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Hello, I am Luma, pleasure!

I am 28 years old,I am a brunette with medium brown hair,skin not so white,my hair hits the height of my lungs,it is straight and with few curls,eye color dark brown.

I live alone in Belo Valle, my apartment is not so big, even because I am not so spacious, I am single, I bank and live a quiet life, well, not so quiet if you look at my work.

My parents are of age and live in the next town over, I have an adopted brother, my parents have raised him since he was very young, his name is Vincent, he is a doctor and lives abroad.

Even though I work a lot, I try to be as present as possible for my parents, because they were the ones who helped me get here and have everything I have nowadays. I love my family very much and they are everything to me.

I was about to forget, I am graduated in psychology and in law, I have a clinic where I work as a psychologist and it is the function that I practice the most, even though I like law, I fell deeply in love with psychology.

This is just a summary of my life so far.

*____________________________________*

I arrive at the clinic late again,I spot my secretary trying to calm down yet another client,the last few days have been complicated for me,I've been having too much insomnia,unfortunately I can't delete from my mind completely,everyone's problem.

"Look there!!!" - Says my secretary smiling. "She's here!"

The woman looks at me seriously.

"It's about time." - She makes an angry face and rolls her eyes boredly.

"Good morning Thaís,good morning ma'am,sorry for the delay,I've had some setbacks."

"Okay."

The woman and I walk into my office and there I hear a bunch of complaints about her life,what did she want me to do?,these people can't solve their most basic problems,they can't just talk to the cause of their irritation,everything is to put the blame on someone else and pay for me to listen and come up with the solution(most obvious) to their problems.

I leave the room after serving 5 people,it was too tiring,I sit in the waiting room and breathe,secrets and complaints wear me out too much.

"Is everything okay Luma?" asks Thais.

"Yes, Thata, but it's tiring, you know..."

"I can imagine, you only come if you consult altered people."

"Yes, and what's worse, they want me to hand over the solution to their problems on a platter.

But the phone rings and she answers:

"Prado Clinic, can I help you?

You only have vacancies for tomorrow. No, ma'am, I can't make an exception for you. What about my boss? I can try, just wait a minute.

Pause

"What happened?" - I ask curious, but already imagining the subject.

"A woman wants to make an urgent appointment, she needs an hour of your time today."

"But do we have more time today?"

"We do, but it depends on whether you want to stay late.

"Fine by me" - I shrug.

I didn't have much to do outside of here,my life was always the same,always monotonous,it was from work to home,from home to work,I didn't used to go out to have fun,so working a little more and earning some more money,wouldn't be a bad thing for me.

:Back to the link.

"Okay,she accepted that appointment,be here 4:30. Okay,you're welcome."

: End.

We went to lunch together and then back to work. After lunch I always came back refreshed,however some problems were still on my mind,talking made me less focused on them.

"How are the relationships going Lu?" - Curious question.

Thais was a great employee,always efficient and became a great friend,she had blonde hair with fine curls,her skin was pale like that of a vampire,she didn't like the sun very much,she was a younger woman than me and wanted me to follow her looser,extroverted,fun rhythm,I'm the most closed type of woman,I've always been like that,my mother says I'm old since I was born,because I've always been very serious,introverted.

"I don't have that,I don't want and in no way aim to have a loving relationship with anyone."

"Luma,we are getting older,we need someone to help us and give us the best in life." - He says in a dramatic tone.

"You are talking like my mother."

"She knows what is good." - I smile silly.

"Not for now Thaís,I want to focus on my career,my work..."

"That's always the excuse." - Says the same already cutting my speech about my to-do list.

We closed the subject since I didn't like to talk about these things, we arrived at the clinic, I attended to some more people until I got to the emergency room.

"Luma,they have arrived!" - Warns Thata.

"Have the people in charge write down what is happening and when they are done you bring the paper and the patient." - I give the order.

"All right."

She leaves and after almost 20 minutes she enters with a paper in her hands and a boy by her side,he wasn't so young,but he wasn't old either,he seemed to be one of those teenagers who live in a bad phase,the phase of rebellion,disrespect,lack of maturity and doing everything their friends tell them to do.

He was brunette,had low hair,lighter skin than mine and blue eyes.

"Good afternoon." - I smile to be nice.

"Good"- He says with a serious expression and a little annoyed.

"This is Diogo and here is what you asked me for." - Thaís hands me the paper and leaves.

I read it and there lies the cause of the urgency and the same is in front of me and it was everything I had already imagined.

"Everything okay Diogo?"

"Yes."

"Why are you here?"

"Because my parents decided to punish me because of some friendships."

"It's always them,the friendships." - I speak out loud.

"They are nice,my best friends and are people I can trust,but my parents don't like them."

"I wonder how nice they are and that is why they are not in their punishment as company and fellowship."

"They have no one to boss them around,they make their own choices...whereas I am forced to be here."

"They say they don't, do you really believe that?"

"Yes."

"Look, according to the list your mother filled out, you're having trouble at school, you're getting involved with people who don't help you grow up, and you're disobedient."

"And what about that?" - He says snidely.

"I thought you would deny it."

He stands still and stares at me.

"They just want you to get better, to do well, believe me, if you get better you won't need to come back here, but if you keep this up you'll have a lot of appointments."

"I don't need to change, my friends like me this way.

"Your parents want you to get better and I advise you to get better for your own good.

"They want too much and give nothing in return, I'm not obliged to follow rules."

"Okay. Well Diogo,I'll go over our appointment today,see you next time and think about what you were told today."

He leaves without saying anything,slams the door and so he leaves,I sigh,rebellious teenagers are the worst,they annoy me and tire me more than adults who don't know how to solve their own problems. After writing down a few things about his appointment,I pass everything on to Thais,she makes a note with his name,because we would be watching his evolution,then she talks to them and they leave,soon it was our turn as well.

When I get home I take a warm shower to relax,after the shower I dry off and put on some comfortable pajamas,make something quick and simple to eat,after I finish dinner I brush my teeth and go to sleep,I was so tired that I sleep without much effort.

Two weeks later:

Another day at work and always almost the same people,I kind of liked it,because we already created a bond,a friendship,something good and so it was better to work,more relaxed. Of course I don't confuse the work,nothing to put big feelings,because I am first of all professional.

"Good morning Aline,you may take a seat." - I smile at the sweet girl sitting in front of me.

"Good morning Luma." - She smiles kindly.

"What do you have for today, what shall we talk about?" - I ask looking at her fixed.

"My parents." - She says softly.

"What's wrong?" - I stare at his handsome face.

"They are trying to forget about my illness and they want me to forget about it too,but I need to be aware about what is going on,about the changes in my body,about my hair,about the surgeries..."

"You know they only do that so you don't suffer so much?"

"I know,but it bothers me,they don't ask me about what I want,what I think,how I feel,they have been treating me like a child and at the same time like a normal person,I need them to understand that I am fine and that I have already adapted to this new version of my life."

"Aline,you are a normal person!".

- I speak firmly "It's just that they think that these memories affect you,make you feel bad,not everyone feels good when remembering facts like what you have been living,I remember that it was very suddenly that you were given the diagnosis,taking everyone by surprise."

"Yes,but I would love to talk to them about it,I would love to tell them how I feel and what I think about everything that is happening."

"Then why don't you tell them?"

"I don't know,I don't want to spoil the happy look and joy they've been having these past few days,it bothers me,but I could stand to suffer to see them happy."

"If you don't tell them, you will be the one who will be unhappy, and that could affect the operation, recovery and treatment, don't let that happen, they will be much happier seeing you recovering well and getting better every day."

"Do you think I should really talk? - She asks fearfully and shaking her hands.

"Sure,if your problem is this talk everything to them,I think you will evolve better talking to them and not to me." - I say subtly,what I least wanted was to sound rude.

"What a lie, you graduated to solve other people's problems. - She gives a smug little smile.

"Yes, but I didn't graduate to see what's right and keep taking their money for nothing. So talk to them, tell them how you feel, tell them everything!"

"All right,I will try and next week I will tell you if I succeeded and how the conversation went."

"All right,kisses and see you next week."

"See you soon."

So she leaves and another patient comes in.

*_________ Minutes before __________*

Diogo:

I arrived at that boring clinic like every other time in the week I went,today I was stressed,my parents forced me to these futile sessions and thought this was the solution to their problems,but it's clear that I'm not the problem,but they are.

I sat down on one of the chairs in the waiting room,there was a pretty girl sitting there next to me,she was running her hand through her hair and had a happy look on her face,she seemed younger than me.

"Do your parents also punish you by sending you here?" - I ask staring at her.

"No." - She smiles sweetly "I come because I have cancer,the consultations and talks help me to better relieve my disease and morning problems."

"Gee... I'm really sorry,I..." - I speak embarrassed.

It was bad to say something normal and find out that the person has diseases,it gave a bad feeling,cut the good mood that was in the moment of the conversation.

"You can rest assured,I've gotten used to all this,it's not a problem to talk or comment about." - I smiled fluffily.

"Do you really think her boring talk helps you?" - I question looking at the door to the psychologist's office.

"For me yes,she gives me great advice and I can improve my life a lot by putting it into practice."

"I find my coming here so pointless." - I sigh tiredly.

"I thought so too,for me I was going to die anyway" - I swallow dryly. "But she taught me to enjoy today and let tomorrow come on its own,taught me to love more,to apologize for my mistakes and live well as if every day was my last,and I never lived like I do nowadays,well you know,I feel like a different person,I value everything around me,I love everything and everyone and that has made me happier,she has helped me to be and is happier."

A silence hung between us for a few seconds.

"What is your name?" - I ask to break the awkward silence.

"My name is..."

"Aline!,you can come in." - Says the secretary cutting her off.

"That's it." She says referring to her name.

She smiles and goes to the door,opens it and enters the room,stays inside for long minutes,after she leaves it's my turn and I was already tired and bored of that woman,before I even entered the room.

"Diogo!,you can come in!" - Speaks the secretary.

Aline walks past me and says, "Bye",all smiles and I enter the room with a closed face,as usual.

"Good afternoon." - Says the psychologist.

"Good."

"Anything new you'd like to share?" - She smiles sympathetically.

"No."

"Are you sure?" - He insists.

"I am." - I say rudely.

"What do you come here for, if you don't want to be helped, you don't even have to come." - His tone was normal, but I noticed a slight irritation in his voice.

"I come thanks, because I don't want to be here, I want to be with my friends.

"You don't even know what a friend is. - He speaks loudly and with his cheeks turning red.

"Yes, I do!"

"Friends are those who are with you all the time, in the good times and the bad, when you are broke and when you have plenty, when you need help, a hand or when you don't!"

"They always are!".

"Believe me, they're not."

"Why don't you take care of your life, which must be very fucked up, and leave me alone, I don't have to talk about my life to you or listen to your hunches.

"I don't want to take care of a spoiled child who thinks he knows everything, who thinks he has the right to yell, be rude and worse, use vulgar words with a professional in her workplace.

"And I don't want to listen to bullshit from an old woman who doesn't even know how to live,thinks she knows about everyone's lives,but I bet she doesn't do anything with her life,other than guessing about everyone's lives.'

"Enough!" - She shouts.

She dials a number and waits for them to answer.

"Traís,ask Lucas to remove Mr. Diogo from my room,because his session is already over."

Then a tall, strong man walks in, looks at me and I stand up, look at her and then leave, asking to have me removed was the biggest favor she ever did me, it kept me from being bored to death looking at her face.

"I thank you for getting me out of here,one less unpleasant company."

I say before leaving and then I leave. Finally free of this annoying woman.

A month went by and that boy didn't return,I felt relieved,I don't like people who don't want to but keep coming and still treat people who only want to help and work badly.

"Luma?" - Thaís knocks and puts her face to the door "Diogo wants to have an appointment with you."

"Didn't he give up?" - I speak discouraged.

"Apparently he needs to talk.

"Fine, but this will be the last time I make an exception for him!" - I say seriously.

"Yes, ma'am. May I send him in?"

"Yes."

She pulls the door open and then he comes in and sits in the chair facing me.

"Good afternoon." - He says fearfully.

"Good afternoon,hadn't you given up?"

"Yes,but you were right." - He speaks quietly.

"About what?"

"They weren't really my friends,I got arrested for pinching some walls and they fingered me,threw all the blame on me and left."

"Actually I almost never make a mistake." - I speak haughtily and exuding the inner peace of being right once again.

"You're happy, aren't you?" - He says seriously.

"Why?"

"Because I was a jerk to you and you just wanted to help me."

"Yes,but I don't like to see your disappointment...do you want to talk more about all this?"

"Yes."

"Then talk." - I smile sympathetically.

"I'm going to get better,go to college,graduate and give pride to my parents,I was really a little out of it and this beat brought me back to reality. I dedicated myself to friends and forgot about family,who was really on my side always. But I will do my best to change all that.

"I'm happy. And how do you plan all this?"

"I don't have much in mind no,but I want to change,I saw my mother crying because of me many times,for me treating her badly and being irresponsible always."

"That's mother's love,she advised you,gave you the best and showed you the right path,but you didn't follow,if you get better she will be proud of you,she probably already is,she's just a little sad or disappointed with the bad attitudes."

"True. I'm sorry." - He says so low I can hardly even hear his voice.

"What?"

"I'm sorry about that day?"

"Yeah kid, I don't even remember that anymore, be cool."

"Good, I felt bad after the whole episode."

"Yeah, me too."

"But okay, thanks for your strength and I'll come back and tell you all about it."

"Okay, I'll wait."

"See you later."

"See you soon."

He leaves my room all happy and I'm the same way,I've never seen a hardheaded person go back on what he said and I liked it,we've already achieved a small change in him.

My appointments are over and I was packing up everything to leave,but a hurricane named Thaís enters my room.

"Luma, shall we go to a nightclub that is opening?

"I don't think so.

"What do you think? Yes we are, you have to have fun.

"Thata, I'd better not, I'm too exhausted.

"Fine, I won't insist anymore, as usual."

"Okay, you can go have fun."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes,I'm fine." - I smiled sullenly.

I went to my house,as soon as I arrived I threw my things on the couch and went to take a nice cold shower and then lay down on the bed in a towel,just like that I blacked out,I was tired.

The rest of the months were just work,the boy came back as promised and told me everything,soon he no longer needed me and so I never saw him again. Aline had the surgery and everything went well, she was already free of cancer and said that she would never forget the lessons that I taught her, nor the opportunity that God gave her to redo everything that was wrong, and then I never saw her again either.

In the end Christmas came and I was getting ready to spend with my parents,Vicente was going to work and only New Year's would I go there.

*____________________________________*

At my parents' house:

"Hi Mom,Hi Dad." - I say as I arrive and already give kisses and hugs to both of them.

"Hi daughter,how are you?" - My father speaks kindly.

"Yes and with you?"

"We are well girl, how is the work?"

"Fine mom, in fact better than ever."

"And the boyfriends daughter?"

"Not for now."

"Luma,you need to date,give us grandchildren,you sound even like Vicente,you said you are too young to be attached to a woman and a child."

"I am waiting for the right time for each of these things."

I say smiling to reassure them,but the truth was that I wasn't thinking about any of that,I wasn't ready to jump headlong into a relationship let alone have a child.

"I think it's good not to delay,your father and I are old,we want to at least meet the grandchildren."

"Yes mom,yes dad,I will do my best."

We made the supper and invited the closest family friends,relatives etc.

Everyone asked me about my love life,children,Vincent,work,but none of that interested me,I wanted this to be over soon,I wanted to leave,I wanted to go to my home,not that I didn't like my parents,the problem is always the pressure that everyone put on me,normally here is a peaceful place,but when relatives and friends of my parents got together,everything was unbearable.

"All right daughter?"

"Yes..."

"What happened?"

"I'm tired of the same conversations mom, of everyone always asking the same things."

"My love, what good is money if you don't have a child, a child to enjoy?"

"Mom,I don't want to,it's not time yet,I haven't met the right person,I don't even know how to take care of someone other than myself."

"I understand,but know that this castle you build without anyone,will always be empty,uninhabited and painful,because we always need someone. We raised you with a lot of cost,you and your brother and we didn't stop being happy or having what to eat,we always had little,but we always had each other,we had you and love,I thank you for helping us and taking care of us,but don't think we are dependent,settled,we don't need money,we need you and see the family growing. I want to die knowing that you have good people by your side."

I hug her and cry on her shoulder,I remember the hardships and everything we went through,I remember my simple gifts,our joys and how they sweated to have a good study,I am truly grateful for everything they did for me.

"I love you mom,I love you,dad and bro,but this is not an obligation and you will never be a burden,you are the people I admire the most."

"We love you too daughter." - Says my dad as he comes closer and hugs us too.

"I love you my princess." - Says my mommy.