The Howling Voice of a Mute Beauty

To lead a life worth living, to make money, and give my brother the best things in the world.

That was my motivation ever since I worked in this place.

"Tayla, it's time!" Ella, my best friend yelled at me when she saw me at the counter. I wiped the sweat on my forehead using my hand and nodded at her.

Tonight is one of those nights where I need to change from being a waitress to a part-time singer in this bar. I have been working here for about a year. On Monday, Wednesdays, and Fridays, I work only as a waitress but every Thursday and Saturday nights, I am also a singer.

My mom and dad both died in a car crash when I was twelve. I was about to have my graduation ceremony in elementary when that happened, they just got out of work and excited to go to the venue. That time, my graduation ceremony just ended when my Aunt's shaking voice and tearful eyes, welcomed me, telling me that my parents got hit by a ten-wheeler truck and were dead on arrival.

After the fall of my parents, we were forced to live with Aunt Tanya, my Mom's sister. She's a bisexual, and she's got a witch wife who abuses us. She's hurting us whenever we do things we didn't even know is wrong.

Sometimes, I will go out and ask her if I can go to the church and pray for my parent's soul but she wouldn't let me, and I will end up insisting, making her smash my butt with a belt.

Those things are really annoying, I was then, a minor and can't speak up for myself and for my brother. He was always with his friends, and I was always out, doing school works with my group mates and go home late with no food at the table. My brother and I suffered so much, including our stomach aches and nights where we would just cry because we are hungry.

I absolutely think it wasn't right, but I got no courage to speak up and protect ourselves.

"Tayla! Get up!" The manager of the club yelled and pointed at the stage. I tied my hair up and went out of the restroom with my black fitted pants, a white V-neck shirt tucked inside it, and white sneakers.

"Sorry, Sir. I will go now, " I said and went towards the three steps stair, pick an acoustic guitar, and sat on a high chair with a mic placed on a stand in front.

This is a simple bar. This is one of those jobs that accepted me even on flexible hours. The place is small but enough to accommodate about fifty people and the wage adds up to my income which I use to support my brother's needs.

Unlike those night clubs where you can dance and booze, this place is calmer and more suitable for the younger ones. The room was dark, and the people are sitting on their tables, waiters are serving them foods, and their eyes are glued at the people on the stage.

I signed at the drummer to stop for a bit and held my mic, positioning it in front of my mouth where I will not have difficulty once I played the guitar.

"Good evening, Everyone. For those who are new here, my name is Tayla."

My eyes darted at the two men who just entered the bar. They are tall, probably comparable to those basketball players in our University. The one is wearing a pair of eyeglasses, and the other one is just sporting his man bun.

The first one looks like a studious man, but the other seems like he's the opposite. I am not sure, but I think his eyes were amethyst. His thick brows were furrowed, and I don't know if I am just imagining things or he glanced at me.

I cleared my throat.

"I can see that we have a lot of newcomers, I hope you will enjoy this song. Anyway, if you know it, you can sing along." I smiled and started to strum my guitar and played an acoustic version of Dream it Possible by Delacey.

I roamed my eyes at the whole place. Some are still not paying attention and are busy whispering with the person beside them, some are glancing at me and sings along as I sang the lyrics...but the same man with a pair of amethyst colored eyes is what I caught. He is staring at me, and then his eyes dropped at my guitar.

He glanced at the geeky-looking man beside him and whispered something, and then glimpsed at me again.

It felt weird because when our eyes locked, my voice trembled and became flat. I didn't hit the exact note! It was very rare, I normally make sure that I am hitting the notes right when I am performing but today, I just missed it!

I averted my gaze and plastered a fake smile on my face as I wandered my orbs again at the place, careful not to have a glimpse of him or I will miss another note.

I smiled after I finished all three songs, the audiences clapped as I stood up and bid my goodbyes before walking down the stage, but my head turned to where the man is and glanced at him again.

My heart beat wildly when I saw his eyes turned to me. I immediately removed my eyes off him, hurriedly went to the comfort room and changed into my casual attire, and then go home.

I was fixing my hair tie when I went back to the counter to say goodbye to Ella and to the staff when again, I caught his dark gaze.

He is now sitting on the far left table, his dark eyes glued on me, and his hand waving like he is telling me to come close.

Did he think that I am still a waitress right now? But it's no longer my duty!

I tried to find Ella and saw her bowing her head several times in front of an old foreigner. He is pushing a bowl towards her, and I can hear Ella uttering her apologies.

I shook my head. People with money really thinks too highly of themselves. With money, comes power, eh? But instead of helping Ella, I decided to just pick an order not up and a pen before slowly walking towards the man's table.

I want to help her, but one of my mottos that I will never forget is not to argue with fools. Pushing an argument towards them will not benefit me and will just waste my time only to tackle about petty things.

I sighed. The man started to chuckle after he whispered something to the man beside him, and then he will glance at me and laugh. My cheeks burned, watching someone laugh as I walk close is embarrassing, I feel like my face looked so flustered, but hey, I am just doing this for work.

Maybe they will order.

I tried to force a smile as I walk towards them, but when I am just about five steps away, a tall, hot girl accidentally hits my shoulder and sat beside the man.

"Baby!" She kissed his cheeks but his eyes never left mine. When he saw that I am still walking towards him, he smirked.

My brows furrowed in confusion. Why is he suddenly smirking at me?

"Good evening, what's your order?" I smiled at the three of them. The blonde-haired girl's hand is placed on top of his knees, touching it in a sensual manner. Her eyes focused on the man while the latter was now staring at her, listening to what she was whispering as his arm snaked behind her.

"Uh...Sir?" I iterated. The man glanced at me with a frown, maybe irritated at my sudden interruption.

"What? Why are you here? We are still not planning to order, " he uttered in an annoyed voice.

"Huh? Sorry, but I saw you waving my hands at me, I thought it was meant to–"

"He was waving at me. I am his girlfriend, don't get so full at yourself and get lost!" The girl shot me with a strict, infuriated face.

They are arrogant, alright. People like this shouldn't be encountered but can't be delayed nor prevented. The world is really unfair, no matter how you try to tell him that you don't want any people that will only fuel your anger, he will still give it.

I sighed and glanced at the geeky man. He was busy texting, but when he felt me glancing at him, he lifted his eyes.

"Uh...sorry, Miss. My friend didn't mean it. I will order a juice, I'm sorry again..." he awkwardly smiled at me and shot his gaze back to his phone, punching his keys fast like he's talking to someone so important. I nodded and glanced at the two before walking back at the counter.

"Ella, this was the order from table thirteen, I'm gonna go home now, just deliver it to them." I kissed her cheeks and walk away from that bar.

I stretched my arms and put my hands at my head, intertwining my fingers with each other and making my forearms point towards the sky.

"I endured another day of hell, thanks to the one who guides me." I smiled and reached for my pockets before going inside a convenience store to buy something for my fourteen-year-old brother.

"Terren! Where are you?" I yelled when I came to our house..The excitement in my voice is evident as I turned the knob of our door and glanced at the whole place. Our house has a second floor, but it felt so small because of the number of furniture on it.

"Terren, I bought you something–" the cheerfulness in my voice was interrupted when I saw my brother eating using a cauldron. His mouth fell open, his eyes wide, and the dirty hands he was using to put food inside his mouth was left hanging in the air.

"Terren, what is this?" My voice shook as I asked him.

The corners of my eyes started to heat as I glanced at the old cauldron. His hands were shaking as he averted his gaze. He was probably...starving.

The sticky, brown crispy part of the rice from overcooking is what he was eating, paired with a soy sauce. I touched his hands and put it in front of the faucet to wipe out the dirt.

"Why are you eating this? They didn't give you food again?" My voice shook, feeling miserable with the sight of my brother, eating excess food.

"And your hands are dirty, you'll get sick. Wash your hands and I'll buy you a proper food–"

"Ate, they are not allowing me to use their water. They told me to search for water by myself but the faucet spits no liquid." His low, husky voice told me that he doesn't even drink.

I sighed. A tear fell from my eyes as I walk towards the small, messy room that we used to sleep. Broken appliances and some sacks of unused clothes by them were placed here, making it look so unorganized even when I clean it every day.

My heart hurts for my brother. I am almost not going home, and whenever I am, I will always see him like this, but every time I will catch him in this state, my heart will always boom in both anger and disappointment towards my Auntie. She is our own blood and flesh, how can she do this to her own nephew? Isn't she being reminded of her sister?

I shook my head and wiped my tears as I search for my hidden savings. I will get a small amount from it and will buy my brother a proper meal. My heart boomed loud as I saw the envelope under my favorite shirt. It felt weird, I don't remember it being this light. I opened it, and the next thing I knew, it fell on the floor.

The money is half as the amount that I exactly put in there. I am preparing that money for the house I am going to buy! I am working so hard because of that and now, a big amount has been decreased!

I furrowed my brows. My tears fell down my eyes as I paced towards my Aunt's door. I knocked loudly, bringing all the anger and sulk in my knuckles.

"Auntie Tanya!" I yelled behind the door. My tears were flowing, my eyes turned red, and my heart beat wildly.

"Auntie–" The door revealed the face of my Aunt's wife.

"What?" Her strict, infuriating face is getting inside my nerves.

"Where is my money?" I asked in a calm voice, the opposite of what I am feeling right now.

"Why are you asking me about your money? I don't even know you have one!"

"Just tell me where did you spend it and I will shut my mouth! Don't cover up your pitiful lies!"

I usually tell myself not to argue with these types of people. They are just a bunch of fools who doesn't have a short time nor long time goals. They were contented as long as they can eat twice a day and doesn't even care if they are offending other people. All are fine for them as long as they are happy.

"I used it to pay for our electricity and water bills! Alright?!" she yelled.

But my mind won't accept any of it.

"You used it for your bills. Not ours. It is my money, then. I am expecting that my brother can now use water and electricity. I will collect the money if I find out that you aren't giving him the rights for what I paid for."

I pursed my lips, balled my fists, and shut the door close.

This is not the life that I signed for.

I glanced at the sky above me. The combination of white and blue clouds was now matched with yellow to red hues, the sun falling down the east where green, high mountains are peacefully resting. The incoherent wheezing of birds on the branches of the trees didn't make my ears hurt but rather hear a lullaby. Dried, fallen leaves from the trees sounded as it crashes against my shoes, making me dart my eyes at the road.

"Mommy! Daddy! Look at what I found!" A small, happy voice from a cute little boy not far from me is waving his hands. He was holding a watch, smiling from ear-to-ear, and running towards a chubby man with a round stomach.

I tilted my head.

"Mommy! Look how fast I can swing! Look! It feels like I can fly!" The harsh and continuous grating of a rusty hammock lies a laughing little girl. She has pink pigtails on her hair, the orange light from the falling sun hitting her porcelain skin, her eyes narrowing and head leaning back as her feet dance with the sway of the cradle.

Their mom and dad are sitting side-by-side on the bench, while I was standing between the gaps but a bit far, just enough to see their facial expressions.

But all of them seemed familiar, although their faces are blurry, this scene in front of me reminds me of something I saw somewhere but wasn't able to remember.

I smiled. The sun is about to set, but I am still here. They were now fixing the blanket that they used earlier, the mom of the two kids wiping their sweats away from their faces and then gets another towel to put behind their backs.

I admire how lovely they are. The man and the woman looked so in love with each other that it overflowed, making their love reflect towards their child.

They looked so happy, I said to myself. But my eyes widened when I saw a truck approaching the road they are crossing. I immediately ran towards them while shouting that they should stop and run backwards, but they seemed like they are deaf and then the next thing I knew, I am already screaming as I found the dead body of my parents lying on the ground.

"Miss!" A man's voice woke me up from my slumber. I opened my eyes as I gasped for air and tilted my head from side to side, roaming my eyes on the whole place as I searched for the dead bodies.

"Uh...Miss?" I shifted my gaze to the man at my side. His right arm was placed behind the seat in front of us. The look in his eyes told me that he was confused about my sudden demeanor.

He pointed at the seat beside me. And that was when I had been reminded that I am inside a bus.

"Can I seat here?" He asked as he glanced at the other occupied seats.

My eyes darted at him for some seconds. The same man that I met last week is the one in front of me. Or am I wrong?

But those pair of amethyst eyes are unique enough for his features to be etched on my mind.

I envy how it looked so calming, how it was far from the chaos hiding behind my orbs. I tilted my head to the side and glanced at the road.

Other than the small bumps and the sound of the aircon, the whole bus is silent. I closed my eyes as the lights behind the glass struck it.

I hugged myself and leaned the side of my forehead on the glass, thinking of things as to why those dreams are hunting me.

Was it because I didn't visit my parents' tomb for months? Maybe they thought I am already forgetting about them, or maybe because they are reminding me of my goals.

I closed my eyes and tried to remember the face of my brother, Terren. I don't want to forget about how he looked like when our parents are still alive.

And then I remembered how Terren changed.

The fifteen-year-old Terren Del Mariano is just someone serious and stoic. He used to tell me everything he wants to say, but now, I just know that he had been miserable.

"Miss..." I heard the same deep voice booming next to my ear.

"Miss..." My eyes remained close when I felt his hand shaking my shoulders.

I heard him sigh and stopped what he was doing, then some muffled voices.

I once again, opened my eyes when I felt him get out of the seat and the next thing I knew, I am the only one left on this bus, with a paper placed on top of my bag.

"What the hell?"

I opened the folded paper. It was actually a bus ticket, but there was something written on top saying, "At the back" so I flipped the paper and saw some letters and numbers scribbled on it.

"Miss, you got a loan under me. You pay me the next time I saw you. Yes, you need to feel grateful."

"And you have a drop of saliva falling at the side of your lip, haha. >:D"

I crumpled the paper, wrinkling my nose as I checked if what he said was true, only to find out that it's not! And I am not a messy sleeper!

I greeted my teeth and stood up when the bus stopped. I would be scolded and would have a daily income decrease if I would be late for thirty minutes!

And I even got a loan from someone I don't even know!

"Tayla! You are late! Go inside the staff room and change! We've got a lot of customers!" The manager of Talk and Chill Bar yelled.

I nodded and did as what he said, tying the apron at my back as I entered the jam-packed place.

I sighed and reached for the order papers and was about to go to the left-wing when I saw a hand raised at the beginning of the right-wing and that hand is from the same man with amethyst eyes.

My heart skipped a beat. The same thing that happened the first time I saw him here reminded me that I need to be careful. I don't want to be embarrassed again, so I just shook my head and pretended that I didn't saw him, dragging my legs towards the left-wing when I heard his voice.

"Miss! I will order!"

I can just pretend that I wasn't able to hear him because of the noise from the stage, but Ella is glancing at me from the left-wing, her lips are pointing at the man behind me, making me sigh and turn towards the man.

"What is your order, sir?" I politely asked.

Why am I even avoiding him? Sure it's not about the loan that I got. I just don't want to see his eyes and his whole face.

He smiled at me from ear to ear as he scanned me from head to toe. His arms were crossed, back leaning against the seat and legs spread apart.

"Hmm..." he put his hand under his chin and glance up the ceiling. But before he can even tell me his orders, I put the exact amount of money that I need to pay.

"I believe you are the same person from earlier, thanks for paying for me, but this is my money. Now, can I take your order?"

His eyes immediately darted at the money on top of the table, and then he glanced at me with his amused eyes.

"Woah, I am not asking you for that payment right now. Keep it for now." He laughed and pointed at some things on the menu on top of their table.

This man is a fool. Why did he even glance at the ceiling when he knows there is a written menu on their table?

"I don't accept help from the people I don't even know, Sir. Excuse me, " I uttered and placed the order slip on the counter and then went back to him with the tray.

"For a waitress, you are rude." He remarked.

I refused to look at him and just focused on putting the plates down.

"I will just remind you that you have a loan from me. You will need to pay me back once I–"

"Sorry, but didn't I give you the money earlier? I don't remember requesting a loan and I believe it would be bothersome." I furrowed my brows, losing my patience for this customer.

"I didn't take your money!" He chuckled and pushed something towards me, and there I saw the fifty peso bill I gave him earlier.

"Why are you so grumpy, Miss? And we met three times, aren't you thinking that it was destiny?"

The look on his face told me that he finds this humorous. But I got no time to laugh with him for I am inside my work.

Destiny my ass.

"Oh? You are the singer the last time we are here, right?" A man from behind spoke.

I slowly turned my head at the side, and the same nerdy-looking boy's warm smile welcomed me. He was again, wearing a loose shirt.

"Auton, why did you order something you know I don't eat?" The nerd sat beside the one with the man bun's hair, whom he pertained as Auton.

"And hey, you ordered the most expensive ones? Too much for a parsimonious." He chuckled. I excused myself and checked his orders.

I lazily turned the door of our house open. This was the last and the hardest thing that I would do as an ending for my day. I would go inside this house and will have to endure the ugly faces of the people inside here.

I strode the way to the room I am occupying and did my daily routine–adding money to my savings. But as I opened the brown envelope, I found nothing but a bunch of elementary papers.