Chapter One
Cadenza Rowan sat at the edge of her bed, playing with her fingers as she was in deep thought. She had news to tell her parents, and she was sure they wouldn't like her news one bit. Even though it might upset them, she still felt it was better they heard it directly from her rather than find out in a shameful way that would break their hearts.
She picked her night-black hair into a ponytail and wiped the tears that had fallen onto her cheeks, she should stop pitying herself, and she sucked in a deep breath as she muttered words of encouragement to herself.
It would probably be best if she said it over dinner. Everyone would be present, and the only time the family is complete is during meals. The Rowan family's tradition is that no matter what, you are not allowed to skip meal gatherings, and it's the only time they have to each other as a whole family.
"Cadenza!" A small gasp escaped her slightly parted lips when she heard her mother's voice from the other end of the room, she was probably calling her because dinner was ready. Cadenza jumped out of her bed and wiped her face with the back of her hands, using her pinky finger to wipe away the tears at her lower eyelids, she didn't want her mother to figure out anything before she told them. "Don't just stay locked up in your room, it's dinner time."
"I'm coming!" She yelled back as she ran into the bathroom to wash her face, she was thankful her mother didn't choose to come in, she would have figured out something was wrong in a minute and would probably force her to tell her what it was. She dried her face with the towel hanging against the shower, she felt her heart skip another beat when she realized that her father would also be present at the dining table.
Her father, Rhett Rowan, head of the Rowan family is a no-nonsense person, he is a very religious man who aspires to have a position in the church and is very strict with his daughters just because of something like this.
Yet, she allowed it to happen. He would never forgive her for this. She could already foretell how tonight would go. Even though she was shaking and contemplating whether to tell them or not, she had already determined to do it tonight.
"Put your phone away, Cabrini." Rhett barked at his second daughter, Cabrini frowned but didn't argue, she knew better than to argue with her father, she set the phone at the sides of her rice bowl and picked up her spoon.
"Don't be too hard on the girl, Rhett." Grannie Nell chuckled when she noticed just how much Cabrini was scared of her father, she set down the bowl of eggs on the table close to her son. "She is just the right age to know how the internet works."
"She is always typing on that phone, and I keep telling them, the internet is a device created by the devil to cause distractions," Rhett said again, that ever since he joined his church two years ago, he had been such a fanatic, he even discarded his phone so he could have the opportunity to hold a position with them.
"Oh, honey, Cabrini is in high school now. She needs the internet for a lot of things," Chloe said as she joined them at the dining table. Rhett raised a curious brow at her as if he was expecting something or someone.
"Where is Cadenza, don't tell me she is sick again?" He asked curiously his eyes narrowing, and just as Chloe was about to say something in her daughter's defense, Cadenza walked down the stairs in her night dress, with a glum expression on her face.
"Dinner is always so noisy." Ryan chirped in jokingly, Ryan was the firstborn and the only son of the family, he recently graduated from college at the young age of twenty-four and because of his outstanding skills he secured a job in one of the highest-paying technology companies in the country, he was truly a son to be proud of.
"You should see breakfast," Cora answered in a small whisper as well. "Everywhere is a chaos."
Cora is the youngest and the last daughter of the family, she is just six years old, but she is also very smart and is her father's favorite child. Since everyone was already at the table, Chloe dished out the meal and everyone dug into their dinner, everyone else except for Cadenza and her father noticed it first.
"Why aren't you eating, Cadenza?" He asked curiously and her eyes left the vegetables on her plates and they rested on his steel-cold eyes, she felt her heart flip painfully in her chest, but she tried to remain as composed as possible.
"You look like you just saw a ghost." Cora noticed with a mocking grin, which earned her a glare from Cabrini, her elder sister.
"You should have some respect for your sister, little girl."
Interrupting whatever Ryan had in defense of Cora, Cadenza dropped her cutlery and then raised her eyes to meet her father's hard ones once again.
"I have something to confess to you." She announced as boldly as she could get, she blinked back her tears as well.
"Don't tell me you have to repeat another semester," Her dad's tone alone scared her, she hadn't even told him her news and he was already sounding so aggressive. "I spent a lot of money to make sure you transferred out of the previous school, you can't disappoint me again."
"Let the girl talk, honey." His wife, Chloe cautioned him as she held his hands from across the table, Cadenza wondered if it was a good idea to tell them her news, her father would kill her. It was too late to back away now because everyone's gaze was now on her. They were waiting, waiting and they were still waiting, the silence enough to drive her crazy.
"I am sorry, father, mother." She started again, her voice nearing tears, as she turned in the direction of her siblings as well. "I'm truly sorry."
"Will you tell me what in God's name you are sorry for?" Rhett felt his patience wearing off, he was already annoyed at the fact that another bad news was waiting for him, he hated the fact that his first daughter had done nothing so far but brought him problems. "If you are going to talk then do it."
"Dad." This time it was Ryan calling him to caution, everyone knew just how bad Rhett's temper was and so they tried to avoid it, Ryan knew just how much his little sister feared their father, so he understood if she was hesitating to tell them the problem.
He gave her a reassuring nod, somehow boosting her confidence that no matter what happened, Ryan would be here to defend her.
"Go on, what do you want to tell us?" Grandma Nell urged with a wrinkly smile on her face.
"I..." She was unable to say it, the words felt heavy on her tongue, she knew it would be difficult but she didn't expect this much, nevertheless, she had come this far and she couldn't go back.
"I-I'm pregnant."
That was the bomb, everywhere became dead silent, she was expecting an instantaneous reaction, but nothing happened. The dining hall became so silent it seemed as though they weren't even breathing, everyone's eyes were now on Rhett and he chuckled.
"Cadenza, what are you talking about?" He asked with a light smile playing on his lips. "What do you mean by you're pregnant?"
"I'm sorry Dad, I didn't mean t-" he banged his fists on the table making everyone else jump out of their seats, Cadenza jumped out as well.
"What the hell are you talking about, Cadenza?" He barked making her jolt in surprise. "Answer me, you brat, are you pregnant?"
"Y-Yes, I'm pregnant," and before she could proceed to the next part, she felt a loud smack against her right cheek, she knocked over the chair and fell to the ground.
"You ungrateful kid," he ranted angrily. "I worked so hard to make you go to school so you could be a better person like your brother, is this how you repay me?"
"Rhett, can you please calm down?" Grandma Nell snapped at him, she was horrified at the scene her son was causing, she tried to soothe him by touching his shoulder but he pushed her away stepping towards Cadenza.
"Don't tell me to calm down, mother." He yelled. "This is me disciplining my child, please don't get involved."
His bloodshot eyes turned back towards his daughter who was still scrambling to get off from the floor. "Tell me, who is the father of the shame you are carrying?"
Chapter Two
"Tell me, who is the father of the shame you are carrying?" He roared and Cadenza sniffled back the tears that were stirring in her eyes, meanwhile, everyone was waiting for her to answer her father's question. She could take anything but the look of anger and frustration in her father's eyes.
She was truly his shame and disappointment, and impatiently Rhett pulled on the table cloth, allowing all the plates and the dishes to fall to the floor, everyone flinched and Cora started crying.
"Answer me, Cadenza!" He yelled again making her jolt in surprise, Cabrini walked Cora out of the scene. "Cadenza who got you pregnant?"
"I...I..." She paused her eyes flitted towards Ryan, it was as though she was asking for help. "I don't know."
Rhett slapped her again, and Ryan pulled her away from their father's reach, Rhett's bloodshot eyes widened in surprise.
"Ryan..." He warned.
"That's enough father," Ryan said pushing Cadenza behind him, standing toe to toe with his father. "I can't allow this to continue."
"Ryan stay away from her," He warned him even clearer and Ryan shook his head vehemently.
"No, I can't let you keep hurting my sister." He then turned towards Cadenza, his blue eyes softening at the red blotch on her face. "Go to your room and don't come out no matter what you hear."
"Ryan, who do you think you are to give such orders?" Rhett asked kicking one of the chairs away from his path and heading towards them. "I am her father, and this is my right, who the hell do you think you are to stop me from finding out how my useless teenage daughter got pregnant?!"
"Father, you are not listening to any of us." Ryan started still shielding his sister with his body, he tried to be as calm as possible, even though he was also surprised, but no one knew Cadenza like he did; he was so sure she wasn't that kind of person. "I know you're angry, that's the more reason why we should talk about this more rationally."
"And talk I am doing!" Rhett snapped again, he was boiling, his nostrils flared from the anger that consumed him, if he could have his way he wanted to kill Cadenza. "I asked you, who the father of your child is Cadenza?"
"I-I don't know who he is, Father, I swear I don't." She burst into an ugly sob that irritated Rhett greatly.
"Cadenza I told you to go to your room and don't come outside until I say so," Ryan ordered once more and reluctantly, Cadenza turned and ran in the direction of her room.
"This is your fault, Chloe!" Rhett's voice boomed across the room, Cadenza could hear their argument from behind her closed door.
She paced around her room for a while, as she blamed herself for causing her family to fight, it was because of her stupidity that's why her parents were having this clash.
They had been happily married for twenty-four years now, and this was the first time they were having such a fight.
"My fault? How is this my fault, Rhett?" Chloe asked her voice lightly raised. "I raised all our children, and with the help of God they turned out fine."
"And how come Cadenza, your very first daughter, was the one who didn't turn out fine?" Rhett snapped back.
"I don't know,"
"Mom, Dad, stop arguing this isn't the solution." Ryan snapped, he was also tired of his parents' endless bickering, and he was regretting his decision to come home instead of spend the weekend with his girlfriend, but he was also thankful he was present else his father would have done the unspeakable right now. "We need to find the father of Cadenza's child. Either what she did was right or wrong, what is done is done, and blaming anybody will not change it."
Leaning into the wooden door, Cadenza's heart thumped against her ribcage as she listened to their conversation, she bit down on her lips in frustration as she prayed for it to be a dream.
"Let's just have a conversation when we are all calm," Grandma suggested and only then did everyone leave, and that was how dinner was ruined.
The sounds of the light knocks on the door woke Cadenza from her uncomfortable slumber, she wiped the snot away from the corner of her mouth and got up to the door.
She paused for a while and waited patiently until the knock came back again, she opened the door hoping it would be anyone but her father. She saw Grandma Nell standing in the doorway, her grey hair combed finely and resting on one side of her shoulders.
"Cadenza," She said with a small smile on her face, just taking a glance at her granddaughter, she could tell that Cadenza had cried for hours. Her eyes were red and puffy instead of the normal espresso color, it was such a pity. "May I come in?"
"Yes, sure..." Cadenza opened the door wider to let her in, she walked to the bed and sat down quietly. Awkwardness hung briefly in the air, Cadenza was unable to leave the door, she was not so sure if her grandmother was also here to blame her.
"Why don't you come and sit with me for a while." Grandma Nell offered her voice as soft and convincing as ever.
Cadenza felt her legs move on their own accord as her body was compelled to follow her grandmother's request without second thoughts; she sat down a few centimeters away from her.
"I'm not going to blame you or anything, my child." She started in a cool soothing voice, she held Cadenza's hands in hers and rubbed it slightly. "Just like Ryan said, what's done is done, but this news of yours has done a lot of things to your parents."
Cadenza lowered her head.
"I know..." She answered breathlessly. "...And I'm sorry."
"Having a baby is nothing to be ashamed about, in fact, it's a blessing, it means you are ready to start your own family." Grandma Nell patted the lad on her finely combed hair. "That's why you have to tell us who is the boy that got you pregnant."
Silence fell upon them and Cadenza was back to sobbing again, she gripped the hem of her dress and lowered her head.
"Is it your boyfriend?" Grandma Nell pestered and only then did Cadenza shake her head.
"I don't have a boyfriend, grannie."
"Then is it a guy you like?" She shook her head again. "Then is it your teacher, or is it an older man? I promise not to judge you, the father of the child is important to you as well as it is to the child."
"Grandma I really don't know who the father of the baby is." She whispered in between her sobs. "I-I don't even know how it happened."
Grandma Nell's expression darkens immediately as realization dawns on her.
"What do you mean?" Her grip tightened on her granddaughter. "Don't tell me, were you raped?"
There was a brief silence hanging between them before Cadenza nodded hesitantly.
"Gracious God..." Grandma Nell sighed shaking her head. "That can't be possible, how did it happen and why didn't you tell anyone?"
Cadenza recalling the bitter memory burst into tears once again.
"I-I was scared, I didn't know what to do." She cried in a small whisper. "I didn't know that I was going to get pregnant."
"How did it happen?" Grandma insisted. "Tell me, baby. When did it happen?"
"It was at Sarah's party." Cadenza coughed wiping away the small tears that leaked against her cheeks.
"The one I forced you to go?" Cadenza nodded hurriedly before she continued.
"Sarah went out to the garage to get more drinks and I had a drink, it was just one drink, Grandma and it wasn't alcohol, it was soda, I swear." More tears streamed out of her eyes as she explained, but she didn't need to swear Grandma trusted Cadenza enough to know she wouldn't lie. "As soon as I drank it, I got so dizzy and that's when it happened."
The silence in the room made Cadenza continue freely, "When I woke up in the morning I was in the guest room, and I was naked."
"Did you see the guy who hurt you?" Grannie jumped to the next before Cadenza could answer. "Is it someone you recognize?"
Cadenza sniffed back before she innocently shook her head.
"No..." she whispered wiping her face with her palm, "My sight was hazy there was no way I could see him."
Grandma Nell suddenly pulled her granddaughter into a hug and it was only then, that Cadenza found the courage to sob for herself, she hadn't cried since the incident, she was scared but she didn't know if it was okay to let her emotions show.
Grandma Nell's hug was both warm and comfortable, and it gave her a sense of security.
Chapter Three
"Whatever that is, I can't let her stay here!" Rhett ranted, he was fuming.
"And why not?" Chloe interjected immediately, she seemed ready to jump at her husband. "We are her parents, we should protect her."
"And what about my reputation?" he demanded, his voice rising, this time his glare facing his wife. "What about my name?"
"I'm a priest at the cathedral. I'll be relieved of my post, my position in the community, and the church! I will be the laughingstock of the church, you know I am stricter than anyone else," he added bitterly. "All because one of my daughters got pregnant. Am I supposed to be responsible for that? You know how much I have tried to keep my records clean."
"So abandoning our daughter is your solution to that? Will pretending it never happen make you closer to God? Will it make you more righteous?" There was a slight pause in the room. "You're despicable, Rhett," Chloe growled through clenched teeth.
"How dare you talk to me like that?" Rhett boomed angrily. "I am your husband, and the head of this family, do you think this is easy for me?"
They were about to continue when Grandma Nell intervened. There was a small frown on her face.
"That isn't a solution for either of you! Fighting to know who is wrong or who is right will never help, what else, you want to get a divorce?" she sank into the cushion. "I might just die already."
Cadenza had been listening to the terrible fight all day. Suddenly, everything went quiet, and they began mumbling in low voices.
"Cadenza!" She jolted up from her bed when she heard her father's voice, her heart racing in her chest. She wasn't ready for this yet. Anyway, she hurried downstairs, where the whole family was already seated, waiting for his judgment.
"You may take your seat," he ordered, and she quickly sat beside her mother. She played nervously with her fingers as he continued.
"I've listened to everyone's opinion, and I've had a change of heart." She sighed, hoping that one day he wouldn't be so disappointed in her. "What I really wanted to do was disown you and throw you out of my house, but your mother was against it and your grandmother too." He stared at her with a straight face, but she avoided his gaze.
He cleared his throat before continuing, "Nevertheless, I can't afford to have you and your baby stay here in the house," he exhaled sharply. "It would ruin my reputation and bring shame to my name, and you know how much I have tried to maintain my name. I am sure you don't want me to suffer because of your mistakes."
The silence grew thick, and it felt like everyone had stopped breathing.
"So, I have decided that you will go live with your aunt Erin and start a new life over there," he added with a shrug. "It's better than being on the streets."
"I will not let you abandon my daughter!" Chloe immediately interjected. "This is the time she needs the support of her parents, we have to be there for her now more than ever."
Grandma Nell chimed in as support, "She needs her mother; she has to stay with us."
"Father, Cadenza could be in more danger if she isn't with us," Ryan added. "She might not get used to the area around her."
"Cadenza, this is the best I can do for you," he said firmly, as the argument flared up again, Cadenza cleared her throat, attracting their attention.
"I'll go to Aunt Erin's. I'll be okay, I promise," she said, a faint smile on her lips.
"At least you have some sense," Rhett muttered, getting up and leaving the room.
"Hey, Caddie," Ryan said as he walked into her room. He sat on her bed and playfully ruffled her hair.
"I'll miss you, brother," she said as he pulled her into a hug. The door opened, and her sisters walked in.
Cadenza pulled away from Ryan and dried her tears.
"When are you going to come back home?" Cora asked, her dark eyes brimming with tears.
"Oh, baby, come here." She lifted the little girl onto her lap. "I'll be back soon, okay?"
"But who's going to take me to school?" Cora asked innocently. "Who will help me with my homework and give me chocolate when I pass my test?" Her dark eyes sparkled as Cadenza smiled, wiping Cora's tear-streaked cheeks.
"Cabrini's here, and your big brother Ryan."
"It's unfair that this is happening to you," Cabrini complained, her frown deepening. "I hate Daddy so much!"
"Shh! Don't say that, Cabrini!" Cadenza sighed. "No matter what happens, he's still our father."
"I agree with Cabrini," Ryan said calmly. "I hate him too. This could've happened to anyone, and he should be a real father..." He paused, then added flippantly, "... He's just running away from his responsibilities. Leave him to me, though."
"No, give it up, Ryan. I decide to leave, this isn't dad's fault, he is right, this is my fault. If I had just stayed at home that day none of this would ever have happened." She lowered her eyes to the bow on Cora's dress and began tugging at it playfully.
"What's wrong with you!? Why are you not blaming the animal that did this to you, why are you blaming yourself?" Cabrini snapped sharply. "We all know how Aunt Erin treats us. Do you want to suffer?"
"Cabrini, this is hard for her too," Ryan interjected, trying to stop them from arguing.
"It's harder for me!" Cabrini retorted. When she noticed Cadenza was crying silently, she knelt and held her hands. "Please don't go. Stay with us..."
"I've made up my mind, and I'm not changing it," she said flatly. "I won't listen to another word from you. Get out of my room now!"
Cabrini stood up swiftly and walked across the room. She turned to give her sister one last look. "It's not too late, Cadenza. Don't be stupid!" With that, she disappeared through the door.
Ryan rubbed Cadenza's back soothingly. "I'm doing it for Dad," she said quietly.
Cadenza had already packed her bags and was ready to leave. She sat on her bed, waiting for her uncle's arrival. As she sat there, she reminisced about her past, her childhood... She would miss her room, her own private haven. She would miss her bed, her covers-everything.
The creaking of the door startled her. Her head snapped toward it reflexively, and she saw her mother enter.
"Mother," she stood up and hugged her. "I knew you'd come to say goodbye."
"Forgive me, my baby. There was nothing I could do." Chloe kissed her hair gently.
"Let's sit down and talk." She smiled softly. "I was the only daughter of my mother, and during my marriage, she gave me this." Chloe took out a bracelet with a large green stone at the center, possibly an emerald worth hundreds of thousands. "She told me to sell it if I ever had financial problems, but since it was her last gift to me, I couldn't. I vowed to pass it down to my daughter."
She sighed. "But I was too lucky-I had three daughters."
Cadenza listened intently, knowing this might be the last time she received something so precious.
"I didn't know who to give it to, but now, it's only right that you keep it."
"If you ever face hardship, sell it. Use it to take care of your child." She smiled sweetly.
Cadenza took the bracelet from her. "Thank you so much, Mommy."
"Now, my dear, no matter what happens, don't even think about giving up." Chloe paused. "Life is like music-it may have its sad notes, but in the end, it's all part of a beautiful melody, just like your name."