Love Me As I Am

I'm an orphan, no home, no friends, never felt love before and I have never been loved.

Although I have been told how beautiful I am when I walk on the streets, well, that was before now I am not really beautiful any more.

I never knew my parents, don't even know if I have a family, maybe they dump me in a dustbin or they lost me, really I don't know.

Been in the orphanage had been fun at first, but I was always mocked and bullied by other orphans and my mates.

The first orphanage that took me in, left me behind when we went for our trips, it was a rich orphanage, the second one I ran away from there because of their ill treatment towards me and I couldn't take it.

I just couldn't.

That day, I slept in the streets with my luggage only to wake up in the night and find out my clothes had been stolen.

Life had been unfair to me but I was happy they didn't take my novels cause I can't do without them, it calms me down.

I usually read them and listen to other people stories their famous, sad, painful story.

I got my stories from my first orphanage well, I was friendly to an old woman and she bought me books a lot of books.

When I read them, I have hope that one day it will all be over... I really hope so, I also pray a lot to God to change my predicament.

Many tragic and painful things have happened to me, I even got raped one of the the days that I was on the street, that day I cried out my heart, I cried till I feel asleep.

Why is this world so cruel and wicked.

At my age, I'm just too young to suffer like this, mommy why did you leave me.

Daddy where are you?

My country is hard and this world is beyond wicked.

I prayed to enter another orphanage before something else happen to me.

Few days later

I was walking on the streets with my black little bag...looking for some good to steal, I haven't eaten for hours an am so weak but I have to try.

I was walking pass a quiet street, and the thought of it give me goosebumps, I was about going back but unfortunately a man was blocking the place that I entered from.

"Not again." I said and ran forward.

I have seen that man before, he always follows me, he was also one of the guys who told me how beautiful I was.

I don't know what he wants me for but each time I see him I just use your remember the night I was raped, it still hunts me, mostly at night.

"Leave me alone." I ran and held my bag firmly while he trailed behind me.

His speed increased an and he got closer to me, I was really scared.

I was running and looking back too, I saw that he retreated and I faced forward to ran faster but instead bumped into a strange, mean looking, tall, weird and old lady.

And I was a little glad but still scared, if she leaves, he'll chase after me.

"What are you doing in this street?" Her cold voice rang in my head and I shivered.

"I.. I..don't know." I stuttered.

"Go home." She said.

"I don't have a home." I replied sadly.

"Where are your parents?" She asked.

"I don't know, I never knew them." I said.

"Hmm, come with me." She said and walked pass me.

"Where are we going?" I asked, but she just continued walking.

The last thing I want is for that man to have his chance to do all what God knows to me. So I quickly rushed after her and I watched as the man came out and went him way and I breath out a sigh of relief.

I'm young but am intelligent, and also a fast learner, I really really want to go to school at least I would be learning more things there.

The woman led me to a strange and expensive looking building that read "Children home", thank God, another orphanage, I would have died but God answered my prayers. We walked in and she handed me over to a strict looking lady.

"You're going to be safe here." She said, I nodded and she left.

"Follow me" The lady said strictly.

She took me to a room which had 6 beds which where arranged round the room.

They were 5 girls on each bed except one, it's probably mine.

"This is your room." The strict lady said and left.

A girl sends me a smile, "What's your name?"

It was the first time anyone every ask of my name.

"I'm Laura." I said. "What about you."

"Madison, but you can call me Maddy." she said.

"I'm Tammy." Another girl said.

"Patricia."

Cool names.

"I am Christy." She looked like the youngest in the room of girls.

They both stared at the last girl who looked like, about my age. She stood up and made her way to me.

"I'm the queen of this house, so you'll call me Queen Racheal." She said and moved her hip and I rolled my eyes.

"Did you just roll your eyes at me?"she asked.

It all seemed like a video game.

I don't know where I got the courage from.

"Yeah I did." I said fiercely.

She squinted at me. "I'll show you then." Before I know what was going on, she landed a slap on my face.

That does it.

We fought tooth and nail, while the other girls tried to seperate us, theorically speaking I gave her a hell of a beating.

When we were seperated, I saw how bruised her face and I was glad inside me.

Suddenly, the door squeaked open and the strict lady walked in holding a long whip which made me shiver.

"So, you first day here leads to a fight." She said coldly.

"No, she st... "

"Not only that, but you bruised my Rachel's face." She said and Rachel smiled.

"She even threatened me." She said.

"What?" I gasped.

If you want a threat that's what your gonna have.

"We don't th.."

"You filthy brat, you took your swim in your pride before as much you wanted, but as I'm here that stops now. And don't you ever lay a hand on me again."

"Do you know who I am?" She asked.

Like if I care.

"Yeah a bitch." I said and I heard giggle from the girls.

"I am older than you, I'm 15 and-"

"Great! We are the same age, sharing an age with you brat isn't even en-" I didn't even complete my sentence before I received some whips at my back.

* * *

I was crying on Maddy's laps after being flogged and whipped.

"What's the name of that woman?"

"Her name is Mrs Rose." She said.

She looks nothing like a rose.

"But, of course, she doesn't act like a rose." She said.

"Donn't worry, the pain will go away, very soon." Christy said.

Her cute smile, made me hold my tongue.

"Thanks guys, I appreciate it." I said.

"Even though I hardly know you all."

For the a long time in a while, I had meet people who I think I could call friends.

Laura's POV

"Laura, I think you should get something to eat." Tammy complained.

I don't know how people I just met could be so worried about me.

"I'm fine." I said, rubbing my pained back.

"You don't look fine to me." She replied.

"Miss Malike would soon come and give us our chores." Maddy said.

"Guys, maybe something is wrong with Laura. She doesn't want to get up." Christy's voice rang in my ears, making me smile.

It was the first time someone had ever been scared or worried about me.

"I'm okay, Christy." With a pained expression, I stood up. "Look, I am fine."

"Today is Saturday and each Saturday's, we do orphanage chores, after that we take our bath." Maddy explained.

"You should go and brush your teeth, I told Christy to wake you but she didn't." Tammy sent the little girl a glare.

"I didn't want to trouble her. She needs a goof rest." Christy shrugged, and made me think what kind of girl she was.

She was surely smarter than her age.

"Go easy on her please, and Christy thanks for that." She smiled at me.

"You'll brush your teeth there." Tammy pointed to the bathroom.

"There's a new tooth brush there for you already." She said, I nodded and took a glance at it and my eye caught Rachel's bed.

She hadn't been there since our fight, I still remember how her face was and I couldn't help but feel pity for her.

I am a person that finds it easy to forgive and forget.

Don't worry as my story goes on, you'll know more about me.

I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth and for the first time I saw a bathtub, the other orphanages don't have one, not even the rich one.

I felt like jumping into it at that moment.

I brushed my teeth quickly and walked out before I would do anything stupid.

"This place looks expensive." I said as I sat on my bed.

"Yeah, it is." Christy said.

"It's the Muller's Orphanage. It is expensive itself." Maddy said.

"Who is Muller." I asked.

"According to the museum, George Muller and his wife built this orphanage and it was passed on from generation to generation." Patricia said.

"And now, it's Mr Howard's turn to take care of the orphanage." Tammy said.

"Before you ask, Mr Howard is the owner of this orphanage, well, Mr George Muller is his great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great... "she choked and I smiled.

"There are a lot of great in it. His great grand father George Muller passed it on to his children and it continued like that till it reached Mr Howard's turn and after Mr Howard is Luke." Madison said.

"Yeah, Luke is so dreamy and-" Patricia got lost in her own world.

"Patricia has a huge crush on him." Christy chirped in.

I could see that.

She blushed as she asked. "Did I say that aloud?"

"You did."

"I never knew you had a crush on Luke." Maddy said.

"Neither did I." Tammy said.

"I did." Christy said. She raised her finger in the air.

"Is he that dreamy?" I asked.

"He's handsome." Tammy said.

"Sweet." Maddy said.

"Caring." Christy said.

"Loving." Patricia said.

"You'll know when you meet him." She said.

"About knowing people, what about you, tell us about yourself."

Christy giggled. "Yes, like a story."

Okay.

"I like stories."

"Us too."

"And I am an orphan, I am also fifteen, like you heard."

"What about you all?"

They weren't able to reply.

The door banged open and the girls quickly stood up, I wondered why, I couldn't see the person who opened the door because Maddy was covering me.

"Get up." Tammy whispered and I stood up immediately.

Standing up brought the clear view of the person and guess who.

It was Mrs Malika and the so called queen of the house, Rachel.

"You are all here, will the toilets clean itself." Her voice was so loud that I cringed.

"No Ma'am." They chorused while Rachael smiled.

"Get to work." She said and we scrambled out of the room with Tammy dragging me along.

"Does she always act that way?" I asked.

"You'll get use to it." She said and I shrugged.

I didn't think I would.

"We have to get our cleaning tools and get to work." Maddy said and they nodded.

She's bossy

"Patricia you're cleaning the bed room, Christy can accompany you too." Her hands made gestures as she spoke. "Laura and Tammy, you guys will take care of that bathroom."

"What is Maddy gonna do?" I asked as I cleaned the sink.

"She's gonna be cleaning Miss Milika bedroom." She said.

"What about Rachael." I asked.

"She doesn't do anything." She said.

"Wow!" I exclaimed.

"She's exclusive in our chores, that's so unfair." I said.

"Yeah, but we don't have a say." She said.

"Oh." I pouted.

Bummer.

"Oh, I just can't wait for tomorrow." She shrieked happily.

"What's gonna happen tomorrow?" I asked.

"Mr Howard is coming." She said.

"And?" I asked, cause I know there's more to it.

"He brings gifts with him." She said.

"I'm done." I said.

"Just now." She asked, surprised and I nodded.

Even though I spent half of my life on the streets, I am not lazy, there's nothing I hate more than laziness.

"I'll help you." I said getting closer to her.

"Nah I can finish it myself, thanks anyway." She smiled.

"You can go check on the others, I'll be out in a minute." She said and I nodded.

I slowly walked to the room, leaving my equipments behind.

Dang it.

Christy and Patricia already finished cleaning so I spent some time with them.

"I am done." Tammy said as she strolled out of the bathroom.

I looked at her hands and saw both my cleaning equipment and hers.

She's so nice.

Speaking from the heart.

"We should drop these, follow me." She said and trailed behind her.

"Okey dokeyi." I said and we laughed.

Where did that come out from?

"It has being long since I heard that." She said between laugher.

"We should go before Madam Madison will come and chop our head off for slacking." She said.

"But we aren't slacking." I said as she opened the door to the store room.

Were we?

"She's kinda bossy." She smiled.

"I figured that out." I smiled too.

"But she's cool." She said.

"Yeah, you're right." I smiled.

"Let's go." She said after arranging the stuffs.

I stepped out of the room and my eyes locked with a guy who was passing by.

He smiled at me.

And I must say he looked cute.

It's just a saying not that I like him or anything, I don't love guys or even get close to them since I got raped.

I don't intend to do so in future.

I stared at him and shifted my gaze to somewhere else.

"That's Gabriel, he's also an orphan." Tammy said.

"Oh, so they are also boys here?" I asked.

"Both." She said.

I had never lived in somewhere like that before.

"I didn't know." I said.

"Let me show you around." She said and dragged me to God knows where.

According to the places I saw along the way.

She took me to the entrance of the orphanage.

"Let's start here." She said and left my hand while I stared at what was in front of me.

"George Muller's Orphanage." I read. "I didn't see that when I came in."

"You only saw the children's home part, that happens to the best of us." She smiled.

"We better start going." She said and we headed into the building.

"I'm gonna try that." I said. "I also have to visit that museum of ours." I smiled.

"Do know that Bristol is so huge, you will definitely get lost." She laughed.

Just so you know, I live in Bristol, England.

"Let me tell you were you are, so that you won't get missing." She said and I rolled my eyes.

"You're in number 6 Wilson street in Bristol, in England got that." She asked.

"I know the country and city I'm from." I almost yelled.

"Just incase." She winked.

"Something has gone wrong in that head of yours." I laughed and she gave me a glare.

I'm having a great time after all.

I promise not to leave here.

Not even that brat or the wicked Miss Malika will make me leave.

"Hey asshole." A girl said behind me, but I ignored her.

Wait... I thought they don't insult.

Tammy looked back, sighed and looked away.

The girl voice did sound a bit familiar.

"Laura, I'm talking to you." She said and I immediately knew that it was that brat, Racheal.

"What is it now." I said as I turned to her.

Two girls were beside her.

And I was there feeling sorry for them.

"Shall we continue where we left off from, right here, right now."

Laura POV cont.

"Sorry, but I don't talk to brats." I said and looked away.

This girl wants to start what she can't finish.

"She's gonna chicken out." The girl at her left laughed.

"She definitely looks like a chicken." The other girl said and they laughed until Rachael used her hands to stop them.

It's like they are her minions or something.

Whatever.

"Crazy right." Tammy whispered in my ears. It tickled.

"Stop." I laughed and the girls stared at me awkwardly.

"Look if you aren't gonna say anything meaningful and out." I said and walked out on her.

"Come back here." She screamed at my back.

"Whatever." I said and we walked to our room but by the help of Tammy cause am still funding my way in this place.

"I'm exhausted." I said as I jumped on my bed.

"Seriously, just that little work." Maddy said.

"Nope, just tired from something else." I said.

"Oh." She said and went back to her talk with the girls.

"We should go have our bath, we are so nasty." Christy said.

"No way am clean, but it wouldn't hurt to take a shower." I said.

"I'll go first." Christy said as she ran into the bathroom.

"Dang it, forgot to undress." she yelled and we laughed.

"I'll go second." I said.

"Yeah, yeah." Patricia said lowly.

"Still daydreaming about Luke?" Tammy teased.

"What, no way." She yelled, her cheek got red.

"Hmmmm." We all stroked our chins, and I held back a giggle.

Am so bored

Gotta read some books.

I dipped my hand into my bag and brought out some novels.

"Wow I would love to see that." Patricia said with excitement.

"Me too." Madison said.

"Chirsty, Laura has some novels." Tammy yelled.

"What?" Christy screamed from the bathroom.

"I'll be out in a jiffy." he yelled and we laughed.

"So which one are you going to give us." Patricia asked smiling sheeply.

"Er, don't know, you'll have to choose." I said and each of them quickly pick a book.

"I'm here." Christy ran out with her towel towards me.

"Wow." I said a little scared.

"Don't ask just know that I am very serious with novels, give me one." She said.

"Choose." I said and as showed her the books.

"No." She screamed.

"What?" We asked worried.

"That's the one I wanted." She whined pointing to the book with Patricia who basically smirked at her.

"I always know the good ones." She smiled while Christy rolled her eyes.

"Let me see this one." Christy said and took a novel from me and moved to her bed.

I watched as they all followed Christy's example, they all went to their beds reading the stories at the same time.

The most surprising thing is that Christy was still with her towel tied on her chest lying on her bed reading a novel.

I guess that I am not the only novel freak.

"Christy dress up." I yelled.

"No, am good." She said.

"Christy you have to get dressed." Tammy said and Christy groaned.

"Right now." Madison said with her bossy tone.

"Fine." Christy rolled her eyes and I giggled.

She stood up and started arranging her clothes that she'll wear while reading.

Geez!!!

"Girls who's going to bath next." I asked but they all ignored me, so engrossed with their stories.

"You can go next." Maddy said.

"Okay." I said.

Don't mind me, girls. I'm just going about my business.

I quickly stood up thinking about the towel am going to use and clothes I'm gonna wear since I only have these clothes I am putting on.

"Sorry, I didn't tell you before, your towel is in the bathroom close to the door thingy that towels are." Maddy said, still reading.

"My clothes?" I asked and she looked up from the book.

"We'll handle that." They chorused and I smiled walking into the bathroom.

Minutes later...

I am done, it is bad for say that it was the best bath I have ever had in my life.

If it isn't let me say 'it was the best bath I have ever had' sincerely speaking.

I came out and the first thing I saw surprised me a lot.

"I am done." Christy and Patricia chorused.

"Wow, so fast." I said.

"Yeah." They said and stared at me awkwardly.

"What?" I asked.

"You need clothes follow me." Patricia said and I followed.

She got me to the wardrobe, like seriously I can go there by myself...

"Now get ready for a breath taking, stomach--"

"Get to the point already." Maddy groaned and I laughed.

"Bummer." She muttered and Maddy rolled her eyes.

I was still standing there with a long towel tied across my chest, but believe me when I say my leg ached me a lot..

She opened the wardrobe and behold in fr..let's just say I saw so many glittering things in my life that I can't even count or explain..

Strange right?

Am still not used to these stuffs.

My jaw fell open at the sight of these supposed beautiful things to behold.

"Wow." I blurted out.

"Yeah, I so wanted a grand opening but Madison spoilt it." She hissed.

"It is okay, I'm fine with it." I said.

"Okay, you're gonna have to choose a dress, but you'll have your own clothes soon. that is when Mr Howard comes tomorrow." Madison said.

"Cool." I smiled.

"It's all yours, your highness." Patricia smiled as she bowed a little and moved away.

Drama queen...

After staring at the dresses, lost in thought of what to wear." I still didn't get one.

"Having problems." Maddy said behind me and I flinched. She scared me.

"Yeah." I said catching my breath.

"Just take the one your hand touches, it can be a short dress or top and skirt but don't choose a long gown that's for tomorrow." She said and I nodded.

I stretched my hand to grab a dress and guess what I picked, a red jean skirt with a handless pop looking top...

"Wow." I gasp at my discovery.

"Nice choice." Maddy said and I smiled and made way to my bed.

Putting on the clothes were easy but it felt a little uncomfortable, since its new to me.

"You look gorgeous, Laura." Christy shrieked and the girls nodded.

"Thanks girls." I blushed.

For the first time ever, I blushed, wow am getting the hang of it...

"Where is Racheal?" I asked.

"You do not wanna know." Tammy said.

"She's quite right." Patricia said.

"Don't worry about her, we got your back." Maddy said.

"Thanks girls, thanks for being my friends." I said getting all teary and they stared at each other awkwardly.

"Eww!" Maddy screamed.

"That's like the grossest thing ever." Tammy said and I froze.

"What?" I asked confused.

"We can never be friends with you." Christy said.

"Yeah never, ever ever in our life not even in our after lifes." Patricia said.

Tears began to swell in my eyes and I wanted them to pour badly because I couldn't see properly and it hurts a lot...

"But why have you been nice to me?" I asked trying to hold my tears, cause I don't want them to use this as an advantage.

"Being nice to you doesn't mean that we are friends with you, Laura." Maddy said.

"Yeah, we aren't friends get that into your head." Tammy said.

Am just so dumb, how can I fall for their nice faces and attitude towards me, they are just the same type of people I ran away from.

Why why...

Being alive hurts sometimes.

"Oh my, did you think we are your friends." Patricia laughed.

"She really did." Christy said and they all laughed again falling on their beds.

I didn't notice when a tear fell from my eye, and it continued, also doing the same to my other eye.

As they laughed not staring at me or finding out if I'm heart broken or not, they just did it for fun. Like every one else...

"OMG, Laura are you crying?" Tammy said with a worried look...

They are trying to be nice again.

Screw them all...