The engineer private nurse

i- Angel Rafflesia

Raffa's POV

"Raffa, hey! I need your attention. Are you okay?" Doc Cian asked worriedly. Tears rolled down my face looking at him.

His eyebrows met more when he saw me. "Why is there a problem?" He asked and put his arm around me. I shook my head even though I knew there was a real problem.

I had many questions and problems in those moments.

Why did he do that? What happened to him? Why do I have to take care of him?

"Doc..." I said full of doubt. I really wanted to withdraw my signature and reject him, but when I saw how happy he was when I agreed to be a private nurse, I still wanted to continue.

"What happened to you? Are you worried that my friend might do something to you? That's good, he won't do anything bad to you. He won't hurt you." He said convincingly to me.

That's not it, Doc. I hurt him and I can't show him yet.

I couldn't tell Doc Cian that because I was afraid of what he would say to me. Maybe later he will hate me because I hurt his friend.

"Don't you want to be Harris's personal nurse, Raffa?" He asked sadly, as if he could guess what I was thinking. I looked at him and saw sadness and disappointment on his face.

Raffa, please let it go. How much Doc Cian helped you. Even there you can recover.

I took a deep breath and faced him. "No Doc. I will be your friend's personal nurse." I swallowed hard and said to him. I saw the joy on his face when I said that. I can no longer refuse, Doc Cian is very happy with my consent.

He held my hand. "Thank you very much, Raffa. Thank you very much," he said sincerely, which is why I really couldn't say no.

But.. I still can't bear to see Harris. I can't yet.

I avoided going to the room Doc Cian told me earlier where Harris was. I'm not ready to see him yet. Not now.

I'm here at the nurse's station and I'm sitting. We don't have many patients and I'm assigned here now. I am the one who answers people who ask where their admitted relatives are and what else. I'm only here for a while because my area is E.R.

I turned to the man who was walking slowly and seemed to be talking on the cellphone. He was too tall that's why he caught my attention. I was nervous to see who he was.

He was wearing a polo shirt and behind him was hanging a container with a blue print. Even when he was walking, I could see his whole body. His face matured, his body got bigger, whiter and handsomer.

I was full of wonder. I thought Harris hadn't woken up yet? Why is he here and he seems to be doing so well? My confusion disappeared when the person I was looking at started to speak.

"Mommy, Calli is here. I can go to the site, I'll call you later," I heard Harren say-- he is Harris' twin. I recognized him because his two deep dimples appeared with every word he said. That's where they differ. Harren has two dimples, Harris doesn't have any but he has a very nice smile.

When I saw Harren I turned around. I'm afraid that he might see me, that he might be angry with me because I hurt his twin too much. I grabbed my chest. I feel a very strong heartbeat.

I've only seen Harren, this is how it affects me. Maybe because they look alike. I was nervous and my hands were sweating.

I heard the closing of the hospital's automatic door, he was already out, so I faced him again. A nurse was needed in the E.R. so I went there. I chose not to think about Harris while I was at work. I can't lose my concentration while helping people in need.

My work day is over. I worked overtime so my duty ended at ten o'clock. I took my backpack and rented a tricycle.

I rode a tricycle to go home. I even asked the tricycle driver that we stop at the fastfood chain because I'm going to buy my son's breakfast for tomorrow, I'll just heat it up.

Maybe Emi is asleep. He didn't catch me coming home again. After all, I'd rather he not wait for me and go to bed early.

The road is quiet, the only noise on the road is the sound of the tricycle I ride. I welcome the cold air.

"Brother, here's the payment." I caught up with the tricycle driver when we got home.

"Thank you," He said before starting the tricycle again.

I looked around the house before I entered. It's small but it fits mom, brother and Emi. I can't believe that fate will bring us here in Pampanga, where my ex-boyfriend's family lives.

I went to elementary school in Ilo-Ilo because that's where our hometown is. Because we couldn't pay the rent, we were evicted. We landed in Manila and lived before, at my aunt's house. I graduated from high school there and two years in college, I also met him in Manila. But fate tested us again so my aunt once again kicked us out due to the amount of debt we owed her. Until we found a home here in Pampanga.

The lights are off. People must be sleeping. I opened the door slowly, thank you and brother Aven didn't lock it because it would be embarrassing if I woke up.

I went to my room with Emi, I opened it slowly so as not to make any noise. I saw him, his whole body covered with a blanket. Not sleeping because the shoulders are moving.

My child is crying again.

"Emi, mom is here." I said weakly. His shoulders stopped moving and he sat on the bed. He hasn't faced me yet because he has secretly wiped away his tears which I have already seen.

"Mama," he said quietly and hugged me tightly. I feel the longing in that hug.

"Why are you still awake?" I asked him. He left my embrace and bowed.

"Maybe uncle Aven scolded you again, right? The TV is off but you're awake." I heard her sobbing. I shook my head and felt annoyed as I slowly confirmed that my suspicions were correct because of what he was doing.

I lifted his head with my two hands. He was sniffling, his nose was red, and his eyes were puffy. He did cry.

I watched his face. Harris and I are a mixed version of Emi, the shape of the face and eyes are mine. He got the nose and lips as well as how to smile from Harris. She was very beautiful, but always sad.

I looked straight into his eyes. "Emi, everything that uncle Aven said is not true. You have never been a torment to us. He was just hot-headed and he didn't mean to tell you that, okay?" I explained to him. A tear fell from his eyes at what I said.

"Is it always unintentional even though I hear it over and over again, mama?" He asked innocently and sobbing. I immediately felt sad because I felt how painful it was for him

"What did he say to you again?"

That was the reason he was crying. Why do you take your anger out on him, brother Aven? Emi was too young to hear such hurtful words.

"Mama, he said because t-if I wasn't in the world, you would be rich and wouldn't be in trouble. Then he hit my hand when I was about to turn on the TV. He said he was a wasteful man. I am." He said it was difficult. Something pierced my heart when I heard that.

"That's not true. Let me go, I'll talk to your uncle Aven tomorrow." I caressed her long hair.

"Mama, I'm scared. Uncle Aven is always mad at me even though I don't do anything bad," she said crying. I wiped her tears.

"Don't be afraid, mom is here."

He looked up at me. "I only feel safe every night, because you're here every night mom." Tears formed in the corners of my eyes when I heard that from him. This has been happening to him for a long time but he just said it now.

I really miss Emi. I did not fulfill my duty to him as a mother properly. It hurts to see my son cry like this.

"Mama, when can I spend a long time with you?"

I thought again about being a personal nurse to my son's father. It was even more difficult to withdraw my consent because of what my son said. When I accept that, I will have more time to be with Emi.

"Don't worry, Heaven Emiliana. You will be with mom for a longer time. Promise,"

he frowned but his eyes seemed to hope that what I was saying was true. I really lacked attention too much, that's why he's like this.

"How can that happen, mom? You're busy taking care of the sick, aren't you?" He asked innocently. There is no trace of reproach.

I smiled. He was very kind and always understood me. He was like Harris, never tired of understanding me.

"Because Doc Cian told me something. I already told you about him, didn't I?" Even though he was 10 years old, I still held him and hugged him. He didn't complain, I even heard him laugh when I did that.

"Yes, mom. He's your doctor's friend who is kind and gentle. Why?" I smiled. They haven't seen each other yet but they already know each other just because of my stories.

"Yes. Because Doc Cian told me that I won't be working at the hospital for a while. Emi," I pretended to say sadly. He forced himself to face me even though he was holding me.

"Huh? Did he fire you from work? Did I think he was nice?" I laughed when I felt his voice rise. My son is so cute.

"It's not like that, he told me. He said I'm going to take care of a boy.. I'll only work every morning so I can drop you off and pick you up from your school. You'll be with me for two months, Emi!" I'm happy to tell you. He got out of the hug and hugged me.

"Come on! Is it true, mom?" He said in disbelief.

I don't like Emi but for you, I'll do it. "Yes, t-it's true." I said sure.

"I'm so happy, mom!" He jumped even more after that. He was obviously very happy. His happiness is so shallow. I smiled, he really is my heaven. He makes me happy and comfortable.

He ended up jumping. "Mama! Who will you take care of? Why only one? Is that possible?" he asked. I lost my smile.

I'll take care of your father, Emi.

"F-he's Doc Cian's friend. He had an accident and needs a nurse like me to get him well. Doc Cian said it's okay." I stammered.

"Ah! Your doctor friend is really kind, mom! I'm so happy! I won't be alone anymore!" He said really happy.

"Yes, Emi. You weren't really alone. You were left alone but I will find a way to come back and stay by your side, Emiliana." He nodded.

"I know that. Good luck mom! I know you can heal Doc Cian's friend because you are a good nurse!" He will give me more courage.

"I hope so, maybe when he sees me it will only hurt him more." None of my own words.

"Huh? Why mom?" Emi suddenly asked. Emi is my comfort zone, because she is mature enough to think and even though she is young, she can give me advice. Emi is such a smart kid. He knows everything about me, except for one.

Who is his father..

He never asked me about his father but mom told me that Emi was asking him. He didn't answer any of her questions because what mom wanted was mine.

I'm not telling stories because what else is it for? If I tell Emiliana about Harris, she will only want to be with him, which is impossible because of the way I hurt her feelings. Emi will hope and wait for nothing, I don't want her to feel what I feel.

Because until now I hope and wait for the chance that he will accept me again.

"Emi, mom has a question for you." My introduction.

"What is that?"

"For example, I told you that I'm leaving you and that I don't love you anymore. How would you feel?" I suddenly asked. I don't know why I am asking him like this.

He was holding her chest. "Mom, I'm sick. You're not going to do that to me, are you?" I felt the fear and pain when he said that.

I hugged him and gave him a kiss on the forehead. "I won't do that to you, Emi. I will never leave you and hurt you,"

"Thank you, mom."

I forced a smile. Just saying that hurt him too much. Especially maybe Harris. He loved me so much then I left him. I have no right to ask for a second chance.

"Go to sleep, Emi. Don't worry about everything that uncle Aven said to you, huh?"

He nodded. "I won't be sad anymore mom. You're already here." He said with a smile.

"Alright, go to sleep. Good night, Emi."

"Good night, mom. I love you."

"Love you too, son."

I watched him sleep. His face is peaceful, far from what I saw when I came home. I arranged the things we would use tomorrow before laying next to him to sleep.

"What is it? You bought breakfast just for Emiliana? What about us, Raffa?" I closed my eyes when I heard brother Aven's angry voice again.

"Brother, I'm just rewarding Emi because she has great honors at school. Then I cooked you breakfast, right?" I took it back from her while fixing Emi's food that I bought last night at a fast food chain. Emi is still sleeping and I will wake her up later.

He hit the table hard. "Are we going to have fun, Rafflesia, huh? If you just bought fast food, you would have sympathized with us!" My eyebrows met at what he said.

"What the hell, brother? Don't you understand that Emiliana is a child and needs this kind of treatment? It's because you don't care about my daughter. Do you think I don't know that you said hurtful words to her again?" I said annoyed.

"Eh wasteful. The TV is going to be turned on tonight! Because you are the same burden in this household. Raffa." His words were like a knife stabbing my heart.

"Aven Rafael! What are you saying to Raffa again?" Mom attended me. He was in front of me again. Mom is really my protector whenever my brother is like this.

My brother taught me. "That's why. You know we're poor and then we act rich? Hey, Raffa! Wake up, we're poor and we're still poor because of you, you!" There were tears in my eyes.

"Aven, can't you see that only Rafflesia is keeping us alive right now? She's working hard at the hospital just to earn money. She's the one who feeds you and teaches you. Don't you owe something? Did you contribute something to this? at home, huh?" Mom said angrily.

"We would have been relieved if Raffa mama hadn't gotten pregnant. Because she got pregnant, I had to make sacrifices that were wasted!" My brother is revisiting the past. I bowed down.

"You are just like your name, looks like an Angel but a parasite." He said before turning back.

Maybe it's because of the emergency that my brother can tell me all that. Just because of that.

I wiped the tears from my eyes.

When I become a private nurse, we will be more at ease, brother. Even though I don't want to show Harris because of the magnitude of my sin against him, I will agree to be his personal nurse. My face is getting thick. To make up for our family.

iI- Harris Emmanuel

Raffa's POV

"What are you, private nurse? Is that possible?" Matri asked in shock. My friend who is always with me. Even though he is busy with his own business, he still doesn't forget to visit me. Just like today, we took Emi to school and we got in her car. Now he will take me to the hospital.

I took a deep breath. "Yes, private nurse. My salary is triple and I only work half a day." He braked because of that, so suddenly and I didn't expect it that I almost got knocked over. Since we were just next to each other, I hit his arm.

"What the hell, Maia Trisha? Take it easy!" I said annoyed but I didn't get any response from him. He just rolled the car to the side.

"Hey, I still have work to do." I remind him. Maybe he forgets that I'm a nurse and my duty starts at eight, it's a quarter to eight.

"I don't care. Jusko, Raffa! That's a great offer! Thank you! Thank you for giving Raffa the job that--" I cut off what he was saying.

"I will only take care of Harris, Matri." I told him. I was so surprised that he ignored the name I mentioned. He is still a word of mouth.

Matri knows everything about me, from high school to now we are still friends. When my aunt kicked us out of their house in Manila, she did everything to follow me here in Pampanga.

He witnessed all the events in my life. Whether that's happiness or suffering. He is my sympathizer in all those things. Besides Emi, I tell her all my problems and secrets.

"So what? At least your work is good! It will help Emi, your aunt and your brother a lot! I'm so proud of you, Raffa!" He said happily, he even grabbed my shoulders and shook me.

Why is he so happy? He was the first one to get angry with me when I broke up with Harris. Then this will be his reaction? It's very surprising.

I looked at him in wonder. "Matri, do you know what you are saying? I will take care of Harris! Harris Emmanuel Lozan is the father of my child. What is it, Matri?" I almost screamed in the car because he didn't seem to understand me.

"What?!" He asked me in surprise. His eyes widened as he faced me. Because I was not listened to properly. Now he came to his senses.

I shook my head. "Now tell me. Is it right for me to accept that?" I asked him bitterly. He sighed and didn't answer me, he started the car again. His previously happy face was replaced by an emotionless one.

"If it's about the offer, you shouldn't think twice and accept that job. But if you're going to take care of him, I don't know how to answer, Raffa." It was obvious that he too was confused.

"I'm looking at your side the same way. Sorry Raffa, but what you did was very painful on Harris' part. How is it that the person loves you so much and then you suddenly break up with him. If it were me, I would not accept it because I have nothing to show him. ." His straight forwardness is one of the things I like about him.

"W-what do I do? I already signed the contract." I said weakly and bowed. Pulling the strap of my backpack.

"What? Why did you do that? Can you really face him, Raffa?" He asked in shock and challenge. I kept looking at my backpack.

"I-I didn't look up his full name. When Doc Cian said that, I was blinded by happiness because of that wonderful offer. It was too late when I found out that Harris was the one I would take care of." I explained to him. He didn't speak and just listened to me.

"Doc Cian is a friend of Harris, I already know that in the past months because they also brought a friend of theirs to the hospital and I was one of the ones who took care of him. What I am telling you about? I saw him well and I'm wearing a surgical mask." I told him.

"Wait, friend? Don't say that they---" I cut him off again.

"Yes. Their group used to be together until now. I'm wondering why I didn't know Doc Cian then, he's also a friend of Harris. I don't know! I'm confused as long as what I'm worried about now is her condition and how I will show her as a private nurse. How will I deal with her. Hello, Harris! I'm back, but as your so personal private nurse."

"W-wait, why are you taking care of Harris, huh? Is he sick?!" He asked me. He was obviously confused by what I was saying.

Haven't I told you the reason yet?

"He had an accident, his car crashed into a big tree." I said sadly and looked at him. He held his mouth. He kept one hand on the steering wheel.

"Shit, Angel Rafflesia. How is she?" His face immediately became worried. As long as Harris and I have been in a relationship, he and Matri have been friends for as long. They are very close to each other but because of what I did, it seems that he too was ashamed of what I did and never showed up or talked to Harris.

"That's right, until now he hasn't woken up. In addition to the traumatic brain injury, he also has an injury to his leg and knee. That's what I'm going to do, because I have experience in therapy, Doc Cian took me. "

"You know, accept Doc Cian's offer." He said seriously. I looked at him in surprise.

"Huh? You won't fight? Why?"

He held my hand. "This is your time to prove yourself to him, Raffa. It's like you've recovered from.. uhm.. what happened to you before." It's like he's avoiding saying what I did to leave Harris because he doesn't want to make me feel guilty. She's really the best.

"You think that's what I should do?" I still ask. He nodded and slowly turned the car. We are close to the hospital

"Because think about it, because of your care, he will be able to recover quickly. Everyone knows how you care and how good a nurse you are, add your experience in therapy. If you hurt her feelings before, now you will help her recover." He said nodding his head.

"Maybe, I need to do that. We're tight again. Even though the school year is coming to an end and Emi is going on vacation, I still need money. My brother is still going to college, Emi after 2 It's been another month, and mom needs maintenance. The bills, water, electricity, house rent. It would be okay if I wasn't the only one working for us, right? It's just me." I said frustrated. I just told my expenses and I felt a headache.

"It would be good if nurses' salaries were as big as doctors', but it's not. Then last night, I was tired from work, and then I went to see my son who was crying because he said hurtful words to me again. I'm not scolding but I'm getting back, right? I'm the one teaching him now but why is he still so mad at me?"

Matri held my hand again. "I'm always here, Raffa. You can tell me about any problem. That's your older brother, wait for him to realize how important you are in his life. I really do, Rafflesia. He's making me angry again." I laughed because he seemed really angry.

"That's fine, I'm really the reason why we're suffering even more now." I said bitterly.

He hit my shoulder. "Girl, what are you doing! Okay fine, you worked a little hard but look at the replacement, a very beautiful and very kind Heaven Emiliana Vasquez Loz---"

"I never regretted giving birth to Emi, it was the best thing that happened in my life. Even if it were my life, I will not regret having a child." I told him.

"Okay, I'm so proud of you, Raffa. Cheer up, I'm just here." We are opposite the hospital.

"Thank you, Matri. See you soon," He hugged me and kissed me. I put the bag on my back.

"Okay, don't get too tired, Raffa." I was about to open the door of his car when he suddenly grabbed my bag so I sat in the car again.

"Why?"

"Jusko, Raffa! I remembered something. If you take care of Harris, will you tell about Emi?" He said as if he was panicking, as if he was more nervous than me.

But when he said that. I thought, should I tell him? Or I'll just hide it.

I don't know what to answer.

"I haven't thought about that yet, Matri. It's up to you. Alright, I'm going to school and I might be late." I said with a forced smile.