TROUBLES OF LOVE

The winds were howling; the temperature was stuck at the freezing mark. I wore only a sleeveless cotton blouse and a pair of leggings that stood little chance against the chill. But I do not appear to feel uncomfortable because i had just caught my partner cheating, I mean my ex. I wanted to surprise John, so I got him rice and chicken from chicken republic. When I got to his house, I knocked but there was no answer. But thank Goodness I knew the code to his lock so I was able to open the door. As I entered, I heard loud moans coming from his bedroom.

I could hear the bed screeching and my heart raced fast as I ran to the bedroom hoping what I was suspecting was not true. On John's bed, I could see him thrusting his penis into another woman's vagina while they both let out loud moans. They were both immersed in the moment that they didn't even notice my presence. Not until I yelled his name. He jumped up and quickly picked up his boxers and wore it. I couldn't bear the site of what I was seeing so I walked out of the room. He followed me calling my name and saying "I can explain." "Explain what John? Explain what?" I yelled as I burst out crying. "I'm sorry, I don't know what got into me." He said as he scratched his head with his finger tips. "You are only sorry you got caught. Please delete my number. This will be the last time you would hear for me. Men ain't shit." I said in between sobs and stomped out of his house. I sat down on a bench in front of his house, I couldn't walk because I was still in shock. It was freezing but I couldn't feel. My phone started ringing, John was the caller. So I removed the SIM card out of anger and broke it. I started reminiscing about how men have treated me so far. Maybe love ain't just for me. At least John tried to apologize, the last relationship I was in before this one he didn't even flinch when I caught him. Instead, he told me to get out. He didn't even call me afterwards. He dumped me without any explanation. I was broken for months. I kind of blame myself because I had seen red flags, but I ignored. I knew he was cheating but I thought I was the main girl. Not knowing I was only one of his side pieces. I blame my self for tolerating shit. I walked down the street questioning my self esteem. "Am I not good enough? Am I ugly? Don't I have a great body? Am I unintelligent? Wait am I dumb? Why do they keep treating me like dirt?" I questioned myself as I sighted a bar and I decided to enter and go get wasted. Because my thought process was fucked up at that moment. I sat on one of the stools in the bar and asked the bartender to give me one shot of vodka. After taking it I asked for more and more until I was drunk. I thought being drunk was going to help with the pain. But I could still feel the burn in my heart and I started crying. "Are you okay miss?" A stranger that was seated next to me asked. I looked at him with disgust in my eyes and said drunkenly "what do you want? Do you want me to fall in love with you? So you could break my heart? Oh maybe that's why you're acting like you care. You guys are all the same. I hate men." The man had a confused look on his face before the bartender said "I think she just got her heart broken." He ignored what the bartender said and moved closer to give me a hug. As I sunk into his arms I broke down in tears again and said " I loved him, i loved." The man said with a calm voice "it's okay" as he pats my back.

I woke up the next morning with a banging headache. I couldn't even remember how I got home or what happened the night before. I was startled when I heard a strange deep voice say "You're up already, hope you feel better " I turned around to see a man who looked like someone who had picked up heavy objects and put them down and then done that again a few billion times. He was hot! I stared at him for few seconds before I yelled "who are you? and what are you doing here. How did you even get into my house? I'm calling the police." As I tried to reach out for my phone. " whoa... calm down.

You passed out last night in my arms. I checked your ID card and luckily, I found your house address on it. So I brought you home." He said. "So how did you open my house? and why didn't you leave after dropping me in my house?" I asked the hot looking stranger. "I checked your bag and found your keys, when I laid you down on the bed you started vomiting and choking. So I had to stay back and made sure you were okay" he said with a calm look. He didn't even look annoyed. I covered my face in shame as memories of what happened last all came back to me. "I'm so embarrassed, I'm sorry for putting you through all that. Thank you so much for bringing me home and making sure I was safe." I said while biting my fingernails. "It's okay, I made you breakfast. So I'll just drop it and leave." He said while walking toward me. "Why don't you just eat before leaving?" I asked nervously. "No" he said as he reached for the notebook and pen on the bedside table and wrote down his number and name. "Call me if you need to talk to someone, I'll be here for you" he said with a sweet voice and dropped the book back on the bedside table. I picked the book up and read what he wrote "your name is Owen?" I asked. "Yes" he said as walked out of the room. "Owen" I called just before he exited the room. "Yes?" He answered and turned to look at me. "Sorry I yelled at you. And thank you for breakfast." I said and I forced my self to smile a little. "you're welcome" he said and smiled back before leaving. Days passed, weeks passed and even months but what John did was still fresh in my heart. I went on dates with a couple of guys but they all left me because I didn't open my heart to them. My heart turned numb. What I went through in my past relationships changed my perception of love. "I can't continue this with you. I'm sorry, I can't be with someone who doesn't trust me. I feel like I'm dating myself." The person I was dating at the moment said to me. I looked at him and said "Okay" "Okay? Is that all you are going to say?" He said "Well, at least I didn't cheat. You were the one that decided to leave. I respect your decision young lad. Good luck in your future endeavors." I said with a sarcastic tone and laid on my bed. The last thing I heard him say was "you are a lost cause" and he stomped out of the room and I heard the door bang. Later that evening, I was so bored and I didn't have anything to do. So I decided to clean the house. I did dishes, laundry, swept, mopped and arranged the house. While I was arranging my room I saw the book where Owen wrote down his number. I stared at the book for few minutes contemplating whether to call him or not.

I concluded that I was going to call him. I typed the number on my phone and dialed. When he picked up, I became speechless because I was nervous. "Hello, please who is this?" I heard a voice say over the phone. "Ermm ermmm... it's me." I said. I didn't bother to call my name because he didn't even know my name. "Please is this a prank call? Because I am very busy here. I don't have time for a prank call." Owen said. "No, it's not. It's just that I don't know how to explain this.

We me..." he interrupted me while I was talking and said "what's your name please?" "It's the drunk lady you took home few months back. Remember? You wrote your number on a book and asked me to call you if I ever wanted to talk." I said while I was rubbing my feet against each other. "Oh, I remember." He said. "I just wanted to..." he interrupted me again and said "uhm please I'm really busy right now. I'll call you when I'm less busy. I promise." I said "ok" and he hung up. "Oh my God he really hung up on me." I said to myself and a lot of thoughts started racing through my mind. "What does he even think? Wait does he think I'm interested in him? Haa... he must be delusional. Why did he even drop his number. I didn't even ask for it." I got so mad and slept. I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing. I picked it up after it had rang a couple of times. "Hello, who is this?" I said with a sleepy voice. "You didn't save my number, it's Owen." It took me few seconds to process what he said because I was still sleepy. I jumped up after processing what he said. "Did I wake you up? I could just call you back." He said. "No, it's okay. I'm awake already." I said while rubbing the back of my hand against my eye. "Sorry, I was very busy when you called. I had things to take care of." He said. "You must be a very busy man." I said. "No, that's not it" he laughed and continued "how are you? Took you a very long time to call. I have been expecting your call. Thank Goodness you finally called." "I didn't have anything to say that's why I didn't call earlier than this." I said. "It's okay. What's up how have you been?" He said. "Surviving . How've you been?" I said "I've been good. Are you okay? Do you want to talk?" He said. "Yeah, I'm okay." I said. "I would like us to meet up soon." Owen said. "Sure, when do you want to meet up?" I asked. "If it's by me I would like to see you right now." He said. I laughed and said "you know that is not possible." "I know, I said that to emphasize on how soon I want to see you. Would you mind if I treat you to dinner tomorrow?" He said. "I wouldn't reject free food." I said. "I'll pick you up by 7pm tomorrow." He said. I smiled and said "Okay." "See you tomorrow." He said and hung up. And that was it. He ended the call without even asking for my name.