Held Against My Will

Brenda's (POV)

"Thank you, Tiffany, for coming shopping with me."

"It's always fun shopping for lingerie, and Brenda, I think you are going to blow that man of yours mind tonight."

"You think so?"

"I know so. Keep me posted on how everything turns out. No details. Girl, I can't handle details right now since I'm manless."

"Tiffany, you won't be manless long. You are so pretty with a fab body and not to mention you're amazing personality."

"Keep talking, girl, so true." We both laughed. "Look, Brenda. I have to return to work before my helpless, dependent boss has a fit. If I'm one second late, he throws a tantrum. We'll talk later. Have fun tonight! Bye!

*****

I arrived early before Boston came home from work, ready to surprise him with all my sexy treats. Thirty minutes later, I heard the door open. I quickly got ready to surprise him. First, I sat up and leaned against the headboard, posing for him sexily. Then, I heard Boston put his keys on the table at the front door. My heart was pounding as Boston's footsteps entered his flat.

(narration)

Boston was disappointed as he walked toward his bedroom undoing his tie, pausing, and thinking. "I'm no quitter. If my career is over, then I have to face it. But I will fight, doing whatever it takes to save it."

Little did Boston know that his lady Brenda had come to his apartment to satisfy her insatiable appetite for him. They hadn't been intimate in the past three weeks. Whenever Brenda came by, she would find Boston sitting behind his desk, pouring all his attention into his work. But not tonight. He was going to be all hers. Brenda felt her skin tingling and tightening expectantly, craving the greedy reverence of Boston's touch. (end of narration)

I waited and waited for him to enter his bedroom. It took me a minute to realize he was going in the opposite direction of the bedroom. After a while, I threw on my robe when he didn't appear before me. I knew where he would be, the same place he had been, Sitting behind his desk in his office. This is the place he has been for the past few months.

I knocked lightly on the door, "Boston, are you coming to bed?" I got no response, so I opened the door. I peek my head into his office and see Boston on the phone. His face looked pinched, which, lately, was a usual expression.

He hung up the phone. "What is it, Boston?" I asked, concerned.

Boston sighed heavily, "Ralph is having a tough time in the States. We are having major financial issues. We're bleeding money, and he can't determine where the losses are coming from or why they are happening."

He continues to go on to relate to me. "I need to work late tonight, and first thing in the morning, I'm going to take a flight out of here and head to Chicago. But, first, I must see if Ralph and I can determine what's happening."

"Another trip to Chicago? It seems like that's where you live lately more than in London. How long will you be gone this time?" I asked, sexually frustrated, pouting.

"I'm sorry, Brenda, but I must handle this immediately. I don't know how long I will be away, but I promise I'll work hard to come home soon. You do understand, don't you?"

"Umm, sure I do," I said, disgruntled, as I flipped my long blonde hair to one side, leaving the room. My stomach instantly sank as I shut and leaned against the bedroom door. I took off my sexy nightie, dressed, and left Boston's flat. While driving home, tears came to my eyes. Then I got angry! I realized I was the only one working my butt off in this relationship. And with all my work, I can't ignite my fiance's flames or get him burning for me. All my efforts were going nowhere in this sexless and loveless union! So finally, I need to get to the bottom of the problem in this relationship. I know there's only one way I will get the answers I need from Boston. That is to put him front and center where he has nowhere to run to or dodge the questions my aching heart and body deserve and need from him!

Six months Later: The Unforgettable Engagement Dinner

It had been a glorious night for the two families: the Halstons and Kincaids. The engagement dinner with over 200 guests was all having a fantastic night. A night full of romance, especially when Boston got down on one knee and asked Brenda to marry him. You could feel the love in the air as the night promised so much for two financial Giants, the Kincaids and Halston. Now it was more than a mega business merger. They would all soon become family.

The guest heard someone clinking against the glassware.

"May I have everyone's attention? Especially you, sweetheart. Can you come and take a seat." Brenda Halston calls her fiance' the handsome Boston Kincaid. "Please, can our family members take a seat also?"

Once everyone was seated. Brenda smiled and said what no one expected.

"Family and friends, I have an announcement to make. Then she looks at Boston and flat-outstate. "I can't marry you. I'm sorry, mom and dad, the Kincaids, but I can't go through with this engagement."

The sighs and gasps from everyone present were harmonious.

"Boston jerked his head toward his fiancee Brenda, who stood there without emotion in her eyes. He took in her appearance. She was one of those women who never left the house unless she was well put together, and tonight for their engagement party, she looked exceptional. But he didn't like seeing the stress lines across her forehead. It was like she was irritated, fed up with him!

Boston's mother had gone out of her way to ensure they stayed together. She even sent Brenda on a plane to see Boston in America while he was handling business.

"Boston! What have you done?" His mother asked hysterically.

"Mom, this is not the time. I will speak with you later."

"Boston! Please fix it. Fix it now! She's the perfect girl for you! "

"Yes, mom, could you please sit down!" Boston said with his gaze on Brenda as she smirked, looking at him getting attacked in front of everyone. It was as if she was enjoying the scene she had caused tonight."

The groom-to-be father stood next to his mother in front of the ballroom.

"Boston, don't forget I'm watching, and you know I will ruin you, boy! A deal is a deal!

"I'll get back to you on that, dad. I understand-no need for anyone to get alarmed. Everything is good. Just let me straighten this out!"

"Boston, I will only give you a few days to convince my daughter to reconsider you. If not, the deal is off, Mr. Kincaid! Your son has cost you millions and millions of dollars!" Mr. Halston says Brenda's father.

"Okay, okay! Please, everyone! Stop wheeling and dealing! Let me take care of this!" Boston shouted.

Sighing, he wiped his hand over his mouth and chin before returning his attention to Brenda' Walking over to Brenda's side of the table. Digging deep within himself for patients.

"Honey, tell me what this is all about, Brenda?" He draped his arm over her shoulders, guiding her toward the exit. But she stopped walking, taking a seat in the ballroom with everyone's eyes on the two of them.

Brenda sat down, looking at her captivated audience of family members and close friends.

"Boston, I thought I could do this, but I can't marry you. I can't be with a man who isn't in love with me."

Boston sat down next to Brenda and asked. "What are you talking about, honey? We've known each other for a solid year. You know I love you. I wouldn't have asked you to marry me if I didn't."

Frustrated, Brenda let her shoulders droop as the reflective lines on her forehead reappeared. Finally, she sat back on the padded bench crossing her legs.

"I'm not saying that you don't love me. I know you do and love you, too, but we both know you're not in love with me."

Instead of denying her comment, Boston asked, "Where is this coming from?" Looking confused. In the back of his mind, all he could think about was his business venture going down the drain.

"Boston, I have always felt something was missing, especially since you moved to the States. But I thought I didn't know what I thought. After dating for one year and six months, I was initially excited when you asked me to marry you. We were finally taking our relationship to the next level. But lately, I've had my doubts. Before making our engagement public, you wouldn't agree to set a wedding date. It's clear you're not ready."

Boston sat forward, his elbow on his knees, staring at the floor. Too afraid to look into the room full of eyes on him. When he asked Brenda to be his wife, the next logical step was to get his investment money from his father. But he couldn't bring himself to set a date. So instead, he wondered if it was worth being locked down in a loveless marriage for good.

"Boston, I have a question."

"Yes, Brenda, what is it?"

"Why did you ask me to marry you, Boston? Tell everyone and our families why you proposed to me."

Tonight was her time to have Boston Kincaid's undivided attention finally. Brenda stood in the center of the floor with all eyes on her, looking like a vision. Her green eyes were deep like the forest, and her black diamond earrings contrasted against her engagement dress. Her shoulders were small and rounded, and her chest was voluptuous. She elegantly held her glass of champagne in her hand. As she continued speaking, you couldn't hear a pin drop in the room with over five hundred guests.

"What changed, Boston? For years, you claimed you weren't ready for marriage, and then suddenly, six months ago, you popped the question. Why?"

Brenda's father, Mr. Halston, looked at Boston's father, Mr. Kincaid, wondering if his daughter was discussing something else. But, of course, it was common knowledge that the merger was why the kids were marrying one another. It was an arranged marriage that everyone agreed upon willingly or unwillingly it suppose to take place.

Boston glanced at her, nervously smiling, thinking fast on his feet. "Brenda, my dear, everyone knows that we are great together. You are the perfect partner for me. You're lovely, witty, funny, and the best business partner any man can have. You know how to work a room. Isn't that evident, everybody?" Boston said as everyone laughed with him agreeing.

"Baby, you are good for business, get along great with all my friends and family, and can handle all the necessary social functions that are required. Look at our engagement party here tonight. Everyone give Brenda a hand for how lovely everything has turned out!" Boston says as the guest cheers for Brenda.

"Everyone, when we went from friends to lovers, Brenda made it clear that she wanted to marry and have a family one day. But then, I had a change of heart. Brenda, baby, you changed me. And now, here we are, ready to start our family and life together."

"Yes! Yes, Son!" His mother shouted.

Brenda moved closer, slipped her arm through his, and rested her head against Boston's shoulder. "Those are good reasons, but you didn't include the most important thing. Love."

"I didn't think I had to mention that we wouldn't be standing here trying to convince you to accept my sincere engagement," Boston replied, smiling at Brenda.

"But you're not in love with me, Boston. I can feel it when you make love to me."

Everyone gasped! "Oh no!"

Boston hung his head and became embarrassingly quiet. What could he say? If he had to be honest with himself, she was right. There was a part of himself and his heart that no other could ever claim. But he kept telling himself it was time to move on and think about his future. Brenda continued speaking.

"Most engaged people can't keep their hands off each other. Isn't that true, everyone?" She asked all those in attendance.

They smiled. "Yes." Most replied.

"Well, that hasn't been my experience. I've been here with you for the last couple of months and these past few weeks. And what have you been doing, Boston? Tell everyone! You have been traveling, and you have been emotionally unavailable, even when you are home. So what am I supposed to think? You found every excuse to keep me at bay. Yet, I wake up thinking about you, and you're the person I think about before I fall asleep at night." Brenda sighed heavily.

"Poor girl, she's in love." Someone said aloud in the crowd.

"But I feel I'm not the one who consumes your thoughts. Boston, I need more than a polite man trying to do right by me."

After all, Boston Kincaid had been through this past year. It took him a while to feel normal again. But, with the help of his best friend Ralph, he was finally able to get back on his feet and start his own business. But he needed the capital from his father so that his company could flourish.

And his father was the only person he knew could quickly get the money he needed to keep his dream from going bankrupt. But his dad wouldn't just give him the money. No, Boston had to make a deal with his dad. And that deal meant he must be willing to marry Mr. Halston's daughter.

So, the only option was to get married; that way, everyone would have everything they wanted, except for Boston, who wished for a marriage full of love and babies created out of love. But he was willing to sacrifice being in love and settle for someone he liked. Boston thought he could pull this off.

He'd already let Brenda Halston get this close, a miracle. But Boston knew there was hesitation, and so did Brenda, despite not being ready to settle down with her and have a family. He didn't want to hurt her. It wasn't her fault. But if he goes headlong with these marriage plans, that would happen.

"Brenda, I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything. You're an amazing guy Boston, and I appreciate your willingness to give up your singleness to give me the life I've dreamed of, but it won't work. But you're going to make someone a wonderful husband."

"Wait! What is she saying?" Mr. Kincaid asked, looking at Brenda's father. He only shook his head in disappointment.

She placed her hand on Boston's muscular thigh as his gaze went to that spot. But he felt nothing. No tingling. No sparks. No sensation from her touch. Nothing!

Brenda was beautiful, especially her inner person. Maybe he hadn't touched her intimately since she lived here in Chicago. But, like her, Boston recognized something had been missing. So he just chose to ignore it.

"We were good friends before we got engaged. Brenda said, interrupting his thoughts. I hope we can remain friends."

Boston said. "Always."

"No! Son! Tell her you to want to be her husband, not her friend!" His mother demanded.

"My daughter is no fool, you know! She doesn't want him!" Mrs. Halston says to Mrs. Kincaid.

Despite the two families yelling back and forth, Boston placed a lingering kiss on her forehead; he was not surprised at how well she was taking all of this. Unlike other girls he's dated, she was calm and independent, low-key. But this was very different for her to do a break-up so public.

Maybe I deserved it. Brenda reached him, the sparkling diamond ring he had given her. Boston thought, well, here goes my future.

He wanted a huge business and a house one day to fill with children with a woman he fell head over heels for, but now he will be penniless and all alone.

Boston folded her hand around the ring and pulled her to him. "I'm sorry for everything. But, if ever you need anything, you know all you have to do is call me."

"I know. But there's something Boston I have to know."

"Humm... what's that?"

"Who is she?"

Boston leaned away from her and frowned. "Who is who?"

When the crowd thought it was all over, they were shocked again! Everybody's ears perked up, and eyes expanded directly on Boston and Brenda.

"You have suppressed issues you have never dealt with, and I can't help but think they have something to do with a woman in your past. Talk to me. I can..."

"Look, Brenda." He pulled away from the light hold she had on his arm.

"The last thing I need right now is for you to try fixing me." He has been doing enough of that himself, especially over this year.

"Who is she, Boston?!" Brenda sat unfazed by his outburst and the family looking on. "Who is this woman that has your heart?"

If Boston wouldn't tell her, she was going to find out. But, even if she couldn't have Boston, he was the man she had wanted to marry, so she thought he owed her that much.

Boston stood suddenly and walked away, heading for the exit door as quickly as possible. Sure, he wasn't the man he was six months ago. But then, a stranger, a woman, entered his life like a star, making him spark, glow, and feel things he'd never felt. But then, suddenly, everything he touched was taken away against his will!

At the start of every day, Boston's first thought was always the same-her warm and naked body, soft as she sleeps in his arms. The scent of her shampoo, the expensive stuff he bought for her that she loves, surrounds him. He would recognize that scent anywhere, the smell of his woman. His body responds predictably to her nearness. Any time he's awake and naked with her, he's hard and ready to claim her. Boston moves his hand from her flat belly to cup an entire breast, toying with the nipple that awakens instantly to his touch.

Wanting to see and watch her reactions, he opens his eyes and is shocked by reality. Every painful morning. He's not in bed with her. He's alone in the room he calls home that doesn't feel like home anymore. The woman he loves beyond reason, to the point of craving and desiring to return any hour, minute, and second. To leave behind memories that torture him.

Then only three months ago, he saw her again! It stirred up all those feelings and memories, he was changed, and the night he entered her life, they both were changed forever!

Boston POV

It all started months ago after only living in Chicago for a few months. That's when my life was changed forever!

"Wow! Boston, I'm so happy to have you in Chicago with me! Did I mention that to you already?" Raphael says, smiling at me as my friend and right-hand man, who I sent here in advance to open up our new office and hire a team of architects and designers.

"Yes, Raphael. You did mention it, but it doesn't hurt to hear again." I teased him.

"Well, I'll repeat, my friend, so you won't forget how valuable you are around here," Raphael exclaims, laughing, putting his arms around my shoulders.

"I'm still trying to adjust, Raphael. Things are so different here in Chicago. Do you know how often I've gotten lost this week alone trying to get to this office?"

"I know! Don't you love it?! You discover something new each time. Of course, navigating the streets of Chicago can be tricky, especially as a visitor or if you just moved here, but you'll catch on. Oh, by the way, how does your mother feel about living here? I didn't tell you to bring your mother with you." Raphael looks at me, shaking my head.

"Well, you know my mom. She followed me here to teach my dad a lesson and show him how much he needed her. But, Raphael, you know my mom is a control freak. So now all her attention is focused on me. But I finally caught a break when I convinced her to move into her place two days ago."

Raphael chuckles, "Good for you, Boston! So what am I hearing about you returning to a relationship with Brenda again? Is that true?"

"Well, I thought last year when she moved here that it was over, that it would be the end of it. But now that I'm living here. Her parents and mom, you know, they're relentless. So I couldn't tell her or them no, so we are sought of a couple."

Raphael shook his head again. "See, I left my people back home in New York. I didn't move way to Chicago to go through the same things I would go through back home. I came here to experience the freedom of being single! How will you experience any freedom living with your momma following you around? Then you get rid of Brenda, and now you are back with her!"

"Don't ask. I know it doesn't make any sense."

"I suggest you come clean and tell your parents you don't want this arrangement. Tell your father to merge with another business that doesn't have a daughter."

I look, and Raphael furrows his brows. "I wish it was that simple. Brenda and I argue for more than we have sex. But I'm about to change that. I think she's just waiting for me to propose to her. Things will get better between us once I take the big step. Right?"

"Well, I hope that works out for you, buddy. I do. But honesty is always the best policy."

Several months later, at my apartment:

"So you're leaving me just like that?"

"Yes, Boston, I need my space. You need your space. You know you don't love me!"

"Don't say that! I care for you deeply and would never think of leaving you despite not being in love, but I do love you."

"We both know your loyalty is to a fault. It used to be cute, but now how loyal you are is disgusting! It's not a good enough reason anymore. So please, just let me go."

"Is this permanent or what, Brenda?" Boston asked, standing by the front door, hoping she wanted to leave.

As usual, I got no answer. Finally, Brenda opened the door, picked up her Loui Vuitton bags, and left me there. I looked down the hallway as I watched her go. Then I got aggravated at how many light bulbs were blown out in the hallway ceiling.

"What's up with this superintendent of this building!" I said, frustrated, as I pulled out my cell phone calling the manager's office to report maintenance again about replacing those light bulbs.

"You barely could see your hand in front of your face! It's so dark in that hallway."

A few days later, at work:

I tried my hardest to focus on meeting with my business partner Raphael and my employees. But my relationship with Brenda was becoming harder and harder to define, especially now that they were separated.

Despite our troubles looming, I felt I could still call her my girlfriend. I thought about calling her and taking her to dinner to discuss their future. "Hmm...that would make her happy."

Two days later, I discovered it had the opposite effect on her. She told me she needed time to think about our relationship.

It's been a month since Brenda moved out of the apartment, and now she's staying at a friend's place. But neither had officially ended the relationship, even though we weren't together.

Raphael calls out my name as they sit in the conference room. "Boston...Boston!"

"Yes, what is it?"

"Is there anything you'd like to add before I conclude this portion of the presentation?"

Raphael asked, looking a little worried because I was his friend. Raphael was a true friend, and I was my only friend here in Chicago. We've been friends since we were in college together. There was no one I trusted more than Raphael. He was also the chief financial officer of this new budding fashion graphic design business. I needed to shake this feeling that was starting to consume me and focus on the task at hand; the vision of the department here in Chicago for the coming fiscal year.

I stood up from the conference table and said, "Raphael, as usual, you've managed to paint the financial picture very well. So we can conclude the meeting here, everyone."

The staff of five left the conference room. Raphael didn't leave the conference room with the others during the meeting. He could sense that something was bothering me. So I remained, not knowing whether it was business related or personal.

"What happened in there? Are you okay?" Raphael asked.