"Start before you feel ready."
---
~ Alyssa ~
They say life is about the journey, not the destination. I couldn't agree more as I walked towards the stage in my graduation gown.
"Congratulations," The Dean said with a smile as I bowed to receive my first-class diploma in Architecture from New York University.
"Thank you," I replied, watching the camera shutter snap loudly.
Gracefully, I walked back to my friends, who all had big smiles on their faces. It had been an eventful journey with each of them.
It was only after I sat down that I realized my best friend was missing.
"Where's Cassandra?" I asked, turning to the others.
"Cassandra? She was just here," Queeneth, my friend and housemate, replied.
"Okay..." I nodded, facing forward.
Maybe she went to the restroom, I thought, waiting and gently clicking my heels against the ground as the graduation ceremony continued.
I tried my best to focus, but I couldn't. Unable to stop myself, I pulled out my phone and sent her a text.
:Where are you, Cass?
I waited but got no response.
I called... once, twice... still no reply.
What's going on? I wondered again.
In our years of being best friends and roommates, we had one rule: always answer each other's calls on the first ring. If we couldn't, we'd send a text and call back when we could. But this time, I got nothing.
Cassandra had been one of the first students to receive her diploma, yet now that it was my turn, she'd disappeared.
Had she forgotten our agreement to cheer each other on?
Though I wanted to leave, I forced myself to stay till the end, whilst cheering for my other coursemates who had endured and made it to the finish line, just like I did.
"We are graduates, Aly!" Luke hugged me tightly after the program ended.
Luke had harbored a crush on me since freshman year. Though he never admitted it, I could see it in his eyes, the tenderness and warmth that made my heart ache. Why didn't I feel anything for him?
"Aww... thank you, Luke," I said, leaning into his embrace, suddenly realizing just how much it hurt that my boyfriend, Mark, wasn't here on my big day.
Hadn't he realized how important this day was to me when he chose work over me?
"You're welcome." We broke the hug and held each other's gaze for a moment. "Stay happy, okay?"
"I will." I squeezed his palm, trying to comfort both him and myself. "I'm sorry." For all the pain and heartache I had caused you, I wanted to add, but the words got stuck in my throat. Though, I knew my expression sold me off.
"It's alright... Take care." I held him one last time before letting go.
"Goodbye, Luke." He nodded and walked away, slipping out of my sight, and probably out of my life.
It was always like that with Luke: awkwardness, pain, and heartache.
He was kind, compassionate, and understanding, everything I wanted in a partner, but my heart had room for only Mark and no one else.
"He's heading back home," I heard Grace's voice behind me. My first friend at college.
"Yes, home... back to South Africa," I repeated subconsciously.
"It's not your fault." She placed a comforting hand on my shoulder, and I nodded.
"Yes, thank you," I replied without looking at her.
---
After returning my graduation gown, which I only did after taking a million pictures with it, I began to slowly walk around campus.
The same campus I had been walking around for the past four years.
Unlike most of my peers, I enjoyed school. I enjoyed getting to know my coursemates, my lecturers, and most importantly, I loved my course, architecture. I loved learning more about buildings and designs. Though it wasn't my first choice, since I still secretly harbored a love for film and theater arts, over time I have fallen in love with design, and I'm amazed at how much I've discovered about myself through it.
I had just reached the basketball arena when I caught sight of something-or someone-out of the corner of my eye.
Curly blond hair, pale skin...
"Mark?" I thought as I slowly approached, my chest beating fast.
As I got closer, I realized he was holding someone; no, they were kissing.
Sandy brown hair, jade-like skin, long legs. I noted the lady's features.
A tear dropped from my eye as realization hit me.
"Mark," I whimpered, and they separated immediately, as if my voice had caused an earthquake. Or maybe it did.
"Aly!" They stared at me in shock, guilt flashing across their faces.
"How long?" I asked, my voice shaky.
I had always heard about best friends betraying one other, but I assumed it was all fiction, something that would never happen to me. But who knew?
"Four years..." Mark replied, pulling her closer. My heart sank.
"The truth is, I met him before you did, Aly," Cassandra Clare announced matter-of-factly.
"And...?" My head felt foggy. I wasn't thinking straight. What the hell was going on here?
"Cassandra has always been the one for me, Aly-the one I love, the one my heart beats for, and the one I want to spend my life with."
"And I am?"
"Just a plaything," Cass spat.
Suddenly, I couldn't recognize the girl in front of me.
Is this the same girl I had called my best friend for over three years? The one who promised to always be there for me and never let go?
"What do you mean?" I stared at both of them, my heart sinking with dread.
Please, don't let my worst fear come true.
...
A/N: What do you think of this chapter, guys?
"I believe everything happens for a reason."
***
~ Alyssa ~
"What do you mean?" I stared at them, dumbfounded and unable to utter a word.
"You are so gullible, Aly!" Mark spat, his words harsh and piercing.
I stared at them both in confusion.
"Oh... you still haven't figured it out yet?" Cassandra closed the distance between us and began to pace around me like the proud peacock that she was.
"Mark needed to build his architectural firm, and despite not having a degree in architecture, he was able to. Have you thought about how that happened?" It felt like I was suddenly slapped back to reality as I opened my mouth to speak... but closed it, like a fish plucked from water.
I couldn't believe my eyes or ears. "You used me?" My gaze met Mark's, my first ever boyfriend, the one who I believed taught me how to love and believe in love despite everything I had gone through.
"What does it look like?" His gaze, as sharp as his words, as Cassandra walked back into his arms. "Do you really think I was dating you for your body? The same one you never gave to me, claiming you promised yourself you'd wait for marriage before engaging in any sort of intimacy?"
"So you used me for her?" I stared at Cassandra now, really looking at her as she stood there, not as my best friend, but as Mark's lover. Her skin was pale, her lips curvy and seductive. She had a well-defined body with curves and always made sure to flaunt it in tight-fitting clothes. Unlike me, who went around in jeans and tops because they made me comfortable.
I have never doubted Cassandra's acting skills, but at this point... she could easily win an Oscar.
"I have never loved you, Alyssa! Cassy has always been my first love and will always be," Mark replied. Tears threatened to spill from my eyes, but I refused to let them. I tightened my fists behind me.
"I thought we were best friends, Cassandra! I assumed you cared about me." My words shook as I thought of the times I had revealed my plans, goals, and the development of my relationship with Mark to her. She had seemed so supportive and kind. But who would have thought?
"Best friends? With you? An orphan who has nobody to call her own?" Her words cut deeper than I anticipated.
My orphaned state had always been a sore topic, and we rarely mentioned, until now.
"Do you think you'd have been able to attend a prestigious university like this if the government hadn't taken pity on you and granted you a scholarship? Do you?" I could only stare at her as she slowly advanced toward me.
"So... all those times when you stayed out late, you were with Mark?" I asked instead, attempting to confirm my doubts.
"What do you think? That I'd spend nights with an orphaned girl like you when I could be out making love to my boy-?" My palms acted on their own, slapping her face before she could complete her sentence.
"What the hell, Alyssa!" Mark's angry voice followed as he rushed toward Cassandra and pulled her into his arms while she glared hatefully at me.
"Does it hurt, Cassy?" I asked with a smile, noticing the redness blooming on her pale cheeks.
"You bitch!" She tried rushing toward me, but Mark surprisingly held her back.
"Oh... it hurts?" I smiled again as I stared at them both.
"Enough, Alyssa! You've done enough! You will not say another word to hurt Cassy!" His words stung more than I'd like to admit.
Mark had always been gentle and kind to me. He'd never raised his voice at me, even when angry. He was the ideal boyfriend I had always wanted. At a point, I feared he was love bombing me, but my doubts quickly faded after Cassandra assured me that it wasn't the case. But what if that was indeed the truth?
"And I will no longer design buildings for your company!" The words flew out of my mouth before I could stop them, realizing too late how foolish I sounded when I caught their smirks.
"What?!"
"It seems you've forgotten about the contract you signed with us, Alyssa." I didn't let the "us" in her statement affect me; that was definitely the least of my concerns. "What contract?"
"I have always known you were naive, Alyssa. But who would have thought you'd be stupid too?" She cackled, her laughter echoing through the quiet arena. I raised an eyebrow, quietly waiting for their answer.
"The contract you signed states that you lose the rights to the shares of the company the moment you stop working for us."
What the hell!
As if their betrayal wasn't enough, I would still lose rights over the company I had helped build with him!
"And you made me sign that?" I thought of those moments when I had felt so loved and cared for. Were those moments a lie? Or were they simply a figment of my imagination?
"What do you think, stupid Alyssa?"
"You will both pay for this!" I ran out of the arena and didn't stop until I reached our shared apartment.
It wasn't until I shut the door behind me that I finally let the tears fall. How could I have been so foolish and gullible to fall for a lie?
I stared at the promissory ring on my finger as tears streamed down my face. Mark had promised that we'd get married as soon as we graduated, yet he hadn't even thought of an engagement ring, nor had he officially asked me to marry him.
It all sounded absurd until Cassandra coerced me into believing it was normal and that he'd ask me eventually. I fell for that! How stupid of me.
"Mom, am I really that foolish?" I gazed at the framed picture on the wall, my gaze blurred by tears. It was a photograph of a woman I was told was my mom when I left the orphanage four years ago.
"Is that why you abandoned me at birth?" Mom had died immediately after I was born, due to a nurse's insensitivity. Who tells a newly operated woman that her husband died in a car crash with his girlfriend? Who does that?
The sound of my phone ringing interrupted my thoughts. I reached into my pocket and pulled it out.
It was the hostel manager.
I answered the call without thinking, already predicting how the conversation would go.
"Hey, Alyssa. I believe you are okay."
"I am," I replied in a small voice. If she noticed the hoarseness in my tone, she didn't mention it.
"Good. As you know, your time here ends today, and you've got 24 hours to vacate the hostel."
"Okay, Mrs.," I acknowledged.
"Good. Also, congratulations on your graduation." I nodded, even though she wasn't in front of me.
"Yes, yes... thank you." The call ended, and I realized how pathetic my situation really was. The plan had always been to move in with Mark after graduation. But now? I had to find an apartment, a job, and all of that.
And most importantly,
How exactly was I going to survive the next few days in New York City with barely any savings? How?
....
A/N: I hope you are enjoying the story so far, guys! Because I am!
"Life feels different when you are in love."
....
~ Austin ~
"Sir, you've got a meeting with the embezzlement client by 3pm today." my assistant, Jordan, announced.
I nodded at him with a smile; he had clearly taken my advice on referring to clients by their case types. Though I'm generally organized, I sometimes miss the finer details. That's precisely why I hired an assistant.
"Anything else?" I asked, noticing that Jordan was still standing in front of me with an awkward expression.
"Well..." He began scratching his chocolate brown hair, and I immediately sensed he was up to no good.
"Speak."
"Your grandma has set you up on a blind date with one of her best friend's granddaughters."
'Not again!' I thought. However, I kept a blank facade.
"When is the date and time?" I inquired, but he hesitated, and I had a bad feeling, yet again.
"Tonight?" He gave me an awkward smile, and I thought, if Jordan hadn't been my friend from college, I would have definitely thrown him out.
Just then, my cellphone rang. I glanced at the caller ID and waved Jordan off, signaling him to leave.
He exited, looking rather pleased with himself.
I shook my head as I picked up the call.
"Hello, Nana!"
"Hello to you too, dearest Austin!" Her voice was filled with life and vigor, still as lively as ever at eighty.
"How are you?" I asked.
"You do know I will only be completely fine when you finally find a bride?" I shut my eyes at the reminder. Not again!
"But, Nana... I-"
"I know, I know. But it's been two years. Don't you think it's time you moved on?" I sighed.
"Besides, don't you think Keren needs a mother figure in her life?"
"She doesn't, Nana! She has a live-in nanny who attends to all her needs!" I emphasized the words, "all her needs."
"I know, I know. But a live-in nanny will never be able to compare to a real mom!" Her voice echoed through the phone. "And you know that!"
I pinched the space between my eyebrows with my free hand, letting out a sigh. "So... what do you suggest?"
"Well." I could almost visualize her smiling on the other end. I imagined Nana had been a matchmaker in her earlier years, as she seemed really good at it.
"I've scheduled a blind date for you and my best friend's granddaughter, Vivian Howard, tonight at Skyline's rooftop restaurant." I nodded, already guessing why she'd chosen that particular restaurant. Nana had always insisted that couples who met, or had their first date, at Skyline's restaurant ended up spending decades together in harmony.
"Okay. What time?"
"7 PM."
"Hmm..."
"And remember-"
"Be there early, dress properly, and make a good first impression," I interrupted her, not interested in hearing her go on about how those three things led her to choose my grandfather as her husband.
"Good, good. Remember to call me to update me on how it went."
"Will do!"
"Have fun, Aus!"
"I will." I hung up the phone, only to pick it up again after a quick glance at my wristwatch.
I dialed the number of Keren's live-in nanny, and she picked up on the first ring, just as I had always demanded.
"Good afternoon, Mr. Austin." Her voice sounded a bit shaky and odd, but I decided to ignore it and get to the point.
"Is my daughter there?"
"Yes, yes, sir... but she's currently asleep."
"Hm..." I contemplated before saying, "Let me see her." I switched the call to a video call, and soon, little Keren appeared on the screen, sound asleep in her extra large crib.
"Any issues?"
"No, Sir. We had a smooth day today."
"Okay then."
"I will be out until 9 PM. Will she be fine with you until then?"
"Sure, Sir."
"Good." Without waiting for her to respond, I ended the call.
Was I too harsh or strict? Maybe.
But I knew I could never be too careful when it came to Keren...
Not when she is... I let out a deep sigh as a memory flashed before my eyes.
....
7 PM, Skyline, Rooftop Restaurant.
I swirled the chardonnay in my glass as I began to hear the sound of heels clicking on the ground. Slowly, Vivian Howard came into view.
She was as beautiful as Nana had described, but not as beautiful as...
I stood up with a smile when she reached my table. "Austin Hook," I said, reaching out my hand.
Her face lit up with a smile as she took my hand. "Vivian Howard." I nodded as she took a seat.
"Have you ordered?" Her voice was soft, maybe too soft for my liking.
"No. I'll let you do the honors."
"Okay." She picked up the menu and started browsing. After a moment, she called the waiter and ordered seafood. Really?
Hadn't she considered that I might be allergic to that?
"I hope you aren't allergic to seafood," she said.
"Not that I know of."
"Great."
"So tell me about yourself, Austin," she said after another moment of silence. I could already guess that she was the talkative type, and well... I wasn't surprised.
"Nothing much. As you might have figured, I am a criminal defense attorney with a law firm by day and a single dad by night."
"Oh... I am really sorry about Joanna..." Her expression shifted to one of concern, and I sighed. Didn't people realize that saying "sorry" doesn't really ease the pain? It only serves as a reminder of how deep the wound is and how much it still hurts.
"It's okay. Tell me about yourself."
"Well, I am-" The waiter returned with her drink order, interrupting her. Classic Margarita. I noted.
"Your orders will be ready in ten minutes," the waiter said before leaving. We both nodded.
"Okay, as I was saying..."
"Continue," I urged, raising my glass.
"I'm a supermodel based in Paris, but my parents live here, so I'm always moving back and forth."
"Um... okay," I said, suddenly unsure of how to continue the conversation.
"I have a flexible schedule and a considerate manager."
"Okay." I watched as she sipped her drink gracefully.
"Have you ever been in a relationship?"
"In college, yes. But I haven't had time to go on dates until now." She batted her eyelashes in a way I considered seductive, but I chose not to comment on that.
"What are your expectations from a relationship?"
"Well..." She smiled, and I sensed she was about to make her pitch. "Security."
"Hmm... and what do you mean by security?"
"As you know, it means money, wealth, power, and protection."
"You do know I have a daughter, right?" I noticed her eyes widen at that mention. "Yes, I do... She should be around three years old now, right?"
"Three and a half."
"Yes, yes... but she shouldn't be a problem. We can simply hire a live-in nanny to take care of her."
"Hm..." I nodded as our food was served. The sight of the seafood made me feel nauseous, but I was grateful the waiter followed my instructions and brought me spaghetti and meatballs instead.
"You..." Her face turned red in embarrassment at my order, and I didn't feel the need to ease her discomfort as I simply focused on my dinner in silence.
Midway through the meal, I was interrupted by a commotion downstairs.
I raised an eyebrow, silently wondering what the disturbance was all about.
...
A/N: What do you think the commotion is all about, guys?