Teach Me To Sin

"I don't get it," I tossed my phone on my bed and groaned in frustration, "He isn't replying my texts and he's not answering the phone either."

Nico, my college roommate and one of my best friends sighed as he spun himself around on the spinning chair placed next to the study desk.

"Dude, it's obvious that he's blowing you off and probably blowing on some other guy while he's at it"

I tossed a pillow at him and he laughed as it made contact with his face.

"Don't say that" I scolded, "Julius likes me way too much to do any of that"

Nico shook his head and hugged the pillow. "You know you can do way better than him, right?"

Better than Julius? He was the golden boy of Heldon college and indisputably one of the wealthiest and most attractive guy on campus.

Not to mention how he touched me the way nobody else could. It was so easy for him to see through me and turn me on.

So who exactly is supposed to be better than him? I could hardly think of any other person. Plus, I had feelings for him.

"I don't know why you keep acting like he's the spawn of the devil. Julius is a good guy" I defended my boyfriend.

"I don't know many good guys who act the way he does. Has he decided to make your relationship official and open yet?"

"Not yet, but he...."

"And he's blowing you off on top of all of it"

"These things take time, Nico. It's not exactly easy to come out of the closet. Plus, his folks are super strict and religious"

"I bet they are" Nico responded sarcastically.

"They actually are. He just doesn't want to get in trouble with them because of me. He's really a good guy if you take the time to know him"

"I know Julius and he's an arrogant prick," he tossed the pillow at me and i caught it, "You, on the other hand need to get to meet new people. Who knows, you could meet a cute guy that doesn't hide you"

"Julius isn't hiding me"

"I bet you a thousand dollars that he is" I scoffed at him and rolled my eyes.

"Get off my dick, Nico. You're not exactly the best at this love thing seeing as you and Rita still don't know what you are"

"Rita and I are a completely separate situation and you know that" I folded my arms.

"Yeah right. You've been in love with her for years and all you two do is make out. Hello, give it a tag already"

"I want to. She's the one whose scared of commitment. Her sister's divorce did a number on her"

"Was it that bad?"

"Bad enough for her to never trust a word that comes out of a man's mouth"

I sighed and lay back on one of the two large beds that was provided for Nico and I in our standardized dorm room.

Rita was a wonderful person and an even better friend.

It sucked that she was not willing to take a shot at love especially with Nico.

He may be a tad annoying but he was a great guy with even better intentions.

"So what really happened?" I asked. He shrugged.

"Don't know, man. Not my story to tell" I understood.

"Hey, maybe I should stop by his dorm and see what he's up to" I blurted out.

"Stop by where?" He asked like he didn't already know.

"Julius' private dorm" I replied Nico scoffed and shook his head

. "And the asshole even has a private dorm" he murmured.

"Don't be jealous, Nico. Your family is pretty rich as well"

He shook his head. "It's not about that. I told you that he was an arrogant prick."

It was my turn to roll my eyes. Nico always had something negative to say about Julius.

He was usually nice to other people but it was a load of criticism and accusations when it came to Julius.

"Do you think you can take me there?" I asked and Nico froze and stared at me.

"What?"

"I... well, look, Nico I don't want to go alone"

"You're about to make me very uncomfortable, Alex"

"I know and I'm so sorry but..."

"You do know that I really don't like this guy right?"

I hated that i was dragging him into this but i was losing my mind here. I needed to know if my boyfriend is trying to silently dump me..

"I just want to find out what's wrong with us and why he's been avoiding me"

Nico rose to his feet, his curly hair bounced on his shoulders.

"Or I could tell you what is really going on and we could save us so much time" I got up and picked up my jacket and wallet.

"It's fine," I said as I put on the jacket, "I'll see you very soon" Nico called out for me as i was headed for the door.

"Dude, are you serious? You really could be chilling and watching demon slayer right now"

I turned to face him; there wasn't a smile on my face. "Will you help me or not?"

Nico studied me for a moment and slumped his shoulders in defeat.

"Whatever, dude. Let me grab my keys"

My face lit up as I watched him grab his car keys and throw on a hoodie to ward off the cold outside.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you"

I was glad that I didn't have to go alone just in case my intuition was right and Julius was over what we had.

I really did hope that I was wrong though. Besides, I don't think I'm ready to live a life without him in it.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not walking you into his so called private dorm just so you know" He dragged the words private dorm.

"It's fine. Can we please leave already?"

"Yeah, come on"

I grabbed Nico's hand and pulled him out of the dorm room and he followed with very little resistance.

Heldon College was built in the early 90s as a private university for the children of the elite. You had to come from a long line of money to attend but I was the exception.

I was an orphan desperately searching for a way out of the foster home system when I received a mail that I had been granted a scholarship into Heldon College.

Only one in a thousand students got that opportunity and I was lucky enough to have it.

All the financial aspects of schooling at Heldon was taken care of. I didn't have to worry about that.

The only thing that was expected of me were good grades and behavior. Four years at Heldon and I have to admit that asides having to deal with the intense feelings of being an outsider, I love it here.

Nico and I were in his car and on our way to where Julius stayed. The campus was as large as a small town and had all the things you'd find in such places.

Because of how large the school area was, it was usually best to drive to your destination as walking, unless you were walking with someone, was very tiring.

Nico observed me sending Julius another unanswered text.

"Still no word from him yet?" He asked. I shook my head and put the phone in my jacket pocket.

"I don't get it. Why is he acting this way? It's not like we got into a fight or something. Do you think he's mad at me?"

Nico took a left turn. "Did you do anything to make him mad at you?" He asked.

"Not that I know of anyway. Maybe he's in some kind of trouble"

"I highly doubt that's the issue here but okay"

"Can you please stop being a condescending ass hat for a minute? You're not fucking helping" Nico sighed.

"You're right. I'm sorry okay. Let me just take you to go see your boyfriend so you can get the answers that you need" I looked out the window.

"Yeah" Nothing was said anymore and I simply kept my gaze outside while he drove.

We had arrived at the private dorm where Julius lived and Nico parked the car. Our dorms were usually shaped like mini bungalows.

Two students got to share the house like dorms but Julius had his own private quarters. It was one of the various testaments to the wealth of his family.

He liked to live like a prince and his mother made sure that he did.

"Tell me again why this guy gets to have his own private dorm" Nico said.

"I don't know, Nico. He's a nepo baby with a mom with enough money to toss around," I unlocked my side of the door, "I'll be back in a minute" Nico placed his hand on mine and I stopped to look at him.

"Hey, Alex?" "If you need anything just call me."

"You're leaving?"

"Nah. I'll be right here when you walk out that door" I nodded and gave him a small kiss on the cheek and he frowned playfully.

"Thank you, Nico"

"Yeah, yeah. Go on and meet your weirdo boyfriend" He gently pushed me out of his car and after giving him a small wave, I jogged to the front door.

My heart was racing and my stomach was unsettled. I couldn't wait to see Julius. My Julius.

I rang the doorbell a few times until the door finally swung open and standing there in one of Julius' large shirts was a tall, pretty girl with small eyes and dark hair tied in a messy bun.

I blinked a few times as I took in what I was seeing. I quickly turned back to see if Nico was seeing what I was seeing.

He was. He also had the most obvious what-the-hell expression on his face. Who exactly was this chick and why was she wearing my boyfriend's clothes and parading half naked around his dorm?

"Can I help you?" The girl asked me as she sized me up. She didn't even have the decency to make it subtle.

"Where is Julius?" I asked, "I need to speak to him"

"Why?" She asked with her arms folded. "Ever heard of a private conversation?"

"Ever heard of being polite when you show up to someone's front door?"

"Yeah, except this isn't your front door so what exactly is your problem?"

"Sophie?" I heard Julius call out from inside, "What's going on?"

"Someone's here to see you!" I yelled out.

Julius walked over to the front door with a towel wrapped around his waist. He didn't even flinch when he saw me standing there with eyes begging for an explanation.

"Sophia, please excuse us" He said to the girl. "Why? Hiding something from me?" She asked.

"Just get inside so he and I can talk" The girl gave me a nasty look and walked away. I tried to step into the house so I could speak to Julius but he stood in my way.

"Julius? What the hell are you doing? Let me in so we can talk"

He sighed and rubbed his eyes.

"Look, this isn't a good time"

"What the hell are you even saying? You don't respond to texts, you don't call me back and now there's some tramp walking around in your shirt! You're supposed to be my boyfriend"

He quickly stepped outside and shut the door behind him.

"Yo, keep your voice down. What the hell is your problem?"

"You're my fucking problem, Julius! You!"

"Alex, chill out already"

I took in a shaky breath. My head was starting to hurt.

"Who is she?"

"Who?"

"Don't fucking play with me, Julius!" He sighed.

"That's Sophia"

"Let me guess, she's the reason you've been blowing me off for weeks now."

"It's not even like that, Alex"

"You told me you loved me, Julius. You said that you were going to come out of the closet and we'd finally be together"

"I still love you okay. But come on, Alex put yourself in my shoes. I can't have people finding out that I like boys"

"Wow, Julius"

My heart broke with each word that came out of his mouth.

"Plus, even if I wanted to come out of the closet, it has to be with someone with an actual background and not some...."

"Broke foster kid? Like me?"

"Alex, it's really not my fault. You know how these things can be. I'm also doing this for you as well"

My legs felt weak and it was getting harder to stop myself from crying.

"I have to go" I turned and began heading back to Nico's car when I felt Julius grab my arm.

"Hey, you better not go around telling people that we had a thing together. It was nothing and nobody is going to believe you over...."

"Hey!" Nico got out of the car and charged towards Julius, "Get your hands off him right now!"

Julius immediately let me go and I rushed over to Nico's side.

"You okay?" Nico asked me and I nodded.

"Can we please leave. You were right about everything"

"Of course. Let's go"

Nico nodded and quietly led me me to the car. As we drove off I saw through the side mirror as Sophia came to ask Julius to come back inside.

"Is he still feeling like crap?"

Rita asked as she walked into I and Nico's dorm room with a somewhat large vanilla cake she had bought.

I rolled over on my bed and covered my head with a blanket. It had been a week since that night with Julius.

Safe to say that I have been severely under the weather. It didn't make sense for him to act that way.

Was it something I did? Was it because I was an orphan with no money to my name? This was my first relationship and I hated that it had to end the way that it did.

Nico sighed.

"He's been this way for a while now. I don't think he's been going for any of his classes"

"I don't want to go. What's the point when I know that I'm going to bump into him again?" I asked and fought back tears.

I had cried so much that I was certain that any more tears would make me ill.

Rita sat on my bed and gently stroked my covered head. She was always a nice person and as much as I was grateful for her and Nico trying to cheer me up, I really wanted to be alone.

"I get that you're hurting right now but hiding in your dorm room isn't going to do any good"

"Yes, it will" I insisted.

"Do you think that douchebag is in his private dorm room crying and feeling like shit right now?" Nico asked.

"I hope so" I said. I really wanted him to come back with a huge romantic gesture and an apology.

There was no way that we were actually over right? God, I missed Julius so much.

"I can tell for free that he's not," Nico responded, "I bet that he's busy banging his new girlfriend"

"I heard that he's dating Sophia Burgundy now," Rita said, "Isn't she on the drama team?"

"Yeah and she's also the bitch that bullied my baby cousin in high school"

"Oh my goodness," Rita exclaimed, "She's the bitch?"

"Yup"

"It's always the pretty ones isn't it?"

I sat up on my bed and pushed the blanket off my body.

"Can we please not talk about how my ex boyfriend's new girlfriend is pretty and perfect"

"She is definitely far from either of those two options" Nico said.

"She's rich too" I added.

"So what?" He asked I rolled my eyes and pulled my knees to my chest.

I couldn't care less what they thought about the new girlfriend, I just wanted to stop feeling so shitty.

"Do you want some cake? I heard you like to snack on it when you're stressed" Rita carried the cake off the desk and placed it on the bed. There was a fork and butter knife already set. I flashed Rita a grateful smile.

She was such a darling.

"Thanks, Rita"

"You're welcome. You know, I'm really sorry about the way that things turned out between you and Julius. I know you really liked him" I shrug and begin eating the cake.

"Can you believe that he said that he couldn't have people thinking that he was into boys?" I asked.

"After all the time that you two spend together, I'm pretty sure a few people already know he's into boys"

"That's most likely the reason that he's dating Sophia now," Nico added, "He's trying to get people to quit suspecting him"

I groaned out in frustration. Love sucks. Rita wrapped her arms around my shoulder and rubbed my arm comfortingly.

"I'm so sorry, Alex"

"It doesn't matter," I replied, "I should have listened to the both of you from day one"

"That doesn't even matter at all, he dude" Nico said and I nodded. "You know what, I have just the thing to make you feel better" Rita announced.

"Please don't say a party" I pleaded. Rita giggled.

"Come on, it'll be fun," she urged, "A really big influencer is throwing it. You know, we can all try a little bit of molly while we're at it" she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

I chuckled at the mention of the drug. The thing with Rita was that you could never really tell if she was messing around or not.

"I second that," Nico said, "both the party and the drugs"

"You two are such horrible influences" I said and they both laughed.

"But, for real though," Nico began, "I really think a change of scenery will do you some good"

"And the drugs?" I asked with a raised brow.

"We'll cross that bridge when we get there" Rita said as she gently placed the cake aside so she could lay her head on my lap.

"I don't know you guys, I really just want to eat ice cream and cry" I protested.

Why wouldn't they just let me be sad in peace?

"Well, there isn't any ice cream but you can eat some cake and cry. When you're done, we can all get ready to go to the party"

"Rita, everyone knows you need special invites to get into places like that. We don't even have invites" I said and she smirked.

"You forget that my brother is one of the biggest influencers ever and a lot of these other influencers want to get on his good side by doing me favors" she explained.

"And I'm guessing one of those favors include VIP passes at the big parties?" Nico asked.

"For me and my squad" She replied with a smile. "What do you say, Alex?" He asked me and I looked up at both of them.

Maybe they were right and I needed to start accepting what had happened and find ways to deal with it.

"I don't know, you guys"

"Come on, Alex," Rita shook me a little, "loosen up a little. It'll be great"

"You sure?" I asked and she nodded.

"Absolutely," she assured, "plus, what's the worst that could happen?"

"Don't jinx it" I said and she chuckled.

"Of course, of course. Soooo does that mean that you'll be coming?" She asked.

"Yeah, I suppose so"

"What about you, Nico?" She asked as she held eye contact with him, "I could really use a dance partner you know" He scratched the back of his neck and chuckled.

"I guess that I could come along" he replied, his face had turned to a lighter shade of red.

"Great," she exclaimed, "We're going to a party!"