'My Ruthless Husband

CHAPTER 1

I am Mrs. Jade Naive Guaren-Sevara, well I had a perfect married life back then, I don't know where or when it started but this is really what happened.

We're high school lovers, well it's funny to think that we're on and off but we still fail at church.

after a years I got pregnant, maybe we were married for three years before I got pregnant, he's the happiest man I know when I told him I was pregnant.

We are here in the garden today while watching the flowers planted by his parents, it feels good.

He hugged me from behind while his head is resting in my arms, I pinched his hand that's why he slightly opened his eyes.

"Why?" He asked before sitting me down on the swing and swinging me there.

I am 4 months pregnant.

"Love, what gender do you want our baby to be?" I curiously asked, he just continued cradling me while thinking of what to answer.

"Hmm, if you ask me. I want a man." I smiled at him after he said his answer, same as mine.

"Well, what will you name it?" I asked again, nowadays I often ask him such questions, maybe it's just because of the excitement.

"Luke, but if you don't want it, we can change it." He sat next to me since the swing I was sitting on was big, he held my tummy to feel our baby.

"What if she's a girl? Are you still going to be happy?" I rested my head on his chest, he brushed my hair and nodded as an answer.

"Of course I will, besides you are the most important to me, whether we have a baby or not, we can still be happy, you'll always be my baby, Jade." I smiled after he said that.

But it was all a lie.month's had passed I am 6 months pregnant when this girl came into my life, she befriended me and after one month, she admitted to me that she likes my husband, she pushed me down the stairs of our house causing my child to miscarry .

Along with the loss of my son, I also lost my husband.

And you know what is the worst part? That girl who pushes me is his mistress.

I was walking in the heat while wiping my tears, I didn't know where I was going, my husband didn't even follow me.

"Taxi!" when I feel like I'm dizzy because of the extreme heat, I have nowhere else to go now but my parents' house, that's where I'll be returning after 4 years.

well, after my son fell, we were still pretty good, there were misunderstandings because we blamed each other for what happened, he always blamed me for the loss of our son.

Little by little I remembered the first fight we had.

"It's late, where are you from?" I met him, he ignored me, in fact he just passed me like the wind.

"Azriel I am talking to you, what are you doing to yourself? Just get drunk at night-." I asked worried, he put his hand on my mouth to shut me up.

I tried to remove his hand before facing him.

"Azriel, rest your liver."

"I'm tired, Jade. Please lecture me tomorrow, just like you said, it's late, why aren't you sleeping yet?"

"Maybe I'm worried, it's 2am in the morning and you're going home wasted, can't you just moved on from what happe-" I stopped after he hit the table, I admit. I felt fear.

"Can you just stop bringing up the topic? You don't want to accept that it was because of your negligence that our son was lost, because you weren't careful! It's your fault Jade," A strong slap made him stop, his head also tilted slightly because of the force.

"Yes! It's my fault Azi but please! don't talk to me like you're the only one who lost! Azriel is my son too! It hurts too but I can't do anything but move on!" I shouted at him, I bit my lower lip to stop the tears from falling in my eyes.

"So tell me? How can I move on Jade? Tsngina! That's our child, why do you seem so quick to just throw it away and tell me to move on." He shouted back, which is why I closed my eyes a little.

"Azi, if I don't move on, what will happen to us? If we both fall down, how can we get up again? It hurts me too but I'm trying to forget to help you get out! Because if I don't help you, maybe even our relationship won't recover completely!" I let my tears fall because I know something is wrong, we have a problem, that we are not okay.

I was crying silently inside the taxi while thinking how did we end up like this?

If we didn't lose our son, would everything end up like this?

I turned to the driver when he took a sip, he smiled at me before handing me the tissue.

"I'm sorry man." I apologized while wiping my tears.

"That's okay, go live now, crying is not good, it's ugly." He whispered so I laughed weakly, I nodded before forcing myself to stop crying.

What can my husband do now? Is he happy that I signed the divorce papers that he had to sign a long time ago? I just shook my head because of my thoughts.

I shouldn't stress myself, I'm not alone now, if only I had told him that I was pregnant, maybe there would be hope that we would be okay.

the car stopped in front of our house, I immediately reached for the payment before going inside.

I looked around the whole house, it was my unstoppable tears.

I sat on the sofa while remembering the fun things we did here, I smiled bitterly before getting up and going up to the bedroom.

I leaned my head on the door frame as I watched Azriel and I's room, this is probably the one I will miss the most.

I sniffed and that's when I noticed that my face was wet, I wiped the tears that were dripping before taking my suitcase.

One by one I put all my things there, clothes, shoes, I didn't leave anything. Almost all the things in the room belong to Azi, so it's less hassle to bring my things.

I looked around the whole house for the last time, I was about to open the door but I was stopped when it suddenly opened.

"Where are you going?" Azriel asked, looking down at the suitcase I was carrying before nodding.

"You're leaving." He added, I just nodded my head before continuing to pull my suitcase.

I was about to step out but I was immediately stopped when he spoke.

"Make sure you don't leave a single thing behind, Jade. I don't want to remember anything about you." I almost froze because of the pain after he said that.

Really Azriel? Do you really hate me that much.

CHAPTER 2

"Maybe I didn't leave anything, by the way. I've already cooked for you so you don't have to order your lunch, there's porridge in the kitchen. I'm leaving." I was about to step past him but he immediately grabbed my arm causing me to stop again.

"Take that, Jade. I won't eat it either." He said seriously, I frowned at him before putting down my suitcase.

"Have you eaten?" I asked, fvck this love, why am I still worried about him despite all the bad things he said?

"It's over, Monica brought lunch to the office earlier." I bent slightly to wipe the tears that were about to fall.

"Ah, I have to leave, I can't wrap anymore. Just feed it to the polite dogs." I tried to straighten my voice so he wouldn't know I was crying.

"See you on the next other half love." I said goodbye, he laughed sarcastically before nodding.

"See you never, Jade." His cold response was, love, just call me love.

I took a deep breath before loading my things into my car, I memorized the look of Azriel's house before I finally left.

I just cried when I got to my parents house, they know that Azi and I have had problems but I don't mention to them the divorce that he is asking for.

"Mom, I didn't save it, I didn't save our marriage." I said crying before hugging mommy, she's the only people I know that can comfort me at these hours. "Mom, Am I not a good wife?" When I questioned him, he shook his head before combing my hair with his finger to help me calm down.

"Shh, It's not your fault, stop blaming yourself." when he sat me down, he helped me sit on the sofa before the water reached.

"Should I remove this?" I said while looking at the engagement and wedding ring on my finger.

Rings as symbols of love never ending.

I smiled bitterly after realizing that it wasn't true.

"If you want then remove them but if you're not yet ready, you can just stay there until you're ready to set yourself free." Mommy answered, I drank again from the water she handed me because I felt like I was going to run out of water from crying so much.

It was said in the book I read, What went wrong to the love that once was strong?

Right now I'm just thinking about the child in my womb, how can I handle my child growing up without a father? How can I handle him growing up like me without even knowing his father?

Should I have an abortion? Of course not, I've lost everything, my son, my husband and I might go crazy if my child is lost too.

"That's how deep you think." I turned around when mommy suddenly entered my room, she was carrying milk and was obviously getting ready to sleep.

"Mom, of course. You shouldn't have mixed me up, I can do it by myself. You should rest, it's getting late." I said while reaching for a glass of milk, he laughed at me before looking at what I was sketching.

"New client?" He asked while looking at the ball gown I was designing.

"Yes mom, you're too picky and artistic with your designs, you need to stay up late." I answered, he opened the next page of my scetch pad and he was greeted by my unfinished drawing for Azriel, I was going to give it as a gift for our Wedding Anniversary next month, but the case didn't make it.

Mommy took a deep breath before kissing my forehead.

"Don't forget to rest okay?" I nodded in response, he immediately left because he was said to be sleepy.

i handed my phone and started scrolling into my facebook account, I stalked Azriel's account because I felt a sense of missing him, for four years now I just can't sleep next to him again, it's a strange feeling, the kind that seems to have not enough.

"Azi, do you miss me too? Do you also cry at these times?" I asked while staring at his profile picture, it seems like only last year the two of us were still on it, now it's not.

he also doesn't post much because he is too busy with his patients, also he's running their family business that has been passed down to him, I even had a strong heart to think that he would never have another woman because apart from that I have confidence to him, I also know that he is gonetime to be a girl.And now here I am again questioning my own worth.

I shook my head while wiping my tears, I didn't notice that I had been staring at his pictures.

I checked his albums, I smiled after seeing that he hasn't deleted our pictures yet, tsk, Am I still hoping that he will come back to me?

He chases Monica.

I turned off the light in the room and immediately covered myself with a blanket, that's where I poured out all my tears, risking being exhausted and tired.

I woke up because I felt like my stomach was turning, I'm used to it because I've been like this for almost a week, Azriel just doesn't know because he leaves early for work.

I smiled happily after seeing that I was not in my room with Azi, I'm at my Maidens home.

New home, New beginning.

in the following days I tried to live without him, tried to wake up every day without thinking about him and crying, well it was hard at the beginning but I could handle it, I could handle it, not for me but for my baby.

I won't deny that I'm still crying, because it's not really that easy, but at least, I'm able to accept that this is it, that I have to wake up every day without Azi by my side, without a good morning from him.

Well, Azi and I have been in a relationship for 11 years, who would have thought that everything would end up like this?

Sometimes I even wonder what potion Monica used on Azriel just so I could use it on him too and get him back to me.

I'm 2 months pregnant, my belly isn't that big yet and mommy still doesn't know that I'm pregnant because I'm afraid she'll tell Azi, knowing her, she might attack Azriel just to force him to get back with me.

"What happened?" mommy asked, she was already eating breakfast and she must have noticed that I hadn't eaten yet.

"Why are you covering your nose?" He asked more. "Don't you like the foods?" He said as if sulking, I laughed weakly before spooning food even though I smelled, is this really what it's like to be pregnant? It's a shame that it's my favorite and I can't eat it.

I hold my breath every time I take a bite, I feel like I'm going to vomit because of the smell, I really can't.

Mommy looked at me when I put my plate away, she smelled the food because I didn't let go of my nose.

"Are you okay?" he asked, he came closer to me to check my forehead and neck, my god I'm not sick!

"I'm fine p-" I ran after throwing up, mommy followed me until we reached the sink.

I can see her raising her eyebrows, I know what she's thinking, my mom is not dumb.

"Are you not telling me something?" He asked, It scares me.

"No mom, you're overthinking I'm just vomiting because I drank last night." When I lie.

"There's no bottle of wine in your room, huh? You went to bed early last night, but you never know how to lie, Jade." He shook his head before taking out his cell phone, I was quick to grab it but he just held it up so I couldn't reach it.

"Okay, jump." He challenged me, I sneered at him then I was about to jump but he immediately stopped me.

"Are you out of your mind do you want to be filmed again?" He said stressed, I laughed at him before his shoulder became a captain.

"I'm not." I refuse, she continues dialing to her phone trying to call our family doctor.

"Yes this is Mrs. Guaren, I want to talk to Mrs. Vejasa, it seems like my daughter is sick." When he talked on the phone, I ran until I got back to the dining table."Wait for the doctor, Mrs. Vejasa is not around, she is in another country, so let's just wait for their temporary family doctor to assist us, just don't tell the doctor that you are pregnant, I'm telling you Jade! I'll slap you myself your spouse." It's a threat, I just made it hard for him but inside me, I really want to be alone because I'm nervous about mommy.

CHAPTER 3

We waited for a few more minutes, I could feel myself sweating because of the nervousness, of course the doctor will find out that I'm pregnant. I have nothing to lose here.

"Ma'am, Sir Azriel is outside, shall I open it?" when our assistant asked for permission, my eyes widened before running upstairs and hiding in my room.

"Jusko what is he doing here." I whispered in the air while leaning against the door of my room, I took deep breaths to calm myself down, excitement, anger, pain, I don't understand what I'm feeling, all I hear is his name and that's how I immediately react. that's why when I saw ithe?"Jade open this door."I heard mommy's knock, I straightened myself up before opening the small door, I peeked to see if anyone was with her but there wasn't, I was about to open it big when Azriel suddenly came behind mommy so I tried my best to close it again but Azi is stronger than me that's why it was openedit's the door."What are you doing here?" I asked trying to hold my anger and tears.

I thought I wouldn't cry when I saw him.

See you never, don't you? What is he doing here?

He didn't answer my question, instead he just walked closer to me wearing his serious expression.

I couldn't do anything but retreat, because I might just slap him if I didn't stop myself.

"Azi please get out." I said calmly, he reached my hand before pulling me to the bed.

"What happened to you? Are you sick?" he asked, I heard the worried tone on his voice trying his best to hide it with his cold voice.

"W-Nothing, even if I'm sick. I can take care of the s-" I stopped after he put the back of his palm on my forehead and neck, trying to check my temperature.

"It's not fever, tell me what happened?" He asked, he tried to reach my hand but I refused it, I looked in another direction and did not answer his question.

He grabbed my chin and held it in front of him before looking me straight in the eyes.

"What's wrong? We've only been apart for a month and it hurts." He sighed before looking around my room.

"I'm not sick." I answered bravely, I looked in another direction so that he wouldn't see the tears forming in my eyes, even if I wanted to tell him that I was pregnant, I couldn't.

I looked at the side table of my bed, my eyes widened after seeing the pregnancy test on it, wait, how? You're really bad, Jade!

"Now I know." he said seriously while seriously looking at the pregnancy test, I felt scared, I want to send him away because I can't stand his presence anymore.

"W-What are you talking about, go away Azi!" I pushed him away, I stood up on the bed so I could push him out but I almost lost my balance when he suddenly pulled my waist closer to him, he grinned before lifting me back to the bed.

"Azriel what the hell! Go away!" I shouted at him, almost crying, I can't control my feelings, I feel like I'm going to explode because of the mixed emotions I'm feeling right now.

"You're pregnant." He said seriously before looking down at my stomach, I immediately pushed his face away from me.

"That's not mine!" When I lie, he raises his eyebrows before doing that downward smile that makes him look cool.

"Whose? Your mom's?" He asked sarcastically, I tortured him before shaking his head, why is he acting like this? why doesn't he get his girlfriend pregnant and that's what's bothering him?!

"To my friend." I answered proudly, I bent down to think of answers to the other questions he would ask.

"Lies." He said before touching my chin to align it with his face. "In our 11 years together, I know when you tell the truth or when you lie, so tell me, how many months has it been?" Wrinkled when he asked, I raised my eyebrows before answering his question.

"What are you doing?" I answered annoyed, he took a deep breath before wrapping his arm around my waist and pulling me closer to him.

"I'm patiently asking you Mrs. Sevar-"

"Correction, Ms. Guaren." I cut him, I felt that he was not happy because of that, why? He is the one to blame, isn't he? I loved and served him and then he asked me to replace him with a woman who couldn't tell if she was a snake or a human.

"Fine, but why did you still wear those rings?" he asked while looking at the rings on my finger, I looked at his finger which I wish I hadn't done because it felt like I was stabbed with several hundred knives after seeing that the wedding ring was gone.

Where are you? Thrown away?

Is it that easy for him to take it off? because it's not mine, I can't do it yet, but I cannot blame him, we're not married anymore so what's that ring for?

I looked at the ring before taking it off right in front of him.

"Here." I said before handing it to him, he seemed surprised by what I did and didn't respond immediately, I forced his hand to open before letting him hold the two rings he gave me.

Finished

Azriel didn't leave my side until late in the afternoon, he ate there too, mommy wasn't mad at him, in fact, we were shiniship again, like children.

Azi, on the other hand, is still teasing mom, you think she really enjoys teasing us and she almost threw up on me when she was making me sign the divorce papers.

"Don't move!" I complained when he moved the show, he's watching basketball. We were like this at our old house, every time I watched a drama he would change the channel to watch basketball.

I stood up before grabbing the remote from him, I returned it to the drama I was watching, I quickly burst into tears because the hero was about to leave.

I noticed that Azi was just looking at me while I was crying, I also felt that he was suppressing his laughter so I gave him a bad look before throwing a pillow at him.

"Apple." I snorted before going back to crying, I didn't stop until the show was over, as long as the show was that long Azriel was staring at me.

"You're not coming home yet? It's late, maybe your Monica is looking for you." I said sarcastically while making my bed.

"I'll sleep here." He answered. "I won't leave until you admit to me that the pregnancy test is mine." I stopped fixing for a moment before facing him.

"Then what if it's mine? How are you sure you're the father, hmm Azi?" I said defiantly, I backed away when he approached me.

"W-what are you doing? I'm going to sleep Azi." I said while continuing to step backwards.

I didn't notice that the bed was behind me that's why I almost fell after I couldn't balance, Azi reached my back and kissed my forehead before helping me to stand up.

"Your eyes only looked at me like that Jade, good night." I couldn't move because of that.

why is he doing this? If he is doing this for the child, he should stop because little by little I am hoping that he still loves me, that he will still come back to me.