Beyond Our Imagination

It was quiet at the dinner table today as if an eerie presence swept over us. We all know it, as it has become too familiar to us.

I stare down at my food: a simple slice of unleavened bread and leftover soup from yesterday night. It wasn't much, but it was better than what we usually had. Lifting my finger, I poke into the bread, taking note of the fact that it was rock solid. I dipped it into the soup and took a bite, letting the taste linger in my mouth before lowering my hand and placing it back on the table. For some reason, it's like I've lost my appetite.

I listen to the silent munching of everyone: my sister, my dad, and my mom. Maybe the reason we were so quiet was that no one was feeling hopeful. After all, we were well aware that Dad got laid off at work. I hate living like this: going day by day using what little we have left to get by. What'll happen when it's all gone? No one is going to hire my dad anymore since he's at the age he should be retiring.

I suppose that's the way it works in the upside-down world called the Kanen ghetto. No matter how hard you try, life's going to swing back at you even harder to make sure you stay down. It's not only me who knows this simple fact, every single resident of the Kanen ghetto feels it. It settles in slowly, yet once you realize it, it's already consumed you.

Sometimes, actually, all the time, living like this makes me jealous of everyone on the other side of the fence in Triary. They live with their skyscrapers, lavish mansions and large-scale monopolies. To them, we're nothing more than pawns to play in their businesses. We work for them and they can turn our life into hell. Why? Because that's just how it works. In the end, life is never fair, but people in the Kanen ghetto understand that from a young age. Triary civilians? They understand nothing and it makes my blood boil.

Feeling antsy, I get up from the table and grab my food, making my way to the kitchen to pack it away for tomorrow.

"Aren't you hungry?" Hyerin, my sister, said with a puzzled look on her face.

"I just wanted to save some food for tomorrow. Since, you know..."

"I know" Her voice dropped.

It looked like she was about to cry. Everyone in the room just hung their heads low. After all, it was the truth.

"I'm going to look for a job. Starting tomorrow. Maybe I can find one" I add hopefully

Maybe a little too hopeful for our situation. Maybe we've hit rock bottom and now, maybe we're trapped. I don't see it getting any better, but maybe, just maybe, I could be wrong. Some part of me still thinks otherwise, yet I try to brush it off.

My mom and dad look at me weird for even suggesting I try to find a job since I'm not known to like working. For the sake of my family, it's worth trying.

I muster a smile and pack my food in my bag. I may not be able to see in the future, but I will inevitably walk around for quite some time. I go over to the run-down couch to sit and think. I like thinking, and since I feel peculiarly in a thinking state, I turn on the TV. It was a simple boxy TV with no colour that my best friend Seunghee and I found in a dumpster by the Triarians. They throw away treasures, I'm telling you. The TV was like a wonder to me - a whole new world, to put it a better way. It makes me happy.

I peek over to the dinner table to see that Hyerin has finished her food. Waving over at her, I signal for her to join me and she follows suit, sitting on my lap. Hyerin takes to her normal position and props her head to the arms of the couch while letting the rest of her body drape over me like a weighted blanket.

"I promise I'll find a job." I blurt out to no one in particular. "I literally won't go back home tomorrow until I apply for 10 jobs."

Hyerin says nothing and wraps both her arms around me, snuggling into my abdomen. Sighing, I pick up my hand and brush her hair out of her face.

Hyerin is only 6 years old and she deserves so much better than what she's being given right now. She's the brightest kid I know, in more ways than one, and just as affectionate. Who else is fit to provide for a kid like her?

I realize only now, more than ever, that I need a job. I tilt my head to meet face to face with Hyerin. She stares up at me inquisitively for a bit.

"I'll be there for you. As long as I'm here, expenses are something you'll never need to worry about." I say softly, continuing to brush her hair.

From the corner of my eye, I see my parents show a smile for me. It's faint, but I see it and it warms me ever so slightly. I promise I won't let you down, you can count on it.

Today felt like a new day, well, that's because it was. It was also partially due to the newfound hope I had built up from last night.

Another thing, I suppose, is waking up to Hyerin jumping up and down on my bed excitedly. That kid has no limits to her energy, I swear. Seeing her genuinely happy is enough to put me in a good mood.

Feeling a little sore, I sit up, propping myself on my bed headboard to hug Hyerin. After all, it's not every day I get to.

"You need to wake up to find a job." She said somewhat cheerfully with a hint of confidence in her voice.

"Of course, now I need to get changed and I'll be right back down." I say, trying to match her level of enthusiasm.

Getting out of bed, I make my way to a small folded pile of clothes and start to change. I guess I have to wear something nicer today if I am going to be applying for a job. I want to show that I'm more well-put-together than I actually am - just like every applicant from the Kanen ghetto.

I reach for the small stack and pull out a layer from it, unravelling the piece to reveal a flow summer dress. I hastily unlace the back to slide it onto me. It's a fitted dandelion-yellow coloured garment that I usually never wear. I've been saving it for an appropriate occasion as it's the only nice thing I have. It doesn't seem like something I'd wear and yet, today, I feel rather confident wearing it.

Walking past the mirror, I catch a glimpse of myself. It's a beat-up mirror, but it does just fine. I admire myself in the mirror for a bit. My long, wavy black hair and my shiny hazel eyes complemented the dress quite nicely, I thought. If I had to be honest, I didn't look much like myself while wearing something so different than usual.

With a new skip in my step, I head to the main room to grab my bag. Maybe once we've hit rock bottom, there really is no way to go but up.

I turn to my right and see my parents and Hyerin snacking on berries. A clay bowl lied in the center of the table filled with blackberries. I eye Hyerin as she reaches over to the bowl and grabs a handful, scoffing them down her throat. Taking my bag, I make my way to the table to grab a few.

"Where'd you get these?" I manage to say in between mouthfuls

"Hyerin picked them from berry bushes by the Triarians" My dad saw an odd look on my face and proceeded to explain, "The Triarians didn't even care apparently, they saw her and left her be."

My mom did a few 'tsks' under her breath. It was true that they were wasting perfectly good food, not that the Triarians even cared since they had plenty of food while we're left with the crumbs.

"Well, I'll be on my way now. I got a long day of job searching ahead of me." I say as I walk to the door, waving back at Hyerin and Mom.

My mom and Hyerin give approving nods while munching on berries. Meanwhile, my dad, on the other hand, was fast asleep on the chair. He couldn't exactly be bothered, but that's okay.

I take a deep breath as I try to calm myself. I can be sure that there's nothing wrong with me trying to find a job so why do I even feel this way? I felt so confident in myself too just a few minutes ago. What happened? Well, everything happened, obviously, but I wanted to believe that I have shown to the other side.

As I raise my hand to open the rusted doorknob, I can see it quivering and shaking with my hand sinking a bit. Defiantly, I force my hand to open the door as I take a step out of the house.

It's like a new day every day and yet the same process in Triary. A housekeeper comes into my room and silently taps me on my shoulder. I groan silently, picking up a pillow with one hand and using it to cover my head. I truly hate waking up early. Look, if the sun isn't fully up yet, neither am I so leave me alone. I crawl further down into my sheets, wanting to disappear.

"Sir? It's time for you to wake up. Your father has requested to see you." The housekeeper whispered gently, so as to not irritate me any more than I already was.

A part of me wanted to screech, but instead, I stifle the need and do a mental groan, getting out of bed and grabbing a pair of jeans and a t-shirt - nothing too fancy. I felt somewhat tempted to run around the office building in a hoodie and sweatpants, but my dad would have had a thing or two to say about it... or a thousand, I guess.

Most days, I tolerate going to see my father, but on days like these, I hate going to see him. Actually, who am I trying to kid? I can't even tolerate seeing him, in fact, most of the time I won't. We haven't been on good terms lately, as he's forcing me to take his position as owner of our business once he retires. I've never had an interest in business nor finance and my dad's attempts to make me like it when I was younger just pushed me further away from that sort of career path.

I finish shimmying myself into my jeans and shove on my t-shirt over top - untucked, just to annoy my dad. I head to the doorway of my room and reach for a pair of shoes from the rack. After putting my sneakers on, I take to my father's office right away, mainly because I don't want to give him any more reasons to be mad at me than I'm intentionally giving.

As I walk through the corridors, I see housekeepers, servants and workers, all from the Kanen ghetto, bustle about their day. My dad likes hiring people from the Kanen ghetto. It's not out of the goodness of his heart to provide jobs for the people of the region but because he can easily underpay them since they most likely won't be able to find another job. He thinks he's being slick but that sort of con business disgusts me. If I need to do stuff like that to stay the top company, I don't want any part in it. It's not like my dad cares though since he clearly lacks any emotion whatsoever.

Lost in thought, I snap back to reality and turn to my left to see a glistening glass wall that overlooks Kanen. To the right, the view is of Triary. Sometimes, I think about how strange it is to me that the country is split like this, but it is 'none of our concern' as my father says. I don't get why Triary doesn't do anything about Kanen. If it's not out of empathy for the people of Kanen, then at least can they do it for a better view from skyscrapers? I scowl to myself for a bit for even suggesting that.

I continue down the hall of the corporate building to see labelled offices. Each office is the office of an important key to our company. 'Keys' meaning they are basically people who are useful or have contributed to the company. Each doorway is a reminder to me of the number of people who think my father doesn't have mental problems and instead, is the smartest man alive. Just thinking about it alone is enough to make me shudder.

I walk down the stretch of doors, reading each individual label: Mrs. Lee, Mr. Jung, Mr. Kim, Mrs. Kang... I read the labels as I walk by until I reached my father's office. Here we go again.

I sigh and open the door. There, I see my father sitting at his black office chair behind a long glass table with paperwork sprawled about the table like baby vomit. The cabinets in the back seem torn through and more disorganized than usual. He gestures for me to sit on the chair opposite his. I hesitate before taking my seat, my father beginning to speak as I do so.

"Listen, you're already 18 so it's time to give you more responsibility in managing the business."

Already cutting straight to the chase, I see. I'll admit, I almost flipped out until my father cut me off.

"You're going to be interviewing and selecting applicants for our business."

Anger was boiling under my skin. He, as always, ignored me and continued.

"There are currently 46 applicants. I suggest you get started now, as they are all waiting in the lobby."

Yeah, I can somehow manage through dealing with 46 people's shenanigans while still having any bit of sanity left. Yeah, easy ask.

I try not to, but I rolled my eyes so hard, they felt as if they were going to pop out of my eye sockets and bounce across the table. All my father does is look at me with disdain and wave his hand to me, signalling to me that I needed to get started right away. Trying hard not to complain, I head for the door to take the elevator.

My own father treats me as if some sort of troubled child. It's gotten to a point where, for me, I try to annoy him as much as possible, especially in front of his employees. I think it's hilarious seeing him try to excuse my actions in front of others knowing he can't do anything to me in the moment. Call me evil, but I think my actions are well justified most of the time.

I spot the elevators at the end of the hallway and quicken my pace to it. I swear the length of hallways will be the death of me one day. I manage to catch an open elevator and rush to it before it closes. Waiting for an elevator is just dumb most of the time, especially if the building is large and busy, just like this office building. If you miss the elevator, it's good luck to you until another one comes in what feels like forever.

Getting in the elevator, I press the button to the lobby. Now it's just going to be awkward silence all the way down. Great. I'd propose to my dad to install a music system, but I already know what he'd say about it.

While in the process of taking the elevator down, a girl enters midway through. I honestly could use some alone time but I'm not expressing that to a stranger. Brushing off the thought, I examine her closely, trying to rack my brain to see if I have ever seen her around the building. I'm not great with memorizing faces so I wouldn't be surprised if I forgot.

"Excuse me, do you know where the company is holding its interviews?" The girl asks me, seeming lost. "I'm sorry, I've never been in a building this large before."

"It's fine, the interviews are in the lobby. I'm actually heading down there right now." I reply.

"You're applying for a job too?" She inquires.

"No, I'm the one interviewing people."

"Oh, I'm so sorry for not realizing. My name is Hyewon"