My Mate, My Hate

Arya

Cool air winnows through my White fur as we race down the woods towards the Misty river that separates Blue Blood and Blacktooth Guardians. Jex races alongside me in his grey wolf and communicates to me through the mind link that we should continue down the river and drink some water. We slope down to the river, the grass under my paws getting wetter and colder the nearer we get.

Looking up at the sky, the full moon shines relentlessly in the deep grey skin dotted with many stars. On this day of the initiation, Jex and I are among the lucky people who shifted into our new wolves. I am so excited and giddy as hell like a cat that just ate the canary. This has been the longest awaited time of my life and I am very ready to go wild tonight.

I look on the opposite side of the river, in the territory of the Blacktooth Guardians. When you just judge from here, the is no difference between the Blue Blood pack and the Blacktooth Guardians pack. The trees, the grass, and everything else look the same, but what lies beyond it is what defines the difference. The Blacktooth Guardians pack is way more powerful than us but my brother is much more lovable than Alpha Logan. Everyone in the land fears him because of his ruthlessness and violence, though it has enabled him to build a very large empire around himself. Despite everything, the Blue Blood pack has got something they desire and can never own; gold.

"A hare!" Jex screams through the mind link. My eyes dart to the furry animals on the opposite side of the river. My wolf instincts to dash to it start acting. Though I am still new in this body, I can still control it somehow. I take two steps back and watch the animal more intensely. It munches on some grass without taking notice of our presence. On normal occasions, I would have just cried about how cute it looks but all my wolf wants is to feed. I bend lower to the ground, ready to pounce over the small river.

"Don't!" Jex warms me. "It is not right to hunt from another pack's territory. It's a law!"

I know that very well. As the daughter of the late Alpha, I have been raised well aware of the rules, but I want to feed my wolf for the first time. I want to hunt and catch my very first prey.

Ignoring his warning, I jump over and fail to make it to the other side. I dive with a big loud splash into the cold water.

"Arya!" I can hear Jex screaming angrily at me and then jumping into the water after me. I am sure I don't need to save. I know how to swim. But you don't tell the overprotective Jex about that shit!

We swim to the bank dripping with the cold water which makes the fur stick to our bodies. I try to shake the water off and look at Jex who is just starring at me.

"What the hell were you thinking?" he is practically fuming. I look around us and realize the hare is not there. Damn it! We must have scared it off with the splashing in the water. I curse myself for having no proper sprint to jump the river.

"It's gone. We scared it off," I murmur.

"Good! Let's go back now before we get into trouble," he says, turning to look back to where we have come from.

"Come on, Jex! Don't be a scaredy-cat. Let's look around for another. Surely there is more than one around. I want to hunt," I tell him.

"I am not scared. I am trying to be sensible here. Let's go hunt from our territory. There are also hares and probably many more other animals we can hunt," he says.

"But we are already here, let's just do it here. I promise not to go far. I doubt if we shall get into any trouble if we don't go far," I try to convince him though deep in my mind, I know it's not right. Hell! Life is full of risks. Living itself is a god-damned risk!

Jex is my friend and my protector and has been since I was born. I know I am very stubborn and sometimes I get on his nerves, more often than I intend, but he is very nice and patient with me. That's why we have been together and so close for this long.

"Please, Jex. I promise we'll get back immediately," I tell him and he looks resignedly. Yes! Now I know I have won. I know how much he treasures my happiness much more than his own. I used to think it was too much until I got used to it.

"Okay, but please don't go far," he begs.

"Sure," I tell him and sneak into the partially dark woods. Thanks to the full moon we can spot another hare. I take my time to calculate my steps and when I catch it, I become so excited that I almost let go of it. Jex keeps closely behind watching me as I devour my prize.

As we walk back towards the river, Jex turns towards me and I immediately try to smile. That's when I realize that I am now in my wolf form and I can't smile. How the hell am I supposed to display my emotions?

"Be careful this time not to dive into the water," Jex warms me. I mentally roll my eyes at his brooding nature. "The water is too cold for you to get into again."

At that moment, we hear movements and we stop dead in our tracks. The movements get closer and my heart hammers in its cage. Are we in trouble?

"Jump! Now!" Jex commands me. As I jump, I am caught in something. I watch with fear as Jex manages to make it to the bank on the other side. My vision is blurred by threads networked, and that's when I realize that I have been caught in a net. There are murmurs around me. I try to turn in my trap but I can't. I see a pair of big black boots and then feel a sharp piercing pain on my side. My world spins and spins. I look into Jex's scared eyes, my eyelids become heavy and my vision blurs. The last thing I see is Jex jumping from the bank and everything around me turns black.

I try to open my eyes my eyelids weigh a fucking tonne. My head is swimming and I feel like I am sinking. I hear fainting sounds that keep getting clearer. I manage to open my eyes and all I can see is a stone wall. I try to think, to remember what happened. The first thing that comes to my mind is Jex jumping to save me. Jex! Where is he? Is he alright? Where the hell am I and what happened to me?

A door creaks open and the same black boots I saw before blacking out appear in front of me.

"It's clear that she is from the Blue Blood pack. We caught her in our territory, hunting," I heavy manly voice says. I try to get up from where I am but I can even lift my head. Did they drug me? I wish to shift but I will be naked if I do, and I don't want that.

"Alpha Logan is interested in seeing what we've got. Seems the Blue Blood pack has surely forgotten the terms of peace we put amongst us, and Alpha won't hesitate to remind them," he adds with a scornful laugh. My stomach churns with fear at the sound of 'Alpha Logan'. This is total shit! I hate to admit that I should have listened to Jex, but it is too late to regret that now.

"You should shift right now," a different male voice says. I now gather up the strength to look up at the two of them. One is a bearded heavy man in the black boots and another a skinny man with no beard at all. Quite an odd pair I should say.

I hope don't expect me to shift in front of them. That would be too much and quite disrespectful even though I am their captive.

A young woman with coffee-brown hair walks into the room with a neat pile of clothes in her hands.

"We shall now leave you to shift and use these clothes if you want," says the skinny man. I mentally roll my eyes at the last statement, finding it so unnecessary to add. Is he giving me the option to stay naked when I shift?

Logan

Sitting in the library, I wait for her. I would have let her go off easily if I didn't get to know that she is a royal. I wouldn't let this opportunity slip straight into my hands. Carl and I laid down the rules, after the death of his father but he was careless enough to let his sister get out of his sight.

I pour some wine into a glass and walk to the window. The perfectly round moon looms over the mansion like a watcher, silently watching everything taking place beneath it. Blue Blood pack is holding an initiation ritual today. They must have been too occupied to notice the princess run away.

"Here she is," a voice announces.

"Leave her here, and go," I say without turning my head to see. I have seen Blue Blood pack's princess on a few occasions, especially when her father was still alive. She was still young by then and I would just see her from afar. She was her father's most precious possession.

I hear a loud swallow followed by nervous fidgeting, a shuffle of cloth, and heavy breathing. Is she scared? If me or the room? Well, why not? She is a captive.

"The moon is so bright tonight, wouldn't you agree?" I say, and then take a long sip from the glass. I turn and lean toward the large window. The sight in front of me nearly throws me off balance.

She's trying to look composed but I can sense her nerves. She looks me directly in the eyes, disarming me. Very daring, I notice. She looks very fragile under the white cotton dresses and her hair falls loosely on her shoulders. Her skin is pale, almost matching the dress. She looks so... delicate.

"Why are you here, Arya?" I ask the obvious, intending to get words out of her. She keeps silent. I take two steps toward her. She is still stationary where she was left, just in front of the door. She looks terribly scared like I have grown two heads on my neck. A take two more steps and her scent gushes into my nostrils like a hypnotizing smoke. My wolf stirs in its wake well aware of who is before him. I almost pounce on her but I manage to keep my wolf under control. I breathe in her scent one more time and my wolf purrs.

"You don't want to talk? You are so frightened I am worried you might have a breakdown. You had the audacity to cross a river to come all the way here. Surely a few words wouldn't fail. Am I right, Arya?"

I place the glass on the table and pocket my hands in my pocket, my eyes never leaving hers.

"If you want to go home and save the chicken friend of yours, you will have to talk to me," I tell her, getting the reaction I expected. Her eyes get unbelievably wide at the mention of her friend.

"Where is Jex? What did you do to him?" her voice is hasty and undoubtedly full of concern. Now that's a weak spot.

"Nothing that can take his life," I tell her. She gasps and quickly regains her composure.

"If you hurt Jex, I promise I won't forgive you," she threatens. I am amused. No one threatens me.

"There is no need for that. I am sure you are incapable of even harming a hair on my head," I tell her.

"What do you want from me?" she inquires.

Right now, all I want is to get my hands on your skin and feel every inch of it, to sniff her entire body until I am drunk with her scent. I am taken aback by how wayward my thoughts have gone just at the sight of her. My Mate. How long I have waited to know who she is?

"You would want to take a sit if you want to negotiate with me. I am sure you are going to be here for some good hours," I tell her, pulling out a chair for her. She raises an eyebrow questioningly at me.

"Your friend has gone to call for a rescue party. I promised him I won't let you go without having a few words with Carl," I answer her unspoken question.

She refuses to take the sit and folds her hands in front of her small chest.

"This is a small issue that surely shouldn't be taken this far. You don't have to involve my brother in this. Why can't you negotiate this only with me?" asks Arya.

"You seem to have forgotten who is involved in your so-called 'small issue'. You are the Alpha's sister. You are worth a whole lot of ransom. Besides, you wouldn't want to know what I would settle for if you want to be the only one involved in this negotiation, baby girl," I tell her.

"Why would you ransom? Am I kidnapped?" she asks.

"Consider yourself so. You can't take this against me. You brought yourself here, Arya. No one forced you to come to Blacktooth Guardians' territory. I know you are well aware of that," I reply.

"We only crossed the river and caught a hare. It's not like we burnt down your woods," she says.

"I am sorry, pretty face but you intruded and that is against the rules that your pack agreed to abide by," I tell her with a shrug.

"You caused this by yourself. Now stay back and watch the results of your stubbornness," I tell her and smirk.

"How much do you want? You are already well off, actually better off than my brother and I. Is it the gold that you want?" she asks. I chuckle, trying to restrain my laughter.

"Is that what you think? That the only thing the Blue Blood pack can give is gold? It's the only thing you have, pretty face. If I took it away from you, your pack would be so broke and its members would start to seek support from me. Do you know what would happen next?" I walk slowly towards her and then behind her, examining her body carefully. She remains silent and listens intently. "Of course, I wouldn't refuse to help them. I maybe am ruthless but I wouldn't want to watch people starve to death and go around naked. They will start to depend on me, and then I would control them." I gaze with hunger at the naked skin exposed by the dress at the shoulders. My wolf stirs more powerfully and without thinking twice, I reach out my hand and brush off the hair on her shoulder to the side, exposing her neck. Her body goes still, and for a moment she stops breathing. I close my eyes and incline my face closer to her neck and sniff her. My thoughts float and whatever I was saying evaporates from my lips. Her sweet seductive scent is tantalizing, I can almost taste it on my tongue.

Arya takes a deep shaky breath but does not move. Can she feel it too? The attraction, the mate bond? If yes, then she is succeeding at hiding it. I would feel some relief if I could pull her into myself and lick every inch of her skin, hear her heartbeat, and...

Control! I need control! I can't let her see me in this stupor; very weak and needy for her.

I gather my tattered strength and take a step away from her. My instincts tell me to get her out of her, take her to my bedroom, tie her to it and claim exactly what belongs to me. I try to shake off my lustful thoughts in vain. The strength of the force that hangs in the air between us is too much, it's scary. I have never felt anything like this in my life.

"What if your brother does not agree with my terms, I will happily keep you here and look into what conclusions you and I can come to," I say, my voice coming out hoarse.

"Why don't we just jump to them now? Why take the long route, Alpha Logan? I am well aware you are a man who does not like to be delayed," she asks. She turns her head to look at me and then gives me a small smile.

"I like that you know that about me. I like that a lot. However, I am calculating. I know what I have decided is better though it will delay. I can be patient sometimes," I tell her. She chuckles, the sound reverberates in my ears, down my spine, and throughout my body.

"If you think my brother will fall for your trap of penetrating the gold business, then I am afraid you are wrong, Alpha. You should know that better than I do," she says.

"But you are his sister. You are the most precious thing he has. He couldn't afford to lose you," I tell her. " I know he will come here running when he hears of what happened to you. He will plead for me to let you go and I will make him beg."

"Is that what you want? Do you like people begging you, bowing to you? It makes you feel almighty and powerful. Are you that greedy and selfish?" she inquires.

"I don't have to clarify anything to you, pretty face. You are free to think whatever you wish. I won't justify myself. And just to be clear, I am not interested in taking over your gold. As of now," I tell her.

I walk away from her leaving her puzzled. I take a sit in one of the chairs and pour myself a drink.

"Come on and drink with me. Keep me company while we both wait for our savior brother to come dashing into my castle in his shining armor," I say and laugh sarcastically. I gulp down the wine and look directly into her brown eyes. Those eyes bewitch me. It's like she can see straight through me. Like they can pierce through the stone wall I have built around myself for all these years. I pour in some more wine and gulp all of it down my throat, hoping to ease off the lustful heat surging inside me. She just stands there in the same spot even when I offer her a sit once again. I should be displeased by her stubbornness but I am quite amused by her equilibrium and confidence.

Arya

I try to steady my breath as I watch Logan sip the glass of wine in his hands. He then licks his lips and my throat goes dry immediately. These are going to be the longest hours of my life! I am fighting every urge in me to go and join him and the small round table. I could use some wine myself because my nerves can't seem to calm down after my wolf started screaming; mate! Mate!

Alpha Logan can't be my Mate. He is the most ruthless man I have ever known! My pack, my family, and my own conscious loath his being. I can't be his. I can't let myself get entwined into his dark life when I can stop all this. I can reject him!

My wolf twists painfully at the thought of rejecting her mate. I just met my wolf and then my mate. My life is racing on its axis, I am scared things are happening too fast I might lose my mind!

We hear some commotion outside. My heart skips. I close my eyes and try to focus. He is here!

"It seems our dearest brother has come to take you back home," Logan says, placing the glass on the table. "He couldn't afford to waste any time. I think he doesn't trust me to keep you alive for long. He tilts his head and gives me a crooked smile. I get a glimpse of his perfectly white teeth. I ball my fists, begging myself to resolve on only seeing the imperfections because he is just too perfect. His height, his hair, his eyes, his lips, god! It's too much! How can someone be so perfect?

Look on the other side, I tell myself. He is a brute! He is a murderer. His family is the reason why you are an orphan. He works with Vampires; the wolves' mortal enemies. He is equally as evil as they are, or even worse! Who knows what he is capable of? He even threatened to kidnap me and keep me here!

The door opens and a servant leads my brother, Jex, and Beta, Kurt into the huge library. I am more worried than relieved to see them here. Logan is going to make things so difficult for them that it will cost them a lot to get me out of here.

"Alpha Logan," Carl says nodding towards my mate who gets up from his seat.

"Welcome to my humble abode, Alpha. Your sister and I were having a good time. I wouldn't have minded you delaying a bit more. She is quite some company," says Logan, his eyes shifting from Carl's to mine. A devilish smile creeps onto his handsome face. My insides shiver when he looks at me, as if he means what he just said. I am sure I have just been a dead bore this entire time, doing nothing other than shivering with fear. He surely is sarcastic!

"I am surprised that she managed to do so," Carl says and shoots me a reproachful glare. I know I have committed a big crime trespassing into the Blacktooth Guardians pack and forcing this meeting to happen. I am sure my brother is not comfortable dealing with this and neither am I. I know I should have listened to Jex. I know all that now, but it's a waste regretting because I can't turn things around now. What has happened has happened. And I am the one who has received the hardest blow. Alpha Logan of the Blacktooth Guardians pack is my god-damned mate!

"We solemnly apologize for Arya's naivete. I don't know what got into her. She has been raised well aware of the rules that govern this land. She just received her wolf, she must have been too excited she let it get into her head," Carl tries to convince Logan.

"Indeed, Carl, I trust how protective you are of your little sister. She must have rebellious broken loose. Well, as you are well aware, I never let things pass me as easily as they come. I have a deal for you. If you can negotiate my proposal, then you can safely take her back home and promise not to let any pack member, whose life still matters, to get loose again," he says.

"Sure, what's your deal?" inquires Carl.

"I would prefer I took to you in private; Alpha to Alpha," he says and then pockets his hands in his neatly pressed slacks.

"Okay," Carl nods to us in a sign of dismissal. I shot Logan a hateful scowl but it does not affect him at all. I walk out of the room followed by Jex.

"Arya, are you alright? I am sure he did his best to make you as uncomfortable as he could," Jex says, examining me with worried eyes.

"Don't worry about me. I am fine. He isn't as beastly as I pictured him to be. I guess he was at his best manners," I say. Then I wonder if he was actually trying to be nice to me because he knows I am his mate. Does he know? He didn't act like he did. I resolve to reject him before he even gets to know. Yes, that would be a lot better!

"Arya?" Jex's voice awakes me from my reverie.

"Huh?" I murmur in confusion.

"Did you hear what I just said?" he inquires with a frown.

"Um, what were you saying?" I ask. He shakes his head in disbelief.

"Are you sure you are alright? I really doubt he didn't do anything," he says.

"Trust me, Jex. I am fine. He wouldn't have dated to do anything to me. He would otherwise be wedging war against the Blue Blood pack, breaking the peace that has existed all these years," I try to reassure him.

"The peace you refer to might have as well cracked as we talk," he says and raises a brow at me. I try to shake off the pang of guilt. I might have ruined the peace. It sucks being the reason my brother has to face Alpha Logan to negotiate God knows what terms he wants. He said he didn't want to interfere with the gold. As of now, he added. This means that he is interested in the gold but he won't use it as a ransom.

"Don't begin with me, Jex. I know this is all my fault and I am already feeling worse than anyone else here. You were right, I know but what can I do about it now," I tell him. I am starting to think that this is all fate's doing that I had to meet my mate in this kind of way. Meeting your mate is supposed to be the happiest moment of a wolf's life, but saying my meeting was hideous would be an understatement.

"I don't want to blame you because I think it was my fault that I let you convince me to cross the Misty river. Carl was so furious with me, you know. He trusted me to protect you and I failed," he says.

"I am so sorry, Jex. I promise I will make it up to you when we get back home," I tell him. I put on a huge smile, hoping to smooth off his gloom. He sighs heavily and folds his hands in front of his chest.

We are led downstairs to a room furnished with old fancy charm. I am captivated by the beauty of the room and the parts of the mansion I have been to. Well, except for the stone-walled room that I woke up in.

"You will wait in here while Alpha proceeds with his meeting," the man that brought us in tells us and then exits, closing the door behind him.

I walk around the room, looking around in wonder, amazed by what I am seeing. Alpha Logan is the richest alpha amongst the five packs in the land. I had heard of his fancy mansion but this is my first time in it. All this will also be mine if I become his. It's too much!

Would be happy to know that I am his mate? Would he love me unconditionally? Would he even try to be romantic at all? I try to picture a romantic love strike Alpha Logan but I can't. It's a total loss! This is not the kind of mate I had hoped to have. I wanted someone sweet, and romantic, even though not that wealthy but at least kind, and understanding, which Logan is not! Manly? Woah, hell yeah he is manly but he is none of the other things. I wonder how Jex or Carl would react to the information. Wondering how they would react gives me goosebumps.

"Do you want to talk about what happened when I was away? You look too thoughtful and I can guess it's too unpleasant to think about," Jex says. I don't want to talk to anyone about it. It's already egregious enough that I know it.

I take my time admiring the large window and the curtains. I reach for it and look through it. The moon is going down into the woods. It's almost morning. The view from here is wow! I can the surrounding mountains, mostly covered with wood.

"I woke up in one of the rooms downstairs. I was told the Alpha wanted to meet me so I was given this dress. I was in my wolf form so I shifted and put it on," I tell him, unnecessarily adding the details so that I don't leave him a gap to doubt.

"I was led into his library, which you have also been to. Then he told me you had gone back home to inform Carl to come and save me. I insisted that he didn't need to involve my brother and that I can negotiate my way through this but he said I wouldn't manage the terms he would want to set with me so he would prefer dragging my brother all the way from home," I add.

"Is it about the gold?" he inquires.

"That's what I thought, but he said it's not. I completely have no idea what he wants," I respond.

"I hope he makes a sensible proposal. He is making too big a deal out of such a small issue," Jex shakes his head.

After about an hour of impatient waiting, Carl comes into the room.

"We can go home now," he announces, but his face remains grim.

"What does he want?" I ask dashing towards him.

"Let's talk at home," he responds coldly. He must be really mad at me. I nod silently and we are led out of the room. As we descend the stairs, I keep looking back up unconsciously, hoping to look at Logan one last time before I go. Each step out of the house is like a piercing to my wolf. I fight the urge to break loose and run back up to his library and surrender myself into his arms and let him mark me, own me.

As we head to the door, I resolve to look straight in front of me. I pray that I never come back here and hope never to see Logan ever again. My wolf wimps and curls in pain. I feel sick to the core having to hurt my wolf when I have just met her. It's not my fault that our mate is the worst person on earth! If he cared, he would have at least let me go without worsening the issue. If he cared he wouldn't have been greedy to ask for ransom. He is a heartless greedy monster and I don't want him to be my Mate! He would have at least come to say goodbye to me like a mate who gives a damn, but he obviously doesn't! One part of me says that maybe he doesn't know that I am his mate but another part of me tells me that he is proud enough to not give a damn even if he knew!