SPLIT BETWEEN THREE WORLDS

Ethan POV

Tenesse Juvenile Correction Facility

I sat on the pane of my window as I stared further into the forest that encompassed the whole correction facility under the eerily dark night sky, lost in my own thoughts and fantasies. With my legs dangling outside, I felt the cool chilly night breeze from six floors below crash against my exposed skin bringing about small pimply bumps. It didn't bother me a bit that I was only dressed in my underwear and that every time a cold breeze whizzed by, I shivered. It didn't matter if I would freeze because the sound of night owls, wind whistling past the trees, leaves rustling and the feeling of being in complete darkness oddly brought a tranquil feeling to my crazily troubled mind and soul.

Every night as was my tradition, after all the lights in the facility were switched off, I made it a personal quest not to miss a moment of the serene midnight sensation. I always allowed myself to be swallowed by the night, forget everything about my real life and indulge myself in the fantasies and fictional creations of my artistic mind, take a break from the harsh reality that has grown to become an ordinary affair in my life over the years. I would rather miss a meal and good sleep but not a self-meditation engagement.

I was officially eighteen years, just turned about forty five minutes ago and nothing seemed different at all. It was just like the other previous nights I had spent on this window just wondering why I exist and why I wasn't dead or murdered already.

Happy birthday, yay! , I told myself inwardly then scoffed. Birthdays were ridiculous, they held no particular importance in your life apart from only existing to remind you that you are getting older and closer to your deathbed, reminding you that this was the start of another year of torture. Don't get me wrong, ever since I was born I was all in for birthdays, I believed in birthdays, believed that birthdays should be celebrated just like Christmas was, I always looked forward to celebrating my birthdays with the whole lot of my family. Well, that was until the night of my seventh birthday. After the events that had transpired on my seventh birthday, I always hated birthdays to the core, abhorred them in fact. Every other year on my birthdays ever since, I was reminded of the traumatizing occasions that I so longed to forget. I had tried hard drugs, insomnia pills, pain that was self-induced, psychologists, religious persons some of whom dealt voodoo stuff on me, I had literally tried everything...but I couldn't rub that five-minute memory from my mind. The memory was like super glued- stuck to my head, it was always stuck on replay, like it was on a loop of some sort. My birthdays were my nightmare.

I had tried everything, everything in my power, everything in the scope of my imagination, everything except one thing....

I blinked then turned my gaze to the asphalt pathway that was six floors down. This had to be the only remaining solution that I had left, being finally relieved from my depressed life. I had never attempted to make this kind of decision before, never even thought of it, yet it has always been right under my nose. The pace of my breathing rushed at the prospect of the thought, I could make my eighteenth birthday different if I wished it to, I could take a perpetual break from this horrible life if I wished to, I could reunite with my family if I wished to. I only had to make one big decision, a decision that I ought to have made years ago.

My eyes darted around just to confirm if there was someone watching, confirming because everyone was always asleep at this time and not that I cared if someone watched, no one loved me that much to miss me if I was gone. I would be like a shooting star, passing but still shining, though dim but still flashing. I knew I had left no major footprint of my existence in this world, I knew that I owned nothing except for my body and mind, no one to mourn me. Heck, with my frail body I would take the smallest space in the cemetery. I took a deep breathe then closed my eyes.

With only a small movement, I could be falling to freedom, falling to ecstasy and leaving the life of sorrow behind. I smiled at that thought, the first genuine smile I have ever mastered since eleven years ago, a smile of relief. I could almost see the faces of my family smiling at me in my mind, their welcoming arms stretched out in a warm embrace, my mom crying in literal joy, my dad smiling from ear to ear his eyes wet, my younger twin sisters chuckling while looking at me, my three elder brothers grinning at me, my uncle and aunt smiling contentedly, my grandfather nodding at me encouragingly. I missed them. I could feel a tear trickle down from my eye and on my dry cheek then on my bare chest.

"I'm coming" I whispered "Finally, I am coming home"

Home is wherever family is, my family was in paradise and I longed to join them there. In a matter of seconds I will join them, I must join them, I couldn't bare anymore , I couldn't continue to carry the whole load of the physical and emotional torture I have put up with since eleven years ago. It was time I let go and join them.

I saw my father beckon towards me with a smile.

My mom mouthed 'come here my son, we miss you'

I couldn't stop the tears that now trickled uncontrollably from my eyes, I sobbed silently in joy. My family was right there in the warmness of the ethereal light, waiting for me to step unto their threshold and towards them. I just had to make the step.

" I'm coming" I whispered then opened my eyes to take one final look of the facility that has been my home for three years, more like a prison and I was a captive. I would not miss anything or anyone.

I took another deep breath, closed my eyes then slowly slanted forward....

Gravity only took control over my body for a split second before someone grabbed my right arm. I opened my eyes snappily as I was pulled back into my room.

" What the hell is wrong with you? Were you planning to kill yourself?" a voice scolded.

The window was closed and my curtains drawn shut. This was followed by the blinding light of my room's bulb.

" I have warned you numerous times Ethan about sitting on the window late at night, you could have died horribly had I been a second later"

I silently stood up from the cold floor then made for my bed, it was a bed made from steel with a thin brown mattress. My mattress that has been used for three long years, so used that it was now more of a carpet or a door mat. I picked my drape from the rusty sink next to my bed.

I curled myself on my bed then used the patchy drape to cover whatever it could on my body.

" I have warned you about ignoring your supervisors but nothing can get through past your thick skull, can it?"

My drape was roughly pulled from my body.

I averted my gaze to the woman who has been the supervisor for our wing. She was about my height and I was pretty tall, not that tall, it was a height that was taller than the average sized man. The woman was fat, really fat to her face... and strong too. Her hugeness was one of the main reasons that she became the only woman who worked in the juvenile facility for boys. Her face was petrifying as always, bold purple make up and really fierce eyes. She was in her mid-ages , forty or fifty, mid-age was a respectful term but I liked to refer to her as old...in my head. I once saw her beat a full grown man senseless because of a single joke about her physique.

" Why would you want to destroy that pretty face of yours?" she asked as she sat on the edge of my bed. It squealed in protest then sank towards her side.

" Look at me" she snapped

I ignored and stared away from her.

" I said..." her tone rose but she stopped mid-way. I heard her heave a deep sigh before I felt her hand settle on my thigh, softly.

" I'm sorry" I said in a frail voice still not looking at her.

" Sit up" she ordered

I didn't waste a second to do as I was informed. I sat close to the headrest of my bed...further away from her, my knees close to my chest and my arms around it.

" Did you take supper?"

I hesitated. I remember I missed it because I overspent my time in the art room.

" You missed it again?" she shot

" You know very well that you need the energy" she sighed then took out an energy drink " good thing I came prepared"

I cautiously darted my eyes to the bottle.

" Drink it" she commanded

I was planning on giving a pass but then my stomach grumbled loudly. The last time I remember eating was in the morning and it was just a cup of porridge.

The supervisor sighed then took out two protein bars. She handed me both of them.

I hesitated for a moment before I devoured everything in a record of thirty seconds. That meal wasn't enough to make me full but at least it satisfied the hunger pangs in my stomach, I felt a little bit better after consuming it.

" Thank you" I more of whispered

" I have two sets of news for you, one is the bad news and the other good news" She said sitting more comfortably on my bed " Which should I start with?"

Everything that comes out of your mouth is always bad news, might as well start with the bad, I thought to myself.

" I'll start with the bad news" she said " Are you ready?"

I stared at her blankly

" Tomorrow morning you will get out of this place, you are eighteen right?"

My eyes brightened up but I didn't smile. Was she kidding me or being serious?

" Legally, when you reach eighteen we are not supposed to hold you in here anymore so..."

That is the greatest news I've ever heard, the greatest birthday gift, my wish to get out of this forsaken place was granted. I have never felt happier.

" That's a bummer because we won't spend time together anymore, you'll miss me, won't you?"

" No" I said

" Meh, I'll miss your silent company" she shrugged " The good news is that..."

I sighed

" Cheer up Ethan, at least smile a bit" the supervisor bumped me on my shoulder roughly

" The good news is that we have this night to ourselves, five hours till morning to ourselves. And since you are legally an adult, I won't have to muffle my screams anymore during our activity...."

" Not tonight" I said

" What? Excuse me?" her expression becoming stern

" I said not tonight, I'm not feeling well" I replied my heart picking up pace

" Well, you don't have a choice honey" she scoffed then proceeded to rip my trouser from my body

" Please..." I pleaded

" Didn't you just eat my protein bars and drink my energy drink, nothing's free so you gotta pay up...and since I don't need your money because you don't got any , Imma take another of your services"

You are probably wondering why I'm not fighting back at all. I have three particularly simple answers for you. In this specific juvenile correction facility, they break you both physically and emotionally. The abuse you get here makes you fear and respect your superiors without a second thought. The second reason is that everything that happens here always remains here, no other person from outside or the government gets to know. If you ever try to fight they might as well kill you and no one will miss you afterwards, we simply have no voice. The third reason is that silence and cowering is the only mode of survival, you try to be brave and the next thing you know, you are dying of hunger or thirst or in most cases, thorough beatings.

I had an extra reason for today though, I wanted to live another day so that I see the outside of this damned place. And thus, just as I have done numerous uncountable nights before, I laid back and let the supervisor exploit my body as she thought fit.

I tossed and turned the entire night, sleep not seemingly ready to get a hold of me. No matter how hard I shut my eyes, my mind was so adamant on keeping me awake with thoughts of leaving the facility. The mixture of excitement and anticipation made me antsy like an ant with it's tail on hot embers. Before I even knew it, the early morning birds were already ushering in a new day. I gave up trying to force sleep and snappily sprung from my bed.

Without a second thought, I packed all my belongings in one small bag. They were nothing much, just a pair of two trousers, three shirts and a toothbrush. Taking one last look at the room that has been my home for quite a period of time, I felt nothing but relief. I wasn't gonna miss it, not a single bit, I hated the place as much as I hated my birthdays. I took a deep heavy sigh, ignoring the intense rumbles that originated from my stomach as I sprinted outside the forsaken room.

I felt pitiful for the other kids who gave me green looks of envy when I was escorted to the admission block with my luggage. I never made actual friends in my stay here so I was spared the awkward goodbye moments.

" It's sad to see you leave" the admissions officer said, the way he said it seemed rehearsed. He didn't even look up from his stack of papers.

" I'm happy on the contrary" I spoke back

" life outside there is unforgiving, at least in here you have a roof over your head and food to keep you warm. Where are you going to anyway?"

I hesitated for a moment, my mind chaotic with thoughts

"FiendVille" I sighed

The admissions officer paused then slowly gazed up to me from his desk. His eyes which peered from the top of his glasses showing a stupefied look, like I said the most insane thing.

" It's...it's my home town" I quickly added

" Erick..."

" Ethan- Ethan Blaze" I corrected

He took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes " Look Ethan, FiendVille isn't the kind of place for a kid"

" I'm an adult now"

" Doesn't matter, the town's not a place you just go to for a new start. Do you watch the news Ethan?"

" No I don't"

" If you did then you'd realize that the number of killings in FiendVille triples the ones in all other towns combined. It's the most dangerous town in the whole state." He said seriously " a kid like you wouldn't last a week"

" It's still my home"

" You don't have any family or relatives to go back to, there is no inheritance left in your name and apart from the rugs inside your bag, you own nothing else" he continued jabbing

I sighed, my mind direly hoping that he would just sign my leaving form and hand me over my ID. I have had three years to think everything through, getting home topped the list.

" We can always use an extra hand in this facility. That means that we will provide you with better accommodation, better food and you can earn some bucks while at it. What do you think?"

" No thanks" I said immediately, not even glorifying his offer with a single thought. I wasn't staying a day more in here and I had made up my mind. The more minutes I wasted in here, the more I felt like needles were pricking my back.

Clicking in disappointment, he roughly signed the form then pushed it towards me. I hastily picked it up together with my ID then stood there for a second longer...

" What?"

" Aren't you forgetting something?" I smiled

The officer opened a drawer and took out a stack of dollar notes. I was already beaming with excitement when he started counting them. My smile froze when he handed me twenty dollars

" You are supposed to give me two hundred" I said

" I don't run a charity organization Erick"

" It's Ethan" I heaved

" I don't care" He snapped " be glad I'm even giving you cash, heaven knows how much I've spend feeding your large appetite"

I was going to retort that we worked in a farm for the food we ate but I chose to keep silent and take my starting cash. Not mentioning that the law required every leaver to be offered a generous amount of cash and two hundred was the base-line.

" Thank you" I smiled

" Get the fuck out of here" he put on his glasses and got back to his papers

Getting to the bus station proved a difficult task but I managed anyway after a kind bystander gave me directions, for two dollars. I bought a fifteen dollar ticket to the dreaded FiendVille then used the rest of the cash to buy me something to eat. The bus was filled with empty seats, about eight a dozen people including me booked a ticket. All of them looked hideous and spooky in a mysterious way but I cared no less.

I spent half of the eight-hour drive to FiendVille gazing outside the bus's window like an excited foreign tourist or an ecstatic dog, spent the rest sleeping after my heavy eyelids paved way for a ravenous sleep.

I was woken up hours later by a knock on my window. I had enjoyed my sleep so much that drool had rolled over and covered half my face. The bus driver gave me an amused expression before showing me the door. " I have to get to my family" he said

It was in the late evening when I alighted and the scene was far from what I had expected. The reality greatly differed from the dreadful stories that was showered on this town. FiendVille was as lively as ever at the time, people laughed as they walked around while chatting spiritedly. Bright lights illuminated every bit of the spot where I was dropped off and for meters on end. For a town that was supposed to be a murderous one, it sure was animated. I didn't have much to reminisce since as a kid I didn't walk around much but I got the sense of happiness. It sounded weird but I felt like I belonged here in this town.

Like a blind person who just saw light for the first time, I walked around FiendVille taking in the sight that I had missed so much. My stomach rumbled in protest when I spotted a restaurant.