in the forest during her run."

Before Stella can stop herself, she gasps for breath and exclaims, "Oh, that must have been a tremendous shock!"

"It was, yes, but fortunately time brings relieve, and one learns to accept..." Paul looked at the painting again. Goddess must have had punished him for not waiting for his true mate.

Tashia appears with the coffee. Tashia glanced at Stella and winked slyly.

When they were finally alone again, she saw Paul's eyes on the painting of hers again, she got a pinch in her stomach and frowned. He felt her eyes on him and looked at her. His voice is soft.

"Stella, it doesn't matter what your circumstances are, I want you to know, if you ever need help you are welcome to come to me. My door and my pack's door will always be open to you. " The tone of his voice and the look in his eyes make her feel like an emotional wreck, yet safe. He doesn't reject her because she's just a human! A tear rolled down her cheek.

It takes a few moments before Stella can answer him.

"Then . . . then does Alpha know about the auction being held on Friday?" her voice barely audible.

He nodded.

"Yes, I am aware of that, and I also know that you need to move away from Bacdrane because you are not a wolf. I realize that this is not easy for you to talk about, but Stella . . . please do not hesitate to come and talk to me."

Stella lowered her gaze.

"Thank you very much, but I'll be able to manage . . ." Because she can't talk about it, she steers the conversation in another direction and asks him how his mother, Luna Crystal, is doing.

"She is doing very well, she said just this morning to ask you when you will come to visit her again."

She shrugged her shoulders slightly.

"I don't know; everything is still a bit confused at the moment and I can't say when I will get an opportunity, although I would very much like to see Luna again." And for you she thought to herself, she frowned. No, Stella, you are not going to let his empathy reawaken that infatuation within you again.

He chats for a while in general, He just has the feeling in the pit of his stomach that he shouldn't go now. The attraction of being with her doesn't make sense to him. She is not a wolf. Is it possible that a wolf's true mate can be human? He shakes his head; no Daphne is Beta Charlie's daughter, and she will make a good Luna. Ather his wolf growls and he ignore him.

"Are you planning to buy back Irish Wind on Friday?"

Because Stella doesn't immediately know what to say, she gets up to close the inner curtain.

"I will still have to think about it Paul. Now that my father is no longer here, I don't know if I will still be interested in racehorses. It was just a hobby of my father's."

He looked at her in surprise and a feeling of anxiety took possession of him, it was the only connection he still had with her!

"But you probably don't really mean it. What about Irish Wind then? Aren't you going to try to keep him?" That's not what he wanted to say at all, he wanted to ask, what about him, if she doesn't want to see him anymore. Ather cries and he feels his wolf's pain. How is it that Ather and he feel so rejected?

She shook her head quickly, too quickly, and said: "No, it's just going to bring up too many old memories." Stella cannot look him in the eye because she is afraid that he will find out that she is not telling the whole truth.

"That would be a shame," he replied softly. "Irish Wind is a special horse and I think a great future awaits him." He feels guilty because he knows he's not talking about the stallion. "Irish Wind has rested for two months now and I was going to persuade you to enter him in the Newmarket race."

Stella suddenly felt a vain throb against her left temple. Is everything just about the stallion? Then why doesn't he buy it himself? She takes a step forward as if she wants to sit down, but then just clasps her hands together: her fingers feel cold and stiff.

He gets up. He looks despondent and defeated. "It's almost ten o'clock, I'll have to go."

When he took her hand, holding it a moment longer than necessary, Ather cried. Shut up buddy I know how you feel, I just don't understand why we feel that way, Paul talks to his wolf.

She is my mate, replied Ather.

Can't be and he pushed Ather to the back of his mind.

"Once you've made up your mind about Irish Wind, feel free to let me know, because I'd love to help you keep him."

"Thank you"

"Goodbye then, see you later."

"Goodbye Alpha."

As he walks away from her and out the door, Stella can barely hide her sense of disappointment. Their conversation was just beginning to flow nicely when he decided to go. She wonders if she will see him every two weeks like in the past or if he won't visit her at all anymore.

She felt abandoned and lonely as she turned to go to her room.

It was the first time since they had known each other that she had spent an evening alone in his company. Before she met Ivan, she thought that Alpha Paul was a handsome and charming man and was madly in love with him. But because he apparently only came here to talk about horses with her father, she never tried to force herself onto him.

That's why he remained somewhat of a stranger to her, but after tonight's conversation she must admit that he surprised her to some extent. He talked in a certain way about things that she would never associate with him, and he can also talk about other things than just horses and his pack.

He is so completely different from the clean-cut and light-hearted Ivan who took her by surprise from the start with his bubbly personality. She loved him even before they knew each other properly and she knows that her feelings towards him have not changed. But where she was in love with Paul, she cannot understand the physical attraction between them. She tries to figure things out while sleep eludes her.