Once The Alpha's Little Secret, Now His Greatest Regret

Author's Note

A few months ago, I struggled to write and get my words onto a page. English isn't my first language, and to be honest, I've never considered my vocabulary particularly strong.

Then something unexpected happened.

The characters in this book suddenly seemed to come alive in my head. Their words, conversations, fears, pasts, dreams, and emotions felt real. Writing this story stopped feeling like putting words together and started feeling like living alongside them. Through that experience, this world slowly came alive.

I have one hope for you, my readers:

Don't just read this story as a collection of words on a page. Live it. Step into the world of these characters, feel what they feel, hurt when they hurt, and celebrate when they find happiness. If you do, then hopefully you'll experience the same thing I did while writing this story-the feeling of being completely immersed and alive within another world.

Thank you for giving this story a chance.

- Deeyah Writes

Content Warning

This story contains mature themes, including violence, emotional trauma, abuse, discrimination, war, grief, sexual content, and other sensitive topics that may not be suitable for all readers.

For readers who prefer to avoid explicit intimate scenes, chapters containing mature sexual content will be clearly marked with [R18] warnings beforehand. Reader discretion is advised, especially for readers under the age of 18.

I've also made an effort to ensure that these scenes can be skipped without causing you to miss any major plot developments or important story moments.

With that said, welcome to Rozaria.

I hope you enjoy living this journey through the eyes of its characters. 🌚🤧

This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to real persons, places, or events is purely coincidental.

Chapter 1: He's Back?

Ever's POV

"All Omegas to their stations, Alpha Hagan has returned" The matrons rang the bell to alert everyone in the chambers.

The cloth I had been using to wipe the windows fell from my hands at the sound of the announcement.

He was back? A rush of excitement shot through me. It'd been a month since he left for his most recent pack visit. And I'd yearned every night for his return. I dusted my wet hands on my clothes and loosened my brown hair, fixing it as best as I could. I couldn't let him see me looking a mess after a whole month of being apart.

"Did you hear? The Alpha's back" Kia's voice called from behind.

"And?..." I raised a brow.

"Yeah. Like you haven't been dreaming of him this whole past month." She scoffed. "I miss you Hagan. When will you return, Hagan. I can't bear it when we're apart" She mimicked and I threw my shoes at her which she dodged and ran down the stairs with me chasing after her.

Kia and I grew up in GreyMark's orphanage for Omegas. She was the only one I got along with as other pups there felt I was either too stubborn or too much trouble to be entangled with.

She was also the only one I'd told that I was mated to the Alpha. And best of all, She was my best friend, my roommate, and one of only two things in this Pack that truly mattered to me..

The other was Hagan. And he was finally back after being away for so long.

Kia and I scurried past our stations.

"Where are you going?" She whispered, holding me back. "We're supposed to be at our stations.

"I have to see him" I whispered back. "It won't take too long I promise, just a minute"

She groaned. "For the love of God. That's what you always say. And a minute turns to 10 minutes"

I gave her my famous saddening look. Which 99% of the time worked on her. The 1% not working being whenever she had just been punished when I was actually at fault.

"Not this time, Ever. We could get caught. And you know what those matrons do to us whenever we're caught wandering outside our stations without permission" She whispered, not willing to budge.

"Then I'll go myself" I yanked my hand out of hers and slid past the passageway to the street. Kia joined me moments later, panting heavily as she caught up to me.

"You'll be the death of me one day" She let out and we both laughed as we increased our pace to avoid being spotted.

We ran across the main yard and eventually got to the crowd awaiting the Alpha's entrance. Warriors, Gammas, Elders and many beautiful highborn shewolves were eagerly waiting.

Omegas like us were strictly not allowed to attend gatherings like this so Kia and I had to cover up our crescent marks. It would be easy to tell with how faded they were that we were Omegas so we hid it as we slid past the crowd.

Some wolves we passed still managed to figure out we were Omegas - through our weak scents and our dirty clothes of course. And it made passing through harder as many of them shoved us out of their way.

We eventually managed to make it to the midst of the crowd. Kia and I put our veils on to avoid being recognized.

I searched for Hagan's carriage among the many carriages that moved past. I wasn't the only one searching apparently as many Highborn shewolves shoved each other just to get a sight at him.

They were causing serious commotions for the rest at the back as each with their own comments started one argument or the other.

"I can't believe our Alpha still doesn't have a mate. Any shewolf would be willing to assume the role of his mate if only he just asked" One began, frustration clear in her tone.

"And what makes you think even he asked, he'd ask you of all people. Your father is literally a retired nobody. Your family lacks the status suitable for a Luna" Another pressed and they both got into a fight, pulling each other's hairs.

"Oh what I'd give just to have a night in those arms. Having those eyes staring down at me" Another began.

"Slut! That's why you still don't have a mate and yet you're pregnant"

And that didn't end well either. Kia and I decided to move further aside from them before we'd get caught in their drama.

The carriages finally halted at the Pack house where the Beta alighted first and the crowd went into a frenzy. The shewolves especially.

Beta Roy was as good looking as one could picture. His green eyes suited his short black hair so well and when he wasn't standing close to the Alpha, he was one of those extremely good looking men ladies could barely take their eyes off.

I looked over at Kia. She had unfortunately fallen into the frenzy too.

"Well someone's gaping..." I teased.

She jerked back into composure as she tried to hide the astonishment in her eyes.

"I wasn't," she quickly defended. "And didn't you say a minute. I reckon it's been up to five minutes since we left"

"Pretty please, just three more minutes" I pleaded with her as she rolled her eyes.

"Fine. We leave after we see your prince charming" She teased back and I shot her a glare.

A tall masculine figure alighted the last carriage. And the crowd went crazy, with whistles and chants erupting everywhere. The ladies completely lost their composure as some began screaming for his attention.

I couldn't see him clearly as many people had stepped in front of me and blocked my view but I didn't need anyone to tell me who was causing these commotions.

I struggled to slide past the crowd in front of me to get a better view. And I eventually found a block to climb on.

My eyes didn't need to search for two long before it found him. There he was. Greymark's Alpha and proudly...My mate. Even if no one knew. I clutched my chest, unable to hold back my smiles. One month away and he still managed to look more beautiful than ever. His broad shoulders and imposing frame made him impossible to miss, even among the warriors surrounding him.

For a moment, he turned to where I was and we locked eyes. To others there, it would seem like a basic glance through the crowd but we both knew. He looked away as fast as we had locked gazes, for it not to arouse suspicion in the minds of the Pack members.

"It's been a whole extra five minutes, Ever" Kia whispered, pulling me down. "We should get going," She said, pointing towards two of the matrons who seemed to be looking for us as their eyes searched the crowd frantically.

"Presenting to you, Greymark's Alpha" Beta Roy's voice rang out and I turned back again as he surprisingly continued "And..."

"Did the Alpha bring someone with him?" One of the highborn females let out, curiously.

My eyes caught sight of the figure whose hand reached out of the carriage.

I watched, puzzled as a tall, elegant female beauty stepped out of the same carriage Hagan had just stepped out of.

Her presence commanded so much respect and you could feel it even from a distance that her wolf was a strong one. From how prominent her crescent mark was - She was definitely a highborn. But who was she to Hagan?

My stomach tightened.

No. No, no, no.

"His Luna" Beta Roy finished. Those two words pierced me like two stone daggers were driven right into me. The crowd went into a frenzy as gasps and murmurs flew around.

"It can't be," I let out an almost silent murmur, my gaze falling back to Hagan.

"She's his mate? I still think I would've been a better pick but damn they look so good together" One of the highborns let out.

I searched Hagan's eyes for some sort of answer to whatever this was but his eyes didn't seem to deny what Beta Roy had just said. He stretched out his hand to her and she took it smiling and as they turned, his gaze fell back to me, cold and distant in a way I couldn't explain.

I didn't see what happened next as Kia forcefully pulled me out of the crowd.

"I told you we shouldn't have come" She let out, her voice drenched in panic.

The matrons were getting closer to where we were and she was trying hard to avoid being seen by them. I could barely walk properly or register how much trouble we both were in as my mind still dabbled in the words Beta Roy called out so casually "His Luna". I'd spent three years picturing myself in a moment exactly like that where I'd stand beside him to bear that title. And he...

"What is an omega doing here?" One of the warriors Kia had hid behind screeched as he pushed her aside, snapping me back to reality. I snapped out of my head and tried to help her up but someone else shoved me to the ground.

The matrons had heard the commotion and rushed to where we were. Kia's eyes threw daggers at me as they closed in on us and eventually spotted us, shooting us displeased looks.

Ever's POV

"This is the third time this year we're catching you both out of your stations...without permission" The senior Matron let out, her voice full of frustration as she wrote our names down again in the black list.

If I were given a shekel for everytime my name had entered that list, I'd be richer than many merchants in the pack.

"It seems we haven't been punishing you both properly" She let out. "I don't think cleaning the outer pack house is enough punishment for two meatheads who never obey instructions" she lashed out.

"For the whole of this week, while the other omegas sleep. You both will tend the horses and keep their stables clean" She wrote down.

Kia and I glanced at each other, relieved.

"And..." She continued as we both jerked back in anticipation. "I'll be cutting short your daily rations. One ration a day and that will only be mid-day when you're done with cleaning the royal pack houses" She penned again.

"Luna is also going to be needing extra assistance getting to know the Pack and she must be comfortable. At all costs. You both will be part of those making sure her chambers are as comfortable as possible. And if you cause any more troubles..." The matrons who had captured us glared at us.

"You'll be facing the elders directly and be permanently ousted from this pack. Or better still, evicted to the Harem" she let out, making sure her word sank in. And it did.

She eventually dismissed us and the matrons led us out. We were instructed on how to tend to the "Luna" and make sure everything was at her beck and call.

First, Hagan brings back this mysterious woman after being away for a whole month, then calls her his Luna before everyone in the Pack and now... I'm being made to serve her. God help me when I finally see him. I was going to bombard him with questions. Because why would he do this? Without even giving a thought about how I'd feel about it.

Three years we'd been together and now he wants me to be fine with calling another woman, his Luna?

I snapped out of my thoughts as we finally arrived at her chambers. Speak of the devil and she appears.

There she was again - wearing that same flawless smile she had on her earlier, which for some reason, always made me cringe on her behalf.

"These are your servants Luna" the Matron spoke first, introducing us. "Just let them know whenever you need anything" She told her. "And if any of them cause you any trouble" Her gaze shifted to Kia and I specifically. "Just let me know"

"That's fine, thank you. I'll take it from here" She responded. Even her voice was elegant. I couldn't hide how much something tightened painfully in my chest anytime I remembered Hagan reaching his hand out to her. Could he really have chosen a mate for himself? Did our mate bond no longer matter to him? He had a lot of answering to do when we eventually met.

"So..." She let out when the Matron left. "I'm Rhaeya." She smiled. "And you all look terrified." She let out a soft laugh and I found her sweetness very fake as many highborns hated Omegas, especially females. I knew she'd reveal her true self soon. It was just a matter of time.

The other omegas, excluding Kia and myself however, seemed to have fallen for her charade.

"We're at your service, Luna" We all kneeled and said in unison. I forced the words 'Luna' down my throat.

"No, no... You don't have to kneel when we're alone. I particularly find that exhausting" She ushered us up.

"But you're..." One of the Omegas spoke as we were all dumbfounded, myself included.

"Luna, I know. But there are better things we could do than you spending time kneeling at my feet" She chuckled. I could swear I almost heard a maniacal laughter break out. Like she had something suspicious planned out. She'd make us believe she was sweet, only to torture us later when we got very comfortable.

We helped her prepare a bath as she requested and helped her take her garment off when she was ready to get in. She was as beautiful as you could imagine. Her blonde hair slid down her hourglass frame as her body slid into the water.

We spread ourselves out. Different people focused on different parts of her body. I was the one massaging her hair while Kia was one of the Omegas tending to her feet.

I couldn't help but glance over her body. I wondered if she and Hagan had ever had anything intimate to do with each other. The thought alone broke me and I really hoped I was wrong.

"So..." She began again when the silence became exhausting. "As you know, I'm not from your Pack. My father's Alpha of Stonestorm, east of Rozaria" She let out, like we were supposed to applaud her for being an Alpha's daughter.

If there was anything Omegas hated more than Matrons, it was Highborns - females to be exact. This one might seem different for the meanwhile but I'm sure I wasn't the only one who believed she had something playing under her sleeves.

"Why don't you tell me more about your pack..." She insisted. "And your Alpha" My fingers tightened before I forced them to relax but it was too late as my thumbs mistakenly pressed down too hard on her forehead. She winced in pain and turned to stare at me.

Kia gestured to me to apologize immediately.

"I'm...I'm sorry Luna" I knelt. "It was a mistake"

The other Omegas glared at me, furious.

"Here's a painkiller, Luna. Let me dab that for you" one of them requested.

"It's fine" She let out a nervous laugh. "It's just a bump, nothing too serious" she said as she turned to me. "What's your name?"

I lifted my gaze to hers trying to read the mischief hiding behind those emerald green orbs.

"Ever, Luna" I answered back.

"Ever, well I think you may need to go slower" she said. "I have a pretty steep forehead" she giggled and they burst out laughing.

"Now where were we, your Pack..." She laid back down like nothing happened.

Maybe she wasn't as bad as I thought, I told myself. But that didn't change the fact that Hagan had everyone believing she was his mate. It wasn't just something I could brush off and act like it didn't happen. Especially when I knew who his true mate was.

The other omegas quickly got super comfortable as they began telling her most of what they knew about the Pack, the Alpha and how things weren't as different in Greymark than it was in other Packs in Rozaria.

"I'm glad we get to have someone like you as Luna" One of them spoke. "The Alpha lucked out on a mate like you" She said, all smiles.

Rhaeya blushed at the compliment.

"And you, do you all have mates too?"

She asked, genuinely curious.

We lowered our gazes, not knowing how to answer.

It seemed she barely knew much of how Omegas were treated in Rozaria.

"Omegas like us aren't usually accepted by our mates" I found myself answering her before I could stop myself. "We're seen as shameful, unworthy or dirt, both to the pack members and to our mates" I found the courage to finish. My mind went back to the night when Hagan and I found out we were mates. I may have agreed to keep it secret but that didn't mean it didn't hurt that he tried his possible best to hide the fact that we were mates.

And for three years I played along.

A knock interrupted our girls' talk shortly after.

"Rhaeya?" Hagan's thick voice tore through. "We need to talk" He let out, his tone, more serious than ever.

And as fate would have it, Rhaeya gestured to me to let him in.

Ever's POV

I wasted some time before I eventually stood up. The others helped her get dressed while I headed towards the door in anticipation.

I bit my lower lip, not knowing how to act as I got closer to the door. My heart raced against my chest as I pulled the handle, revealing him standing there.

A mix of emotions swept through me. I wanted to scream at him, hug him and kick him all at the same time but I forced myself to stay composed.

His eyes rested on mine for a while. They held a mix of emotions like mine. He reached his hand into his pocket and slid a note into my hand.

"Hagan?" Rhaeya called out from behind and interrupted whatever was going on between the both of us.

Hagan's cold demeanor returned. He walked past me like I wasn't even there to begin with.

Kia extended an "are you okay" gaze to me and I replied with a subtle nod and pursed my lips trying to hide my unease.

"Okay girls, we'll continue this later" she dismissed us.

I left with the rest, trying to settle how uneasy I felt seeing them both this close together. In Rhaeya's chambers at that. I felt Hagan's gaze on me as I left before he turned to talk to Rhaeya.

"How're you enjoying your stay here?" Was the only thing I had heard him say and after that I could barely hear what they were saying as muffled voices followed behind the shut doors.

"Sorry you have to go through this..." Kia's voice let out from behind me.

"We should get going to the stables" I brushed it off, holding the note Hagan had given to me tighter.

"Yeah we should," Kia agreed.

I paused on our way there to read what was on the note.

"Meet me at the lake tonight.

I miss you.

-Hagan."

Happy tears filled my eyes to the brim.

"That fool" I wiped them off before they became more noticeable. "He has a lot of explaining to do" I told myself as I slid the note into my worn-out shoes.

Kia and I took our mid day rations and headed to the stables after eating.

"You blind Omega." A highborn shewolf let out, frustrated at the young omega kneeling at her feet. "It's already enough that your kind is loafing off our pack. Still, you have to ruin other people's day with your rotten luck" She yelled more and attracted attention from other passers-by.

I clenched my fists furiously as memories of when I used to be treated like this all the time when Kia and I were still little and in the orphanage home, came flooding back. I was too weak to stand up for myself back then but I won't let someone else go through the same while I just stood and watched.

I attempted to confront the highborn but Kia held me back, shaking her head in disagreement.

"Not now, Ever." She told me. "You'll get both us and that poor girl in trouble"

"She's already in as much trouble as she can be. And if no one does anything, it'll get worse for her" I replied and Kia dropped my arms in surrender.

"Where's your Matron?" The highborn kicked the girl who was still on the floor. "Answer me" She raised her hands to hit her when I stepped in and held it back.

Gasps and murmurs flew around us following what I had done.

My anger had now hit its brim. I knew I'd never win a combat with this shewolf - her wolf was strong, even as puny as its host was but I wasn't going to turn a blind eye either.

She turned to me, her anger now fixated on me. I let go of her hand and hurriedly helped the shaky girl to her fit. She reminded me of young me - bones very visible and her scrawny little figure. The only difference was she didn't have as many scars as I did, each set I got every time I got into trouble with the Matrons. And I always did. She looked at me visibly scared.

"Go" I told the girl. "Go back home," I urged her.

"Did I say she could leave?" The lady puffed. I gestured to the girl who had fear written all over her to leave. She hesitated before picking up her pouch on the floor and running.

The lady crossed the distance between myself and her and choked me tightly. I winced in pain, struggling to get out of her grasp. "Seems you like to play the hero, don't you?" She tightened her grip as I began grasping for air pathetically. Her claws shot out as her eyes turned a deep amber.

"So you're all talk, no action, aren't you?" She said, shoving me to the floor. I let out a choked cough, trying to breathe well. It felt like she had squeezed all the air out of me. I could feel the claw marks she had left very fresh on my neck.

My eyes searched frantically for Kia but she was nowhere to be found. Well she had warned me. But as usual, I didn't listen.

She crossed the distance between us once again and choked me more fiercely this time. People just stood by and watched without intervening. This was it, the life of an Omega. You could be choked out, raped, stoned to death for all the world cared. It was all the same to them - our deaths meant a great favour to Pack.

"Leave her" Rhaeya's voice rang out from the courtyard as people turned to where her voice was coming from, including the female who was choking me.

"That's the Luna" Whispers and murmurs began. "She's even more beautiful than the rumors tell" More followed.

"I said...leave her" Rhaeya repeated, now losing the calm her first order had.

Right beside her was a panting Kia. Did Kia go to call her? What? Why? Why her of all people.

I felt the grip on my neck drop as I fell to the floor, trying to find my breath.

Kia ran to help me up.

"But Luna, you can't possibly be protecting her. She's an Omega and she...she insulted me. Everyone here saw it" She tried explaining.

"I'm sorry for the trouble she must have caused you. She's my servant. I'll decide how she should be punished" Rhaeya apologized and I became furious.

"I didn't do anything. You were assaulting that poor girl for a reason I'm very sure is minor and negligible. Yet you chose to make her suffer for whatever insecurity it is you're too cowardly to lash out on someone your own size" The words slipped out faster than I could think twice.

Rhaeya facepalmed hard.

"What did you just say to me?" The lady furiously approached again and this time Kia stepped in front of me.

"I apologize for how she's behaved. She's been very stressed lately. I promise I'll keep her in check" She said and pulled me away.

"You better do" The lady replied behind us as she left. The crowd eventually dissipated after her.

Kia dragged me out of the courtyard.

"Thanks for intervening Luna" she thanked Rhaeya and gestured to me to do the same.

"I'm sorry for causing you trouble, Luna" I reluctantly let out. "I'll accept any punishment you give me" A familiar ache settled in my stomach every time I called her Luna and now subjecting myself to being punished by her made the ache worsen.

"Well then" Her elegant voice which irritated me so much let out. "You'll be part of those touring me around the Pack house." She smiled."You and your friend." She beamed at Kia who I could swear was lost for words at her offer of punishment.

"It would be my honor, Luna," Kia instantly replied, bowing. Rhaeya looked to me for my response. I tried hard to find one but couldn't.

"She'll be happy to, Luna" Kia nervously replied on my account.

"Great...I'll see you girls tomorrow then" She smiled and left.

I turned to glare at Kia.

"What? She was the best option I could think of"

"I know, it's just..."

"Yeah I understand." Kia placed a hand on my shoulder. "Well let's get going, those horses won't feed themselves" she tried to lighten my mood. I forced up a smile.

Fortunately, we got to the stables just in time. And finished up at midnight.

"And that's the last horse" Kia pushed a dark stallion into his stable.

"Kia?" I asked her.

"Hmmm?" She turned to me.

"Do you like Rhaeya?" I asked her. That was too stupid a question, even I myself knew. What was there not to like about her.

"Well, if she's going to be the reason my best friend is always sad... I don't" She let out and I smiled.

"Do you think the Alpha really likes her?" I asked. Why was I even asking her these questions? Kia wasn't Hagan. How was she supposed to know?

"I don't know that...but I do know any man would be a fool to choose someone else over you. That includes him, "she said.

"Why not talk to him and find out for yourself" she urged.

"I think I will," I told her. "And thank you" I beamed at her.

"Of course, what would you do without me? Every pen needs paper. You're my pen, messy and unfiltered. And I'm your paper" She let out and we both laughed. What an awkward way to describe us.

"So should we get going, it's pretty late" She asked, preparing to leave.

"You, go on without me, I have someone to meet" A blush crept up my cheeks.

"Ooh, we're back to the late night meetings, are we?" She teased.

"No it's not like that" I tried to hide how red my cheeks were.

"Well, I'll be in our room when you get back." She told me before retiring back to the pack house.

The lake had been Hagan and my secret meeting place for many years. The only place besides his chambers where we got to actually talk. I made for it, my heart subtly beating in my chest. The moonlight was bright enough to see where I was going but not enough to see clearly.

When I got there, my eyes caught sight of his silhouette on the other side of the lake as the rhythm in my chest got louder.

"Hagan?" I whispered. The figure took slow strides to where I was and enclosed me in a tight hug, its familiar Sandalwood scent hit me before I could even respond.

"I've missed you, Ever"