Ricko's unexpected life turn

Ricko was a humble, pure, kind soul until he reach 26 and then his life was never ....

The same.....

I wonder sometime why bullies, cold heart, cruel sociopath, will want to teach their own kids that hurting and feeding on other feelings is the way to success< I wonder what happened to them, why they need to break, use, control, humiliate good heart

I wonder why is it that such humans being gets to seat in a comfortable chair, sleep in luxury beds, eat deluxe meals, go to 5 stars resort, travel anywhere they want, get reward and thanks from people who see them has good, get compliments, presents, money while using and scamming and leaving off others generosity, get a security life, new cars and safety with a large house to call home, //// While other seat on grounds and feel cold all night, sleep on the street dirty floors, have no bathtubs, no hot water, hundreds of rats in their home, families of cockroach surrounding all their precious belonging and crawling all over the room, unsafe neighbors, who harass and disgrace their things weekly, rob their cars, destroy their peace on a daily basis, threat, scare them, have to line up for free food, get started by strangers while they smile back at them, walk along the path of looser who sabotage and spit on them, get violated by bandit, , , , , "Here is the story of one of Ricko's abuser"

"What goes around comes around" Life turn around, see let's start over and re-analyze this:

This losers who gets the safety, money, comfort, gratitude, admiration of others, have burry his flaws, sins, lies for so long!!!!! that somewhere along the way, something is going to get overflow and it will need to feed more and more on others pain to survive but they can only go so far unless they decide to face their sin which is most likely to never happen!!! since they cross the path of non return, the path of the dead zombie leaving just enough space for their 15% of old being, the person that they used to be before it all started, so that tiny little part left of them is the one who is keeping old friends, memories and any past attachment that remind them who they were and has long has they have theses, they can still convince themselves and others that everything is just fine!!! That nothing is changed, that they have not lived in pain, sin and using their power of cruel intention everyday for the last 20 years.

Sad truth why is some people choose to deal with their suffering this way, they accumulate so much untold issues that they can't seem to resolve that they slowly start to regain they authority, strength, power and security by sucking on good hearted human, !!!! That is to me pitiful and weak! Shame on them and time is running out, something will go wrong and god or whatever spiritual force out there will know exactly how to deal with these type of people. It is just a matter of time, they're is up and down in life for everyone, in different point of time.

Introduction:

Once upon a time there was this weird story I was going to tell but I wasn't sure how and when I was going to do it because it was so sad and so weird that myself couldn't understand it and i wasn't sure that others would be able too but I had a friend who ask me to tell it by using other name in the story so in honor of her life and happy ending existence: she leaves, now with her husband of 3 years and has 4 kids, 2 prior and 2 with him.

So there was berta and ricko they were brother and sister and they were celina the mother, and elisa, emilia the sisters.

This story will start to take place in 2008 in Europe, let's say, berta was 26, ricko 29, elisa 21 and emilia 32 and the mother was 50.

Berta was so much fun she loved to play outdoors, any sports, meeting people and talking to the neighbors, working with kids at the museum was her summer job and she party all week-ends with friends, she never rarely had 1 night without visitor coming by the house, she was so demanded by phone, by mans, by friend, everyone cherish her and admire her, sure they were others who didn't like her, elisa her sister had only 2 friends and was into study and stay home all the time, she was a snitch, repeating everything to Celina and even make up lies and cried over nothing, she always complain about everything, and emilia, was liked in her school, sportive, talented drawer on the conservative side, she liked berta but she also could create huge dramas and commission when she felt like it, she had a weird personality she was scared of height, driving to fast, the thunder and so many things like roller coasters ect..., , but never for too long they usually changed their mind or forever kept distance for some reason i think they were afraid to begin to become nice if they had to talk to her so since they chose to be pissed then not much we could do for them. Berta always had a new ideas, new ways to improve fun and existence in general, always knew about the newest coolest spot to go too, people like her peacefulness mind, fun and relax presence, she simply never got upset, in the 10 years they had knew her since elementary, she was the very shy, sweet, silly type of kid who engage everyone into playing with eachother but nothing had changed she had a way about her, her loyal friendship, peace spirit will connect others who usually wouldn't get along, and this way she was remarkably recognise to be a peacemaker, someone you could call at any hour and talk to someone you could ask anything, someone you could always rely on and someone to be your best friend when you needed one, Berta was like the super star of the all neighnotood but some people will take her kindness for granted of course and she was so sweet that she will lose friends, regain friends because her inability to see the bad in others she will only concentrate of people good quality lets just say that is really all she could see. Having such peace inside was generating strength and drive into berta she was so happy all the time she couldn't get enough of life, then one day everything started to change, after leaving and growing up surrounded with so much attention in the family the focus on berta toward her sister and brother strike deep jealousy and develop resentment, hate that later build up into more hate, but with berta's brother it was different at least she thought it was different, they were close and she help him to find his first girlfriends and always wanted to set him up but he was to shy to go out there, he admire her for her ability to easily make friend with anyone anywhere, that was her special talent, she could come across any type of person and a few minute later they would be laughing having a drink, even the most looking depressed people. Berta felt bad for her brother because he never had a girlfriend until he was 24 and they all left him and broke his heart, while she never had trouble finding mans they usually were at her feet, line up for her, she try to hook him out and find ways to find him a good woman but it never work so she even tried dating site and had to post picture for him but he wouldn't even check to see if he had message, she came out of ideas after trying for 5 years, After moving from Portugal in Europe to Japan, she needed to start over, fresh start from her over possessive manipulative cruel mother and abusive boyfriends, she had so many boyfriend that instead of meeting only the good ones she started to come across some very violent, possessive, destructive one who made her life a living hell and even started to annoy her family. Ricko seem to always try to keep up with her boyfriend like berta was his little trophy sister, he was proud of her and knew guys really find her attractive and maybe he wish he could have been the same with woman and woman will find him irresistible but that never happen, because he had no confidence and was too shy to make the first move instead he started to be vindictive and develop a drug addiction and turn his vindictive thoughts towards hate for woman, he started to talk about woman like they were object and to be used. Berta knew the truth she knew her brother was deeply heart broken from woman leaving him and he felt so little, so alone, has no one wanted him and it made him feel like a undesirable boy who couldn't grow up maturely into a man body.

Here is how rickos mind work: Work, drink, rest, eat, drink, get stone, get high, smoke, take pills.......watch TV.....Built things.....Smoke again.....=)

Prior to his 27 Birthday Rickos was already starting to develop a drug addiction but he was more sereine and study for a BA Degree at this University, he took his time and allowance for granted and choose to party more than studying for his test and failed a few time before he finally got to retake this exam, but by the time he graduated nothing of his desiring career choice came along so he had to take on a labor position for he kept for the longest time, got promoted there, made good relationships but forgot about his true calling, his true meaning in life and maybe stop dreaming all together, he had spent so much time using his arms in the field that they were no time for study anything and his lost touch with his genius knowledge passion major in chemistry and physics. He would from time to time contemplate his old books and was proud but never considerate looking for a more suitable position, after all, why did he got a degree if it was to end up in the labor industryjQuery21409049390193635398_1524712316200?? I think rickos had lost faith in the world and himself and he was scared, scared of being rejected again just like all of his relationship failure with womans, this only time he came close to one, the woman turn his back on him and never spoke to him again, she was cold and insensitive. It had left many bruises and scars in his heart that had not yet healed and buzz and psychotic drugs were the key to fix the pain once it for all. But for how long?? everyone knows thats drugs are temporary reliefs, they let you zone out for a few years and so you don't need to worry about your past and your trouble and you can strive and be powerful but one day you find yourself weak and tired, tormented and confuse, he didn't remember much and he started to leave in a very dark place, a place where you can feel others pain and suffering, a place where you can hear worries and sickness calling you, a place where everything is pounding heavy and not allowing you to sleep soundly, a place where the word is cold and cruel. A place that Ricko's didn't want to be but didnt know how to leave......

His delusion had started small, then medium them larger they didn't really follow a common path, they came into his dreams, his thoughts and his worst nightmare. All he wanted to do his shut those scary taught!!!! And image down but the more he did the larger they reappear.....

Rickos was smart so once in a while he try to reinvent himself by keeping himself occupy and try to give back to the people in need has much has possible and would give everything

To his family members and it was his way of feeling peace inside. His sister Emilia his cadette was very demanding and controlling, she never cared for him but always reassured him that she did, her action would say different, she will only appear in Rickos life when she needed large money contribution, a vacation discount, or needed someone to cover the cost of a fancy meal and pay for the tips, she know Rocko obey her like a dog and she could ask him almost anything, what made Ricko feel important is that those time, were this only time he felt needed, included in her circle, if she didn't need his financial support she would criticise his choice, demeanors his possessions and laughed at him anyways she could and usually in public so Ricko would feel hurt and shame, but still he didn't believe that Emilia wanted any harms, years went by and his just continue to follow her demand, his other sister Elisa barely had any relationship with him, she seem to be too busy building the perfect dream life illusion she didn't have time for him.

Celina his mother always took charge of did everything for him and treated him like a child but never gave him the chance to respond or have opinion, it's one thing that she wanted to be in charge of his life but it's another thing that she didn't want him to interfere in her project for him and her choices, she didn't allow him to have any say and she could be threatening, and built fear, drama around the rest of the family string, this how she manipulated everyone, using the family attachment and connections. Rickos didn't want to disappoint his mother so he figure that she wanted the best for him at all time and let him take care of his affair until he was 28 years old.

Wich in the long term end up not being such a great idea because once he was settle and a adult now, she abandoned him in a filthy home that she chose for him at the time she was impatient to get rid of him while he was leaving in her home back then and he was now forced to cover all payment and leave in a very threatening environment covered in pest, and insects and rats. He was so good that he just did it!!!! Made payment after payment despise his drug addiction, and his had many late payment because of it, he spent thousands and thousands in fixing the place who was falling apart and the next door neighbor, a pakistani woman came by on the second year he moved in after her ex was convicted to prison for murder. She came at first for solicitation services and to deliver drugs and started to take his soul, mind by mental, emotional abuse, manipulate him for all his money or threat him and stir fear in his life, day after day, she would scream and yell his name from the back of his garden and he would have to run toward her to answer immediately, she would show up from his back door and just let herself in and force him to seat and listen to her lamentation of the world, she would knock at his window, morning until late night, pondering until he gave her what she wanted.

She knew exactly how much she could corrupt him sexually, mentally and physically, Rickos tried to fight this abuse many time but the pain and fear he endure between her and others act of abuse around his home was unbearable, he was shaky, and out of breath, he felt like they were no ways to control all of them and if he wanted some peace and safety he would have to pay them off and so he did!!!! Year after year, day after day, but nothing never stop, nothing never got better, everything escalated and she demanded more money, and she develop such incredible power over ricko's life that now she could get the money she wanted without render any services and she had rip him off for 9 years, she knew how to feel no guilt by blaming him for her short coming and the more power she gained the more demand and corruption, punition he would get.

Ricko was now in any of his action and thoughts, he had try to deal with the situation the best ways he knew how but he remember when his sister Berta had moved to Japan he felt empty and alone and things got so dark for him for he choose to enter a place of self destruction, he started by leaving in the dark and letting spider webs accumulate, abandon any hobbies he had and grow piles of mess in his living room and bedroom, he had no time to go anywhere but home so he could be here when Alyra the pakistan hore would need him and he got so fed up with the rest of the world that he stop fighting all together, he felt had Berta his closest sister didn't care for him and abandon him has well, so he figure that life isn't worth living but since he had things who needed to be paid if he wanted to still have a home he will continue to do the same thing over and over..... For a decade his life was nothing but stress and stress release via unsanity drugs, when he woke in the morning he didn't feel like getting in the shower and get dress and enjoy the weekend maybe somewhere plaisant, a trip perhaps? A movie? A nice place to eat? A event with good people, no his life resumed around the hore and the very rare visit of old co-workers and sometime he would get childhood accointance and family dinner to go to. Drugs, alcohol were just fine and were making everything easy, didn't need to worry anymore about woman who didn't want him and find him repulsive has he imagine they would, he didn't need to clean up his act, find a conversation or decide on how a date would go, cure his addiction, and he started to develop friendship with his abuser since she was always here.

He stop taking care of his mental state, sanitary condition and even let his hair grow, teeth turned brown and yellow. Life has failed him!!!! Big time! But he didnt knew how it happen??? Who had failed him? Was it the fact they he felt unwanted and no woman had never truly wanted a relationship with him? Or was it the fact that he didn't try hard enough? Was it his past regrets, choices, career loss, dream destruction of a bright a happy future even possible? Was it because his mother Celina had never show compassion for his feeling, his well being or his thoughts? Or because she never gave him enough love, affection all together? Was it because Berta was more popular, was wanted by mans and had abandon him? Was it because his home was falling apart and he was a ATM to his neighbor but try so hard to make it appear different by making friendship with them, hanging out with them he could then say that he wasn't a target, a pear, a toy being manipulated in so many ways!!! But the truth is that all of theses factors had contributed in his suffering and life path but all he ever wanted and did was pursuing his faith and commit to his house payment, try to make it a pleasant place to leave, try to make user and abuser happy, try to be accepted by others, hope to be love by his mother the way he should be unconditionally loved by a parent. Ricko had a good soul and generous spirit, inside he wanted everything to work out and didn't want to see that he was being a target, he didn't want to believe that his mother wanted to emotionally harm him and didn't care for him has much has she pretended to be, he didn't want to face that he was terrorised and suffer so much inside that even this idea of confronting the """Slut, HORSE"" will petrify him and break his mind into little of gum.....

The taugh of her punition such has repetitives irrational fear inductions, she could implement into his mind at every moment will enable him to function, to breath, to sleep, to work and he couldn't allow it.WHo Could? No One wants to suffer this way, but everyone one needs a hand but can you help someone if they don't want your help? Can you change someone if they can't follow? Can you save someone if they choose to turn around into this other directions?

Ricko now was in a altered delusional leaving mental state of mind, he had endure too much emotional stress for his soul to cope with rationalisation and building new healthy strength, he's addiction took over his mind and body, he wouldn't compromise it either, this was his comfortable cushion and he was too tired to do anything else, Berta had finally came back and he felt less lonely now, but he took his frustration and anger toward her and he wanted a companion on his misery beside his actual abuser, so he had to keep Berta under his wing by having her possessions she needed and a home and

use emotional abuse that he know had no control over what was right or wrong and use his hate, vindictive jealousy and revenge toward her into a new level, she needed to pay for leaving him alone all theses years!!!! So far she had always been here for him all his life until she left, she wanted the best for him, she wanted him to find this woman who will love him and take care of him, she wish that somehow that women will find him and that all this abuse and corruption will stop, once it for all, she didn't like seeing her brother suffer either, and she try to talk to him and show him the way but he was stubborn and his mind was set on many negativity and nonsens thinking, that it was barely impossible to cross over his mind, she tried for many years to tell him to start over, that his home was what was causing his suffering in the first place, that he needed to stop leaving in pain and go somewhere where womans, humans, friends and neighbors will treat him with the respect that he deserved, (She couldn't get better because he will always be waiting to make sure it didn't happen and she couldn't help him if she didnt get better herself, so it was a tricky dead end situation) but instead he continue to spend money on repairs and work himself to death, spend all his money irresponsibly on drugs and sex and fixing the house that was almost 100 years old.

The delusion is brain had formed due to so much confusion and drug administered in his bloodstream, had dissolute improper fractions of neurons and mix up negative thoughts in a derogatory manner, Ricko couldn't fight any longer.... this only way for him to surpass the pain was to use his developed self defense mechanical response habits, like many of us, do on a daily basis it doesn't mean we all wrong or all perfect, but the problem is that if someone has been deeply abuse they will pre-recreate this abuse to understand it and this will become this only way for them to cope and move on. So Berta became his muse and "he" without her knowing for years{ she remembered feeling unease from his constant interest in her private relationships when she was younger and then she left for Japan, and felt so sick of his weird need to use disgraceful sexual word content in his conversations on the phone or in person, when invading her privacy that she threw herself in multiple sexual relationships, just so she could get this words and thoughts of her brother trying to intrude her bedroom out of her life!!! that she couldn't think of anything else to do but to choose to have has many relationship possible so she could regain her sanity""".

He started to develop sick thoughts toward her, and reduce her to a animal by calling her name and using sexual harassment words and gesture around her, squeezing her buttock, walking slowly by her bedroom late night, smelling her clothes hiding her underwear under his pillow, trying to get into a personal relationship details for some reason. Berta had enough trouble while in Japan, she explore a good deal and learned a lot there, she also got into big trouble herself and leaved with a terrible creature of a freak man who made her go crazy!!! After a few years trapped in stocking situation she came back then to endure more with another ex-stocker who had kept track of her for 8 years trajecture journey and now her 2 daughters were paying the price of it all! Celina had her big part on it too, she knew Ricko was keeping his relationship with Berta 's Stocker and that he was exercising cruelty and sexual harassment but he didn't stop him or Celina for doing something to end it, and invited him to stay longer in his home while she was residing now for a year and did felt bad but he was stock with himself has well and didn't have the strength to fight back this stocker. Berta's dad also was treating the stocker like family witch what seem to appear has off her father was unaware of his actions at the time, Celina during those hard time, was nowhere to be find, she would send out negative remarks, or complaint to Rickos and Berta about everything and only seem to share her peace offering gifts when it was time to destroy something new or good they were working on to get better and feel better.

Rickos became truly deeply sick around this age of 34 when the Pakistani woman had done enough damage for him to build deep extreme psychose and sick thoughts. Ricko was no longer aware of his thoughts nor he had any control, all he wanted was to feel better and good and not hurting anymore.... so like many deep abused person will do, they will start creating their own delusion, imagine their own word, hurt others at their expenses, ignore others feelings, act upon what make them feel powerful, unbeatable, strong, fearful and respected, """he became his abuser """ Someday he could be his old being and act normal but most of the time he realise that he was different and didn't exactly know why, all he knew is that he didn't want to feel weak anymore!!!!

Ricko was the worse version of himself but because he had a good soul he was able to maintain a minimum of decency and his heart was still alive despite all that he had been through. He needed serious Psychological help, but never seek for help.....Never....