Love and Fear

Lucy lived in a small town on the river's edge, along a winding river on one side and dense green forest on the other. She had been in foster care since her parents died when she was 3. Her foster parents weren't bad people just did it more for the monthly cheque than enriching an orphan girl's life. She had been with Frank and Lois since she was 12, the longest placement she'd had. They let her do what she wanted, never really caring if she came home at all. They'd never notice if left until the cheques stopped coming. Lucy's only friend was a boy named Axel, also in foster care.

Although his family adored him and he had everything a 17-year-old could want his foster parents Kade and Laurel, couldn't have children of their own and Axel was placed with them at age 5. They were in their senior year of high school. Lucy was just waiting to turn 18 in 6 months so she could leave this small town and try and find her family, find out why they never came for her when her parents died. She had a grandfather in Montana and Aunts and Uncles; the social worker said they didn't want her, but she couldn't figure out why. The social worker found out that they had money and means maybe they just didn't like her.

Lucy stood 5 feet 3 inches tall, medium length blonde hair the colour of ash. Her eyes were fiercely blue but had swirls of green that seemed to change with her emotions. Lucy learned early on to keep everything inside emotions meant weakness, and she couldn't let anyone know she was weak. When Lucy turned 13, she met her wolf, Astrid. Astrid was wild and unruly, always trying to surface and take over. Lucy couldn't have that with her human foster parents that would not end well. Her only source of comfort was Liam Axel's wolf. He was the only thing that calmed Astrid.

Axel and Lucy thought maybe the moon goddess made a mistake making their wolves mates and not them. But perhaps they were just kindred souls. They wouldn't know until they both turned 18. They did not feel that way about each other anymore, they became more like family than anything romantic. Axel was a favourite with girls at school. He was tall, 6 feet 3 inches tall Dirty blonde coloured hair, short on the sides longer and loosely tousled on top, eyes the colour of emeralds. A strong square jawline, broad shoulders, your typical athlete where Lucy preferred to keep her nose in a book and out of sight at all costs. Total and complete opposites except that they were werewolves living in a human town with only each other to lean on.

Lucy worked in a bakery before and after school, her foster parents paid for her clothes and phone, but she had to pay her car insurance and save for when she left this town. Axel worked across the street at the auto body shop. So he'd come over for coffee before his shift started after school. Sometimes Lucy wondered if he was checking to make sure Astrid was in check. She liked to lash out when Lucy was under any stress or anxiety. Axel would make Lucy train; the stronger she was physically and mentally, the better Astrid would stay in her mind and not come forward even a bit. Even though Lucy was small, she was fast and cunning. Lucy often wondered what would have happened to her if Axel had never found her in the woods that day.

LUCY(FLASHBACK)

After the social worker told me she had found my family, I was so happy, finally someone to love me. I couldn't wait to meet them, but when the social worker called and said they didn't want me. Everything went black. I woke up naked with a football jersey draped over me in the woods, covered in blood. Axel was sitting with his hands over his face like he was stressed out. When I asked him what happened, he looked afraid to tell me.

"Ax, what am I doing out here? How did I get here? What's going on???"

"Luc, I don't know if I should tell you.... you aren't stable enough; I'm afraid Astrid will come out again."

"Ax, I'm ok. You can tell me I can handle it."

Axel began to tell me what the social worker had said, then bits and pieces of the afternoon started to come back blurry. After hanging up the phone, I ran outside and shifted only for the second time since I got my wolf. I ran through the woods eating small animals and burning off my pain with the run. Then it came back like a ton of bricks, the hiker.....

"I I I killed a hiker..... Astrid killed the hiker. I'm a murderer."

"Luc, breathe, keep her under control ok; remember it happens. You didn't mean it. Astrid was in control. Lucy Bennet would never hurt anyone ever."

(END FLASHBACK)

when Lucy was at the bakery, she was at peace. She would come up with so many desserts, pie, eclairs, turnovers, fancy bread. She'd worked there since she was 14, so the owners gave her free rein to bake whatever she thought people would want, and the town loved it. For a small town, they sure did well, selling out each day. Lucy always made sure they had blueberry scones with cream cheese icing; those were Axel's favourite. The typical day before starting his shift, he came over for a 16oz triple latte, made breve with cream instead of milk and his blueberry scone. Axel never brought girls into the bakery he only came in to visit Lucy. So when he walked in with the most beautiful brunette Lucy had ever seen, she was shocked and a little in awe of this perfect girl, she thought she knew everyone from school so who is this?

"Lucy, I want you to meet Ellen, my sister, Ellen, this is Lucy!" Lucy's mouth dropped open. You could fit a textbook in it.

"Lucy, it's so lovely to meet you!! Axel has told me so much about you."

Lucy, still speechless, just stared at her.

Axel clears his throat "hehem Earth to Lucy?"

"Oh, hi! Oh wow! It's great to meet you too. When.... how..... where did you come from?"

Ellen and Axel both start laughing.

"Well, I didn't want to tell you Axel began until I knew for sure, but it was my foster parents who looked into officially adopting me. They found out about Ellen and contacted her. She just got in last night! Ellen and I are twins. When our mother died during childbirth, they thought it would be easier to find us homes separately. Since there was no father around, we don't even know who he is."

"WOW! Lucy gasped; that's a lot. So are you sticking around, or are you heading back to where did you come from?"

"I still have school to finish, but I want to stay the week and get to know Axel a bit better. What time do you finish? Maybe we can grab some dinner."

"oh, I usually work late, like 10 pm, so perhaps rain check." Just then, Fran, the owner, walked by and interrupted their conversation.

"Lucy dear, why don't you take the night off to spend time being a teenager? You are always here. I can handle closing tonight!" Fran urged.

"Alright, could I meet you guys at Olivia's around 6? I have some dough that's still rising for breakfast that I need to proof."

"Sounds excellent! See you later, Luc!"

As they walked out the door. Lucy was worried something didn't add up. Ellen didn't answer any of her questions. They were so vague..... she could feel Astrid stirring in her mind. She doesn't have a wolf. She can't be his twin..... Astrid said wearily. How can you tell Lucy shot back? Lucy was always hostile towards Astrid after the incident. Astrid because I can tell. I'm stronger than most wolves. That's why you can't hold me back. Why are you just telling me this now, Lucy wined. You'll know soon enough. Astrid said vaguely.

Lucy decided to dress up and try to make it look as effortless as Ellen. Astrid was right something was up, and she was going to figure it out. No one would mess with Axel or Liam. Lucy just couldn't figure it out. What could this Ellen person want? Why she would pretend to be his sister made no sense. Did she know he was a werewolf? Or was it pure coincidence? Lucy put on a knee-length royal blue dress, and black flats curled her hair and tucked it up into a French knot. She left a few strands falling down to frame her face.

Olivia's was the nicest restaurant in town, and the food was binge-worthy. Lucy and Axel ate there often since they were both food freaks. Plus, Axel's foster dad owned the place, so it helped they didn't have to pay for anything.

Lucy walked in and spotted Ellen and Axel. It was strange because they did look like twins, female and male versions of the other, but if Astrid couldn't feel her wolf, what did that mean?

Axel stood to pull Lucy's chair out for her. He already ordered her a spicy virgin Cesar her favourite. Axel was a complete gentleman and always so thoughtful, never forgetting her birthday or noticing when she needed a pick me up. Whoever his mate is would be super lucky.

"so Lucy Axel tells me you are planning a trip around the US when you graduate? That sounds amazing. Where are you planning on going first?"

"I haven't decided yet. I was thinking of just picking a spot on the map and going from there." She lied. She knew exactly where she was going. First, Montana to confront her family. They had usual dinner conversation likes dislikes. Ellen talked about her foster family, her Aunt Bonnie. It wasn't until Axel left to go to the restroom that the first warning sign showed up.

"So, Ellen, you were quick to visit when the Monroe's called you," Lucy stated.

"I was excited to meet my brother. I've always felt so alone like I never fit anywhere," Ellen admitted.

"So, you aren't close with your foster family? You made it seem like you were so close earlier," Lucy shot a little snippily.

"Why are you interrogating me?" Ellen shot back with just as much attitude.

"Just a question, whatever connotation you put on it is all you!" Lucy spat.

"I can see you don't like me!" Ellen said with a fake sad face. Lucy softened a bit.

"I am very protective of Axel. You showing up all of a sudden seems weird to me. I'm sorry if you thought anything else. Do you like running?" Lucy asked, seemingly changing the subject.

"Oh no, I'm not too fond of exercise and nature. I'm a pretty big city girl."

"Hmm, so no running at all?" Ellen looked at Lucy like she had an angle and replied,

"not even in the gym." Astrid started to stir in Lucy's mind again. Lucy knew she was getting agitated. Lucy tried to beg Astrid to settle and not make a scene. Astrid said to ask her what she thinks of werewolves.

"No way!" lucy screamed in her mind.

"Do it! What wolf doesn't like running???It's almost impossible for a wolf to give birth to twins, one being a wolf one being human. If you won't protect Axel and Liam, I will!" And with that, Astrid made a half shift, and when she did, Ellen grabbed the silver knife from the breadbasket and stabbed Lucy's hand by sticking it to the table. They were in the back booth, so not many people could see them, but a bus girl who walked by started screaming. Axel appeared shortly after that, and Astrid was on the verge of a complete shift. When Lucy finally got partial control, Axel pulled the knife out of Lucy's hand and turned to Ellen, but Ellen was gone. Axel wrapped Lucy's hand in a kitchen towel and walked them into his dad's office. Axel didn't say anything for a few minutes. Those few minutes felt like a lifetime to Lucy. Finally, he spoke, but he addressed Astrid, only it wasn't Axel. It was Liam.

"Astrid, are you alright. Did that woman hurt you?" His voice was lower, much raspier than Axel's voice. Lucy had never heard Liam in human form speak as this only Astrid behaved like that. Lucy let Astrid come forward to talk to Liam briefly.

"I am fine, but that woman is not your sister. She has no wolf. She is human." Liam exhaled slowly.

"You don't know the whole story. She is not a werewolf. She is a witch. A hybrid won't be able to shift into her wolf until she meets her mate. That's if her mate is a wolf. If her mate is a warlock, she will not have a wolf. I didn't have time to explain anything to you before she showed up. I wanted to tell you everything. Ellen grew up with my aunt, and she knows a lot about my family history. I didn't know where to start. Astrid, I understand why you did what you did. You are my best friend, and I know you want to protect me, but you can't put Lucy in danger like that. There was a restaurant full of humans. They are all going to expect answers. Once I find Ellen meet me at our spot, we will go for a run." He leaned over and ran his thumb over Lucy's bloody but healing hand. With that, he gave control back to Axel. Axel immediately threw his arms around Lucy and held her tight until Astrid gave her back control. Lucy just sobbed softly in Axel's arms. "I am so sorry I was gone so long, Lucy. I ran into some guys from the shop," Axel explained. Lucy caught her breath and spoke shakily.

"Axel, it is not your job to hover over me, keeping Astrid at bay. You've been responsible for me for too long. You can't be with me all the time. You know I was so jealous that Ellen was your sister I felt like she was taking my place. I'm like your sister." Axel chuckled softly and released Lucy from his firm hold.

"No one, and I mean no one, will ever replace you Luc."

Axel was able to talk Ellen into meeting with Lucy again, this time with all the information.

"Lucy, I am sorry I stabbed you; your wolf is crazed. I have only ever met one other wolf that was wild and untamed. She is currently in a supernatural recovery center," Ellen explained. Fear washed over Axel as he listened to the signs of what put this other wolf there. Lucy didn't belong in a recovery center, but Astrid might. Axel could take care of them. They didn't need anyone's help but his. Lucy asked so many questions about the other wolf she was excited she wasn't alone and that there might be hope for her to figure out what was going on with her wolf. Astrid started to talk to Lucy, telling her that she would not be caged, so do not even think about it.

"Lanie and I were close all through school, and then she got her wolf, and she went almost mad. She killed humans whenever she got stressed and sad her parents died when she was five, so she had no one to help her. Our Aunt, a very powerful witch, put Lanie's Wolf to sleep until she turns 18. They were hoping she'd find her mate and he could calm her wolf, but apparently, Bennet wolves are the strongest wolves. They come from pure Alpha bloodline and need proper training from a young age, or they go feral." Lucy and Axel both gasped at the same time.

"What did you say?" Axel choked out?

"Bennet wolves?" Ellen looked worried at their expressions and repeated herself more slowly, Bennet Wolves.

"I'm a Bennet wolf........" silence fell on them.

Axel hadn't slept in days. He was so stressed out about Astrid being a Bennet wolf, he made Lucy train harder and harder. Lucy was exhausted, and she couldn't keep this up. Ellen had decided to finish her school year here with them to help train Lucy to prevent her from having the same fate as Lanie. Something else was bothering Axel. He couldn't shake the feeling, how odd it was that Lanie and Lucy both lost their parents, and they were both Bennet wolves. Could they be related more than just the name? He didn't want to bring it up to Lucy in case Astrid lost it again.

Then Ellen had an idea.

"I think we've been thinking this the wrong way. Have you ever trained in wolf form?"

"Only running, it was only to tire Astrid out." Lucy explained, the more running she did, the better she stayed put and didn't force herself forward.

"Know a small spell I can temporarily put Astrid to sleep if she gets out of hand. Let's try training in wolf form," Ellen suggested.

Axel looked shocked, He never thought of this before. Could it work? Axel had been doing martial arts since he was placed with the Monroe's. They all did it as a family, so it was easy for him to train Lucy, plus he liked bossing her around. Axel paused to have a small conversation with Liam. Without warning, Liam shifted. He was ready. The problem with training in wolf form is they can't communicate. Because they aren't from the same pack, they can't mind link each other, so they would have to go off of non-verbal communication. Lucy walked over to Liam and ran her fingers through his grey fur.

"Are you sure you trust us, Liam?" she said with so much adoration. He put his face to her face and rubbed up and down like he was saying yes. Lucy looked to Ellen nervously.

"You better climb up that tree. I don't trust Astrid not to hurt you." Lucy got undressed and folded her clothes neatly, almost afraid to shift. She took a deep breath and tried to calm her nerves so that she might have better control over Astrid in wolf form. She turned and shifted so fast it was like a blink. Ellen watched, amazed as this large white and brown wolf stood before her. She was stunning, so much like Lanie, the same brown paws and the same brown circles around the eyes, everything else stark white, the only difference was Astrid's eyes were red and Lanie's Wolf Anna's eyes were Black. Astrid ran up to Liam and playfully bit his hind leg. Liam tackled her to the ground. He motioned for her to watch him, he moved slowly, showing her a jump and roll, and she mirrored his actions perfectly. They did this for many moves. They did this for so long they didn't realize the sun had begun to set. All of a sudden, Astrid bolted into the woods after something. Liam was right on her trail when Astrid stopped dead in her tracks. A rogue snarling and spitting at Astrid Liam jumped in front of Astrid, ready to defend.

ASTRID

DANGER! I could sense it, smell it taste it. I ran as fast as I could to the smell of rotting garbage. I didn't know what the smell was, but I had to get it and kill it before it hurt Liam or Ellen. It's my duty, my job, fight, kill, defend! I skidded to a stop when I came face to face with a rogue! Feral wolves who follow no rules technically Liam and I are also rogues, but because we were separated from our packs and not banished, we didn't smell like rogues, and our humans mainly had control. Axel was really good at keeping Liam back, I tried not to force Lucy out, but she is so innocent and loving she doesn't know what we are capable of, and she doesn't know what our destiny is. I can't tell her. She has got to figure it out for herself, but without the training from our Alpha, we can't become one. As I was about to lunge at the rogue, Liam jumped in front blocked me from him. They started circling each other. Liam was twice the size of the rogue but half the age. Suddenly, the rogue dropped to the ground and shifted back to his human form. I turned to see Ellen. She put his wolf to sleep. Liam shifted back to Axel, and Ellen handed him some shorts. She looked at me "Are you going to shift or sleep? Your choice, darling." Man, I love-hate this witch. I shifted, and she handed Lucy her clothes.

LUCY

"Thank you, Ellen, that was remarkable. I have never felt so in sync with Astrid before. How did we never think to train in wolf form? It's just what she needed." I threw my arms around Axel and hugged him so tight. Axel pushed me behind him and questioned the rogue. I was excited and exhilarated I wasn't paying attention the dirty man in front of Axel.

"What do you want?" Axel sneered. The man looked at him, almost unable to speak.

"How, how did you do that?"

"Do what? Axel asked.

"I am human again? I haven't been in control in so long. When my mate died, my wolf took over from grief, and we've been in wolf form for so long." Ellen shot out her hand around Liam and said, "Hi! That was me, just a simple sleeping spell. He will be awake in a few hours, she explained." The man looked so sad.

"Does he have to wake up?"

"Not if you need more time, I could make you something from herbs that can keep your wolf asleep for a few days or at least weak enough he can't force a shift?" The man looked so relieved.

"Oh yes, please, can you help me? My wolf has gone feral, and I don't know how to get him back," he explained.

"I can do that for you! I might be able to help you put him to sleep longer, but I would need help from a stronger witch. I'm only half-witch."

I watched as this man who was what we thought a threat became a friend? Axel did not loosen his grip on me. He kept me tight behind him as we started walking back to Axel's Jeep. Axel whispered to me, do not tell him what you are. From what Ellen has told me about the Bennet bloodline, we can not trust just anyone. I squeezed his hand, letting him know I understood. How did I find this incredible man to always have my back?

When we got back to town, we went to the bakery to talk some more it was always quiet there this time of night. As it turned out, Kyle has been in wolf form for six months. When hunters killed his mate, he was originally from Washington state but had been wandering around and ended up in our tiny little town. His pack would be missing him. Axel offered to drive him back, but he's going to take a bus if Ellen's aunt can put his wolf to sleep for long enough for him to get help and take back control.

That night I lay in bed thinking about how everything changed in the time span of two weeks. How did my semi-simple life get so complicated? With that thought, I drifted off into a nightmare. I'm three years old I'm in my car seat my sister is next to me in her seat she is 5 I think, we are driving down the road our parents are singing weird road trip songs when lights flash, and the car is rolling, it's rolling so much I get car sick and then it's hot so hot I can't breathe. A flash of white like an explosion, and I wake up. It's not the first time I've had this dream, but the first time I felt the heat from it, I'm soaked my clothes and soaked my bed is soaked. How can one person sweat so much? I take a lukewarm shower and check the clock. It's 4 am. Well, I can go get the bread going for the day. I throw on my black leggings, a sports bra and a scoop back tank. Grab my Jean jacket and keys and head out to my car. I drive an old Nissan Sentra. I get to the bakery around half past 4. I turn on the proofer and the oven. I start making the dough for my bread and pastries for the day. I can't stop thinking about that dream. Did my sister die in the crash, too or were we separated like Ellen and Axel?