Hearts on Ice

"I'm sorry dad... I'm sorry!" he screamed louder. The words barely came out of his small mouth, as he tripped over. His fists trembled against the cold floor.

"I didn't mean to! I'll do better!" He cried out. "I swear I'll do better!"

Another vicious whip tore against his back making him cry louder. Blood ran across his head to his back, his arms and everywhere at once, until he couldn't tell where one strike ended and the next began. His vision blurred as tears ran uncontrollably... he curled into himself, trying to make his body smaller... maybe it'll end all the pain.

"Useless!"

The voice was harsh and familiar. It echoed louder than the pain he had taken.

"Good for nothing!"

"I'm trying..." he choked, voice shaking. "I'm trying, please-"

Another hit. He flinched violently, a scream ripping through him.

"I'll be better! I'll be better, I promise! Please don't-"

"You should have died instead of your mother!"

Another hit tore the peace, the words were cold and final.

He squeezed his eyes shut and pressing his forehead to his hands as if that alone could make it all end.

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I'm sorry..."

Then Lukas jolted up.

His chest rose and fell rapidly, almost desperate for life. Sweat and tears ran down his face as if he'd been running and for a moment, he didn't move or blink. He just stared at the ceiling, letting the silence settle. Then he exhaled slowly,

"...not this damn nightmare again."

His voice was hoarse, barely above a whisper. It was the same dream... over and over, never changing.

He dragged a hand over his hair, pushing himself to sit on the bed. The room was dim and the faint morning light slipping through the curtains, soft and calm, a great irony compared to what he'd just seen.

Or rather... remembered.

He didn't think about it too long. He never did.

Dropping his legs over the side of the bed, he stood and stretched slightly, already pushing the remains of the dream away. There was no use holding onto it and no use trying to make sense of something he couldn't even fully see anymore.

And that was the strangest part... he couldn't remember their faces anymore... not clearly at least. And no matter how hard he tried, they were always blurred like shadows just out of reach.

But their voices? Those stayed in his head. Clear and sharp.

He paused for a second, fingers tightening slightly at his side. "...tch."

He turned away and headed to the bathroom... there was no point thinking about them. Not anymore.

*****

By the time Lukas stepped onto campus, he looked like a totally different person. Composed and sharp. No one knew about his struggles... no one but him and even he disappeared.

Students passed by him in clusters, voices low but curious, eyes following him for just a second too long.

"That's him, right?"

"Yeah... Reiner."

"Top of the class again..."

"And ice hockey captain too? That's insane."

He ignored all of it with no effort, just like he always did.

His expression never changed, his pace still steady as he moved through the halls without sparing anyone a glance. His books in hand, posture straight, everything about him screamed control and something close to perfection.

If anyone tried to greet him, he'd respond with a nod at most. No lingering conversations, no unnecessary interactions.

Lectures came and went.

Lukas sat through them all, taking notes, answering questions when called upon, his voice calm and precise. On paper, it was effortless. The kind of student professors relied on for every lecture but his mind wasn't entirely there today... it kept drifting.

Fragments of the dream still lingered, slipping in between words and lectures. Not the images though, they were already fading, but the feeling remained... Heavy and unsettling.

He tried briefly to picture them again, his parents, to remember what they looked like but once again... nothing. Just voices and a headache that stung.

"You're useless."

His pen paused slightly against the page.

"...forget it. It's enough."

He continued writing... putting all his focus to the professor.

By evening, the air had cooled, putting him at ease a bit. The rink lights cut through the dark surroundings, glowing bright against the ice as Lukas stepped inside. The familiar chill wrapped around him instantly, grounding him in a way nothing else was. This was where everything made sense... where he made sense, this was his promise.

The moment his skates hit the ice, something in him settled. He moved smoothly, effortlessly, slicing through the surface with practiced ease.

He was fast and controlled. Every turn, every shift of weight was perfect... just like he presented himself to be. Utter perfection.

Others were already training, but the energy shifted slightly the moment he joined. It was subtle but still noticeable.

Everyone knew who he was. Not just the captain or the top student, he was the best player in the entire league and no one questioned or challenged it. And it was simply because no one could match him.

Practice continued under his direction even before the coach arrived.

"Your timing's off."

Lukas didn't raise his voice, but it carried weight anyway.

"So fix it."

The player nodded quickly, adjusting. It was another mistake and another correction. Everything was familiar.

Until-

"Alright, that's enough."

The coach's voice cut in, drawing everyone's attention.

Lukas slowed, turning just slightly as the rest of the team gathered. He didn't think much of it at first... it was normal for new recruits to be introduced mid-season.

But something about the coach's tone felt... deliberate.

"We've got a new addition!" he laughed. "He's a natural! Says he's been training since 14! He might be as good as Lukas," and that's what got his attention. Murmurs spread lightly through the group but Lukas barely reacted, resting one hand against his stick as he looked on, his expression was still neutral.

Then the coach stepped aside.

"Viktor Volkov."

The name hit first... sharp and familiar. The name of the one who abandoned him. Lukas's fingers tightened slightly around his stick and for the first time, he almost lost composure.

"No...It can't-" he spoke under his breath.

Then he looked up and his entire world had stopped. For a split second, his vision narrowed... sound fading, movement slowing as his eyes landed on the figure stepping onto the ice.

Tall, slim and composed. He looked different and yet the same. His breath caught and just for a moment, disbelief flickered across his face before he could stop it, something raw and unguarded breaking through the calmness he held so tightly.

Because standing there was someone he hadn't seen in years, someone he had convinced himself he'd only meet again at the top, someone who abandoned him without a word... and somehow, that someone was already here.

The silence didn't sit for long before it shattered. Lukas moved first, not thinking or anything. His body just reacted before his mind could catch up, skates cutting sharply against the ice as he pushed forward.

His eyes held an expression none had seen. A few of the players turned, confused, but by the time it clicked-

He was already standing before him.

Viktor didn't have time to react... he just stepped forward, lifting his hand to do a proper introduction, his expression calm and polite.

"Hi...I'm Viktor Vol-"

BAM!

The punch landed before he could finish. It was clean and strong. Viktor's eyes widened in horror as his nose leaked blood and his body lost balance, falling against the ice.

For a split second, no one moved, like everyone had forgotten how to react.

Then it hit everyone at once.

"What the hell?!"

"Lukas!! Are you crazy?!"

"Hey-HEY!"

Lukas couldn't care less about any of it because all he could focus on was him... in the flesh, back... after all these years just... smiling there like nothing happened.

Lukas took another step forward. He wasn't done with him, not even close.

"You think you can just-"

He didn't reach him before hands grabbed him, strong grips pulling him back.

"Reiner, stop!"

"Are you trying to get suspended?!"

"Let go of me!" Lukas fought, his voice low but sharp enough to cut through the noise. They didn't listen. It took more effort than it should have, more strength than they expected, because Lukas didn't only resist, he fought it... his eyes still locked on Viktor like if he let go of him at that moment, he would disappear again.

Viktor lifted himself up and wiped the corner of his mouth. Seeing blood, his fingers shook as his eyes quivered in horror. For the first time since stepping onto the ice, his expression changed. He was not calm or polite anymore.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" he snapped, his voice soaked with anger.

And that did it. Lukas moved again, sharper this time, more reckless. It didn't matter that people were holding him back... he still tried and still pushed forward like something in him refused to let this go of what he said.

Then-

"REINER!"

The coach's voice cut through everything.

Loud and firm. It wasn't just a call... it was a command and Lukas stopped not because he wanted to, but because despite everything, he respected authority.

The tension didn't seem to ease... If anything, it shifted because now, Viktor had gone still too. He wasn't looking at the others anymore. He was looking directly at Lukas, properly this time.

The name lingered in the air, and something about it felt... familiar?

"Reiner...," he mumbled, quieter now, like he was testing it and a memory flashed in his head. A small boy kneeling, wearing a green shirt "Hi I'm Lukas Reiner" and a smile plastered on his white bruised face.

Lukas heard him repeat it. Of course he did and for a brief second, something flickered across his face... not anger, Well, not completely at least but before Viktor could read it, it disappeared just as quickly as it came.

He pulled himself free from the others, stepping back like he needed space, like he needed to put distance between them before something else slips and he says something he can't take back.

The rink stayed quiet.

The coach exhaled sharply, already very irritated.

"What the hell was that supposed to be?" he asked, looking straight at Lukas.

Lukas didn't answer or even glance at him. His attention had already shifted away like Viktor wasn't even there anymore.

The coach clenched his fists in anger and released almost immediately. "We'll deal with that later. For now-" he gestured toward Viktor, "you'll be training under Reiner."

And that got a reaction immediately.

"No," Lukas said, turning back, his voice firm.

At the same time, Viktor spoke too, just as sharp.

"Not happening."

The coach didn't even blink.

"It's not up for discussion."

Lukas let out a short, humorless laugh, running a hand through his hair as he looked away briefly before facing him again.

"With all due respect, coach, I'm not training him."

"You're the captain," the coach replied. "You will."

"I said I won't!" His voice slightly higher.

"And I said it's final!"

The conversation ended there not because Lukas agreed, but because he knew it wouldn't change anything. Still, the look of hate he sent Viktor was enough. Viktor maintained his gaze for a moment, unreadable, before letting out a quiet scoff. He tilted his head slightly, then spat to the side, dismissive.

He turned and walked off like none of this meant anything to him.

The rest of the day felt off. Lukas sat through his classes like he always did, pen moving across paper, posture straight and attention forward but nothing really stayed. The words blurred together in his head, voices faded into the background, and no matter how much he tried to focus, his mind kept pulling him back. To that moment... to him.

He tightened his grip on his pen slightly, eyes watery as he forced himself to keep writing.

'Why now?'

'Why show up now, after everything?'

'After disappearing like that?'

He exhaled slowly, leaning back just slightly as the lecture continued around him.

It didn't make sense... none of this did but by the time classes ended, Lukas didn't go straight back to class. He needed air, space... anything. He needed to be anywhere else just not there so he sprinted his way up to the balcony overlooking the entire campus, the quiet up there was a sharp contrast to the noise in his head.

The evening air was cooler, brushing lightly against his skin as he stepped forward, resting his arms against the railing.

For a moment, he just stood there... thinking or trying to.

His thoughts kept circling the same thing over and over again. The name, the face, the voice, how did he not notice him before? Was he new? A transfer? How long had he been around? And why didn't he-

Lukas screamed into the evening sky, his voice rough and deep. He made up his mind, he wasn't not asking... he wasn't doing that.

Lukas pushed himself off the railing, turning to leave when he heard it.

"Lukas."

He froze. The way his name sounded, It wasn't like how the coach said it or anyone else... only the person who he loved dearly many years ago called him like that.

Slowly, he turned and Viktor stood a few steps away, hands in his pockets, watching him. Not angry and not exactly calm either... just looking and for the first time since the rink, Lukas didn't know what to do.

Lukas didn't say anything, he simply avoided eye contact and sighed deeply. He looked at the place Viktor was resting and Viktor had started moving closer.

"What's up with you? Huh? Lukas!"

He dived right to it with no hesitation and Lukas let out a quiet breath, turning fully now to face him but almost backed down. The resemblance was worse. It wasn't just his face, it was in the way he stood and the way he pouted at him like he expected something... like a child. He kept acting like they were close and that irritated him more than anything else he had done since he joined the team.

"What's your problem?!" Lukas shot back, the wind blowing up his hair. "Why are you talking like that?"

Viktor frowned. "Like what?!"

"Like we're friends!"

The word hit him like the punch he received to the face and there was a brief pause as Viktor studied him for a second, like he was trying to understand what exactly set him off, but Lukas didn't give him the chance to.

"Whatever you think you're doing," Lukas continued, voice steady, "it's not working, get lost."

Viktor didn't interrupt or argue, he just listened.

"Our relationship," Lukas went on. "Starts and ends on the ice. I'm your trainer and you're my trainee, that's it."

The words were clean and he didn't leave space for anything else. Then, almost like respect, he added, "If you'd excuse me." And turned away.

He didn't want to stay there any longer... and he didn't want to keep looking at the face who left him in the dark alone. It was easier to keep things simple.

He had already taken a few steps when-

"I'm sorry."

Lukas stopped just for a second. It wasn't loud or dramatic .If anything, it was so quiet in a way that didn't match Viktor at all.

Lukas didn't turn back or respond... but something in his head reacted anyway before he kept walking.

Training started that same day and Lukas made sure to keep things exactly the way he said they would be. Strictly professional and nothing more.

Viktor didn't complain. If anything, he adapted faster than expected, picking up on instructions without much repetition. He was already good... Lukas could tell that much. There were little things he needed to fix.

But Lukas didn't take it easy on him.

"Your stance is off!" he said at one point, circling him slightly. "You're putting too much weight on your right side!"

Viktor adjusted immediately without a word.

"Better," Lukas muttered, though his tone didn't carry praise.

At another point, Lukas stepped in closer, reaching out to correct his posture himself. His hand pressed briefly against Viktor's shoulder, guiding it back into place, then down along his arm to adjust his grip.

The contact was brief and cold, nothing underneath. Well at least, that's what Lukas told himself and Viktor didn't react much to it, but there was a slight pause in his movement every time Lukas touched him, like he enjoyed it... even when he pretended he didn't.

The sessions continued like that. Day after day. Short instructions, minimal conversation and no unnecessary interaction. Lukas kept his distance as much as he could and Viktor just watched.

****

Weeks passed but nothing changed or at least, that's how it looked from outside Lukas' head.

Lukas stayed consistent and Viktor stopped trying to push conversations, settling into the routine instead.

One evening after training, Lukas finished training and moved his bag on the edge of the ice, his movements practiced and precise. The others had already left, their voices fading down the hallway, leaving him behind while Viktor was still there

Of course he was.

He had been saying something about practice, about adjustments, about improving his timing but Lukas paid no attention to him. He gave short responses when necessary, but nothing that encouraged the conversation to go further.

Eventually, he zipped up his bag and slung it over his shoulder.

"Reiner!" Viktor called out and Lukas ignored him, continuing to walk toward the exit without looking back.

"Lukas!"

And that made him pause but not fully. Just enough to turn his head slightly.

"What?" he asked, impatient and he barely saw it coming. Viktor closed the space in a few quick steps, tiptoed and kissed him!

He leaned in slightly and then it deepened as a grunt slipped out of Lukas' mouth as he pulled Viktor's waist.

Viktor's hands trailed down his back and just like that he ended it, pulling back like nothing happened, like it didn't mean anything, like the most normal thing in the world had just happened.

He didn't wait for a reaction or say a word, he just turned and walked out of the room. Leaving Lukas exactly where he was.

Lukas' mind couldn't catch up immediately and couldn't process it the way it should have. All he could feel was the faint reminder that his lips were once pressed against Viktor's and his arms grabbed him like a rare gem. His fingers tightened slightly around the strap of his bag.

"...what the hell?"

The words came out under his breath, quiet and disbelieving because nothing that had happened in these past weeks made any sense.