The Seventh Commandment

Promises. I fucking hate that word. All my life promises gave me pain. If I only used my brain, I wouldn't be in this situation that I am in. I wouldn't be in hell for the past years. I wouldn't be hurt. I wouldn't be battered.

There were things in life that changed. There were things in life that would change you.

Everything wasn't permanent.

Even love would fade.

I never thought that love would ruin me. I never thought that the man I love dearly would hurt me until I bleed.

The only man that I thought that would stand by me was the reason why I am hurting and still hurting. All this time, I was broken by him.

False hope. The right word to describe it.

I shrugged the thoughts off and shook my head. I smiled bitterly as the memories came flashing in my head, then I asked myself. Why wasn't it fading? Why am I still hurting? When would I forget the memories?

"You're crying, again?"

I wiped my tears instantly as I heard Nanny Belen's soothing voice. I looked at her direction and saw pity in her eyes. She even tapped my shoulder and offered her handkerchief to me.

Nanny Belen was like a guardian to me. I was ten years old when my mother died because of cancer. My father was nowhere to find because I am a product of a one night stand. But, Nanny Belen took care of me and treated me like her own kid.

My life was painful. It seemed that I caught all the unwanted things that life could offer.

"I am just sad Nay," I said and hugged her tight.

"Everything has a reason Sofia," Nanny Belen answered. I could feel the pain in her voice. I knew she was hurting too seeing me like this.

"I know. But--"

She cut me off and shook her head. "Change your clothes now and be prepared. Fausto will call you later. There will be a dinner with his investors," Nanny said.

I felt the sudden rush. My senses were also awakened. I desperately tried to calm myself and looked at Nanny Belen after I released her from the hug.

Fausto was expecting a visitor. He said it was his investors. I am not actually interested. Not even thinking about it. But because Fausto told me about the dinner, I felt afraid to say no. Because I knew he would get mad if I declined. He was like a devil reincarnated.

Fausto was my husband. We were married for five years. Five years of hurting and crying for me too.

I was young when I married him. I am vulnerable and broken that I even agreed to marry him. The only thing that I regretted until now because, marrying him was like hell.

"I will leave you now, Sofia." She handed me a black dress.

I nodded and took the dress from her. I sighed and watched her leaving. I am all alone again. The loneliness of my room made my heart hurt and the reality I had been living.

I should be used to it but no. I am still aware of everything. I am still not numb.

----------------------

"Where is Sofia? Why'd she still not here?" I heard Fausto shriek. I could also imagine his mad face. He was always like this. He was always mad when the thing was about me, which made me confused.

Fausto was my former employer. He was a haciendero from the province. He owned half of the land in San Vicente. He was powerful and wealthy. He controlled his people and everything. He also controlled me, which was odd because I was once his favourite scholar. He cared for me once. He gave me shelter and sent me to school.

But, that was a long time ago.

Everything changed. Everything was ruined. And, it was all because of that one man.

I shook my head and tried to compose myself. I instantly saw Fausto at the edge of the grand staircase, waiting for me. He instantly smiled upon seeing me that made me want to roll my eyes on him. But, I suppressed myself. I made a fake smile, instead.

"You're late. I've been waiting for you." Fausto kissed me when I reached his spot. "You know I don't like to wait," he whispered.

I nodded to his remarks while he grabbed my arm and held it tight. I am hurting but I couldn't do anything. Fausto took something special to me. It was very special that I am willing to take the risk and live in hell just so I could protect it. The only reason that I am still breathing.

"Let's go!" Fausto said and pulled me to be near him. We walked out of the mansion. He was in a hurry. We walked directly to the garden that was situated at the back.

As we reached the spot, Fausto's visitor's were already eating. And it wasn't just his business partner's. They were all familiar to me because they were the Guerrero's. The family of politicians in our province.

It wasn't just a normal dinner. It was some sort of a family dinner.

I looked at them one by one. My heart hurt when the realization hitted me. It hurt as I figured it out and saw Aria and her family. Her brother was also present. And I am not dumbed for what was about to happen.

"Aria, Hija. Did you call Zeus again?" Aria's mom asked.

I looked at Aria's mom. My heart hurt even more as it beat faster when I heard his name. How could it still affect me when what happened between us was a long time ago? Some people forgot about it already. I am the only one that still holds the memories. I am still the loser that couldn't move on from the very beginning.

"Sorry, I'm late!"

My body froze while all the people in the table looked at where the voice came from. I even looked at it too, and my heart stopped when I saw the man standing proudly a few meters away from us. He was eyeing us one by one but when his eyes met mine, he stopped. His stare made my knees shake and made my heart pound even more.

"It's been a while," he said while his eyes were still on me. His jaw clenched.

Yes. It has been a while. Six years had passed but nothing changed to me. I am still vulnerable. My heart was still aching.

I felt Fausto wrapped his arm on my waist but I didn't bother to ask. My mind seemed shut because of Zeus and his eyes.

For the past years that he was gone, I never did forget him. I never did. My heart just couldn't. And tonight, I knew it wouldn't be the same anymore.

I hoped someone would save me from drowning. I hoped that someone would take away the pain that I was feeling. Because, we already finished everything. Because, we already ended everything a long time ago.

The night ended so fast. Well, at least for me. I knew that I was the only one who didn't belong to that dinner.

After we ate, I abruptly went to my room and lay down on the bed. I thought about so many things that I couldn't undo.

My heart kept on bleeding because of those memories from the past. It was still inside of my heart.

I asked myself,why I was not like those people who forget easily? Why was I still holding those memories?

I really admired those kinds of people. Taking everything as a challenge and new beginnings though it hurts them big time.

But, I was not like them. People were different. Maybe, I was still stuck to those memories because it was special to me. But, I am tired. My heart and my soul were tired.

When I looked at Zeus a while ago, I saw how meaningless I am to him. It seemed that he didn't care for me at all. It seemed that my presence wasn't important for him anymore. But still, I wanted to know why. Why did he leave? Why did he break me into pieces and treat me like trash? Why did he hurt me?

I am sad and broken. I pitied myself so much and blamed myself for ending like this but, I couldn't turn back time.

If I could only bring back time, I wouldn't do the same. I could only be the same girl liked before. I knew it was impossible. I couldn't undo things. I could only remember those memories and get hurt again. Memories that brought so much pain in me.

December 2013 (Flashback)

"What happened to you? Why are you so dirty?" My Nanny Bellen asked as I entered the kitchen. She was busy preparing for food but she managed to look at me. She said that Hacienda Vergara was expecting a visitor, the child of Don Fausto from America.

I licked my lower lip and pout lips when Nanny Belen pinched me in my waist. I sighed and continued my pace. I sat down in the vacant chair in front of her abruptly.

I am not that dirty, actually. My hair was disheveled and my uniform creased because of a fight with Helga, but I still looked fine.

Helga was getting on my nerves. Her boyfriend courted me when they broke up but she got mad. She said things out of the blue that fueled my anger. In the end, I punched her. I also punched her boyfriend slash cheater Joshua.

"Got a fight from school, Nanny. They're the once that approached me first," I lied. I also made my face pitiful to convince her. Sometimes, it was better to lie because explaining was hard for me.

I pouted my lips once more and looked at Nanny again. I knew she wasn't convinced. She just looked at me unbelievably and shook her head. I even heard her heavy sigh but I knew she loved me. I am spoiled to her from the start.

"I don't really know about you, Sofia. You act like an Amazona. Your mom wasn't like that. She was kind and polite and very outspoken," she stated.

I rolled my eyes to Nanny. It was my habit but it doesn't mean I disrespected her. "So, why is it that I was born without a father, Nanny? What am I, a gift from heaven?" I asked sarcastically.

I chuckled lightly when I saw Nanny Belen's eyes widened. I abruptly got out of the chair and ran as fast as I could. I knew I hit the boundary. I knew I shouldn't have said things like that but I just couldn't help it.

I went to our barn directly. It was located at the back of the mansion. Nanny and I lived in the barn for many years now and it was fine. Don Fausto allowed us to use the barn while he sent me to school. I am his scholar and I am thankful because of that. Sometimes, he was acting weird but it was fine for me.

I was walking into the barn when I bumped a stranger. My forehead creased and looked at him directly. He wasn't familiar to me and I am to him either. He gave me a confused look while scanning me from head to foot.

"What's with that look?" I asked. I didn't feel anything for him. I wasn't afraid either.

He smiled that made me caught off guard. Right there and then, I admit that he was handsome. Pointed nose with a white complexion. Slim but not too thin. He actually looked like Korean actors.

"What are you saying?" he asked and looked at me intently while I was looking at him too. "You looked gross. But, you're still cute," he added. He even patted my head and exited himself away from me.

I was in total shock to think about what he does. I lost words. When I got back my senses, I acted like I punched him from the back. I didn't know who he was but he made me stunned for a moment. My heart was also beating fast. I couldn't explain anything for the reason that it was new to me.

I let out a heavy sigh and shrugged my thoughts off. I continued my pace and entered directly to our house. I changed and fixed myself before I went back to the mansion. I wanted to help Nanny to fix the table for dinner later.

"Nanny? Is Don Fausto's child already here?" I stated, curiously. I was helping her out in putting plates on the table when I asked.

Nanny Belen nodded and continued her works. I pouted my lips. Nanny was always quite about the issues. He didn't want to mingle others business.

At exactly six in the evening, Don Fausto arrived in the mansion. As usual, he looked tired. Nanny Belen and I were at the side of the door to greet him. Don Fausto scanned the place and when his eyes pointed directly to me, I'm sure I saw a flicker of emotion in it. He then smiled at me that made me uneasy. He looked creepy.

"Is my son already here, Belen?" he asked and continued walking inside the house. He stopped midway and looked at me. "Sofia, how was your school?" he added.

"F-Fine Sir," I replied.

"Good." he commented and continued walking.

I felt odd. I was nervous as fuck. My heart was beating fast too, and I felt scared for no reason. Don Fausto acted strange when it was all about me.

I shook my head and shrugged the thoughts off. Maybe, it was nothing to him. Maybe, he cared for me that much that it bothered me.

I looked at Don Fausto again. He stopped and made my forehead creased. I looked up to the staircase and realized why.

The sound of the footsteps were clear. The image of the man was also clear that it shocked me the most.

How could I be so dumbed to realize it a while ago?

"Why are you looking at Don Fausto's son like that?"

I shook my head and didn't budge to answer Nanny Belen. I was just looking at Don Fausto's son and it made me feel odd. It made me feel uneasy. He irritates my sight.

(End of Flashback)

They said too much love will kill you. Maybe, that was the right thing that happened to me. I feel in love that it ruined me.

Love. Honesty. Promises.

There were countless eyes that cried because of those words. There were a lot of hearts that ached and pained because of those soothing and cunning words.

And, I was not an exemption. I also love the wrong person. So wrong, that became the reason why I lost myself.

But, why does it feel so right? I knew I was crazy. Because, I was a girl who couldn't move on.

How could I move on, if loving him means a lot to me? Loving him gave me the best gift that the woman could have. But, unlucky because until now, that gift wasn't with me. The reason why I still live with Fausto until now.

My thoughts got interrupted when Fausto entered the room. He looked mad and abruptly went my direction. I got up and from bed and fixed myself but Fausto's sudden slap stopped me from what I should do.

All my senses got back. The familiar pain in my cheek brought me back to the reality that I am in. This was my life for six years.

"I've been knocking on your door! What are you doing? Why not open it?!" he shrieked.

I shifted my gaze to Fausto. I am ready to answer him when he slapped me again. He slapped me nonstop and it made my cheek numb. Each slap he gave could lose my consciousness anytime but I kept myself strong. I made myself brave for everything.

"Don't act like an idiot, Sofia. Forget about him!" Fausto's voice roared all over the room. His words pierced to my soul too. It was like a dagger that had been thrown to me without notice. It hitted me to the core and killed me slowly.

When Fausto was satisfied in hurting me, he left the room. Who would have thought that the person I thought would care and save me was the same person why I am in pain today. He promised to take care of me just like his son did.

Zeus, Fausto's son, promised me everything. He was my first love. I gave him my everything. But as what the saying goes, promises are made to be broken.

I smiled bitterly because of the thought. Zeus broke me literally.

------

I woke up late the next day. I slept last night after I cried my heart out but the feeling was still the same. My eyes were weary and swelling but I didn't care. I was used to it. I should be used to it.

I fixed myself and took a bath before I went out of my room. I also put a concealer to my bruises to hide it. To hide the life that I had for the past years.

I sighed and went directly to the kitchen. I smiled instantly seeing Nanny Belen inside while fixing some things. I abruptly embraced her tight from the back and leaned my face on her nape.

"You had a fight with him again? He hurt you again?" It wasn't a question but a statement. I nodded and sighed. I wanted to release the heavy feeling inside my heart but I just couldn't. Nanny Belen knew the whole me. Especially when I was acting like this.

Nanny ended the hug and looked at me. She looked at me with pity in her eyes and it hurted me more. My heart contracted. Nanny was aching for me too. I knew, she could feel my agony and crying too.

"When are you going to leave him, Sofia? This is enough!" she commented.

"I don't know," I answered. I just couldn't leave Fausto for now. I didn't know when either.

Nanny Belen nodded and gave me my breakfast instead. As usual, it was my favourite. Bacon and egg with fried rice. In that simple way my pain subsided. Nanny was like a Fairy Godmother to me that was sent by heaven.

After I ate, I decided to go outside of the mansion and tour around the garden. Fausto has a lot of flowers that sometimes I just kept on looking at it to ease my burden.

As usual, I went to my favourite spot. In the swing near to our old house. I sat on the swing and embraced the cool wind.

This place was where I found peace. Years ago, this place was my sanctuary. How ironic it was to find peace on the same spot where I got my heart broken. This place reminded me so much.

I let myself relax for a while before I got up. But, before I could open my eyes fully, a sarcastic approach greeted me.

"So, I guess old habits die hard, huh." It was Zeus. He was looking at me with his angry expression.

I blinked a few times to confirm that he was really in front of me. I also looked up and stared at him. He was still the Zeus I knew a long time ago, physically. But, deep on my heart I know he changed.

"Stop assuming things, Zeus," I said with authority.

I didn't want him to see that his presence still could affect me. That I was still that young girl who loved him dearly. I didn't want him to know that even though he hurt me a long time ago, I still love him. Because, I should stop. I should stop because I knew it would be a mistake. I was not free just like before. I am committed to someone already and that was his father.

"Look at you now, a heredera. The perks of marrying my father." Zeus smiled. A dangerous one. I felt nervous but I needed to stop myself. That smug in his face was the same way that I fell in love with a long time ago. But despite, I know he was actually insulting me. And it hurted me because he didn't know anything. He didn't know my pain.

"Yes! I was actually enjoying this place where I'm in Zeus," I said with conviction.

Zeus smug vanished. His eyes widened and looked at me angrily. The Zeus that I once loved was gone and it hurted me.

Zeus leaned closer to me and whispered closely to my ear. "Always the fiesty, huh. Stop pretending that you didn't care at all."

Zeus bit my earlobe slowly and licked it after. I closed my eyes when he trailed his lips to my cheek because of the sensation he was giving me. When he finally closed to my lips, he claimed it. Zeus was kissing me and I'm letting him do it. My heart was pounding so fast that it hurt even more knowing that the kisses we once shared were gone. It wasn't the same anymore.

I opened my eyes and tried to stop him with all the strength and courage I've got when the realization hit me. He loosened his grip to me and I abruptly took the chance to move away from him. Then, I slapped him.

Confusion was written all over my face while I was breathing fast. Why would he do it? He was already engaged and I was his father's wife for God's sake.

Zeus touched his face the same spot that I slap and look at me. He didn't have any reaction at all. He just stood in front of me intently while his forehead creased.

"Don't you ever do that again, Zeus!"I shrieked. I needed to be strong and tough in front of him. Wherein the truth was my legs were already wobbled. I needed to hide it. I am already done being vulnerable.

Zeus smirked and shook his head. He grabbed my head and pulled it close to him. He was really mad. I could see it in his eyes.

"You know how I fucking hate you for marrying my father?" I could see his jaw tightened. I could feel his anger by his words. I could feel it.

Zeus released me from his grip. The words he said were like a sword that hit me directly. It made me broken and hurt even more. It was simple but it was the most painful, too.

Zeus left me after. I watched him leaving and let my tears feel.