Chilled Hearts- Love Unthawed

"OH GOD!!!!!" I pressed the brake and stormed out of the car, shouting in frustration as my eyes widened, inspecting the damage where the bullet had struck my vehicle. My muscles tensed with fury at the sight of the damage inflicted upon the car door. This wasn't just any vehicle; it was my only car, that I could afford to buy with every penny I had saved from years of hard work. "What the hell is going on?"

Jiwoo hurriedly stepped out of the car, his expression mirroring my shock. "I... I'm not sure, ma'am." He stammered. "But it looked like there was some kind of encounter or gang activity." My jaw clenched as I looked around, trying to make sense of what Jiwoo had just said. In the distance, the faint sound of sirens signaled the approach of law enforcement in our direction.

"Ma'am, we needed to get out of there," Jiwoo urged, his voice urgent. "It isn't safe here." I was already frustrated from the long day of work, and now the sight of the damage to my car only made me angrier. Yet I couldn't lose my composure, especially not now. It was late at night, and I was with my junior, who looked scared after hearing a gunshot and sirens.

I hummed and turned to hop back into the car, but something caught my eye-a figure, barely visible in the dark alley. "Arghhhh..." With a soft pained groan, the figure collapsed to the ground, slumping against the nearby wall. My heart skipped a beat as I realized someone needed help.

"Wait," I said firmly and took a step towards the alley, but Jiwoo tried to stop me. "There's someone there who needs help. We can't leave like this." I ignored his protest and rushed forward. "Jiwoo, bring the emergency kit with you."

"But, ma'am, It's dangerous..."

"We are doctors. It's our duty," I glared at Jiwoo. He complied and ran to me with the kit. I kneeled beside the injured man and asked, "Are you alright, Sir?" It was really hard to see him properly with no light.

The injured man winced in pain as he attempted to sit up, his hand pressing against a bleeding wound on his side. "Define 'alright'!" He grunted through clenched teeth. "I've been shot."

I tried to assess his condition carefully as it was dark. I roamed my palm on his stomach to search for the wound, but he held my hand tightly with his rough hand and pressed my hand on his chest, where he was shot. I stated bluntly, my tone devoid of any sympathy. "Looks like a clean shot, but you're losing blood."

He chuckled dryly, a hint of bitterness in his voice. "Observant, aren't you?"

Ignoring his sarcasm, I motioned for Jiwoo to bring the emergency kit closer. "We need to stop the bleeding and remove the bullet. Can you lay down?" The man nodded weakly, gritting his teeth against the pain as he struggled to comply. "It's okay. Just try to keep breathing."

"Jiwoo, give me the gloves and prepare the anesthesia injection." Jiwoo nodded his head and handed me the gloves. I tapped the man's face. "Sir, look at me and tell me your name."

"Kim...." He tried to reply, panting heavily, but couldn't. I unbuttoned his shirt and tried to examine the wound.

"It's okay, you're doing good." I kept talking with the man to make sure that he was breathing. Jiwoo gave me the injection, and I wasted no time applying it. Jiwoo was giving me medical supplies according to the requirements, and I started my work.

"Ma'am, there is no light; how will you find the bullet?" Jiwoo's voice was filled with worry, or I would say anxious.

I heard his words but remained silent. Focus... Focus, I just need to focus. Putting a little pressure near the wound, I inserted my index finger where I cut the skin and tried to feel the bullet. According to my experience, the bullet shouldn't penetrate the skin too deeply, and thank God, the wound was far from the heart.

"Found it," I muttered to myself, exhaling a sigh of relief. "Give me the tenaculum, fast." Jiwoo handed me the tool, and I swiftly inserted the tip of the scissors to take out the bullet. As I was pulling the bullet out slowly, I heard some footsteps from behind. "Focus. Focus." I repeated to myself.

"Jiwoo, concentrate here." I yelled, but not too loud, when I noticed that his hands were trembling in fear. As the scissors came out, it had a bullet at its tip. I threw the bullet and passed the scissors to Jiwoo and demanded, "Cotton roll and then needle holder and thread." Jiwoo was shaking badly, but still, he did his best and followed all my commands.

"Done." I finished stitching the wound. I gestured for Jiwoo to clean and bandage the area, then stood up to face the men who had approached.

Two figures stood before me, masked and dressed in black. Mafia? Undercover agents? I couldn't be sure. Both were taller than me, but one was slightly shorter than the other. I removed my gloves and addressed them, my tone cold and authoritative. "Are you with him?" The shorter one nodded his head. Maybe it was a wrong idea to ask them what if they were his enemies, but they didn't stop me while I was treating him, so I think I was right. "Who is the senior among you?" The shorter one took a step closer to me.

"He was lucky we came on time," I remarked, not bothering to meet his gaze. "Another few minutes, and he might be dead." I moved a step back and gave a glance to the injured man. "He should be stable for now. But he needs proper medical attention."

"Thanks for the patch-up, Doc." The shorter man gave a curt nod and acknowledged.

"Suit yourself." With that, I turned and saw that Jiwoo had finished his tasks as well. "Let's go," I said curtly, gesturing for Jiwoo to follow. As we drove away from the alley, the distant wail of sirens filled the night air.

THREE YEARS LATER,

"Ansh......!!!!"

"Ansh..........!!! Baby come down fast, you're getting late for your school." I called out again from the kitchen and again got busy preparing the lunch box. Placing the breakfast on the dining table, I glanced around, but there was still no sign of him.

"Ansh... if you don't come......" I shouted, but before I could complete it, I saw him at the top of the stairs, his school bag slung over at one shoulder. He was looking smart in his perfectly-ironed uniform with a few unruly strands of hair falling onto his forehead.

"Sorry Mama," He said with a soft smile, bounding down the stairs two at a time. "I was searching my watch." The way he came downstairs, I couldn't help but feel panic. What if his steps slip and he fell down?

"Okay, sit down and finish your breakfast." I took his hand, guiding him to his chair and placed the plate of his favorite breakfast, Dhokla (an Indian dish). His eyes sparkled seeing the breakfast and he looked at me with a big bunny smile. A warm feeling spread through me as I watched him eagerly take a bite, his face lighting up with delight.

"Mm... mm......," He moaned, appreciatively, savoring a mouthful. "Superb, Mama." He gave me double thumbs-up, bouncing on his seat.

"Well, you better hurry up or you'll miss the bus." I reminded him, trying to sound stern but failing badly as I observed the lively spirit before me, devouring his breakfast as if someone might steal it away. With a quick nod, he finished his food and dashed into the kitchen, where I handed him his lunch box and a kiss on his forehead. "Have a great day and study properly."

"Thanks, Mama!" He exclaimed giving me a quick side hug before running out of the door. I followed him to the door and stood there, watching as he got engaged in talking with his friend, SoYeona who lives in the neighborhood. They seemed to be sharing some animated chatter, their laughter echoing in the morning air. As the school bus approached, both glanced back at me before bidding farewell with a wave and a smile.

For the past ten years, my morning routine has been the same. Waking up before dawn, cleaning our small apartment, then prepare breakfast and a lunch box for Ansh, ensuring he's ready for school. Being a sole family of an over-energetic child, especially without financial stability was very difficult at the beginning, but I've managed better than I thought. I sighed, stepping out of my room and walked into the living area. After grabbing the house and car keys, I locked up and left.

Pulling into the parking lot of the forensic laboratory in the heart of Seoul, I noticed a new, luxurious car parked beside mine. Glancing at my own vehicle, old and scarred with scratches, I shrugged off the comparison and headed inside.

The forensic laboratory was housed in a sleek, modern building with a glass facade that shimmered under the early morning light. The lobby was spacious, with a polished marble floor and contemporary art paints adorning the walls. A large, circular receptionist desk dominated the center, staffed by a friendly receptionist who greeted everyone with a warm smile.

"Good morning, Aavya." She greeted with soft smile as I walked past.

"Morning." I replied with a nod, heading towards the, joining the stream of employees. I pressed the button, and within moments, the elevator doors opened with a soft chime. The ride to the 6th floor was smooth and swift. The 6th floor was for the forensics unit.

Stepping out, I walked down the corridor lined with framed photographs of the lab's notable cases and achievements. The atmosphere here was a blend of professionalism and high-tech efficiency. The interior was simple with a blend of functionality and style, with glass-walled offices lining the perimeter and open workstations in the center. The color scheme was neutral, with shades of gray and white accented by splashes of green from the potted plants strategically placed around the floor.

After swiping my ID card through the access, the glass door opened. My table was a small cubicle near the door, close to the large windows that offered a panoramic view of the bustling city below. Well, the spot wasn't much good, but it was my space. I hung my bag on the back of my chair and wore my laboratory white coat, ready to start the day.

As I walked into the laboratory, the usual hum of the others greeted me. Like every day, I was ready to hear comments from someone. As I took a left turn, one of my colleagues, Chang-min spoke, "Ah, if it isn't our charity case." He sneered as I entered. "How's life in the land of mediocrity?"

Chang-min had always been condescending, looking down on me for my middle-class background and the fact that I got this job through a recommendation from a friend, and it was the truth I never denied.

I paused, my eyes locking onto his, but I decided not to engage. Instead, I walked past him, heading to my small desk where some evidences from a current case was neatly wrapped and labelled. I settled in, quickly immersing myself in my work, trying to ignore the stares and whispers. it wasn't new for me so I ignored them.

But I think Chang-min wasn't done as he didn't get any respond from me. He followed me, leaning against my desk with a smirk. "You know, some of us actually earned our place here. Must be nice to just skate by on favours." I continued to ignore him, focusing on the evidences in front of me, but my patience was wearing thin.

He leaned in closer and tried to provoke me, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "Do you even know what you're doing, or do you need another recommendation to figure it out?"

That was the final straw. I straightened up and looked him squarely in the eye, my voice calm but laced with steel. "Chang-min, I get it. You need to feel superior to someone to make up for your own insecurities. But let me give you a piece of advice: competence speaks for itself. If you spent half as much time doing your job as you do trying to undermine others, maybe you wouldn't feel so threatened."

The office fell silent, all eyes on us. Chang-min's face turned a deep shade of red, and he opened his mouth to retort, but no words came out. He glared at me for a moment before turning on his heel and walking away, while muttering something under his breath.

I took a deep breath and looked at everyone. Their eyes were still on me. "What? Today's episode is over." I shrugged, giving them a stare. Gradually, the buzz returned to normal. I sat back down at my desk, feeling a sense of relief wash over me.

I opened the drawer and took out a new pair of gloves, and was about to wear them when my phone rang with a message tone. I opened the message and read: "My Cabin." I quickly got up and ran towards the team leader's cabin. He's good but very strict.

As I reached his door, I took a deep breath and knocked lightly. A stern voice responded, "Come in." I entered the cabin, and Mr. Kang Seung-min was sitting behind his large desk, his eyes fixed on a report. He barely looked up as he gestured for me to sit down.

"Good morning, Mr. Kang," I greeted him, trying to sound confident. He finally looked up, his sharp gaze making me feel like I was one of the suspects related to some case. Mr. Kang was an imposing figure, tall and lean with a meticulously groomed appearance, in his late forties age. His jet-black hair was styled perfectly, not a strand out of place. His eyes, cold and calculating, were framed by a pair of thin, rectangular glasses that added to his severe demeanour. The high cheekbones and sharp jawline only accentuated his stern look.

He placed the file on the table, rested his hands on it and said, "Aavya, I have one task for you." His tone stern, leaving no room for questions. I nodded my head, waiting for him to continue, knowing it must be some errand to run. "I need you to go to storage room and retrieve the files of three cases. The cases are old, so maybe they are in the blue cabinets, top drawer. Bring them to me as soon as possible. You understand?" He wrote down the case names along with years on a slip and shifted it to my side.

"Yes sir, I'll get them." I replied, taking the slip and standing up from the chair.

As I turned to leave, he added, "And don't waste time questioning others' competency. Do your work properly. You may have gotten this job through recommendation, but you will get your salary only if you work properly."

I swallowed hard, knowing what he was saying. "Of course sir." I left his cabin, my mind racing. Although my friend helped me get this job, but she couldn't save me from being put under the strict team leader. I sighed and looked at the slip, another errand to run. I shook my head and then walked away towards storage room.

The storage room was in the basement, a place I often visited; because for everyone, I was just a girl who run errands for everyone, more like a servant than a colleague. I made my way down the dimly lit stairs and stood in front of the door. I have stayed up all night with dead bodies in the lab and didn't feel anything, but whenever it came to the storage room, I felt uneasiness.

Pushing the door open, I flicked on the light switch. The storage room was cluttered, filled with old equipment, boxes, and rows of filing cabinets. I located the blue file cabinet and opened the top drawer. The drawer creaked loudly, and I winced, half expecting Mr. Kang to appear and reprimand me for the noise. I searched through the drawer, the dust making me sneeze. After a few minutes, I found the first file. Checking the slip Mr. Kang had given me, I confirmed it was one of the cases he needed. I continued searching, pulling out the remaining files one by one. Finally, with all three files in hand, I closed the drawer and hurried back upstairs.

I knocked on Mr. Kang's door again, and this time he called out, "Enter." I handed him the files, and he glanced through them, nodding slightly. "Okay." He said, looking up at me. "Did you finish the examination of those evidences we got last week?"

"Yes, sir. I finished and I already sent them back with the report. As for the evidences we received yesterday, I'm going to start on that now."

"Good." He replied. "You may go now and start your work. Report to me before you leave for lunch."

"Yes, sir. Thank you." I said quietly, leaving his office.

Sitting down, I started looking into the evidence on my table. Everyone was busy with their work. The forensic laboratory where I worked was very famous because of its location and the results we provided. All the employees were graduates from reputed universities and highly qualified doctors. As for me, well, it's best to leave that unsaid. I engrossed myself in work, never knowing when someone might come by to make snide comments; there was no fixed pattern to their interruptions.

Suddenly, Hana, one of the more outspoken members of the team, sauntered over to my desk. She had a habit of poking her nose where it didn't belong. "Hey, Aavya." She began, her tone dripping with false sweetness. "Mr. Kang giving you more errands to run? Must be nice to have such an easy job."

I looked up from my work, meeting her gaze with a cold stare. "What do you want, Hana?" I asked, my voice steady and indifferent.

"Oh, nothing. Just making conversation." She said with a smirk. "You know, some of us have real work to do."

I felt a flicker of irritation but kept my expression neutral. "If you have time to bother me, you must not be as busy as you claim," I retorted, turning back to my screen.

Her smirk faltered, and she narrowed her eyes. "Watch it, Aavya. You wouldn't want to make any enemies here."

My eyes remained fixed on the screen. "I'm not here to make friends or enemies, Hana. I'm here to do my job. If you have a problem with that, it's your issue, not mine."

When she didn't respond, I assumed she had left, but when I turned, she was still standing near my desk, her face twisted in annoyance. Hana opened her mouth to retort, but before she could speak, I said, "Hana, I don't want to fight. Let me do my work, and you do yours."

Hana shot me a glare. "Don't order me. I know what my work is, and I do it better than you because I'm not at anyone's mercy." She spat before slinking back to her desk. I shook my head and shrugged it off. It was a waste of time to argue with them. They wouldn't understand, so I returned to my work.

The hours passed quickly as I worked on the evidence. I really don't understand why people commit crimes, knowing that technology has made it so much easier to catch them. I made detailed notes, ensuring everything was meticulously documented. The clock ticked closer to lunchtime, and I knew I needed to report to Mr. Kang soon.

Just before noon, I gathered my notes and the report, then headed towards Mr. Kang's office. I knocked on the door, and his familiar stern voice called out, "Enter." I walked in, finding him reviewing a different set of documents. He looked up briefly and gestured for me to sit down. I placed the reports on his desk and sat, waiting for him to speak.

"Did you finish the initial examination of the evidence?" He asked, his tone professional. Sometimes, I wondered if his voice was always this stern or if he reserved a different tone for his family.

"Yes, sir," I replied. "Here are the reports and my notes." He nodded, scanning through the documents. After a moment, he set them aside and leaned back in his chair, his gaze piercing.

"Aavya, when I learned that you got this job through a recommendation and were placed under my supervision, I had only one thing in mind: to find a reason to throw you out." He said bluntly. "But I needed a valid reason, which is why I've never appreciated your work." I looked down at my lap, his words cutting deep. Despite his harshness, I was grateful he hadn't dismissed me yet. But the feeling was... bitter.

"But after seeing you struggle and persevere for over a year, I've decided to give you one last chance to prove yourself." He continued, his voice now lower and more serious. He pushed the three files I had retrieved from the storage room towards me. "I want you to work on these cases. Read them, make summaries, and show it to me. I will then tell you the real task. Make sure no one else knows about this. Do you understand?"

I nodded, a sense of intrigue mixing with apprehension. "Yes, sir. I'll handle it carefully."

"Good. You may go now and start your work. Report to me about these files tomorrow morning."

"Yes, sir. Thank you." I said quietly, leaving his office. As I walked back to my desk, clutching the files, I had only one thing in my mind- whatever is coming, I will finish it completely with full determination. I got this chance and I couldn't afford to fail.

The steady hum of the elevator was the only sound breaking the silence as I ascended to the top floor of the building. My building. The chrome doors reflected my impassive expression, revealing nothing but the calculated indifference I wore like a second skin. As the numbers climbed, I mentally shifted through the morning's agenda, each task more tedious than the last. Meetings, decisions, sign-offs-an endless cycle of banalities that others deemed important.

The doors slid open with a muted chime, and I stepped into the hushed corridor of my empire. The plush carpet absorbed the sound of my footsteps, leading me to the expansive glass doors of my office. They swung open automatically, a testament to the efficiency I demanded.

"Good morning, Mr. Kim," Aerin, my assistant, greeted me as I strode past her desk. Her voice was a practiced blend of respect and fear, the only acceptable tone when addressing me. I gave a curt nod, not bothering to slow my pace.

My office was a testament to minimalist luxury-sleek, cold, efficient. Floor-to-ceiling windows offered a panoramic view of the city below, but I never bothered to look. Instead, I moved directly to my desk, a monolithic slab of black marble, and sank into the leather chair behind it. The schedule was already on my desk, meticulously organized. A quick glance told me everything I needed to know. I buzzed Aerin. "The board meeting," I began, my voice devoid of warmth, "has it been rescheduled?"

"Yes, sir. It's at eleven sharp." She replied, her words clipped.

"Good. Have the reports been prepared?" I asked and leaned back, surveying the sterile expanse of my office. There's no room for mistakes. Not in my world. Everything in its place, everything under control. Just as I demanded.

"Yes, sir. They're on your desk." I moved my gaze on my desk and found the stack of documents neatly arranged on the mahogany surface. I dismissed her call and picked up the documents. I glanced at the reports, my mind already dissecting the data and making predictions for every possible outcome. Control is everything. Control is what has brought me to the pinnacle of this industry.

People often say I am ruthless. Heartless. They were right. Emotions were for the weak, a distraction from the singular goal that consumed my every waking moment-dominance. In the cutthroat world of music entertainment, there was no room for softness, no place for mercy. Every decision and every move was calculated for maximum gain. Each decision I made rippled through the entertainment industry, a testament to the empire I had built.

My mobile buzzed, interrupting the silence. With a sigh, I picked it up without looking at the caller ID. "What?" My tone was curt, as usual. My mobile number was only shared with a select few individuals, all of whom were incredibly trustworthy. Trust was a rare commodity in my world, and those who possessed it were few and far between.

"No, hello, no good morning. Nice way of treating your lawyer, who can easily sue you," came the voice of Min Jiyoon, my lawyer and closest confidant in business matters.

"Good morning, sir. How can I help you?" I replied, my tone mocking.

"Oh, please, this much sweetness; I don't want to get diabetes. I just called to inform you that I am coming to the company. I have something important to discuss with you." Jiyoon's voice held a hint of amusement.

I sighed inwardly. Jiyoon was one of the few people who could get away with teasing me. "Understood. I'll see you when you get here." I said, ending the call before he could make any more comments.

As I waited for Jiyoon to arrive, despite my outward composure, a sense of unease gnawed at the edges of my thoughts. Jiyoon's unexpected visit could only mean one thing-trouble. Minutes stretched into what felt like an eternity before there was a knock on the door. "Enter," I called out, steeling myself for whatever news Jiyoon brought.

The door swung open, and Jiyoon strode in with his usual confident air. His sharp black suit and composed demeanor contrasted sharply with my own more casual attire.

"Good morning, Hyung." I greeted him with a nod, masking any hint of concern. Hyung. Yes, I still called him that, despite the fact that my sister had divorced him. I kept him close because he was one of the few people I trusted implicitly. Jiyoon Hyung was someone I could rely on with my life.

"Morning, SeoJoon." He replied, his expression unreadable as he took a seat opposite me. Jiyoon, in his late 30s, was the epitome of a smart, sophisticated man. He had sharp, defined features, a strong jawline, and eyes that held a keen intelligence. His impeccable sense of dressing style could fail any famous models, always donning tailored suits that complemented his lean, athletic build. His hair was neatly styled, and he carried himself with a confidence that demanded respect. "I trust you're well." He continued.

"As well as can be expected," I replied evenly. "Now, what's this urgent matter you need to discuss?"

Jiyoon Hyung hesitated for a moment before speaking, choosing his words carefully. "It's about the collaboration between one of our soloists and the band. There have been some complications."

I arched an eyebrow; my interest piqued. "Complications? Elaborate."

"The soloist, Jinah, is refusing to continue with the project. She claims that the creative direction is compromising her artistic integrity." Hyung explained, his tone measured. "Instead of talking with the producer and other team members, she came to me and said that if the collaboration will not happen according to her, she will file a lawsuit against the company."

I leaned back in my chair, my eyes narrowing. "Artistic integrity?" I echoed, the disdain in my voice palpable. "She's under contract. She'll do as she's told."

Hyung sighed, a rare display of frustration. "I understand, but she's threatening to go public with her grievances. If this leaks, it could damage both her reputation and ours." I really hate those people who first come as nobody and, when they gain fame, start behaving like they can go behind the company and the person who helped them reach that stage.

I stared at him, my mind racing through potential solutions. "Warn her. Remind her of the terms of her contract and the consequences of breaching it. If she refuses to comply, make it clear that her career will be over."

"Understood." Hyung replied, though his expression suggested he wasn't entirely comfortable with the approach. "I'll handle it."

"Do you suggest any other approach, Hyung?" I asked, leaning on the table slightly.

Jiyoon Hyung hesitated, his eyes reflecting a hint of concern. "I know you are going to say no, but we could try to negotiate a compromise with her, perhaps adjust the creative direction slightly to address her concerns. It might be a way to keep the project on track without resorting to threats. She is one of the best artists under this company, and her fans support her a lot."

I considered his suggestion for a moment, weighing the potential benefits and drawbacks. "Fine," I conceded. "Attempt to negotiate a compromise first. But if she continues to be difficult, proceed with the warning. We cannot afford delays."

Jiyoon Hyung nodded, a slight look of relief crossing his features. "I'll handle it."

"Good. Is there anything else?" I asked, preparing to shift my focus back to the documents on my desk.

For a moment, Jiyoon Hyung remained silent, his demeanor shifting from professional to something more personal. He leaned back in his chair, his eyes softening. "Actually, SeoJoon, there is something else." He said, his voice tinged with emotion.

I looked up, surprised by the sudden change. "What is it, Hyung?" By looking at his face, I got a hint as to what was going to ask.

He took a deep breath, as if steeling himself. "How are they?" He asked quietly. "How are SooJin and JaeMin?"

I felt a familiar pang of pain at the mention of my sister and my nephew. "They're managing." I replied, my voice tight. "SooJin is still trying to move on. It's been hard for her, but she's strong. And JaeMin... he's growing up fast."

Jiyoon's eyes darkened with a mixture of guilt and longing. "I miss them," he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. "I know I don't have the right to ask, but... how is JaeMin doing in school? Is he making friends?"

"He's doing well." I said, my tone softening slightly. "He's a bright kid, top of his class. He still asks about you sometimes."

Jiyoon's expression crumpled for a moment before he composed himself. "I never wanted to hurt them," he said, his voice filled with regret. "I still care about them both, more than you can imagine."

"I know you do," I replied, my gaze unwavering. "But the past is the past. You made your choices, and now we all have to live with them."

He nodded, a shadow of pain crossing his face. "I just... I just wanted to make sure they were safe and fine."

"They're okay, Hyung," I assured him, though the words felt heavy. "They're getting through it, one day at a time."

Jiyoon Hyung gave a small, sad smile. "Thank you, SeoJoon. For looking after them."

"Of course," I said, my voice firm. "They're my family. And despite everything, so are you."

He looked at me, gratitude and sorrow mingling in his eyes. "I appreciate that, SeoJoon. Truly." Standing up and adjusting his suit jacket. "I'll get going first. Thank you, SeoJoon. For everything." I nodded, watching as he left the office. The door closed behind him with a soft click. I turned back to the documents on my desk.