Staring at the white envelope in her hand with sad eyes, Rakia didn't dare to open it. Her heart sank when she entered her superior's room a few hours ago and received terrible news. The bus she was waiting for came; she turned her gaze towards the bus, then moved with Park steps onto the bus and sat by the window. She put the white envelope into a bag she slung over one shoulder. She tried to find topics for her to think about besides the bad news about her being laid off but to no avail. It still hurts even though she wasn't the only one laid off.
Hoping she could have a career as a journalist at the television station, but instead, she kicked her out. Her cell phone rang, distracting her for a moment from the sadness and disappointment she was experiencing.
"Yeah, Ben, what's wrong?" she asked with a slight smile. At least, when her fiancé called her, she still smiled a little amid sadness.
"I just want to say that tomorrow I will go to Brazil with the crew," said Benjamin.
"Brazil? Why suddenly?" That sounded odd to Rakia.
"My client wanted the location of his pre-wedding photo to be changed, and he chose Brazil." The silence between them.
"Honey, are you still there?" Benjamin said, removing the silence between them. Rakia nodded even though Ben didn't see her.
"Yes, I'm here. May I come with you?" Rakia asked doubtfully but hoped Ben would say yes.
"How is your work?"
Rakia looked down she rubbed the surface of her nail with the tip of her other nail. She bit her lips. "I... am no longer working," Rakia replied in a low voice.
"What does it mean? You stop?" Benjamin slightly raised his voice, making Rakia's ears irritated.
"The television station where I work has laid off some employees, including me." She tried to hold back her tears by biting her lip hard.
"So, can I come with you to Brazil?" Rakia repeated her request.
"Oh, Honey, I'm sorry about what you're going through, but I'm sorry I couldn't take you. Next time we will go on vacation together again.
Rakia nodded with a single tear rolling down her cheek.
"Yeah, no problem; sorry for trying to interrupt your work."
"No, Honey, see you later," Ben said, and their conversation ended. When Rakia lowered the cell phone from her ear, the tears she was trying to contain were unbearable. Even in her current situation, she expected Benjamin to comfort her. She knew her fiancé was busy with his job as a professional photographer. But Rakia needed someone to comfort her, cheer her up. She wiped away the tears starting to roll down her face. She will marry Benjamin in a week, but before that, she has to lose her job.
When the bus stopped at the first stop, Rakia chose to continue the journey even though she was stopping at this first stop. She wants to visit her best friend Lizzy's house. Arriving in front of the woman's house, Rakia pressed the bell; the homeowner opened the door at the first bell.
"Kia?! You...." Lizzy looked at her best friend inquisitively. Rakia could only smile.
"Why?" continued Lizzy, who originally wanted to ask directly.
"May I come in?" Rakia distracted Lizzy momentarily, and the woman lightly tapped her forehead, realizing her impoliteness. Rakia also followed Lizzy into the modest house. Rakia immediately sat on the fur rug in front of the television in the living room. She sat while leaning on the sofa facing the television and threw her bag on the sofa. Lizzy left Rakia to go to the kitchen to get a drink.
"Anything you want to say?" asked Lizzy as she came back from the kitchen and placed a tray on which were two cans of cola. Rakia stared at the cola can in front of her without blinking.
"I was laid off," said Rakia finally. Her chest tightened as she said that. Lizzy couldn't help but be surprised for a moment.
"But why?"
"I don't know either; they just said to reduce the number of employees." Rakia blinked, grabbed one of the cola cans, opened it, and took one gulp.
"Seriously? Do you still drink soda? You said you were going on a diet." Rakia changed the subject after she sipped her cola, and her face scrunched up. She honestly doesn't really like carbonated drinks, let alone alcohol. Lizzy chuckled.
"Only once in a while; after all, I managed to lose ten kilos," she said as she stood up and spun around gracefully, showing off her slender body. Rakia sighed as she smiled crookedly. Lizzy returned to her seat, grabbed a rather large rectangular pillow nearby, and put it on her lap.
"How's Ben? Does he already know this news?"
Rakia nodded.
"He's going to Brazil tomorrow. He said his client asked for a change of shooting location. I had offered to come along, but he refused."
"That's weird," Lizzy commented, which was immediately responded to by Rakia's sharp gaze.
"You guys always seem to be together, but come on, maybe you better stay out of work with him. You can stay here if you want."
Rakia smiled and was grateful for having an understanding friend like Lizzy.
"Your father and mother already know?" Lizzy got up to take the television remote and moved to sit next to Rakia.
"Not yet, but I'll tell them later; maybe I'll tell my father first." Rakia moved their soda tray to her other side so that she could stretch out her legs. Lizzy was busy selecting broadcasts.
"How are your wedding preparations going? Everything okay?" asked Lizzy changing the topic.
"Yeah, that's fine; we didn't invite many people, so there's no need for a lavish event. I'm going to the bridal tomorrow to pick up my wedding dress." Rakia got up from her seat, moved to the sofa, and lay down.
"At least there are still good things waiting for you in the future; you can find work again after marriage."
Rakia nodded even though Lizzy didn't see it.
"Are you sure you don't want to persuade Ben again to come to Brazil?" Lizzy teases Rakia into trying to get a proper diversion.
"Should I try again?" Rakia sounded unsure.
"Yeah, tell him you need a distraction from this sadness."
Rising from her lying position, Rakia took her cell phone from her bag and called Ben again. The man still needs to answer the first call. Then Rakia tried to contact him again, but he didn't answer. Then, Rakia sent a message to her fiancé to contact him. But Rakia felt uneasy that Ben didn't usually act like this; after three years of their togetherness Ben treated her like a queen; even Lizzy sometimes envied her because Ben seemed to monopolize her. Ben always has time for her, even during his busy schedule.
Rakia returned to lying down, but now she is busy surfing social media. She also tried to log into her fiancée's Instagram account. Still, she was shocked because she no longer had access to it. She tried to enter the password she knew all along but failed. Rakia moved to Ben's other social media as well. She doesn't have access to it. She also switched to her account and checked Ben's account through her account, and what happened was that she could not find her fiancé's account in her friend list. Rakia frowned, she called Ben again, but he didn't answer.
"Hey Liz, you're following Ben on Instagram, right?" she asked.
"Yes, why?"
"I can no longer access his account, and strangely he has disappeared from my friend list," Rakia admitted while still trying to contact Ben via WhatsApp or cellphone. Lizzy went to grab her cell phone, which was lying on the television table. Then she checked Ben's account on Instagram.
"I'm still friends with him, but it's weird; who is this hot woman?"
Lizzy's question distracted Rakia from her cell phone, and she looked over one of the woman's shoulders to see what she was asking. Rakia was increasingly confused, and negative thoughts immediately appeared. Several photos of the same woman wearing only a bikini are uploaded on Ben's account.
"Was the account hacked?" Rakia spat out her suspicions. Lizzy was silent for a while, continuing to examine the photos of the woman.
"Somebody uploaded the photos three days ago. It's possible that he was hacked, or... you don't suspect anything about his behavior lately?" Lizzy tilted her head slightly as she turned towards Rakia.
"No, he can't betray me; we will get married soon." Suddenly Rakia experienced a change of emotions. Lizzy chuckled.
"Hey, I'm just asking, don't panic like that," said Lizzy. Rakia tried to calm herself down.
"Try calling him and asking about this," Lizzy suggested then.
"Yes, but not appointed," Rakia said. Lizzy didn't say anything else because enjoy was in the film she was watching on television. At the same time, Rakia was still busy with her suspicions and assumptions, making her even more nervous.
The white wedding dress with a simple model but fantastic value perfectly wrapped Rakia's body. She looks like a fairy tale princess now. She smiled, seeing her reflection in the mirror wearing her wedding dress in the locker room where she ordered the dress.
"Liz, take a picture, please; I'll send Ben," Rakia asked, to which Lizzy smiled.
"It would be better if it were a surprise for her," said Lizzy, preparing to take a picture of Rakia on the woman's cell phone. Rakia posed as well as she could with several poses. After finishing, she sent the photos to Ben via WhatsApp. After trying it on, she removed the dress; the bridal staff who had accompanied her packed it neatly. Rakia asks Lizzy to take her to get the dress because Lizzy has a car.
"Have you tried calling Ben?" Lizzy asked as they were on their way home.
"Yes, this morning I called, but it didn't take long because he said he was taking a photo shoot." Rakia stared at the highway, which was quite congested by vehicles. Three days without work was like being in prison.
"Have you been looking for a new place to work again?" Lizzy asked again.
"Not yet, but I have plans to apply at Red One."
Lizzy frowned while still focusing on driving.
"Why there? Aren't you afraid of being mistaken for a spy? You're from his competitor's TV station. Don't you want to go with your father to National Geography?"
Rakia bit her lip, thinking. Lizzy's suggestion is okay, too, especially after she called.
Her father received an offer to join the adventure team.
"I want to, but later, I haven't talked to Ben about this either," Rakia decided. She doesn't want to make a unilateral decision because she can no longer make arbitrary decisions after she marries Ben.
"That's right, then you talk to Ben as soon as possible, but how come he looks like he's avoiding you like that?" Lizzy started with her speculation.
"You mean Ben?" Rakia confirmed. Lizzy nodded.
"You guys want to get married. It should be more intense, not like this, hard to contact; you don't fight, do you?" Lizzy glanced at Rakia briefly.
"We're fine, maybe just because he's busy. That's it; you have a habit of negative thinking that doesn't go away." Rakia pouted. Even Lizzy chuckled.
"Supposedly, I'm the journalist, right if you are suspicious of him? People can change quickly; the causes can be anything, from the cliché to the complex."
Folding her arms in front of her chest, Rakia thought about what Lizzy said, which she felt had some truth. Their conversation stopped when they stopped at a simple Padang restaurant for lunch. For some reason, Rakia felt uneasy on one side of herself. As a result, she had time to daydream, and Lizzy also reprimanded her.
"What if Ben betrays you?" asked Lizzy, suddenly looking at Rakia seriously. Rakia, who was drinking her orange juice using a plastic straw, looked at Lizzy in surprise. Then she shifted her gaze to her orange juice and smiled with a sigh.
"Why do you ask that?" Rakia curiously raised her gaze and looked back at Lizzy. The stares just shrugged.
"Just wanted to ask," Lizzy answered casually.
"If Ben betrays me, I will let it go even though it's hard for me to accept it, but I don't want to force him to be with me if he doesn't want to."
Lizzy smiled.
"Just kidding, don't sweat it. Go home now?"
Rakia agreed to the offer; she walked out first and waited near the car while leaning against the car body where she would sit later. He looked around the parking lot. His attention was caught by a shiny black Camry that had just entered the restaurant's parking lot. He stared at the luxury car and wondered about its owner. A man wearing a white polo shirt has muscles printed on his arms. Jeans with torn accents at the knees hang provocatively on her hips, straight with a towering posture. His slightly tanned skin adds a masculine impression. They exchanged glances when the man turned around after closing the car door. Rakia stared at the man, observing. Without Rakia expecting, the man approached her. Rakia felt uncomfortable when the man approached her, pretending to divert his attention toward the restaurant building.
"Don't look at a man that way," said the man matter-of-factly. The Caught Rakia couldn't help but stutter, and then she tried to control her nervousness and embarrassment. She turned to the stranger.
"I'm sorry to bother you, but I didn't mean anything," Rakia replied.
"Maybe you don't have any intention, but you can make a man fall in love just by looking at him; want to be my wife?"
Suddenly Rakia's eyes widened when she heard that ridiculous offer. The stranger laughed lightly.
"Just kidding, I hope we'll meet again," said the man before leaving the dumbfounded Rakia. His gaze didn't leave the man until Lizzy came near the car and caught his attention.
"What's the matter? Have you seen ghosts?" asked Lizzy, confused by Rakia's dumbfounded attitude. Instead of answering Rakia, she wanted to get into the car, but the car door was still locked; she looked at Lizzy and motioned with a glare to tell the woman to unlock it. She quickly got into the car and closed the door. Lizzy, who felt strange about Rakia's attitude, immediately followed the woman into the car.
"Are you seeing a real ghost?" Lizzy asked while starting the car engine, and then they left the parking lot.
"No, I just... meeting a strange guy. When he asked me to be his wife, it was like offering a peekaboo on the side of the road." Rakia opened her voice. Lizzie laughed.
"Handsome guy?" Lizzy was a little curious.
"Didn't you see when you were still inside? He was just in when you came out."
Lizzy thought for a moment, and then her lips formed an O.
"Who's that hot guy? Did he say that to you? Why don't you accept it while your wedding dress is ready? Lizzy chuckled at his joke. Rakia glanced at him.
"What's wrong with you? If you want it, you can have it."
"Really? He's handsome. It's rare to find a handsome guy like him on earth +62, most are Caucasians too, and even that's not so so," Lizzy said.
"Then what will Ben do?"
"Yeah, just throw it away; he's about to expire; don't you ask for his cellphone number? Whatsapp, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter?"
Rakia wore a dramatic expression of disgust.
"Look, when it comes to guys, there's no brake. Besides, I was looking at it when he just arrived. Yeah, it steals attention because he's wearing a Camry that's so sleek."
Lizzy chuckled as she shook her head.
"You're not being polite, are you?! Usually yes. If you stare at a strange boy, he will think that it's a signal from you to him."
"Is that so?" Rakia looked stupid. Lizzy rolled her eyes.
"Yes, yes," Lizzy snapped quickly.
"I just stared at him because he just arrived because his car stole the attention," defended Rakia, who disagreed with Lizzy's argument.
"Yeah, right; the meaning of people's gazes varies depending on the moment; it was just an ordinary moment. I'm a foreigner who finished eating at the shop, and he's a stranger who stopped by to eat at the shop," Rakia added. Lizzy snorted.
"Ask Ben about this later. He must be thinking the same as I am." Lizzy ended the little debate between them. Rakia is momentarily distracted by Ben. She also chose not to debate Lizzy further and diverted his activities and thoughts to social media.
"Liz, can I borrow your account? Want to peek at Ben." Rakia asked while grabbing Lizzy's cell phone on the dashboard. As he checked his fiancée's Instagram account, he was back, assaulted by bewilderment. There is a photo showing his fiancé wearing a white suit, he looks like a groom at a wedding, and a woman beside him is seen wearing a wedding dress; they smile at the camera and embrace each other tenderly. The photo is set in a sea view. Rakia's heart pounded uncomfortably as she swallowed her saliva a few times.
"Liz," she called without looking at Lizzy, her eyes focused on the cellphone screen. Lizzy looked up momentarily and was again confused to see the expression her best friend had shown a few moments ago in front of the restaurant repeating itself.
"Why? Seeing ghosts on Instagram again?"
Those who were asked were silent. She was still focused on checking her fiancé's porch the last few days, but there was nothing strange until the photo of a woman Lizzy found a few days ago. Rakia also read the caption listed on the photo she had just seen.
We are so blessed with this married.
After her fifth call with no answer from her fiancé, the frustration Rakia felt started to reach its maximum. She squeezed her phone like she was going to crush it. She was furious with Ben, who never answered her phone and replied to her messages; she wanted to ask the man to explain the photo she found yesterday on one of the man's social media. Lizzy opened the door to the room currently occupied by Rakia. Since yesterday she has asked her poor friend to move into her house and live temporarily until she legally becomes someone else's wife.
"Why? Have you managed to call Ben yet?" asked Lizzy in the doorway, her hand still perched on the hinge. Rakia shook her head in frustration. She brushed her hair in a state she bowed deeply. Lizzy joined her, sitting on the edge of the bed.
"Want me to contact him?" Lizzy offered, suddenly making Rakia raise her head and stare at Lizzy while nodding. She was ready to cry but managed to hold it in by biting her lip. Just as Lizzy was about to move to pick up her cell phone, Rakia's cell phone rang an unfamiliar number. Rakia quickly picked it up and hoped it was Ben.
"Yes, Hello," said Rakia.
"Hello, good night, right with Miss Rakia Adeline?"
"Yeah, right. Who am I talking to?"
"We, from the wedding organizer planning to handle your wedding, would like to confirm that Mr Benjamin Hudson has cancelled working with us; he asked us to confirm this to you."
It was as if her world just collapsed at that moment. Rakia could only remain silent with a tense face.
"Thank you for your time, and good night."
The conversation ended without Rakia responding to the caller's farewell greeting.
"Hey, what's wrong?" Lizzy was confused when her best friend suddenly turned into a stone statue.
"Ben..." Rakia seemed to have lost half of her life now. Lizzy waited with confusion and curiosity. Then Rakia's tears broke out; she covered her face and collapsed onto Lizzy's shoulder.
"Hey! What's wrong with you? Why? Accident?" Asked Lizzy with questions.
"Ben cancelled our wedding," Rakia said between her tears.
"What?" Lizzy said that in a half-whispered voice and couldn't believe it.
"Son of a bitch!" Lizzy cursed then. She hugged her and tried to calm her down. Rakia can only cry while her mind remembers Ben's recent treatment. Starting with the man telling her he was going to Brazil suddenly, the communication slowly diminished until he finally got dumped. Rakia got up from Lizzy's shoulder with a face wet with tears. She stared at her hands, whose fingers she twisted with slow and nervous movements.
"I'll leave you alone," said Lizzy, who tried to give space to Rakia to calm down. Before Lizzy left, Rakia quickly caught one of the woman's hands.
"No, you stay here. I get sadder when I'm alone." Rakia lifted her face, wiped her tears with her other hand, and tried to stop her sobs. Her heart was in a lot of pain right now; maybe if it were in the form of a human, it would look battered because it was hit here and there.
"I thought Ben was a man who would accompany me to spend the rest of my life in this world; after all we've been through, he managed to convince me that he is a man who keeps his promises, but the reality is not so," Rakia spoke after she regained her composure. Her eyes were moist.
"Am I to blame for this bad fate? Am I the reason Ben left, chose another woman, and had the heart to do this hurtful thing to me?" The question seemed to add to his heartache, and she wanted to cry again, but she tried to hold it back.
"People change for various reasons; Ben must have a reason why he did this cruel thing; regardless of whether it's a good or bad deed, there must be a reason behind why someone did it." Lizzy took Rakia's hand and held it.
"You don't need to blame yourself first; I'll try to call Ben to ask him to contact you," Lizzy continued. Rakia lifted her face and looked up at the ceiling to drive away the tears in her eyes; a few drops managed to spill down her face. She inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly. Although it can only slightly reduce the shaky scales, it is worth a try. Rakia turned to look at Lizzy.
"If he calls me later, I will say goodbye to him; even if he doesn't tell me the reason for doing this, I won't insist; sometimes painful things don't need to be known."
Lizzy smiled sadly, seeing her best friend trying to be strong in accepting this bitter reality. She knew her wound wouldn't heal any time soon. Being dumped while still being sad is a heavy blow.
"Sleep, you need rest." Lizzy caressed Rakia's hair before leaving her best friend.
"Hey, can I have some cheesecake in the fridge?" asked Rakia intending to ask permission to eat her friend's favourite cake. Lizzy smiled and nodded.
"You need energy to be sad," she said, to which Rakia responded with an expression between sad and happy. She followed Lizzy out of the room before the woman closed the door. Opening the refrigerator, Rakia looked at the cheesecake with a triangular piece that was quite large. She can't wait to eat the cake; it must refresh her dry mouth and throat after crying. She left the kitchen with a plate of cake in her hand. As she passed Lizzy's study, she stopped, turned towards the room, and opened the door. She stared at her wedding dress hanging on a hanger, still wrapped in grey plastic; only the bottom tassel was visible. Rakia stepped deeper into the dress; she put the cake she brought on Lizzy's work table and took the dress from its place. Suddenly an idea crossed her mind about the dress. She grabbed the cake she had kept on the table and walked into the backyard, which was not so wide but very neatly arranged by Lizzy. Her friend has expertise in managing plants but prefers a career as a web designer. Her talent for caring for plants has been seen since they were still in high school. And during that time, they formed a friendship. She had different majors in college, but Rakia didn't use that as an excuse to reduce her communication with Lizzy. So did Lizzy, who finally agreed to board at the same place.
Rakia opened the backyard door through the small kitchen. The moonlight was bright tonight, and the two garden lights provided ample light. Lizzy secured her cake on the dining table and returned inside the house to retrieve the coat hanger where she had placed the dress. Then Rakia placed the dress in the middle of the backyard which was already hanging in place.
"What are you doing?" Lizzy came when Rakia was just about to enter the kitchen.
"I'm going to put on a show; want to watch me?" Rakia looked at Lizzy enthusiastically, who looked even more confused. Rakia passed Lizzy into the kitchen and onto the room she had in this house to get her cell phone, stopped briefly in the kitchen to get lighter and returned to the backyard. Lizzy stood waiting on the little porch that separated the backyard from the back of the kitchen. Rakia opened her social media and the camera to start the live broadcast. She trotted over to Lizzy.
"You're the cameraman for tonight's show," Rakia said, handing over her cell phone.
"When I say start, start the live broadcast," Rakia instructed as she stood by her wedding dress. Lizzy nodded and gave a thumbs-up. Rakia got ready and thought about what she would say on the live broadcast this time. Her experience as a journalist makes it easy for her to face the camera.
"Move forward a bit, Liz; it's too far out there not to see me." Rakia gave a suggestion. Lizzy complied and stepped into the backyard area with neat synthetic grass. Rakia motioned for Lizzy to stop after feeling her position was perfect for taking her picture. Then Rakia was called to start recording. She was intelligent at stringing words with the proper expression even though her eyes were puffy, but she didn't care. Lizzy enjoyed her best friend babbling through the cellphone screen. As Rakia was about to start the actual show, Lizzy was wide-eyed when Rakia crouched near one hem of her dress, lit a lighter and started burning the hem. The fire slowly grew, engulfed the dress below, and spread to the top.
"Enjoy the show!" closed Rakia before disappearing from the camera's glare. She joined Lizzy's side to watch the dress burn through her cellphone screen. Some comments from people who watched the live broadcast began to appear. Within minutes, the number of viewers for the live broadcast increased, and comments from netizens continued to appear. Rakia felt that something was missing from the show until she got up to take a chair and her cheesecake which had been forgotten. She dragged a chair and put it within reach of her cellphone camera, then sat there and watched the dress burn while enjoying a large piece of refreshing cold cheesecake.