Sweet Temptations: My lover, My Ex's Father

~Clarissa's POV~

Ugh. How much did I drink last night?.

The question came out groggy, through my croaked voice, asking no one in particular. As my hand instinctively grabbed at my forehead that throbbed with pain from a hangover......the after effect of my drunken state.

My eyes slowly peeled open, as I took in my surrounding despite the haze that fogged my vision. A soft glow of sunlight pierced through a gap in the heavy curtains, irradiating the room before me.

My eyes snapped wide awake, as reality dawned on me that this wasn't my room but an unfamiliar place, as panic and fear now gnawed at my heaving chest.

Where was this? and How did I even get here?. I pondered.

The last thing I remember was having the time of my life at my bachelorette party last night. A rite of passage closing the chapters on my last moments as a single woman.

The club, the laughters, the hearty cheers, the clinking of wine glasses, but everything else after that is a blur........a terrifying void.

Wait. I also vaguely remember taking some shots of tequila, before I felt an unusual sense of dizziness, my mind slipping in and out, like a wave of sleepiness had washed over me, pulling me down with it.

"No! It can't be". I gasped.

Was I drugged last night?.

The horrid thought sent a cold chill that rippled through me, as I shot up from the bed beneath me.

In a state of panic, with tremored hands I clutched the edge of the duvet and yanked it off, as my bulged eyes darted down to my body.

Thankfully my clothes were still on, despite how twisted and disheveled they looked, but it does nothing to soothe my wrecked nerves as I used my hands to thoroughly examine my stomach, my cleavages, all the way down to my thighs to ensure there wasn't any sign of force inflicted on me.

"Oh, thank God". I heaved out a sigh of relief, finding nothing unusual after confirming my fears.

Taking another glance across the room, judging by the furniture pieces, the faint smell of cigarettes from the ash tray filled with cigarette butts, it didn't look like someone's home but more like a cheap motel.

A motel! Gosh, I can only imagine what my fiance would say if he saw me like this, despite being alone in a room I still had no idea how I got to.

He would definitely loose his head over this.

Speaking of my fiance. I desperately looked around in search of my phone, when I saw it laid faced down on the bed stand and I grabbed at it swiftly.

Shit! I cussed out.

Just after seeing the countless calls, and a message from my best friend......Diane.

"Where the hell are you Rissa? Did you forget your getting married today?".

The wedding!

Ofcourse. How could I forget I was getting married today, as I quickly stumbled out of the bed, steadying my wobbled legs on the floor. I straightened out my crumpled clothes, picked up my remaining items and dashed out the door, closing it behind me as I head out into the bustling street to flag down a taxi.

All I could do was pray I didn't do anything stupid last night I was bound to regret.

******************

Standing in front of the full length mirror, my breathe hitched as I looked at my reflection. The dress I had taken my time to pick out months ago looked breathtaking as I grinned in admiration of how it hugged my body, accentuating my curves perfectly.

My hair was styled elegantly, framing my face, as the veil rested gently over my head. And for a moment I felt like royalty.

Today was finally my wedding day.

A day I had looked forward to and dreamt of, ever since I was a little girl who grew up watching Disney princesses get married to princes. And in a couple of hours I too would be saying "I Do!" to my own prince charming.........Eric Gonzales, my fiance, the love of my life and soon to be husband.

Eric and I met in college. He was what most people called a "social butterfly".

Hot. Drop dead gorgeous. Rich and a ladies magnet. Seeing how ladies always fought for his attention.

While I on the other hand, was the opposite attraction. A nerd, a geek, and super introverted.

So imagine the shock factor when people heard we were going out. I too couldn't believe it at first, because how did a girl like me, land a billionaire prince like him. Brooklyn's most eligible bachelor.

Crazy right?

Most people assumed we wouldn't last up to a month. Two weeks tops they said, but we beat all the odds and would soon exchange our vows in front of our friends, family and possibly the whole world at the alter.

Just thinking about it made me feel excited and nervous at the same time, as my fingers fiddled with the helm of my dress.

"You look stunning Rissa". Diane's voice interrupted, pulling me from my thoughts, as she stood in the doorway of my bridal suite, her eyes gleaming with joy.

Diane was my best friend since childhood and college sorority sister. We had been through every phase of life together, the high and low moments.

Heck, we even shared the same dream of getting hitched at 22 and here I was being the first to fulfill our aged long dream, with Diane as my maid of honor. I couldn't have envisioned it any other way.

"Eric's jaw is going to drop, just seeing you walk down that aisle". she proudly enounced, now stepping into the room, inspecting the dress, giving me one final once-over as she adjusted some loose ends to perfection.

"Thanks Dee". I replied showing my appreciation, as I flashed back a smile through the mirror, while she stood behind my frame.

"But don't think your off the hook just yet. What really happened last night?".

"I should be the one asking you that. After I excused myself to use the loo last night, by the time I was done and returned back to the table, you were gone. Hence why I kept blowing up your phone the whole night because I was worried something bad happened to you". Diane admitted, with worry evident in her voice, as well as her countenance.

"Where did you go last night?". she inquired, but I couldn't bring myself to tell her about the events of this morning. Waking up in a strange place and my suspicions of being drugged by one of my bridal party guests.

Diane was my homegirl, but some secrets were better left unsaid. And so I brushed it off by assuring her I was alright.

"I'm fine Diane, I just felt too tired and decided to go home. That's all". flashing back a half hearted smile.

Her eyes searched my face, checking if I was telling the truth and truly okay like I claimed.

"Are you sure Rissa?".

"Yes Diane, don't worry. Can we please go now?". I reassured her again, just before we set out to the church for the ceremony.

*******************

As we safely arrived at the church premises, the wedding arrangements were already in full swing. Guests trooped in, and in no time the church was filled to an enormous capacity.

Exotic flowers were arranged into beautiful patterns and the pianist played the classical wedding march soft music in the background. Members of the press, media houses and paparazzi were already on standby, camera ready to document what the world considered a New York love story. The atmosphere was thick with excitement and anticipation.

My father........a tall, handsome figure, walked beside me with a proud smug on his face, as he firmly held onto my arm, while guiding me down the aisle, approaching the alter.

With each step, my heart hammered against my rib cage, as a nervous sensation surged through me. And it wasn't because of the empty seats, where my mother and sister were supposed to be seated at..... probably running late or the vacant seat of Eric's father who I would be meeting for the first time at the after party, since he was out of the country on a business trip.

But because Eric........my fiance, was nowhere in site, where he should have been standing at the alter awaiting my arrival. As an unsettling feeling gnawed at my chest and twisted knots formed inside my stomach.

When I pictured what today would look like, it never involved me standing here, alone at the alter, humiliated, as the prying eyes of guests etched at me like daggers and hushed whispers rose amongst them, with the collective gasps of disbelief. And worse, the whole world was watching this LIVE on every local news channel.

Minutes passed by, as the tension in the air grew rapidly. My eyes flickered momentarily at my father, whose face was visibly masked with concern and worry.

"Are you certain your groom is still coming?". the priest asked, pulling me out of the storm that brewed inside me.

My gaze darted to the wall clock, and Eric was now unjustifiably late.

"Yes, he will. He will definitely be here". I responded, with a forced smile stretched across my lips, masking my embarrassment, and holding on to the remaining glimmer of hope I had.

Maybe he was running late due to traffic or because he probably slept in.

Those were the lies I fed myself, as a possible explanation to why he was M.I.A on the most important day of our lives.

I glanced back at Diane, whose face conveyed a mix of emotions, but it was something in her eyes that made me realize there and then, I was holding on to nothing but air........an empty void.

How could Eric do this to me? and on our wedding day?. I desperately pondered. But I wasn't going to stand here and do nothing. I needed answers and I was going to get them.

So I held up my gown, came down from the alter and frantically dashed towards the doors, as I made my way through the flashed camera lights blinding me, and the relentless questions of reporters who swarmed around me like vultures, with Diane chasing right behind me.

"Wait, Clarissa where are you going? Stop!". her voice thundered the question, but I don't stop.

Getting to the main road, I flagged down a taxi to take me to Eric's lakeside house, we planned to move into after the wedding, as I hoped to find him there.

"I need to do this Diane, I need answers". I screamed back, but the rest of her words were drowned out by the roared sounds of the engine and my burning rage.

********************

As soon as I arrived at the house, I pushed my way through the towering doors, letting myself in.

"Eric! Where are you?". I shout out. But a deafening silence loomed over.

Too quiet. Too still.

Suddenly I hear faint, moan sounds coming from the bedroom upstairs, as my breathe caught in my throat. I made my way up the stairs, through buckled knees and choked sobs, uncertain of what I was about to walk into.

As I got close enough, through an open crack at the door, there he was...... Eric, who was supposed to be at the alter, laid down underneath a woman who passionately straddled him, with her hands gripping his shoulders, as her body rocked back and forth in a circular motion, throwing her head back in pleasure. While their moans of undeniable ecstasy filled the rooms atmosphere.

The mere sight of them froze me in place. Like the ground fell out from under me.

The woman's back was turned to me, but from her features and the sounds she made, I couldn't shake off the feeling that I knew her.

The blood rose hair. The voice.

The butterfly tattoo on her back........and then it hit me like a slap to the face.

"That's my sister".

~Clarissa's POV~

This couldn't be real.

But it was.

I couldn't believe it. Let alone understand it.

My sister.......Mia? My own flesh and blood?

Could betray me so deeply, as I watched her intimately entangled with the man I had dedicated five years of my life to and was to marry hours ago. But here he was, having the time of his life at my expense.

Time seemed to stop, as I felt the walls close in on me. With the crushing reality staring me dead in the eye.

My breath got caught in my throat, as tears spilled freely, blurring my vision.

My heart ached, like a sharp dagger was driven into it, when my knees gave out, as I stumbled back lightly.

How? How could two important people in my life do this to me...... especially Eric?.

The bitter thought gnawed at my chest that ached from watching what unfolded before me, as a mix of pain and rage engulfed me still rooted down in the same spot I stood.

But I knew one thing for sure, I would rather get hit by a moving truck, than watch them make a fool of me any longer, as I barged through the doors hysterically.

"Eric!. I bawled out. "How could you do this to me? and with my sister of all people?". I questioned, my voice hoarse with disbelief.

Upon my intrusion they hastily pulled apart from each other, but rather than feeling remorseful, Eric whose eyes once filled with adoration, now glared back cold and contemptuous. While a sickening, defiant smirk stretched on Mia's lips, who stood behind his frame like a child seeking protection.

"What are you doing here Clarissa?" he asked, his voice devoid of warmth.

"What am I doing here?" I shrieked, my voice raw with disbelief and fury, at the level of his sheer audacity to ask me that.

"Shouldn't I be the one asking that?" Today is our wedding day, Eric! Our wedding day!"

"But instead of being at the alter, you ditched me just to be in bed with her!". my gaze now snapped to Mia, with her face twisted into a victorious smug.

"And you, Mia! How could you? My own sister!" I bellowed, as my fingers made jabbing gestures at both of them.

Mia stepped forward, her eyes glinting with a malicious satisfaction. "Oh, Clarissa. Always so naive, aren't you? Did you really think he'd marry you? she scoffed. You're nothing but a gold digger, chasing his money and his status. That's all you've ever been."

My mouth opened, but no sound came out. Only gasps.

Dry. Desperate. Choking.

"What are you talking about?" I finally questioned, my sore eyes widened with disbelief at her pronouncement.

"That's a lie! and you know it" I screamed, with fresh tears streaming down my face.

"I love Eric! And I have always been faithful to him! Always!".

"Your the one who has never liked him, and constantly wanted me to break up with him, just because you presumed he was arrogant and with me just for fun. But it's clear now that it was all just a facade to hide your true intentions". I furiously spat out, as I sized her up with sheer disdain.

My eyes darted back to Eric who stood silent, watching us bicker before him, as my irritation grew rapidly.

"Eric say something!". I demanded, but his countenance remained unchanged.

"What do you want me to say, Clarissa" he scoffed, a harsh, dismissive sound that pierced my heart. Sounding nothing like the man whose voice always spoke lovingly to me.

"You can start by explaining yourself, why you abandoned me on the most important day of our lives". I retorted, as my nostrils flared and my brows furrowed into a scowl.

But rather than speak up, he turned away, grabbed at an envelope on the bedside table, and aggressively threw it in my direction, as a stack of photographs went flying out in the open air, falling at my feet like confetti.

I looked down and didn't need to pick them up to reveal it's content, when I saw unflattering, scandalous images of myself on the night of my bachelorette, in bed with two strange men whose faces were blurred and unrecognizable. I knew this because I was wearing the exact same dress from that night, with my eyes closed.

My breath hitched.

My stomach churned, and I felt a wave of heat over me as beads of sweat formed across my forehead, staring wide eyed at the horrifying images before me.

"W....where did you get these?

How did you get these pictures?" I asked, visibly enveloped by confusion.

"Does it even matter how or where I got them" Eric snarled.

"You preach about being faithful. You call this faithful, Clarissa?. Gesturing his fingers at the explicit pictures on the floor. "You swore you were a virgin! You denied me for months, for years, for this? While you were out cavorting with God knows who in this damn city?". Eric venomously spat out, his voice dripping with contempt.

"No!" "No, this isn't real! I don't even know these men!

"I.....I was drugged, Eric! I woke up in an unfamiliar room, I don't remember anything from last night! I swear, I am still pure! I was saving myself for you! Believe me". I cried, my voice cracking with desperation, in my attempt to persuade him, to remember the years of devotion, and the sacrifices I had made.

Our relationship may look perfect to the outside world, but we could never seem to get past one deal breaker......No sex until marriage. Which constantly made us argue but we always found a common ground and made up just like any other couple. Heaven knows I have never laid with any other man, not to talk of fantasizing about sleeping with anyone who wasn't Eric.

But neither did I think he would actually cheat on me, just to quench his sexual thirst.

Eric didn't even flinch.

"Believe you? he mockingly scoffed. It's clear that ship has already sailed Clarissa".

"You think I'd marry someone who treats me like a fool?".

"Really Eric? So is that the reason why you slept with my sister? And for what.....payback? For something I didn't even do". I furiously clapped back, feeling even more irritable.

"Oh, please, Clarissa. Drop the innocent virgin act? It's tired, dear sister. Eric knows the truth. You were never with him for love, were you? Just for the name, the money." Mia let out a derisive laugh, spewing out more malicious words, adding more ignition to the already blazing flame between us.

"It was you? Wasn't it?". I shrieked

"Your the one who set me up. Tell him! Tell him the truth, you conniving snake!" I declared, seeing her deceitful smirk finally dropping, replaced by a flicker of triumph.

"And! So what if it was me? I'm just simply helping Eric to finally see you for what you are, and you aren't as good as you claim". Mia cruelly spoke out with no ounce of remorse in her voice. As my aching chest tightened up even more, making my breath even more shallow.

"Why are you doing this Mia? Your supposed to be my sister?". the question came out as a broken sob, as tears spilled down my flushed cheeks. The sheer cruelty of her actions incomprehensible.

Her smile widened, a predatory gleam in her eyes. "Sisters?" she scoffed, her voice laced with venom. "Oh, Clarissa, you've always been so naive. Did you really think you were ever truly part of this family? Did you truly believe you were my mother's daughter?"

My mind reeled. "What are you talking about?"

Mia leaned in, her voice a cruel whisper that sliced through the last strands of my composure. "You're not 'pure blood,' Clarissa. Not like me.

You're the result of our father's dirty little secret, his affair with his mistress. She died giving birth to you, you know. That's why Mother always treated you like a second class citizen, why she always preferred me. You were never truly one of us. You were just... an inconvenient truth."

The world seemed to stop, slowing down it's gravity. As the air rushed out of my lungs.

That was impossible.

Maybe she said it just to hurt me even more. I thought.

But looking back, her words held a depth of truth. Like how Mia's needs always came first before mine. How she was constantly praised and put on a pedestal, while I was the overlooked daughter, the background character who always had to surpress my feelings and undermine my achiements just so she could shine like the star our parents painted her to be. I practically lived in her shadow.

And my mother, who had always seemed distant and unusually cold, now her behavior made a terrifying, sickening sense.

I wasn't just betrayed by my fiance and my sister; but my entire life, my very identity, was all a lie.

"Oh, and Clarissa. Mia continued, now stepping forward, pulling me into an embrace and then whispered, "You were right dear sister, It was I who drugged you and paid does men to set you up that night. Think of it as my bachelorette gift to you". Her voice was a purr, laced with a malicious satisfaction that made my stomach churn.

I had a hunch she had a hand in it, but hearing her confess to it and with a lack of empathy or regret in her tone.

Something instantly snapped inside of me, as a guttural roar tore from my throat. All logic, all sense of reason, dissolved into a blinding haze of red, consumed by a burning rage.

I couldn't tell if it was out of instinct or a surge of adrenaline, that made me grab at her hair and yanked it back with force, enough to break her neck.

A sharp cry of pain escaped her lips as I slammed hard, painful slaps that sent a resounding crack echoing through the room, across her face. Again and again, my hand connected, fueled by years of silent suffering, of feeling secondary, of being an outsider. Mia stumbled back, her face contorting in pain and surprise, before she collapsed to the floor with a painful yelp.

Just as I moved closer to lunge at her again,to claw and scratch and unleash every ounce of the fury that had been building within me, Eric stepped forward, halting me in my tracks. As his powerful hands gripped my arms, pulling me back. His face obviously masked with disdain.

"Enough, Clarissa," he thundered, his voice laced with a disgust that pierced through my rage. He pushed me away, and for a fleeting moment, I thought he might finally see the truth, might finally choose me.

But then he turned. His eyes, devoid of any warmth, any recognition of the five years we'd spent together, focused on Mia, who was now dramatically sobbing on the floor. He knelt beside her, his arms going around her protectively. The choice was clear, agonizingly clear.

"Did you see that Eric? Can you see what she did to me? Look at my face". she breaks down into sobs, crocodile tears glistening in her eyes, gesturing at the red marks on her cheeks.

"Is this who you really want to marry? A thug? A raging mad woman?". Mia's voice, quivered as she spoke through tears, addressing Eric with accusation.

Eric's expression hardens as he turns to me, his tone resolute.

"You need to leave!".

"Get out, Clarissa," he said, his voice emotionless. "Get out of my house. Now!"

"It's over. We're over. The engagement is off." Eric pronounced, his words flat, final, and devastating, resonated through the room. Each syllable a hammered blow to my already fractured heart.

I stared back, stunned.

As my world collapsed around me.

The fairy tale, the dream, the love I believed in, all shattered into a million irreparable pieces.

~Clarissa's POV~

The words echoed in the sudden silence, each one a hammered blow shattering the last fragments of my world.

The engagement was off. My love, my future, my very identity, all obliterated in a single, brutal moment.

I stared at him, at the man who once promised to love me forever, who kissed my scars and held me through my lowest moments, now cradling my treacherous sister, and the years we had spent together, the dreams we had built, felt like nothing more than a cruel joke.

Now he looked at me like a stranger.

An intruder. An infested rodent to be eradicated.

"What?" I say, my voice a whisper, struggling to fathom the situation unfolding before me.

"B....but she admitted it!" I cried. "Eric, she just said she drugged me! She set everything up!"

But despite my pleas, his eyes didn't soften. Not even a little.

This couldn't be happening.

Not like this.

"Eric". I shrieked. "Are you really choosing her over me? Your fiancee?"

"Ex fiancee" he immediately retorted coldly, as my already shattered heart plummeted from his renounce.

"She's not the liar here". he bit back. "Leave Clarissa, before I have to drag you out myself".

My breathe hitched in my throat, and something inside me died in that moment. Now realizing I was fighting a loosing game.

Years of love. Memories. Laughter.

Gone like smoke.

And without another word, I turned and stormed away, pushing through the hallway, with my heels clicking furiously across the marble floors, out the door, out of his life.

Out of a lie I thought was love.

**********************

Bursting out through the towering doors, was when I realized the sun had set, as darkness stretched all over.

The night was cold.

As rain, heavy and relentless, poured down, mirroring the torrent of tears that blurred my vision. Pelting my skin like needles as I wandered the empty streets of the city, the tulle of my once beautiful wedding gown, heavy, soaked, and clinging to my trembling frame.

My veil clung to my face. My heels snapped on the pavement until I kicked them off and continued barefoot, each step numb and raw.

I couldn't flag down a taxi, neither could I book an Uber to take me home, since I wasn't with my phone or had any money on me. After I had practically fled from the church empty handed and without a thought.

My mind was a whirlwind of agonizing revelations: Eric's betrayal, Mia's calculated cruelty, and the devastating truth about my own parentage. Each discovery was a fresh wound, twisting in my gut.

Everything hurt.

I had nothing. No family. No fiance. No identity that I could call my own.

Just pain. And the dull ache in my stomach from starving myself for weeks just to fit into the dress that now hung on me like a joke.

The wind howled.

I didn't know where I was going, Or if I even cared.

All I knew was I needed to see someone......anyone.....who wouldn't look at me like a disgrace.

Somehow, through the blur of tears and the haze of shock, I recognized the familiar street.

Diane's place. My only refuge.

I dragged my exhausted body to her doorstep and fumbled for the bell.

Seconds passed. And then the door swung open, and Diane's face, initially lit with surprise and a welcoming smile, quickly contorted with alarm as she took in my drenched, disheveled state.

"Clarissa? Oh my God! What happened?" she gasped, her voice laced with concern.

But the words never formed on my lips. The world tilted, then spun, and the crushing weight of everything finally overwhelmed me.

Diane's voice was the last thing I heard before my knees gave out, collapsing into her arms.

And then darkness wrapped around me like a cloak.

***********************

"That low life,cheating bastard!".

Diane's voice, usually a soothing balm, cracked through the calm morning air like thunder as I lay half awake on her couch, wrapped in a blanket, still in yesterday's oversized hoodie and unwashed hair. I blinked, disoriented, as she paced the living room like a lioness ready to maul someone.

"I swear to God, if I ever see Eric again, I'll shove those wedding photos he never took with you right up his sorry ass!"

Her phone was clenched in one hand, trembling with rage.

I didn't have to ask why. I had told her everything the night before between choking sobs, cups of water, and the sting of fresh betrayal bleeding from my soul.

"And Mia!", Diane spat the name like poison. "That treacherous snake. I never liked her anyway."

She turned to me, her arms flailing with indignation.

"You remember last Christmas when she accidentally spilled red wine on your white designer jumpsuit and said it was because she tripped? Please! The bitch was smiling the whole time. And don't even get me started on how she tried to flirt with that intern you brought to brunch two years ago......the gay one, might I add."

I gave a weak, breathless laugh. It almost hurt to find anything remotely funny.

"God, Clarissa..." Diane's voice softened as she dropped onto the couch beside me, pulling me into a gentle hug.

"You didn't deserve any of this. I mean it. Not one damn thing. But you can't let them win by breaking you."

My voice was barely a whisper. "I just feel... hollow."

She smoothed my matted hair back. "I know, honey. But this? This isn't the end. It's just a messy, godawful chapter in a much bigger story. And trust me, the plot twist coming for you? Muah.....Chef's kiss. But you've gotta hold on. You've gotta fight." Diane lovingly encouraged.

I wanted to believe her. I really did.

But a week passed, and all I became was a ghost in Diane's apartment. The world outside felt hostile, judging. I'd seen the headlines online, even when I tried to avoid them:

"BRIDE ABANDONED AT ALTAR FOR SISTER!" and "SOCIETY WEDDING ENDS IN SHOCKING BETRAYAL!".

Every news alert, every whisper on social media felt like a dagger.

I didn't go outside. I didn't answer calls. My phone buzzed relentlessly for the first three days, then slowly, pitifully, it stopped. People moved on.

But I stayed stuck.

I stopped eating. I drank instead. Finding solace in the red wines Diane stacked in her kitchen cabinet.....a quiet escape, a temporary numbing of the relentless ache in my chest. Each sip brought a fleeting sense of peace, a fuzzy blanket over the raw edges of my reality.

Diane tried. God, she tried. But there's only so much someone else can do when you're already drowning.

Part of me, a small, desperate part, clung to a ridiculous hope. I'd check my phone obsessively, refreshing my notifications, imagining a text from Eric. A message saying he was wrong, that he needed me back, that he was sorry. A delusional whisper in the back of my mind told me he'd realize his mistake, that this was all a terrible misunderstanding.

But that message never came.

What did come was a notification.

I blinked at my screen, expecting another pitiful reminder from Pinterest about wedding ideas I no longer needed, or maybe another dry post from an aunt telling me to "stay strong."

But instead, a fresh sting of pain ripped through me when a social media notification popped up.

It was from Eric's profile.

He obviously hadn't blocked me yet.

I shouldn't have opened it.

But I did.

It was a photo. And another. And another. All of him and Mia. Laughing. Holding hands. And what twisted the knife of betrayal even deeper was the location tag: "On a yacht in the Maldives", the same private island we had painstakingly chosen for our honeymoon.

He wore the linen shirt I bought him. She wore the designer swimwear I had once modeled and sent him a picture of, asking if he thought it was sexy enough.

The caption read:

"When love surprises you in unexpected ways #Bliss #ForeverBeginsNow".

I scrolled.

Jet skiing.

Candlelight dinners on the beach.

Horseback rides through the surf.

Every single thing from my itinerary. The one I had curated for months in a shared G***le Doc titled "Forever Begins Here."

They were living the honeymoon I planned. Together. My dreams, was now their reality.

It hit me like a freight train, this wasn't a nightmare I could wake from. This was real.

He wasn't coming back.

Not today.

Not tomorrow.

Not ever.

The realization landed with the force of a physical blow, knocking the wind out of me. The alcohol no longer brought solace, only a bitter taste in my mouth.

I dropped the phone onto the bed like it had burned me. The ache in my chest turned molten. Something inside me snapped, but not like before, not in pain.

In rage. Cold, focused rage.

"No more crying," I whispered to the mirror as I stared at my sunken eyes, the dull shadow of the woman I used to be.

"No more waiting."

And that's when it popped up.

A seductive ad, bold against the pale light of my phones screen:

"Need to feel again? Escape heartbreak. Find your pleasure. Join ECSTASY. Your Discreet Hookup App for Adults."

Download Now.

My thumb hovered over it.

A small voice inside me said, Don't do it. That this wasn't me.

But another voice.....a reckless curiosity, a desire to feel anything different, louder, darker asked.

Why the hell not?

He moved on without a second thought.

Maybe it was time I did the same.

Maybe it was time Clarissa Jones stopped breaking.... and started burning.