Love Lost

Chapter One

'What's wrong?' the boy asked him, 'are you alright?'

Haru swallowed the lump in his throat, gritting his teeth as he stared at the boy who stood before him. The boy looked to be about seventeen or eighteen, the same age as Haru.

He stared back at Haru, waiting expectantly, calmly standing there with his hands in his pockets.

'Well?' the boy asked in a playful manner. 'What's wrong, cats got your tongue?'

Haru gave a small gasp, eyes widening slightly.

A memory flashed in his mind then of his mother, many years ago when he was very young.

He remembered the words she had spoken to him when Haru was afraid, or when times were difficult for him, she would help him.

It just takes one act of bravery, a single breath, a heartbeat......just say the words......

Haru drew himself up, forcing the words from his mouth.

'I'm all alone here' he began awkwardly. 'I've just transferred here, my.... f-father wanted me to go to this school.'

Haru waited for a moment, but the boy just stared back at him, blinking. After a few seconds passed, it was clear that he was waiting for Haru to continue.

'Um...I....' Haru's heart beat harder in his chest, and he fought back his nervous tears. 'I don't...know anyone in this school...I was wondering if you could...would...'

The boy continued to stare mutely, his expression passive, if not a little curious.

'I was wondering if you wanted... to be my friend...I mean...if that's ok' Haru finished, trailing off. 'I get lonely...'

A second past, and Haru's nerves failed him.

'I'm sorry' he whispered, turning to run away.

'Hey!'

Haru was jerked back suddenly as the boy grabbed his sleeve. Haru glanced around tearfully, seeing that the boy was smiling.

'I would love to be your friend' he said.

'Hu?'

'What is your name?'

Haru blinked back at him.

The boy let go of his sleeve, and Haru turned back to face him.

'Do you mean it?' Haru mumbled.

'Well sure.' He paused. 'Why are you crying?'

'I get so nervous' Haru said wiping at his eyes. 'I'm sorry...'

'There's no need to be sorry' he replied jovially. 'My name is Aubrey, what's your name?'

Haru groaned to himself.

'Well?' Aubrey asked with a teasing smile, tilting his head at him. 'What is it?'

'Um...it's...Haru.'

'You're awfully nervous, aren't you?' Aubrey smiled.

'I don't mean to be...'

'Oh no don't cry' Aubrey hastened.

'I'm not crying, I've just...got something in my eye...'

'Sure.'

Haru glanced up, watching a pair of girls walk past them in the hallway, caught up in their conversation they didn't seem to notice anything else. But Haru waited until they were gone before speaking again.

'This is all so new to me' Haru said to Aubrey glumly. 'I get scared.'

'What's there to be scared of?' Aubrey asked him casually.

Haru groaned again, looking away towards the ground. 'I get picked on a lot' Haru said shyly. 'I'm weak, I get sick a lot, and I'm shy and awkward around people.'

'Awww?'

Haru gasped then, feeling a little panicked.

'Oh no! Please don't feel bad for me!'

'You're like a little puppy that's been left out in the rain' Aubrey gleamed.

Haru hesitated, blushing slightly.

'Are... are you making fun of me?'

'Oh, not at all' Aubrey said sounding surprised.

Haru buried his face in his hands.

'I have to go' he mumbled, before turning and running away.

'Hey wait, hold on a second!' Aubrey called after him.

But Haru was already gone.

Aubrey returned to his friends shortly after that, walking at a leisurely pace down the corridor as he headed to class. It was supposed to be a revision class, but most people who went there just messed around.

'Aubrey! Finaly you jerk! Where the hell were you?'

'Sasha, keep your voice down' Aubrey tutted at his friend.

'How do you expect to pass these exams if you keep missing these revision classes?' Sasha glowered.

'Get off my back' Aubrey snapped, 'I missed one class.'

Beside Sasha, their friend Amelia began to giggle at their antics.

'You guys are always so funny' she smiled.

'So where were you?' Ben asked, approaching them, they talked outside the classroom now. 'You wanna borrow my notes Aubrey?'

Aubrey stared transfixed at the papers Ben held in his hand, but it was clear that his mind was not focused on the notes.

'What's wrong?' Ben asked.

Aubrey closed his mouth, hesitating.

'I...I talked to someone.'

'Could you be any more vague?' Sasha asked gloomily, rolling her eyes.

'There was this kid...' Aubrey mumbled, turning away and ignoring Sasha's comment, '...he looked so sad....'

It was about ten minutes or so later, and Haru was still crying. Hidden just outside the building where he had been speaking to Aubrey, he was concealed by bushes now, out of sight of anyone just passing by. He was leaning back against a tree, hugging his books to him and sobbing quietly.

He gasped then, hearing movement to his side.

'Hey I found you' Aubrey smiled down at him, 'at last. I should have known you'd be crying' he added quietly as an afterthought.

'N-no I wasn't I...!'

'I really wasn't making fun of you' Aubrey told him seriously, moving around the bush and coming to stand before him.

'Hu?'

'Come with me' Aubrey offered, holding out his hand, 'I want to introduce you to my friends.'

Haru hesitated, clutching at his chest as if his heart pained him.

'You say that you were lonely and scared' Aubrey said, 'I'll introduce you to my friends, then they will be your friends too, then you won't have to be lonely anymore, or scared. I promise most of them are not scary.'

'But...' Haru breathed, still teary eyed, 'what if they...don't like me...?'

'If they are mean to you then I will fight them' Aubrey gleamed happily.

Haru stared up at Aubrey, he couldn't help but smile a little.

'That's a funny thing to say.'

'Are you going to take my hand or what?' Aubrey asked, still holding it out, 'come on, it's getting tired.'

'Sorry...' Haru mumbled, reaching out towards him.

Aubrey grasped his hand tightly, pulling Haru to his feet.

'There, that's better' Aubrey said with a smile, 'and don't look so frightened...I'm not going to do anything bad.'

'I'm sorry' Haru murmured, quickly looking away.

He let go of Aubrey's hand.

'You really are timid aren't you?' Aubrey sighed wearily.

'I just...lack confidence...' Haru mumbled, head bowing lower. 'I...don't have any self-esteem...'

He flinched suddenly as Aubrey touched him beneath the chin, lifting his head gently.

'Look people in the eye when you talk to them' he said.

Haru blinked, the edges of his lips tweaked in a smile.

'Or else people will sense your weakness and go in for the kill' Aubrey finished happily.

Haru's smile faltered.

'Come on' Aubrey smirked, letting go of him and moving away, sticking his hands in his pockets calmly and casually as he walked away. 'I want to show off my find.'

'Hey look I found a stray!'

They were back in the revision class, everyone around them was busy at work. Ben, Sasha and Amelia all stared silently up at Haru from their seats as he stood there nervously beside Aubrey.

Sasha drew a deep breath, opening her mouth to speak.

'You shut up' Aubrey butted in before she had a chance to use her voice.

'I think he's really cute' Amelia beamed, as beside her Sasha gasped indignantly, glaring up at Aubrey.

Haru blushed furiously, balling his fists nervously at Amelia's comment.

'His name is Haru' Aubrey continued. 'His dad's an astronaut and he's spent the last eight months with his dad in space trying to build a facility so that the human race can populate the moon because earth is getting too crowded.'

'Really?' Amelia gasped in awe.

'No you idiot' Aubrey answered flatly.

Amelia began to protest loudly, and Aubrey began to argue back defensively at her.

'So, you're a transfer?' Sasha spoke to Haru asking him a very normal question.

'Um...yes' Haru replied awkwardly, hugging his books to his chest.

'What's wrong?' Sasha asked, 'are you shy?'

'Um...yeah...a little...sorry.' Haru hunched his shoulders, feeling his cheeks were hot.

'There's no need to be sorry' Sasha grinned at him, ignoring Aubrey and Amelia who continued to argue beside them. 'I bet you don't have any friends hu?'

'Don't be rude Sasha' Ben snapped suddenly. 'Sorry' he shrugged apologetically to Haru, 'I know how hard it is changing schools. My dad is in the army and we move house a lot. It's tough I know.'

'You've...changed schools like that?' Haru mumbled.

Ben smiled warmly at him. 'We can be friends if you like.'

'Thank you' Haru flushed. 'I um...'

He groaned, bowing his head.

'Uh-oh' Aubrey gasped, turning away from Amelia then and clapping his hand over Haru's eyes. 'It's ok' Aubrey laughed awkwardly. 'If you don't see the tears it means he's not crying.'

'What are you doing?' Sasha protested. 'Get off him you jerk! He's not crying!'

She pulled Aubrey's arm away sharply then, gasping and drawing back at she saw that Haru really was crying.

'I'm sorry...' Haru whispered, brushing his tears away. 'I...'

Aubrey's arm shot out then, grabbing Haru by the sleeve.

'Don't run away again' Aubrey ordered, and Haru stared back at him wide eyed. 'If you run away...' Aubrey hisses dramatically, 'if you give into fear...............then the terrorist win.'

'Jerk!' Sasha snapped, leaping up and smacking him over the head with her book as Amelia moved over to Haru to comfort him, shielding him from the mayhem as Sasha began to verbally assault Aubrey.

'Girls...' Aubrey uttered in exaggerated pain when all of it was over, 'are so violent these days....'

They settled down quickly, having drawn attention from the rest of the revision class for their mayhem.

'I know it looks like we're all crazy' Ben waved at Haru smiling awkwardly, 'but we're actually really nice.'

'I know it's hard' Amelia was saying to him. 'Ben was really shy when he first came here.'

'He was?' Haru asked tentatively.

'Yeah' Ben replied sheepishly, scratching the back of his head.

'He's really come out of his shell' Amelia said to Haru. 'Ben and I have been friends the longest. I was going through a hard time and...Ben didn't know anyone back then...we sort of connected...you know?'

'Um...yeah...' Haru laughed awkwardly at her, smiling then. 'Thank you, you're very kind.'

'Why don't you sit with us?' Amelia suggested. 'Do you want a drink from the vending machines or something? I'll get you something. What would you like?'

'Oh no I couldn't' Haru began to protest.

'Don't be silly' Amelia giggled, smacking his shoulder lightly. 'I want to get you something. Don't upset me. That's what friends do for each other, they help each other, now...'

Amelia pulled back a chair, dragged Haru over to it and forced him down into the seat.

'What would you like from the vending machine?'

Haru blinked up at Amelia in wide-eyed confusion.

'Um...' he struggled to find his voice, 'just...juice...orange.... please...'

'Great!' Amelia cried happily. 'Back in a jiffy!'

Ben leant on the table, resting his chin on his palm as he watched Amelia go.

'You can relax you know' he said to Haru. 'You're so tense.'

'Sorry' Haru mumbled.

'And stop apologising for everything.'

'So...' Haru stopped himself.

Ben smiled at him happily. 'It will get easier, trust me. You've got us now. Will you two shut up?!' he snapped at Sasha and Aubrey who had been arguing. 'I can barely hear myself think!'

Haru hunched his shoulders then, giggling into his hand.

'What's so funny?' Aubrey grumbled at him, the front of his shirt balled up in Sasha's fists as she held him there.

'It's nothing...you guys are just...so weird...'

'Well at least you're smiling now' Aubrey said, prising Sasha's hands off his shirt. 'It means you're beginning to relax.'

Amelia returned a short time later with a carton of orange juice, handing it to Haru who took it from her tentatively.

'Thank you very much' Haru mumbled shyly.

'It's ok' Amelia waved merrily at him. 'If you ever want a favour, don't hesitate to ask, that's what friends do for each other, right?'

'R-right' Haru answered quickly, clutching the carton to his chest.

Amelia immediately struck up a conversation with Sasha, as Ben and Aubrey began to speak together.

Haru bowed his head smiling then, feeling a little more at ease.

'What do you think Haru?'

'Hu?' he tensed slightly, glancing back wide-eyed at Aubrey.

'Jeez you're not spacing out are you? Stay with the program will ya?'

'Oh yes' Haru fumbled, smiling awkwardly. 'I will.'

'You don't know what I was talking about do you?' Aubrey said to him, giving him a tired expression.

'I'm sorry' Haru laughed nervously, 'could you repeat that again please?'

It was a few hours later when the small group left the revision class. Sasha, Amelia and Ben went on their own way, and Aubrey stayed with Haru.

'So are you alright then?' Aubrey asked Haru out of the blue.

'Why...I mean...sure I'm fine...?'

'I just want to make sure you're ok' Aubrey tilted his head, regarding Haru closely. 'I want to make sure the others aren't too much for you...you're like a frightened little mouse you know?'

'I'm not a mouse' Haru scowled at him sullenly.

'It's alright' Aubrey replied with a smirk, strolling past him, 'I'm just teasing. So what class are you in?'

'Class C' Haru replied.

'I'm in D' Aubrey said, 'it kinda suck, all my friends are in different classes. The only time I really get to see them is in break and during our club-time, or revision class.'

'Club time?'

'Yeah, we all have a drama club together. Are you in any clubs?'

'No' Haru bowed his head glumly.

'You should stop around some time and see what we're up to' Aubrey smirked. 'It's a lot of fun.'

'It is?'

'We should both probably be getting back to our dorms now, you know what the teachers get like if they catch us wandering around too late...what room are you in?'

'Um...thirty-three...'

'And who do you share a room with?'

'I don't know right now' Haru answered, 'he's home due to a family situation...or so I heard...'

'Aww. That's too bad' Aubrey said turning and heading the other direction. 'Gotta go now. See ya!'

Haru watched him saunter away, walking with confidence. Haru felt a twinge of jealously and resentment at that.

'Sure...' he mumbled after him, speaking now to the air, '...see you...'

Chapter Two

The next day after the morning classes were finished, Haru sat upon a stone wall on the edge of the grounds. It was a raised platform built in a circle, the flower bed behind him was filled with colour, and a small tree hung over him, its branches drooping.

He sat alone in silence, staring down at his carton of juice.

In the distance he could hear other people with their friends, laughing as they enjoyed each other's company. There was another group nearby playing with a Frisbee, throwing it back and forth. They all sounded very happy.

Haru let out a sigh, bowing his head further. He squeezed the carton of juice lightly, fiddling absent mindedly with the little white straw at the top.

He heard movement then, seeing something out of the corner of his eye.

He turned, giving a start at the sight of the figure, hooded and cloaked all in black, the figure sidled up beside him.

'Haru...' the figure spoke in a foreboding and dramatic voice, face hidden completely by the low hood. 'Meet me in the drama hall in five minutes.'

Haru stared back at the figure in shock, eyes wide and mouth open.

'....Aubrey?'

'Don't be late' Aubrey said rising to his feet and gliding dramatically backwards, slipping around a corner and out of sight.

Haru stared after him a little confused, wondering what that was all about. He looked ahead again, straightening up and quickly finishing his carton before putting the rubbish in his bag. He made his way across the grounds, heading to the drama hall, following Aubrey's path.

'Hey you made it!' Aubrey called out happily as Haru let the doors swing gently shut behind him.

Aubrey stood there wearing the same cloak but now with the hood lowered, and he watched as Haru stood there at a distance looking nervous.

'Come child' Aubrey spoke reaching a hand out to him, 'there is nothing to be afraid of young one...you are safe with me.'

'W-what's going on?' Haru mumbled, stepping closer, seeing the others in the hall, Amelia and Sasha and Ben, they were carrying stuff around and unpacking boxes of costumes.

'We're holding a little play' Aubrey told him playfully, clutching at his own chest, balling the dark fabric up in his hands. 'I'm naked underneath you know.'

'What?'

'Just kidding!' Aubrey gleamed, smacking Haru playfully on the shoulder a little too hard.

Haru straightened up, rubbing his shoulder and frowning nervously as Aubrey walked away from him, talking to the others.

'Will you hurry up?! Is this going to take all day?'

'Be quiet!' Sasha instantly snapped back at him. 'I don't see you helping!'

'I'm carrying this cloak' Aubrey answered curtly, indicating the cloak he was wearing, and saying so as if he were doing a wonderful thing.

'Oh, hey Haru, it's good to see you' Sasha said ignoring Aubrey now.

She put the box she was carrying down.

'Aubrey was talking so long I thought he'd never find you' Sasha said.

'Why...' Haru asked nervously, 'why do you want to find me?'

'We want to show you our play' Sasha grinned excitedly.

'We're putting on a play' Amelia said to him, sitting upon a seat a short distance away, beginning to unpack the box before her.

'And it's going to be so much fun' Ben added, sifting through his own box he had carried out from the store room. 'We did something like this last year and it was a real blast.' He straightened up, putting his hands on his hips. 'Have you been in a play before?' he asked Haru.

'Oh' Haru replied, 'um...no...I haven't.'

'Maybe you should try it' Ben suggested. 'It's really fun once you get into it. Though at first it's a little nerve wracking.'

Haru blushed slightly as he stared back at Ben, a short distance away Aubrey still wearing his cloak, glanced back at them.

'I.....' Haru began, 'I've never been in a play before.... I'm too nervous...I get awkward around people I don't know.... and I get awkward in new situations.'

Ben fell silent then as the others continued with what they were doing, rummaging through boxes unpacking props, continuing to listen to their discussion.

'Why don't you join us in the play?' Ben offered suddenly.

'Hey that's a great idea!' Sasha cried out suddenly. 'Why don't you do that?'

'Oh no' Haru fumbled. 'I'm no good at that sort of thing.'

'It would help you make friends' Aubrey spoke up, 'and build your confidence. I think it would be good for you.'

Haru stared back at Aubrey, for a moment lost for words.

'Come on' Aubrey prompted. 'We would love to have you on our team, it will be fun. We're still working on the play so we can fit you in easy.'

Haru pursed his lips, blushing slightly, he swallowed the lump in his throat.

'Ok' he breathed.