Tainted Desires.

Jax watches as her hips swing from side to side, her body moving to the music, her eyes taunting him, and she knew it. He watches as she saunters towards him, her hips swinging as she does. Stopping in front of him, she smiles. Jax stands, watching as Melodie comes to a stop in front of him with her hand on her hip. Her tongue gently strokes over her lip as she smiles at him.

"Dance?" she teases as her hand reaches out. Jax stays with his back against the wall as he shakes his head.

"Go play with the other babies, Melodie. Big guys will only make you get hurt." Jax says.

She snickers at him as she walks back through the bar, dancing with her friends again. She wasn't fooled: she could clearly see his cock straining beneath his jeans. Damn, Lucas and his annoying disappearing acts! Even now, on her eighteenth birthday, he hasn't shown his face. Jax shakes his head, watching as she dances, the guys flocking around her. His teeth grind down as he fights the urge to pull them off her.

"Thanks for this. How mad is she?"

Jax turns to see Lucas, his head shaking as he does. "About time! I have a life myself you know, Lucas."

Lucas nods, his head tilting to the side. "She is my daughter, Jax. You don't need to watch over her. Hell, I doubt anyone will ever need to watch her. No one is forcing you to babysit. You took that upon yourself." Lucas is standing looking at Jax, waiting.

"Let her think her own father forgot her birthday? Not even I am that cold-hearted, Lucas. As the text said, I told her this was all you, so she won't mind you being late. Have fun." Jax turns and walks away, catching Melodie smiling at him as he walks through the crowds.

He has to protect her. He feels his own head shaking in delusion. He doesn't have to; he feels he needs to. If she dies, he will go on a murderous hunt to kill people. Standing outside the club, the cold air whips around him as he takes out his phone, looking at the messages.

Roxanne will no doubt be asleep - his sweet, loving wife. If only she still saw him as her husband. He smiles slightly as he turns on his heels and heads to his apartment. Tonight, he needs more, that more being Heidi, his submissive. He knows she can easily take the edge of his feelings off him if he allows himself. He can't deny it. Something about Melodie has him wanting her more than he even wanted his wife, and that scares him. He has enough to deal with when he leaves with Roxanne and Heidi crying at his feet. He can't add another woman on top of that, not that he would. Well, Roxanne has moved on. She no longer cries when he leaves. He just needs to accept it and break free of her ways.

Roxanne had agreed to one submissive. She was happy with him having that submissive to get everything he needs that she can't give. He loves Roxanne too much to walk away, but he can't seem to stay away from Melodie and not try to protect her when he returns from his missions. Hell, he can't have her thinking her dad is a jerk that forgot her birthday either.

A small laugh escapes his mouth as he realises Lucas would shoot him dead if he knew the thoughts he had about his lovely Melodie. Lucas is like his brother. His teammate. Sure he is twenty-seven, and Lucas is forty, but they are still close. That would go if Lucas found out he wanted Melodie.

Two Years Later

Shaking his head, Jax watches as Melodie purposely leans over the counter in nothing but a short shirt showing her ass.

"He's late." She turns to face him and takes a bite from the waffle she holds. Jax nods. What did she expect? "You can leave. You don't need to sit and watch me until he walks back through that damn door like you always do, Jax. I ain't a child."

His laugh echoes around the kitchen. "No, you sure as hell ain't, Mel. You're more a baby than a child. One who can't be trusted." He watches as her feet stamp on the floor, his head shaking. Great, now he has to deal with her anger.

"I ain't no child, and I sure as hell ain't a baby, Jax. What's up? Scared that if you admit I'm no longer a child, you might just give in to your cock getting hard for me?"

He glares up at her. Damn, she is hot when she is mad! "Wouldn't give in. The temptation isn't everything, Mel. I value my marriage over your body." He stands up from the table and walks further away from her, watching as her eyes follow him.

"You're just as bad as Dad. Both of you, you walk in, scare away any guy who looks at me, dictate what I can and can't do, and then fuck off back to your own lives. Fuck you both!" Her words are loud, yet he can see the pain in her eyes, the tears threatening to come to the surface.

"We're keeping you safe, Melodie, come on. You know the shit me and your dad face. You know how easily anyone of those guys could decide to get revenge by coming to his sweet, innocent, stupid fucking daughter."

He is irritated. The guys were all jerks, all of them. She deserves someone better.

Her snicker shocks him, his head whipping up to look at her confused.

"You tell yourself that's why, big boy. I'm no fool. My dad doesn't want a guy near me as he still thinks I am his innocent little girl, and you, well, you get jealous when a guy looks at me, so knowing I am fucking them just eats at you until you push them away." She stands staring at him. He knows she is right, partly, but he can't let her win.

"Melodie, I don't give a shit who fucks you or where they fuck you. You getting hurt or killed will kill your dad, and he's a friend. There's nothing more. It's all in your fucking head." He goes to leave, her hand stopping him as tears fill her eyes. He can't. Damn her and her crying.

"Why do you fight it? I know, Jax. I know about your marriage, about your submissives. Rather, I should have said I know who your submissives are. I have seen you at the parties; each of them resembles me. You can't seem to scratch that itch with them though, can you?"

Damn, this woman! How the hell did she know? He stands staring at her.

"I'm no fool, Jax. You and Dad go to your fancy parties. He takes his little submissive, and you take yours. You see, while you two happily walk around without a mask, I don't. I put one on and watch."

His eyes widen at her.

"How the hell did you find that place or even get in?" She shouldn't have found out about it. Lucas always made sure it was hidden from her.

"I'm good at following people, Jax, very good. I saw you last night, all alone, looking for that submissive that could be me."

He looks at her, laughing, which only seems to make her anger worse. Her hands push against his chest. "Don't you dare laugh at me, Jax! Why watch when you can fucking touch?"

He nods, smiling. "Because I don't want to touch, Melodie. You're nothing but a baby spitting her dummy out, and it won't work. You wouldn't last one night as my submissive. Your bratty fucking attitude would have you screaming while I whip your ass." He goes to walk around her, her body once again moving into his path.

"Please, Jax. I am not a child or a baby. I will fucking prove it. I mean it."

He tilts his head to the side, a humorous expression crossing his face. "How so? How do you plan to prove it?" She can't. Hell, she can parade her boyfriends in front of him but they were all children, just like her. She shouldn't have gone to those parties. She's too innocent for them.

"I'll go back there tonight. Hell, Jax, I will dance in that green corner like I need it and just wait to see which Dom steps forward first to try to claim me as his own, and I won't say no." His eyes widen at her. What is she playing at? "One kiss, Jax. One fucking kiss, then you can leave and I will stay the hell away."

He stands staring at her, his heart racing. "Not happening. I love Roxanne. I won't do that to her." He goes to turn, her hands grasping him.

"Do what to her? You don't have a submissive, Jax. I know that, so use me. Use me right now and just fucking kiss me, or I swear to god I won't be sleeping alone tonight." Her breath catches in her throat as his lips suddenly press against hers. A cry shakes through her throat as his kiss is forceful. She tastes perfect, her lips like silk and soft. Their tongues dance together. Jax's hand's ball into fists to stop his hands from grasping her and pulling her closer. If he was to do that, he wouldn't walk away until he has taken all of her. A groan escapes his mouth as he steps back, a smile forming on her face.

"Stay the hell away from there, Melodie! it's not for kids." She smiles slightly, happy that she has gone from a baby to a kid in his eyes, but more that she knows now he has kissed her, he will want it again.

"And if I don't, Jax?" The smile tells him she is teasing, his eyes looking at her. "Will you go around and take off all the women's masks just to see if it is me?" Would he? Hell yes, he would, if he doubted for a moment she was there.

"Simple, Melodie, I will just ensure you're banned for life, and then you can't step foot inside there again." Her eyes widen at his words.

"Behave and stay the hell away from that place, Melodie, because I swear, if I so much as get told you were there, you won't be allowed back in." He turns and walks towards the door. Her screams are loud behind him as she protests.

"Running scared from a baby are you, Jax? Big man Jax running away because he is scared he will kiss me again." She feels her body get thrown against the wall by him, his hands holding her there, his breathing hitched. He closes his eyes. Damn her and her anger making him want to fuck it out of her!

"Enough, Melodie! You won't like this side of me. I'm gone. You don't think you need protecting, well fine. You won't see this face again." She stares at him, her lip quivering. Oh damn. His eyes close. If she cries, he won't leave. Turning with his eyes shut, he runs out of the house. He can't do it. He can't see her cry and leave and never come back to check on her. He needs to though.

Climbing in his car, he pulls out of the garden and speeds off.

This weekend will be dull. Roxanne is at her parents so he is alone. He drives to the familiar building. Walking in as always, he is greeted with nothing but smiles and warm welcomes. He stalks to the bar and orders a drink, his head shaking as he downs it.

"You look worse than usual man, you okay?" Jax turns to face Lucas.

"You were here? What the fuck, Lucas! Melodie is sitting waiting for you at home! I told her you were due back in the country this morning." Jax shakes his head. He went straight to check on Melodie when he got back three days ago, but he knew Lucas wasn't back until this morning.

"I spoke to her. She has plans tonight and told me not to waste my time going home. Apparently, things are getting more serious with that Jake guy." Jax looks at Lucas. He thought he had scared him off.

"And you're not stopping it?" Jax stares at him shocked, as Lucas shakes his head. "She will get hurt, Lucas. That's your fucking daughter!"

He laughs and nods at Jax, which only irritates him more.

"And she will heal. Come on, Jax. I have been chasing away guys for years. All it's done is make me hurt her. Maybe having her heart broken by a guy who just wants to fuck her will help make her see that her wild nights out hoping she finds love won't work."

Jax stares at him. How could he be so cold? "You would honestly just sit here, knowing that tonight he will be fucking her, only to walk away straight after and never call her again? That's your damn daughter, Lucas."

Lucas nods, laughing. "I will because I know Melodie, Jax. When it comes to her seeing him in the street after he ignores her, she will have his balls as earrings. She isn't a weak girl, you know that, Jax." He does, but the thought of her crying, hurting, rips his heart open.

"So, what's up with you anyway?" Lucas moves and sits next to him, Jax shaking his head. Like he can tell him.

"The usual: can't find the right submissive for me."

Lucas smiles at Jax as he nods. "Speaking of submissives, I should go find my little pet. I have left her alone for a little longer than I wanted." He turns and walks away.

Jax looks out onto the dance floor, his eyes observing the women as they dance, slowly walking towards them. He stops, his gaze settling on a woman dancing.

"Let me guess, black leather skirt?" Jax turns to the familiar sound of Alex. He looks at him, confused by his words.

"Come on, Jax, your submissives, they all look alike. Whoever you're trying to get out of your head won't disappear like that. Fuck her, whoever the lass is, and get her out of your head. These copycats won't solve your problem." Jax feels his jaw clench. He would never just fuck Melodie and walk. He wouldn't even fuck her. That damn kiss has been eating at him all night. He ignores Alex and walks towards the dance floor, his finger beckoning the woman towards him. He watches as her hips swing slowly and she moves gracefully to him.

"Lovely to see you, Jax." She smiles at him, her hand going into his as he leads her through the building back to one of the rooms. He knows this won't solve the feelings inside him, but it will dull them for now. He knows he has to stay away from Melodie, and he is sure he can. He will go on missions, come back and stay the hell out of her life unless it was needed or he was at the house to see Lucas. Even then, he won't stay in a room alone with her.

Two years later.

Jax sits at the table while Lucas talks away, but he can't hear his words, his mind on everything else, too much happening for him to concentrate.

"Are you even listening?" Lucas snaps. Jax lifts his gaze to him. "Look, I get it. Two years you have had Alisa. Move on, Jax. What's the alternative? Agree to love her and leave your wife?"

Jax nods. He knows he is right. Alisa is amazing, but he sees it in her face: her falling in love with him, which was a big no-no for him. He has Roxanne, his wife. He couldn't love another woman like that. He couldn't agree to, and hell, he couldn't let Alisa think she was loved like his wife and risk her deciding she wanted kids.

"A year, Jax. Take the year to relax, find someone new. Hell, go on holiday. You won't get this year back. Your work is here, so enjoy it. A month or two and then no work at all for the rest of the year." Jax nods. He knows Lucas is right. "Seriously, your 'It hurts; she loves me' shit is too much. Either accept it and leave Roxanne, or forget it. I leave tonight. It's my last 6 months, and then I stop it all, Jax. Any updates I will let you know. Any orders I will let you know." Lucas's hand pushes through his hair as he looks at Jax frustrated.

"I will leave with you and go home." Jax smiles up to him, finishing his coffee as Lucas shakes his head.

"No, you won't. Melodie wants to see you. She is hella pissed off that you ran out the other day when she got home."

Jax laughs. He had bolted and fucking fast. He has hardly spent any time alone with Melodie for a reason. For two years he has pretty much avoided being alone with her.

"Seriously, just stay, say hi. You're like her brother, Jax. Don't fucking hurt her and ignore her." Lucas stands up and walks out, leaving him sitting alone.

He could do it: sit here, say hello. That's all he needs to do. Sitting, he waits, the door opening not long after. He can hear the heels along the hall, his eyes catching a glimpse of her legs first as his eyes follow up her body. She stops at the door and looks at him, an amused look on her face.

"You're slow today." She looks at Jax, smiling. "Are you forgetting this is where you run like hell from this child you're so damn scared of, Jax?"

He feels his eyes rolling at her. "Not running. I just thought I would say hi then walk." He stands up. This was stupid. He can't do this.

"You're really going to just walk out of here, just like that, Jax?"

He turns and looks at her confused. "I am because I don't exactly owe you fuck all, Melodie. You have seen me, so now I can leave."

She stands glaring at him. "Do you just enjoy seeing me in pain? Is that it, Jax? You like watching me hurt over you, in pain, wondering what the hell I did to get such a cold-arsed shoulder from you?"

Jax turns to look at her, his expression as cold as ice. "You don't know what fucking pain is. You're a child." He can't do this. He takes a breath as he catches the anger and hurt in her eyes.

"You bastard." Her words scream as she swings to hit him, his hand catching hers before it hits his face and he pins her against the wall. "You don't know pain, Jax. You're the one who refuses to let anyone in. You're the one running from something because you're scared. You don't know pain. Even your wife isn't your fucking wife."

Jax moves, glaring at her. "Don't you bring Roxanne into this. God, I swear you will regret it." He stands still, grasping her wrists.

"Why? Because you're scared you will agree? Come on, Jax, even my dad said you both regret the marriage and are only staying together to please her family because her daddy would hate for his princess to get a divorce, or her being with that other guy."

Jax's jaw clenched with anger. "Melodie, my wife and marriage have nothing to do with you or anyone else."

She nods smiling. "How's Alisa? That had to have hurt, Jax, hearing her say she loves you, knowing you can't say it back even if you wanted to because, let's face it, Roxanne will cry and you feel will bad."

Jax closes his eyes. Why does she have to do this?

"She is just another in the long list of women you want to fuck to try to get me out of your head. It isn't working though, is it, Jax?" She stands staring at him, Jax shaking his head. If he kisses her, he won't stop. He has missed her.

"Enough, Melodie! My submissives have nothing to do with you. You have it all wrong." His voice is loud as she laughs.

"Yeah, because, let's be honest, as your eyes raked across my legs and up to my breasts, your jeans didn't get tighter, did they? I mean, let's be honest, Jax, that isn't your hot, hard cock pushing against my stomach right now, is it? Am I wrong? Is my dad more your thing? Is that what made you so fucking hard?"

He glances up at her. He can't do this. Letting go, he turns and walks out.

"That's it, Jax, run away. Keep running because soon, when you run to me, I will say no."

His body stops at the door. Melodie smiles, feeling like she has won. His eyes close as he shakes his head and opens the door, walking out. He needs to just stay away, far away from her. He can't give her what she wants and craves. He is married to Roxanne, and Melodie wouldn't settle for just being his submissive. Hell, she couldn't be a submissive anyway.

Driving to the familiar location, he gets out and walks in. A smile is on his face as he sees people he knows well. Grabbing his drink as always, he sits down, a woman sitting opposite him.

"Alone again, I see Mr O'Donnell?" She smiles politely at him as he nods.

"Seems that way, Deana. Still no Master?"

She looks at him, pouting slightly while shaking her head. She has been coming here for years and seems to have about as much luck with her Master's as he does with his submissives. "Maybe we are just too odd to match anyone here?" She laughs gently as Jax nods his head.

"Or, it always fails because we are going after the fakes." She looks at him, her eyes shining and showing her shock. "Oh Deana, I do it myself. I notice you doing it, turning down every Master who gives you the offer except for the ones that look so alike, so why not go after the one you want?"

Deana nods, clearly not arguing with him. "Because I would be sleeping at a grave, Mr O'Donnell. The man I crave is long gone, and can and never will come back. I keep searching for those like him in the hopes I feel something, but I never do."

Jax looks at her sympathetically. He hadn't known. "I'm sorry, Deana."

She simply smiles back at him. "No sorry needed. He was a wonderful husband and Master. So, what about you, Mr O'Donnell? Why don't you go after the real one?"

Jax laughs nervously. He should have known that would be her question. "Because I am married, and vowed that no submissive will be allowed to fall in love with me. While she would agree to be my submissive in a heartbeat, that heart would shatter pretty quickly as I can't let her love me, no matter how much she longs to. I can't leave my wife." He can't. Things are bad with Roxanne, yes, but he loves her, of course, he does. She would have walked years ago if she wasn't so terrified her father would see her as a failure.

"Not even worth trying so you get just a small piece?"

Jax feels his head shaking. "No. Hell, her dad would beat my arse with a whip anyway if I touched his little girl. She's safer staying away from me and this lifestyle."

He had hoped Melodie would settle down, marry a nice guy, and have kids. Yet all she seemed to do was go after the bad guys as if giving a warning she won't settle down any time soon. Sitting, he continues drinking, watching everyone around him. His phone beeps and he looks down at a message from Lucas. This isn't going to be good.

"I will be longer. Something got totally fucked up on the mission while I was off"

Jax feels his eyes rolling. Of course, something got fucked up. They had both taken time off together. A body dancing catches Jax's attention, a smile coming to his face.

"Another one, Mr O'Donnell?" He turns and smiles at Deana.

"Can you say if Ethan walked over now and offered you a position as his submissive, you would turn him down?"

She laughs nodding. "Hell no, I would say yes. Just consider it, Mr O'Donnell. What is the worst that can happen if you give that other woman a chance?"

Everything. He accepts he loves her, he leaves Roxanne, ruining her life and then destroys Melodie's as well as he doesn't want kids and hell, he doesn't want to be married again either. Standing, he walks to the dance floor, watching as Ethan smiles as he walks towards it. He stands still watching as Ethan meets the woman and smiles at her, his hand reaching out. Jax laughs. Well, there goes that one. He watches as they walk off through the building, his eyes following them, watching as Ethan's arm wraps around her. Seeing her top moving, his body runs cold. Not a chance! He feels his body moving suddenly towards them. Towards Melodie. Rushing, he pushes through the crowds of people walking down the small hall. Seeing the locked doors, he watches as Melodie steps inside a room with Ethan.

Jax reaches the door, banging on it. She shouldn't be here, and certainly not with Ethan. While he is kind enough in front of people, he also likes his drugs. His hands bang on the door again as it swings open. Ethan steps back as Jax walks straight over to Melodie and pulls her mask off.

"Home. Now." He stares at her as she laughs.

"No, thank you, Jax. Do you mind leaving us to it?" She moves to smile at Ethan.

"Now, Melodie, or I swear to God I will drag your arse out of here over my shoulder."

She laughs nervously. "You wouldn't dare. You would get in so much shit from the managers." She is right. She smiles, knowing she is.

"Doubtful, Melodie. I have a very close relationship with them, so just try it. Now, move!" He shouts at her, his hand going to grab her arm, Ethan beside him, pulling him back.

"Mate, she wants to be here."

Jax laughs, turning to face him. "You know who she is, right?" He looks at Jax, shaking his head. "Melodie Bozzelli."

Ethan looks at her and steps back with his hands up. "I didn't know. I swear, had I known it was your Melodie I wouldn't have even tried it."

Jax laughs, shaking his head. "She isn't my Melodie but she is Lucas's. I am just the one stuck babysitting her arse. Move." He looks at her waiting as she moves on the bed getting comfier. Jax feels his muscles tense. Damn, this woman! Jax moves, grabbing Melodie from the bed. He throws her over his shoulder as she screams, fighting against his grip. His long strides are no effort at all as he walks through the building with her screaming to be put down, everyone turning to look.

"Damn you, Jax! I am not a child!" Her hands hit his back. His hand raises as he slaps her arse.

"Keep going, and I swear you won't be able to sit down." He walks to his car. Throwing her in, her body moves to get back out.

"Do it and I swear I will tie your legs together, Melodie." She looks at him. Nodding, she sits back. Even she isn't foolish enough to fight him right now. She can see he means it. He gets in and begins driving, her eyes watching him.

"You're a bastard, Jax. Can't fuck me but won't let anyone else fuck me."

Jax laughs, turning to face her. "Could fuck you and don't want to. You were just about to hop into bed with one of the guys we are looking into. Stay the fuck away, Melodie."

She laughs. "I can handle myself, thanks. I don't need you fighting my corner." Jax shoots her a warning look as he turns back to the road. "Come on, Jax, just let me go back. I go every week. It has been years since you even asked me what I have done. You and Dad can't stop me. Let me out." He ignores her and carries on driving, her foot tapping as she feels her anger rise.

"How's lovely Roxanne, Jax? Still shagging the one she really loves."

He turns and glares at her. "Do it. I swear, Melodie. I will gag you and put you in the fucking boot and ship you as far away from here as I can get you just so I don't have to deal with your shit anymore. You're fucking stupid. The fact you go there proves it, and you only mention Roxanne because she gets what you can't fucking have." He turns back to the road. A few seconds pass in silence, and then he hears the quiet sobs and turns to look at her. Damn, he made her cry.

"Don't you go crying, Melodie, I swear." She looks at him. His eyes avoid seeing her, feeling his heartbreak.

"You hate me, don't you? You hate me so much you would rather stay faithful to someone you know loves someone more. Am I that repulsive?" Oh damn, he can't do this.

"Melodie, no, seriously, don't fucking cry, or I swear."

She looks at him, waiting. "Or you swear what, Jax? You can't go telling my dad that a guy made me cry, can you? What are you going to do? Beat yourself up this time?"

He stops outside her house and watches as she gets out. Moving, he follows her, hearing the front door slam behind them. Walking in, he goes straight to her.

"You know full well you're not repulsive, Melodie. Don't go throwing that shit around. Look at me now." Her head stays down as she shakes it. His hand reaches out and pushes her chin up to look at her, his heart breaking. "Why the hell are you doing this, Melodie? You need to forget about me."

She laughs, looking at him. "I have. I gave up on you a long time ago, Jax, but you can't just leave it, can you? No, you have to step in and stop me from being happy. I don't want you. Why would I want someone so scared of love that he stays with someone who hates him?" She turns to walk away, his hand grabbing her arm and stopping her.

"Stop, stop bringing my fucking marriage into this, Melodie. Look around you. I have stayed out of your life for years, and you're still alone. Maybe you're the issue." She stands staring at him, shocked. Damn it! He shakes his head, his arms going to wrap around her. "Sorry, Melodie. Just please stop with my marriage."

Her hands fight against his as she tries pushing him back. "I'm the problem. I get it, Jax. Go back to fucking those who look like me because, let's be honest, we both know the real reason you don't want me and think I am the issue in relationships." He stands looking at her confused. She loves him, or would if he gave her a chance, and he can't risk that. "Don't play dumb. Let me guess, you saw the scar and that is how you knew it was me? See, Ethan didn't seem to mind the scar, Jax. Clearly, you and everyone else do."

Jax stares at her, shocked, his head shaking as more tears fall from her eyes. It is hideous, awful. She usually hides it well. Tonight she took a risk wearing a shorter top, and Jax's words just proved to her it is repulsive.

"Look at me, Melodie. Your scar is nothing. If anyone sees an issue with it, they don't deserve you. You deserve someone who will drown in all the beauty you have but also the scars and marks, and still come out unable to breathe because all they see is beauty."

She nods looking at him. "And you see something that repulses you, I get it. Go back there, Jax, go get the perfect ones without any marks." She tries pushing him away, which only makes him step closer. He can't go, not while she crying, he can't.

"Melodie, don't." His finger strokes along her back where the scar is. "It is fucking perfect. You are perfect. Please stop crying and thinking you're repulsive. You're not. Hell, Melodie, I saw all the guys watching you tonight, all of them, that is how amazing you look." They all did, and Ethan was quick to get up there and offer her a place.

"Don't. You being nice to me and lying will just make this worse. Just go, Jax. I don't want or need you anymore."

He is going to regret this.