LOVING BECKY

💕LOVING

BECKY💕

Chapter 1

The long strands of her hair fell to her waist like silky flames as she threw her head back, and I watched, enchanted as her mouth opened wildly, a lilting laughter escaping her luscious lips.

After her mirth had died down, she glared at me, her lips lifted in mock reproach as she brushed strands of her hair away from her face. "Come on, his jokes aren't that bad. And at least he tries." She mused, a smile playing on her lips.

I only rolled my eyes. The guy she was talking about had a horrible sense of humor and his jokes were flat-out not funny, but it seemed Becky was the only one who didn't see it that way.

"Besides," She continued, adding some blush to her cheeks. "His jokes aren't what pulls me to him. It's his face, David. Whenever I'm with him, its like there's only the two of us. Excitement creeps in, butterflies fly inside my tummy and my heart beats so fast."

Whenever I'm with you, Becky, it's like there's only the two of us. Excitement creeps in, butterflies fly inside my belly and my heart beats so fast, I thought, feeling a sharp twinge of pain in my heart.

But of course I couldn't dare to tell her all that. Instead, I said, "This is like the fifth time in five months you're saying the same thing about five different guys."

Hell, I didn't mean to sound so sarcastic, but when would she say the same things about me?

Becky stiffened, turning to look at me, a frown forming on her lips. "Seriously? Are you really going to rub that in my face now, David?"

"Hey sorry, I didn't mean it that way." I apologized, rubbing a hand through my hair, trying to regain some control over my emotions.

I loved talking to my best friend, but in times like this when all she could talk about was how much she liked this guy and how good a kisser this guy was, I wanted to be anywhere but with her.

But I always endured the heart ache, listening as she rumbled on and on about how much she liked this guy or that guy. I was always hopeful whenever her relationships ended because it meant I stood a chance, only to have my heart shattered into pieces whenever she told me she'd met another guy. It was like a never ending cycle.

"I should be going." Becky said, standing up and picking her purse. "How do I look?"

"The usual." I told her, and by 'the usual' I meant gloriously beautiful, her sea blue eyes glimmering.

Adorned in a white tank top topped on a pair of snug denim jeans, she was a woman dressed to seduce. It hurt to the know she hadn't gone through all that effort for me.

"Alright, I hope your night turns out fine." Of course I wished for exactly the opposite.

She kissed me on the cheek before walking off, and I felt desire burn through my scalp as I stared after her. Such an innocent act and it had such an effect on me.

Escorting her to the door, I closed it after she left. Grabbing a bottle of cold beer, I returned to the living room to watch TV, needing to replace the flaming images of her with another man my mind was intent on conjuring.

The thought of Tom holding her close, hugging her, kissing her - it made me burn with a hopeless jealousy.

Becky and I had been friends for virtually all our lives because our parents had been close friends and next door neighbours. I don't know when exactly my feelings for her undergone a transformation, but with time, I begun to crave her in ways that defied the rules of friendship.

The day I realized what I felt for her was love, she'd returned from California after spending half a month there. I'd missed her badly, and I'd been quite eager to see her.

I'd hugged her too hard, she'd thrown her head back and laughed too hard, excitement had crept into my belly too hard, my heart had pounded against my chest too hard, and I realized I'd fallen for her, a little too hard.

I'd been about to reveal my feelings to her when she beat me to it, announcing she'd arrived with her boyfriend.

I remember sitting there frozen, my heart sinking, disbelief churning through me while she went on and on about how much she loved this guy, expecting me to be happy for her.

"Hey, David are you even listening to me?" She'd enquired, tugging on my arm and snapping me out of my shock.

"Of course I am." I'd lied, regaining control of my senses. I couldn't even say my next words in a way that suited my intentions. "You know I love you right?"

She'd frozen for a bit, and then a smile had broken on her lips. "Of course, and you know I love you too. You're like a brother to me, my 'bestest' friend. We're soulmates."

It'd been painfully obvious she hadn't read the real meaning behind my words, and I'd been too disheartened to clarify it to her. But it became painfully apparent that the love she felt for me was the kind for a brother.

My observation was proven even more correct a few weeks later when my sister, Ella, found out about my feelings for Becky and left my room one day threatening to expose me after we'd had a fight. I'd been paralyzed with fear, but when Ella returned, she told me she'd only asked Becky what would happen if I told her I was in love with her.

Becky had laughed and called the idea ridiculous, the possibility nonexistent. But after some insistence, she finally answered that that could destroy our friendship since she only saw me as a brother.

Becky and I had later laughed about how 'ridiculous' Ella's question was, and I'd sworn to myself to forever keep my feelings a secret.

Sighing as I polished off my beer, I got up and made to grab another one.

All that happened 5 years ago. It'd been 5 long years and Becky still didn't know about my feelings for her.

And she would never know, because I was never going to tell her. I was content with having her near yet loving her so much from afar.

It was better than destroying our friendship.

💕LOVING

BECKY 💕

Chapter 2

I didn't know I'd fallen asleep in the couch until midnight when several rings of the doorbell woke me up. From the way the rings came in quick succession I figured the person was desperate.

Stretching as I stood up, I went to the door, looking through the peephole. Becky stood there, a sad look on her face. The sight made me open the door immediately, worry instantly filling my chest.

"Becky? Why are you here? I thought you and Alex would be-" fucking each other's brains out "- having a good time."

She suddenly hugged me, and I hissed at the scrumptious weight of her body against mine, only to be assailed by worry when I realized she'd begun crying.

"Becky, what's wrong?" I brushed my hand through her hair, feeling very worried. "What happened? What did that jerk do to you?" Was it natural that I jumped to my conclusions quite too quickly?

"He already had a girlfriend, David." She blurted out, raising her head from my chest to look at me. "While we were at the bar, a woman tried to attack me, claiming I was the whore trying to steal her boyfriend. The jerk couldn't even deny it."

"Damn idiot." I muttered gritting my teeth so hard I feared they would shatter.

Here I was, hoping against hope that she would notice me one day. Heavens knew what I wouldn't give for her to see me in a different, much more intimate light than friendship. He had been lucky enough to get that chance and he couldn't even appreciate it.

Anger zinged through my veins. "That guy is going to hear from me!"

Turning, I had every intention of storming off, prepared to pummel the scumbag to a pulp, but my love stopped me with her gentle but firm touch. "No, David. Don't fight him. He's not worth it." She held me by the shoulder, and I reluctantly turned to face her. "I'm just glad I didn't get too deep into this thing."

She placed her hand on my chest, so unaware of the effect it had on me. It was all it took for my dick to harden immediately. "Hey, you won't fight him, okay?" She said, almost like a command.

Chuckling softly, I led her into the house and closed the door. "Fine. I'm glad you think he's not worth it because he isn't." She didn't have to know I was planning on beating up the guy later anyways.

A few steps away from the door, she paused and I did too. "What's wrong?"

"Why am I so unlucky in love? Why do none of my relationships really work out, David? Am I ever going to find the man for me?" Tears had begin to pool in her eyes, and unable to stand the sight of it, I pulled her into a hug.

I wanted to tell her that she could stop looking, that I was right in front of her and she could find that man in me. I would never take her for granted like the other guys had done, and I would never play her like Alex had been planning to do.

I would love and cherish her until my last breath if only she would give me a chance.

"Becky..." I whispered her name.

She pulled back from my arms and looked into my eyes. I think in that moment, she saw all the emotions I had bottled up inside me, those I dreaded to express, because she seemed startled for a bit.

Our lips drew closer, my heart careening loudly against my ribcage. I didn't know what to make of the emotion I saw in her eyes, but at least she wasn't pushing me away, and she gazed at my lips as it neared hers, our breaths heated, until finally, our lips touched for the first time.

Five seconds - that was how long I got to feel her delectable lips against mine, perhaps even less. Before I could kiss her properly, she nudged me and stepped away, Her eyes were wide with shock, as if she couldn't bring herself to wrap her head around the last five seconds.The regret in her eyes squeezed at my heart even though I hadn't expected anything more or less.

"Oh my goodness. David... I'm so... I don't know what came over me. I..."

While she rumbled on and on about being sorry for the kiss, I finally blurted out the 3 curtailed words of my heart before I could lose the nerve. "I love you. "

Becky went on for a while before freezing and gaping at me. "What?"

"I said I love you." I answered, fear of her rejection coiling around me. "Not as a friend. But as a man loves a woman."

"What are you saying?"

"I can't hold it back anymore, Becky. I love you, I love you with all my heart." I don't know what came over me in that moment, but I felt like I'd been dismantled from the pedestal of my control.

"I don't know how or when exactly I begun to feel this way, but I've felt very strongly for you for a long time. Whenever I see you..."

"Cut it! Cut the crap!" Her expression basked in shock. "We're friends, best friends. We're supposed to be like siblings. You can't be feeling that way about me!"

I held her hand desperate for her understanding. "I know, Becky. Believe me if these feelings had asked for my consent before engraving themselves in my heart I would've sent them packing. But love doesn't ask for consent. Believe me I tried to fight it when it started building to no avail. I can't control it anymore. Please give me a chance to prove that I can be the man for you. I promise to make you the happiest..."

"Stop saying that!" She snatched her hand from mine, stepping even further away like I burned her. "This can't be happening. So John was right when he said you were in love with me. You'd called his assumption stupid, but he was right all along. That's why you never seemed to like any of my boyfriends."

She said it like an accusation.

"I never told you this because I didn't want to destroy our friendship. You made it clear you only loved me as a brother so I decided to keep my mouth shut. Now that you know how I feel, I hope you and I can..."

"Nothing! David, you're like a..."

"I'm tired of being friendzoned!" I shouted without meaning to, the pain of experiencing unrequited love first hand driving me crazy. "I want to be more than a friend, more than someone you regard like a brother. Becky, I want to be your man."

"No, no, no. This is too much." She raked her hand through her ginger red hair, an act which at first would infuse me with desire now only serving to heighten my despondency. "I'm not prepared for this. I'm not. This is too much."

With that, she opened the door and stormed out, shutting it after her. I stood there transfixed. How could I have been so stupid? Why the hell did I allow my emotions to get the better of me to force me to tell her how I felt? She'd been visibly upset by my confession.

Slamming my fist against the wall, I was too anxious to register the pain. I needed to do damage control quickly. But I couldn't help it -the feeling that no matter what I did to make things better, one thing was for sure.

That our friendship was never going to be the same again.

💕LOVING

BECKY💕

Chapter 3

"Oh my God! I can't believe you finally gathered the balls to confess your feelings to Becky." Ella exclaimed, her expression basking in excitement as if that was the most awesome thing I'd ever done. "That's the most awesome thing you've done in a long time!"

See? I rolled my eyes.

"Awesome? Really, Ella?" I scoffed as I slumped onto my bed, sighing loudly. "That's the stupidest thing I've done all my life."

"You mean apart from showing your dick to your class when you were in grade 2 just to impress them?"

The memory created by a seven years old me made me cringe. That moment was probably the second most urgent on my hierarchy of 'want to unlive."

"Ella, that's besides the point." I mused, throwing her a reproachful glare for reminding me of such an embarrassing moment of my life. "Becky won't talk to me anymore. She's never at home and she won't answer my calls or texts."

Shrugging, Ella bit into the delicious-looking apple she was holding. "It's her loss. You are a gorgeous guy and an awesome man. If you weren't my brother and I were in love with you, I would marry you in a heartbeat. She's the one losing if she doesn't accept the love you have to offer."

Ella's words could be flattering to any guy, but it wasn't easy to believe in them when the woman you loved detested your love for her so much that she didn't want to see you.

It'd been three days since the night Becky and I had kissed, and she'd been avoiding me like plague. I didn't know if she still needed time to noodle over things or she was planning to continue this hide and seek thing forever.

Sitting up on the bed, I carefully snatched the apple from Ella and quickly bit into it, knowing well she wouldn't take it back. Ella would share anything but her food. She'd rather you have it all if you were being insistent.

Fruity goodness exploded on my tongue, and I moaned, winking at her while she glared at me.

"Tbere're a lot of them downstairs." She whined, sulking with a mock angry expression. "Why didn't you go for one."

Shrugging insouciantly, I gave her a smug smile. "This one looked more tasty." I bit into the apple again and chewed.

"Hey, bro, I have an idea." She said, and I pecked my ears, knowing whatever this idea was, I wasn't going to like it. "Why don't we go clubbing at the Jay. It'll help relieve your stress and get your mind of things for a while."

For a while - that was exactly the problem.

Jay was a club well known for it's wild nightlife, and though I knew I needed a distraction because my situation with Becky had messed up my head so much that even concentrating at work had become a chore I was finding hard to undertake, I wasn't a fun of finding temporary solutions.

I especially didn't like the part where the high wears off and all your problems come crashing down on you.

I was about to protest when Ella waved a warning finger in my face. "I'm not taking no for an answer."

When Ella was being obstinate, it was seldom she allowed her mind to be changed, so I knew I would have no luck if I argued with her, especially when she took my hand and begun dragging me out of the room.

***~***

"Will you wipe that look off your face. Jeez, you look like you're watching your own funeral." Ella grimaced, sliding into the stool beside mine at the counter after returning from the dancefloor.

We were at The Jay and it was exactly as I remembered from my four months break; wild and crazy. But what got me frowning was a guy trying to get all touchy-feely with my sister who didn't seem to take it as a big deal even though she rejected his advances.

Yeah, I felt in my protective brother mood.

I glanced at Ella as she ordered a shot of vodka. "You know you should tell those guys when they're doing something you are not liking." I mused, pointing my bottle of beer towards the dancefloor.

"Oh that?" She gulped down her drink, waving her hands dismissively. "It's a norm. We're in a club, remember?"

Being in a club doesn't mean you've applied to get touchy-feely, I thought but said nothing.

Ella ordered another shot and turned to me. "Don't tell me you only came here to drink beer? Come on, get your boring ass on the dancefloor."

"No thanks. I'm fine right here." I declined, drinking from my bottle.

Ella snorted, rolling her eyes. "Such a bore." Gulping down her shot of vodka, she slid from her stool and zoomed off into the dancing bodies.

"I'll pay for her." I told the bartender when he looked after her like he wanted to call her back, receiving a smile in return.

I polished off my beer, trying hard not to think of Becky but failing hard. I wondered if she missed me like I did her. Obviously she didn't. The thought panged my chest with sadness.

Ella returned a few minutes later with a girl I hadn't seen before. "Bro, this is Lexi. She's been my best friend since freshman year in uni."

"Hello there, handsome." Lexi said, her voice smooth but loud over the blaring music with a sultry touch to it.

Instinctively, I knew this was my little sister trying to play match maker. The little cunning girl. She'd ventured into the fray of writhing bodies before I could glare at her, but I couldn't be rude to my acquaintance.

"Hey there, Lexi." I returned, trying to mimic the tone she'd used.

"So you are the famous David." She mused, sitting on the stool beside mine and swivelling so she was facing me.

"Famous?" I asked, beckoning the barman to get me another bottle of beer. I turned to her. "Want anything?"

"Beer." She replied. "You know Ella won't stop talking in school about having a brother who's even more awesome and handsome than her boyfriend."

"My sister has a boyfriend?" That was news to me. I made a mental note to talk to her about it later.

Something like regret flashed on her face before she chose to ignore my question. "Now I see why she won't stop bragging."

I quirked a brow at her connotation, and I studied the woman in front of me for the first time. She was a stunning woman with a marshmallow skin colour and black hair, adorned in a tank top that showed the lower parts of her flat stomach, and snug jeans that hugged her impressive curves.

She had lips that displayed a wealth of erotic potential, and the dimness of the room made her gray eyes shimmer like jewels. I knew she probably wouldn't say it but she'd like to do more than just talking, perhaps dancing. "Hey, would you like to dance?"

"Of course." I told the barguy to take back the drinks for the time being when he placed them on the counter. I held Lexi's hand and we went to the dancefloor, rocking ourselves to the rock song playing.

I wasn't a fabulous dancer, not to mention I barely got the chance to practice my dance skills, but I managed to articulate the moves I knew somehow perfectly.

Lexi wowed, and I rolled my eyes. Her dancing was a whole lot better than mine. After a while of dancing, teaching each other the moves the other didn't know, and laughing heartily, I asked her if she wanted to talk and led her to the counter when she accepted.

She told me Lexi was just the short form of her name, Alexa, and we talked for a bit about our lives - the parts that weren't too personal to discuss with someone you've just met. I don't remember exactly when the conversation steered into relationships, but I was soon asking her the type of men she liked.

"I like those muscular ones with tousled dirty blonde hair, piercing green eyes, and create lasting impressions on their sisters." Lexi answered, staring pointedly at me, and I realized her description unerringly fit me.

I wasn't one to flinch under the female gaze, so I met her gaze unflinchingly and smiled. "Well I like women with piercing blue eyes and ginger red hair." I didn't even know why I said that.

"Hmm. I don't know why but that sounds oddly specific." She observed correctly, reclining a little on the edge of the stool. "Poor me. It seems I don't stand a chance."

I was caught a little off guard by her straightforwardness but I realized I liked and was attracted to her candor. Frankness was something I'd lacked in my relationship with Becky, and that was what had caused me to suffer through years of my once unspoken love.

And after months of celibacy, the sensuality about this woman was enough to stir my libido. Standing up from my stool, I placed both hands on either side of hers, gazing into her eyes. "I do make exceptions sometimes though."

"Do you?" She asked, bringing her face even more closer to mine. "Then how much will you make an exception with me on a scale of 1–10?"

"Don't actions speak louder than words?" I asked her and with that, captured her lips with mine.