Falling: with no love to give

She smelled like an open garden, on a hot summer day. With her curly afro that bounced on her shoulders when she walked. She has grown up to be the most beautiful creature to ever walk my pack lands.

Her petite features making her appear almost fragile, almost, that is until I stare at the bite mark on my wrist. That little bunny had bit me when we were kids while she had a river of tears rolling down her then plump anch chubby cheeks. I almost smile at the memory, i stood on my tippy toes with my arm in the air with her favourite plush toy in my hand while I dangled it around. I had and evil smirk on my face while I watched her jump and kick trying to get it. As her last resort, with a fire burning in her already red eyes she jumped catching me off guard and catching my wrist in the process.

The little shit had bit down with all her might and stayed stuck on my arm like a tattoo no matter how hard I tried to pull. Her new profound strength was something I planned on asking her about later on if I lived for another second that is, because right then her screams had magically travelled to my mother's ears and she came like a raging forest fire through the doors of the pack house and out the backyard.

"What in goddess' name is happening here?" Her green almond eyes zeroed to my now bleeding wrist to the still hysteric girl that now sat on the floor with her favourite plush toy next to her, except it's head now hung loose and a few loose cotton balls and threads lay around.

Mother's eyes widened, almost comical. "Kian Siro Blackwood, what on mother earth have you done to your sister?." She roared, her Luna tone evident in her sentence.

She's not my sister, I wanted to shout. I am the one who's bleeding, I wanted to add but I knew better. I was raised better- scratch that, I was trained better. I furrow my brows looking at my still bleeding wrist, why is it not healing. I was a wolf and had alpha blood running through my veins.

"Shush now child, it's okay. Let's go bake your favourite macaroons." Mother whispered in her ear, loud enough for me to hear and before they turned to leave she said, "your father is waiting for you in the training fields Siro. Don't keep him waiting."

I wanted to run after her and scream my lungs out that I'm sorry, I'm sorry for bullying my 'sister', that I'd do anything not to go to training with father. I wanted to tell her that I really didn't mean to bully their precious angel, I really didn't know how to play with other kids and the only time I got to play and be a kid was when I was bullying my so called sister.

But words failed me, the words that were supposed to come out of my mouth went straight to my heart instead and hardened it.

With a last look on their retreating figures I scowled and turned on my heel heading for the training fields, already knowing that I was late, I was was mentally prepared for my punishment.

Three whips to my back.

Who does that to their twelve year old son?

Father.

"Your Highness, the brides will arrive tomorrow at dawn." Daniel the head warrior says with a bow. Mother nods and flicks her hand motioning him to leave. Daniel or Danny as I call him is a huge wereman, he easily stands at six feet with arms that matches the trunks of the trees that surrounded the royal grounds. I was the only one allowed to call him Danny and he called me little fairy, the prisoners in the royal dungeons called him Azazel, the angel of death. He had eyes that glowed like the rays of the sun in the morning, ready to burn everything in its wake.

"Are you not hungry darling?" Mother says looking at my full plate of breakfast. I smile and shake my head, "I am Ma, see..." I say shoving some scrambled eggs in my mouth with a fork and she forces a smile while giving me a look that says she knows I'm lying.

Honestly, I don't really have an appetite,heck, I haven't had an appetite in years. Mother always complained that my mate wouldn't like a boney girl for a mate and I must eat to gain weight and curves and all. I laughed in her face when she said that. I don't want to be curvy or thick or whatever most girls wanted to look like this days. I loved my body, although most of the girls in the pack had made sure to make fun of me everyday but I tried not to take it to heart, Lordess knows it's too full to take anything else.

"Well then remember to take your vitamins." Mother says before she excuses herself and two maids rush to clear her plates and another accompany her to the ballroom. The vitamins she talks of, I stopped taking them when I was sixteen.

"Would you like something different miss?" Octavia, a young maid asks and I immediately nod my head yes. "Coco pops please, fill the bowl" I whisper sliding the plate to her and winking. Octavia smiles taking a sausage off the plate and shoving it in her mouth. I stifle an unlady-like laugh that threatens to come out and I shoo her away to get my coco pops before someone sees that I didn't have the greasy breakfast that mother wanted me to eat.

In a second Octavia comes back with the delicious milky goodness in a bowl filled to the brim and I resist the urge to just kiss the girl, I settle for huge toothy grin instead.

"You're lucky I like you." She whispers producing another sausage under her apron and biting hard before noding at it and strolling away.

Silly girl.

I don't waste any more time and grab the huge tablespoon next to the bowl, scooping a large amount of coco pops and milk I wet my lips before opening my mouth wide and shoving the spoon in.

I am so engrossed in my yummy breakfast that I don't notice the other presence in the room, except the royal guards.

His eyes are the darkest shade of black I've ever seen. They are like the place where sinners go after death, a dark abyss waiting to swallow you whole. He stands tall, taller than Danny or anyone else in the pack, taller than the former alpha himself. If he wasn't my brother I would call him a Greek sex god, but that's just nasty.

Our eyes meet and many memories flash through my brains, one memory sticks out from the rest. It's of Kian's eyes on his eighteenth birthday.

We were at the clearing where most of the outdoor royal parties were held. The pack was quiet staring at the sport where their young alpha had shifted for the first time and disappeared off too. The moon hung over us like a huge lantern and through my peripheral I could visibly see Charlotte shaking in excitement waiting for Kian to comeback and claim her as his and make her his Luna and royal Queen mother of all werewolves.

He came like lightening from the forest, chest glistening in the moonlight, his short hanging low on his hips making the young she wolves crazy.

I squinted my eyes watching Charlotte step forward from her group of pack whores and dusting imaginary dust from her short silk dress. The whole pack wore white. I had nothing against the girl but she's a huge OT and she irritated me to no end, from the "hey adopted bitch" to the "hey non royal" she would mutter everytime we came accross each other. She made my skin prickle in a very uncomfortable way.

Suddenly Kian's steps falter and we all watch as he sniffs the air once, twice and he gave out a disapproving growl. As if what he was sensing was toying with his senses he went again sniffing the air like the wild dog he is and he shook his head wildly. I watched in awe as his eyes changed to golden slits that could make lava jealous.

When his wolf's eyes met mine I smiled, waving towards him. I was standing next to mother and she suddenly clutched my hand in a tight hold looking at his son dead in the eyes as if reading his mind, her lips parted and she drew a small breath in. I furrow my brows in confusion, my eyes finding Kian's again and he took one last glance at me and turned in full speed, shifting mid air and bolted for the forest.

The look on Charlotte's face would forever be iconic but I guess we shared the same look because to say I was confused was a major understatement. Wasn't he supposed to come back for his alpha ceremony and blood bond with the pack?

Mother said there was something Kian needed to do at the caves, a ritual of some sort. She told everyone to enjoy the party and plan for Kian's alpha ceremony the following day.

That was the day Kian Blackwood stopped talking to me.

I had ran a thousand reasons in my head everyday of what I could have done to get the silent treatment but my mind always came back blank. I remember the morning before his birthday. I had woken up so excited for him, I ran to his room with nothing but my pajamas on and had jumped on his bed until he woke up and chased me to the kitchen where we had breakfast as a family, him, mother and I.

I won't lie, Kian wasn't the talker, but he did talk whenever I provoked him until he couldn't keep quiet anymore. "Shut up, stupid little bunny." He would roar, little did he know that he amused me to no end. He roared like a hungry lion searching for prey and I would go the whole day mimicking his roar while walking behind him to wherever I wasn't invited. After all he was my Kiki.

That was the last breakfast we had as a family. The following morning, Kian had his alpha ceremony and after that all things went South. Mother stopped cooking us breakfast and let the maids do their job for once. She then started to appear sickly and pale and to say Kian didn't care was a major understatement. He acted like everything was okay and mother was fine and he ignored me like I had the plaque.

I remember barging in his office one day, fed up with the silent treatment and the secrets him and mother were obviously keeping. Only to find him three inches down Charlotte's throat.

I was fuming, probably the only time I got so angry that my chest started doing that weird tingle thing it does when my emotions are high.

"You, get out!" I had screamed pointing at a red Charlotte. She had scurried out of that office like her tail was set on fire.

"You can't barge into my office and start yelling orders like you own the place!" Kian roared and I resisted the urge to suck my teeth in distaste..

"Enough about you Alpha. What is it with you this days. You were crowned alpha and suddenly your family was the last thing on your mind. Mother is sick Kian, I don't care if you don't talk to me, you don't need to, but your own mother? You are pathetic. Instead of hiring the best doctors in the world for her here you are trying to contact a newly discovered STD. You should be ashamed of yourself!."

I didn't give him time to answer. I said what I had to say and he heard it, now it was up to him. But oh goddess, imagine my surprise when I had Charlotte's bitchy moan from his office five minutes after I talked to him.

From that day onwards, as if I was the one with the STD, alpha Kian Blackwood made sure that our paths didn't even meet. I wasn't even sure we stayed in the same house anymore.

That was three years ago, now Kian Blackwood had to choose a bride. Since he didn't find his mate at eighteen, five virgin alpha daughters from the other packs were coming to the Royal pack tomorrow, here, and I bet my dear brother was over joyed to deflower each and everyone of them.

I can't wait to lock myself in my room for the next five days.

"Good morning Kiki, fancy seeing you this morning." I say with my mouth full of coco pops and my chin dripping milk that had turned brown due to the cocoey goodness, Lordess was that even a word?.

I see Kian's face scrunch up in distaste probably due to my appearance and unlady like table manners and I resist the urge to burst out laughing. Who cares? He's the one who disturbed me.

"Octavia if you are done shoving royal food down your little throat, I would like some breakfast." Kian says drawing out the chair where mother sat earlier.

What the... Since when did he start eating at the dining hall?. Also, "hey Octavia is mine, don't order her around." I say this time with a clean mouth. I wasn't lying, Octavia was my maid, mother assigned her to tend to me and only me. Now this maid thief had come and disturb dear Octavia from having her meal-that I was supposed to be eating- and then order her around.

"This is my house I can do whatever the fuck I want." Kian growls his black orbs turning darker. "Since when do you talk?." I ask in a bored tone rolling my eyes.

"Since I had to teach grown woman table manners, didn't your mother teach you not to speak with food in your mouth bunny?." Kian replies with a deadly tone that would make the commander of the the royal army run for the hills, but I'm not the commander of the royal army, I dont even know how to pack a fist.

Before I could answer him Octavia comes scurrying in with a trolley filled with different kinds of food. He was still a foodie!. When Octavia turns to leave I stand up too, ready to burry my head in another good book from the library.

"Jokes on you Alpha, I never met my mother but since you do have one, didn't she teach you to be nicer to the ladies?" I hum as I pass by him.

I hear the cutlery fall behind me and turn to find bent forks on the floor. Is he mad, those were expensive golden cutlery!. Oh well, he has tones of money to buy the whole world, who cares?.

Five minutes later I'm strolling towards the library watching the servants rush by, carrying all different types of flashy materials used for house decor. Kian's brides would stay on royal grounds for five days. In these five days they would undergo different tests and on the fifth evening Kian would choose the strongest and compatible girl to be the next Luna of Royal pack and queen of all werewolves. These girls were bred since birth to be chosens once they are grown. You don't just become a chosen.

I can't wait to meet my future sister in law and annoy her like I do my brother.

Did I mention I would be turning eighteen and shifting into my wolf in six days? To say I was excited would be a major understatement. I can't wait to find my mate either and rub it in Kian's face, the boy failed to find his afterall.

"My my, what do we have here?" A voice disturbs my peaceful walk towards the library. "Oh, Beta Damien. How are you this fine morning?" I say passing him, not really in the mood for a chat with this weird fellow. He made my skin crawl in a very unpleasant manner.

"Where are you rushing off too mama?" I gag. Eew! "To the library dada!" I shout picking up my pace. All I hear is his laugh before i round the corner of the library door. Immediately when I get in the delicious smell of old books attacks my nose and I take a deep breath in.

"Now where was I?" I mutter under my breath while heading for the book I was reading yesterday. It was exactly where I left it. Mate Bounds. I know I'm getting ahead of myself but I want to be prepared when I meet him. I can hardly contain myself. In six days, six! Lordess grant me strength.

Will it be someone from the pack? Will I need to go out of the pack to look for him?

"Princess, her highness the Queen mother sent me to tell you to wipe the floors." A voice says at the door and my brows furrow for a split second before I see who it is.

"I wonder who you're trying to mimick.?" I say laughing. Leo was my best friend, well besides Octavia. He was like the big brother I never had or never wanted. He's a bully! "Hey buttercup, what you up to?" He says strolling inside the library with his royal guard uniform on. "Oh you know, the usual." I say flicking a page.

"Daydreaming about mates I see." He says chuckling. "Hey! It's called being hopeful okay? Not all of us are like you." I yell defending myself and Leo raises his hands in surrender. "I don't know Ria. I believe everyone deserves to choose who they want to be with, not get them chosen for you." He says with his brown eyes twinkling when they settle on me.

"But that's the fun part Lee, not knowing who they are, waiting until you're of age to meet them. You just have to enjoy the process."

"I'm sorry I'm not as optimistic as you princess."

"So, are you off duty?"

"Yeah, I'm done for the day. Marcus switched with me, I'm not feeling too good." I frown at that. "Are you okay, what's wrong?" I ask in a slight panic. Werewolves rarely got sick and when we did it was usually a sign of death.

"Are you dying?" I ask the same time he says, "I guess I just needed some vitamin BC" I roll my eyes, wanting to hit him with the book. Vitamin BC meant vitamin buttercup, which happened to be me.

Leo laughs, his eyes twinkling mischievously. "Okay then your royal pain in my ass. Where do we suppose we go this fine morning?"

"It's mid-day chicca."

"Oh, must have gone blind from looking this sexy, I didn't notice." We both laugh and link our arms together as we exit the library walking in sync like lovers.

Leo and I head to my first favourite place on the royal grounds. The gardens. It was huge,with benches and fountains, you'd swear it is a park. When we get there I immediately let go of Leo's arm and start hoping around touching the delicate petals of the flowers. Leo sits in his usual place on one of the benches and just stares at me like I'm the light to his dying universe.

"Oh Lee, look look!" I shout pointing at a butterfly that sat on my hand. Leo makes the 'good' sign with his hands and smiles.

After a while I hope towards a nearly asleep Leo on the bench and tiptoe towards his ear "Hey buddy, you ready to get spiked!" I shout and he nearly falls off the bench in fright. I almost die laughing, the pout on his face makes me laugh even more.

"Play nice buttercup."

"But where's the fun in that?"

"If I have a mate out there Aria, I wish she's just like you." Leo suddenly says with soft but serious voice, he tucks a loose braid of my kinky air behind my ear. Before I even answer him, a disturbing growl shakes the whole garden. I'm sure the even the dead wolves in the Avian ice heard it.

"Get the hell away from her pup!" Kian roars with each mighty step he takes towards us. What the hell is wrong with this guy?. Leo doesn't budge next to me, we just stare at the fuming alpha like he's grown two heads, which would have been comical by the way.

"I said, get the fuck away from her" Kian says clutching Leo's hand that was still cupping my face. I look at the bite mark on Kian's left hand and I almost snicker with pride. I can leave another one now if he doesn't leave my poor Lili alone.

"Kian let go of him." I said looking at his black eyes. Instead of doing as I say Kian clutches Leo's hand even harder and gasp trying to get him to let go. "Kian you're hurting him!"

I see Leo looking at Kian with an unknown expression before a smirk graces his face and I frown. What's there to be smirking about when your hand is about to get crushed by the devil.

"Kian please, Leo didn't hurt me. Please let him go." I say feeling my eyes burn with tears. Yes I cry a lot.

Seeing the look on my face Kian pulls Leo off the bench unceremoniously and barks in his face "leave pup" Leo just winks at me and turn to leave, leave me with the devil himself who was currently trying to calm himself down. His breath coming out raggedly.

"What's wrong...with you?" I finish my sentence in his tight embrace, his face buried in my neck. "Uhh... Kiki, are you okay, are you sick?" I ask starting to be really concerned about his behaviour. I hear him chuckle, his hot breath fanning my neck.

"Sick? No bunny. I don't want to see you with that boy ever again." He growls out with my tinny shoulders clutched in his huge hands. I giggle. "Oh silly Kiki, your big brother instincts are kicking in huh?" I giggle even more. "Lili is my friend and he's harmless, plus I'm gonna find my mate in six days Kiki what will you do then huh, bark in his face too?." I say patting his head like he's a toddler. The murderous look on his face amusing me even further.

"Leave pup!" I growl out mimicking him and then laughing in his stoic face. "I will tear any male, wolf or not, who ever comes close to you to pieces. I will feed them to my lycans in the dungeons." He says not blinking and I gulp, the playfulness gone from my face.

"You will not touch my mate Kiki, if you do so much as look in his direction I will elope with him." I tell him in all seriousness before I swivel and run out of the gardens, missing the pair of eyes that stared down from the balcony.