Being Alive

It was last day of summer. Last day of holidays and last day of freedom. Yeah, I love holidays, because that's when i can do whatever i want and just don't care about school and homework. But I was so depressed, because I have to go to school tomorrow and I just want to have fun with my best friends and my brother Lincoln, I call him Linc. We were spending our last day on the beach, it was 2 hours away from our home.

The waves were hitting the shore, the sun was shinning brightly and the day seemed calm. The only place that could help me escape from my problems was the ocean. I was a very lonely person from the childhood, but then Mia and Jeremy appeared in the picture. My heart was still limited though. They were the only people who found a key to my cold heart. I may say that I'm a pessimistic person. I laugh probably 2 times a day and only with my friends and brother. I don't know why they are talking with me in the first place, but maybe they are the ones who truly understand me.

"Kylie, I'm gonna dive into the water! And then we'll see who is better!" my brother screamed for me to hear.

"I think everyone knows the answer!" I screamed and smirked.

I saw my best friends Jeremy and Mia sitting on the beach and laughing. I dived into the water saw red corals and near it was a beautiful stone, it was like painted. This stone was mesmerizing and had all colours of rainbow. I didn't take it because I consider that stone had to be where it is now. It is its home.

Suddenly I felt someone pulling my leg. I turned around to see who is that person. I couldn't understand who it was, but I definitely knew it was a boy. I remembered Linc saying that he will dive into the water and I wanted to laugh at him. So I moved closer to him and started pulling his hair. It was so funny for me, but I knew he would be angry and I decided to get out of the water. I was laughing and sat near Jeremy and Mia. Then I noticed Linc being beside us.

Then I knew...

Who was that person? It wasn't Linc. Oh my god! I pulled somebody's hair. Then I looked around with my eyes widened. I think I forgot how to breath. I saw some towels and bags far from us. I didn't think that someone except us was here. Then I saw a person coming out of the water. I was so ashamed of what I did and I just can't look at his eyes now. So I decided to run away and hide somewhere until we decide to go home.

"Where are you going?" Jeremy asked.

But I couldn't reply. I was running so quickly.

I noticed a big rock on the beach far from the guys, and I hid there, still watching at the guys. The one whose hair I pulled was with his back on me, so I couldn't see his face. Then I saw him talking to Lincoln. What? Okay, let's pretend that we are strangers and nor me nor my brother knows him. The poor guy who was my victim took a cab of beer from his bag and started drinking it while talking with Linc. His back looked hot and I can say that he was very tall, probably an inch or two taller than me. Also he had a tattoo on his back and shoulder. I hope he didn't notice me or I would be dead. Why everything awkward should happen with me? I didn't do anything bad in this life!

He was with his friend. His friend was a blonde one. He had a little tattoo of skull in the middle of his back. Please, tell me that these guys aren't criminals who will find me and really kill me! I will be very nice girl and will do only good things.

Then he left with his friend.

I decided to come back when I couldn't see them anymore.

"Ky, what was that?" Linc asked me taking the Coke from the bag.

"It was...nothing! Dad called and asked when we will come home," I answered.

He nodded and took a sip of his Coke. Then Mia asked while looking at something in her phone:

"Are you going?"

"Where?" I asked with a confused look and sat near her.

"One guy throws a party next week because the school starts," she answered and turned off her phone while looking at me.

"I don't know. I don't like parties, you know this!" I answered.

"Oh, come on! This is our last year of school. We should enjoy it. You should definitely go to the party!" Jeremy said taking the can of beer out of his bag.

"I will think about it," I said and started talking about something other to change the subject.

Yeah, I hate parties. I don't like being in really crowded places, nor I like dressing fancy. I think better idea is to stay at home, read or watch films. Probably sleep and listen to music. I can do a lot of things at home, which I can't do at the party.

Some time passed and we decided to go back home. I was listening One Direction while Lincoln was driving. I love listening to musics. They just calm me down and make me travel to unreal world. Sometimes some music can really give me chills because it's so deep. Songs really are showing my mood. When I read lyrics I feel good or bad. And sometimes they really describe my feelings. Singers are people who were through some pain, I reckon. Because they are writing their feelings out and probably they feel sometimes like me. Have you ever thought that this songs are about you? I love depressed songs with a deep meaning because I feel it, every time I am listening to them.

We were home with Jeremy and Mia. Linc went to the club with his friends. Linc is my twin so we are in the same grade. Linc is a very smart boy. He isn't nerd and he doesn't have amazing marks because he is lazy, but what he is really amazing at is football. He is a captain of the school team. He is popular and every girl is in love with him. Even Mia had some feelings for him, I guess they are over.

We decided to lie down and cover ourselves with blankets. We took some food like pop corn, pizza and ice cream.

"Which film do you want to watch?" Jeremy asked us.

"Whatever you want," I answered, shrugging.

The film started. I didn't know the name, because I fell asleep the same minute it started. I don't know why, but I can't watch films. Sleep just takes over my wish of watching a film. And every time I sleep I have nightmares. I don't want to sleep at all but I was used to sleeping before something happened.

I woke up and didn't find Mia and Jeremy. I guess they went when the film ended. I have to get up and get ready for school.

"Are you ready, honey?" Dad screamed from the kitchen.

"Yeah, I am!" I answered coming downstairs. I saw Lincoln eating his breakfast.

"Why didn't you wake me up?" I asked sitting near Linc.

"I knew you will wake up on your own," dad answered getting ready.

"Yeah, I did. And I can't eat my breakfast now!" I said and took my bag.

"Let's go!" I said to Linc coming to the doors.

"Can't you wait until I finish my breakfast?" he asked shaking his head.

"Let me think...no!" I said holding my chin to show that I was thinking.

I went to the car and sat in it, waiting for Linc. When he was coming while looking at his phone, I made a car honk. He jumped.

"I hate you, Kylie!" he said nearly dropping his phone.

I laughed very hard and when he sat I said:

"Love you too!" still laughing.

When we came to school, I came to Mia and Jeremy. Linc went to his friends. We talked and then suddenly Emily, a school gossiper came to us and exclaimed:

"Guys! Raf King comes back!"

"Raf King?" Mia said shockingly.

"Wasn't he sent to Spain?" Jeremy asked.

"Yeah, but he is back! I gotta go, spread the hot news! Bye!" she said and ran to others.

"Who is that?" I asked.

"Raf King?" Jeremy questioned me.

I nodded taking books from my locker. Then I heard loud footsteps and everyone went silent...

Is it...

"Raffael King!" Mia said.

Everyone was looking at him. And then I dared to glance at him. His brown eyes piercing my hazel ones. He had the leather jacket on, white T-shirt underneath and black jeans with a chain on it. He took off his black shades. He had a smirk plastered on his face. I smelled the mint from him. I liked it, because buying mint gums just makes me feel better. And getting this smell stuck in my nose made me feel less awful.

You know when in films you see this bad boy with his famous smirk who just made everyone go crazy and just be shocked... I wasn't one of them. He was bad news and I didn't want to be another one who would fall for him. I know who are bad boys. They use girls like napkins and I am not this napkin. I saw how girls are getting hurt because of such jerks. My brother is one of them, but I can't influence on his choices. Girls end up crying all day because of such boys, but I also think that these girls are fools. I turned on my heel and made my way to the class. The bell rang and everyone went to the classes.

I had math. I was sitting at my usual place. The teacher was explaining something. I had excellent marks. I was like a favourite student of every teacher, as I was singled out. But of course I really would like to be anywhere but school.

I heard the doors opening. I looked at the doors' way and saw that boy with his friend.

"You are late!" Mrs. Brown said.

"Yeah, I have watches too, thank you for telling me what time it is!" he smirked and went to the seat.

He had now smell of nicotine going from him. She stopped him and said:

"Watch your tone! It's rude to talk back to adults, don't you know?"

"I will try," he nodded sarcastically.

And then he went to sit with his friend.

"No! You will sit with Kylie!" Mrs. Brown smiled evilly.

He rolled his eyes and sat near me. I ignored him. He threw the gaze at me and then turned his head back to the phone, but then he turned his head at me really quickly like he didn't notice something the first time. And he put his chin on his palm, elbow supported by the desk and looked at me.

"Hey," he said.

"Hello," I said looking out of the window.

"Excuse me? I am here! Raf King is in front of you! Hello!" he put his smirk on his face.

"And?" I asked looking anywhere but him.

He laughed.

"I'm every girl's dream. You should be grateful that God gave you such a gift today!" he said putting his hands around his neck.

"I think you meant every stupid girl's dream. But I have brains in my head. So sorry, I'm not your another bimbo," I said now looking straight into his eyes.

They were so beautiful and I could... I mentally slapped myself and continued listening to the teacher. Yeah, his eyes were enchanted, but I am not a fool. Nothing will happen between us. I won't let him play me.

The lesson was over and I took my bag and went to have lunch with my friends. I sat with Jeremy and Mia as always. Jeremy was a football player. Mia was a cheerleader. And here I am the one who does nothing except for homework. I said earlier that I'm depressed, right? Jeremy was a very popular guy, Mia was popular as well. Every girl was running after Jeremy, I think they hate me for me being so close to him. Mia, she had a boyfriend. They are so cute together and I'm happy for them.

"And whole lesson, girls were giving him their numbers and he was giving them back writing that they should meet in the janitor's room. Or he was texting someone on his phone!" I explained to my friends and ate my sandwich.

"He is a typical bad boy. Every girl wants him. What else can I say?" Mia said, devouring her sandwich.

I rolled my eyes. Then I saw Linc, Raf and his friend coming in. Linc waved his hand to me, I waved back. Raf looked at me. He checked me out and I rolled my eyes. I guess, with him in my school I will do this a lot. I continued eating my sandwich. I lifted my head and saw Raf kissing some girl. Ew. I think I want to throw up. I mean, get a room. He sat at the table which was in the middle of the cafeteria. She sat on his lap, his hands travelling around her body. I think I had everything I had just eaten stuck in my throat. I stopped looking at them and just continued eating my food and talking with Mia and Jeremy. I wanted to take my juice but it wasn't there. I looked around and saw Raf taking sips from my juice.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Oh, yeah! Thank you!" he said and took my sandwich.

"Don't you dare-" I said but he had already the piece of my sandwich in his mouth.

I took the cup of juice from Mia and poured it down on this jerk. He was shocked and angry, but I was laughing.

"That's what you get, when you mess with my food!" I took my bag and went to the doors as I saw his friend laughing at him.

I left the cafeteria and went to my class. It was Literature and thank God he wasn't there or he would be so annoying. I remembered what I did back there in the canteen and my lips tugged into a smile. I was proud of myself, he shouldn't go around the school like he owned everything.

I have already done everything Mr. Adams told us to do, so I decided to go to the bathroom and just walk a little. I was pulling the doors of girls' bathroom when I felt someone's hand grabbing mine. The next minute I was pinned to the wall, my eyes watching straight to a pair of brown ones.

"Did you really think that you can get away with that?" he asked pointing on his jacket.

"Did you really think that you can get away with my stomach being half empty?" I asked.

"Nerdy-sassy, I knew a lot of girls like you. And everyone gave up and just wanted to be with me even for a minute. You will be the one too. Be careful, I'm hungry and I can smell a perfect prey..." he whispered in my ear with the grin on his face.

His hot breath covering my neck. He bit his lip and then he grabbed my wrists and the grip tightened. My heartbeat was so fast I thought he could hear it. I hoped he didn't, though.

"And by the way, it was hurtful you know? Pulling my hair. I didn't do anything wrong but now I'm planning something!" he added with his back on me.

When I lost his figure out of my sight I breathed out heavily.

Wait...Oh my god! Was he the one? What was that?

When all the lessons ended, I went out of the school and saw Mia and Jeremy talking. I went to them. It was the first day of the autumn and it wasn't cold, but it was very hot. Like it was still summer going on.

"Guys!" I said and they stopped talking to look at me.

"Are you going home?" Jeremy asked.

"Yeah, I should find Linc at first. He is my ride, as always. Have you seen him?" I asked, looking around to find my brother.

"I think I saw him going somewhere with Raf and Dylan," Mia stated.

I rolled my eyes.

"Why is he hanging out with such idiots?" I complained and went searching for Lincoln.

I went to the field, where he was always playing football. The grass was perfectly cut as always. There were some people standing and some of them sitting in the bleachers. I saw my brother standing with Raffael and Dylan. He was laughing, while Raf was with hands in the pockets smiling and talking. He was showing his teeth. They weren't perfect, as everyone would imagine. But he had still a beautiful smile. Dylan had a blade of grass sticking out of his mouth and smiling, listening to Raf.

Dylan looked around and noticed me, I decided to move closer to them. He looked at Lincoln and tapped on his shoulder. And Dylan, having Linc's attention nodded on me. My brother turned around and glimpsed at me. Raffael did the same. His smile disappeared, but this annoying smirk appeared. When I came to them. Dylan and Raf started checking me out.

"Take a picture, it will last longer!" I said and smiled.

Dylan smirked and said:

"I like her. I'm Dylan. And you?" he asked me sticking his hand out to shake mine.

"Kylie," I answered and nodded.

Raf was looking around. Dylan smiled wider, when he realized that I wouldn't shake his hand.

"Bro, you weren't lying when you said that your sister wasn't as everyone!" he said, looking at Lincoln.

I glimpsed at Lincoln, he wanted to avoid my gaze. Raf's phone rang and he went not far from us to talk.

"Anyway, I want home. Will you give me a ride?" I asked, straightening my backpack.

"No, I can't. Sorry, sis!" he answered.

"Great! Couldn't you tell me it earlier. Jeremy would take me home. Thank you, bro!" I said and narrowed my eyes.

I put my hands in my jacket's pockets and was going to leave them, when Raf came back.

"Guys, I have to go," he said and put his phone in his pocket.

"Oh, could you please give a ride to Kylie?" my brother asked.

"Wha-" I opened my mouth but Raf asked:

"Who is it?"

I was angry and I looked st him, with my eyes narrowed.

"I am, idiot!" I said pointing my hand on me.

"Oh, right! Sorry, but nah," he said and turned around to go.

"Come on, man! Please! I did so much for you, for example, when you lost your-" Raf stopped him and said:

"Okay! But don't you dare to finish this sentence!"

I looked at Dylan to understand what they were talking about. But he started laughing. His laugh was cute and contagious. I started smiling too.

"Move!" Raf said walking already.

I mouthed to Lincoln "I will kill you" and he blew me a kiss. I turned around to find Raf, but he was already far. I ran to him. He took his keys from his pocket and sat on the motorcycle. It was black, classic bike. On the motorcycle there was written Harley Davidson. Of course I knew, it was very expensive. There were 2 helmets, and in the front there was a sign "KING" written with big letters.

"Wait? We are going by the motorcycle?" I asked shocked.

"Yeah," he said wearing his helmet.

"No way! I won't sit on this suicide thing!" I said and crossed my hands.

"Okay, I am not against it!" he said and started the motorcycle.

"Stop!" I said and thought for a little. "Fine!" I said and he gave me the helmet.

Mine was red and Raf's was black one. I sat on it and put my hands behind to hold the back of the motorcycle. He looked at me and smirked. I narrowed my eyes and we started driving. It was scary at first but then I felt something good inside me. It was something unusual, I haven't felt it for a long time. Then he started riding faster and I just couldn't be sure while my hands were holding the back of the motorcycle. But I didn't let it go. Then he rode faster and my hands just automatically reached Raf's waist. He looked at my hands and I could feel him smirking. Then he started riding slower.

He did it on purpose!

I didn't remember this road but it was something new and beautiful. We were riding on the bridge and I could see water down there. The road was full of cars and we were riding fast. The wind was blowing right into my face, my hair coming out of the helmet and moving with the wind.

He turned right and then left and we were somewhere unknown. There weren't any cars and all I could see was a road and trees with other bushes and grass by the sides. That's when I felt completely free. I wanted to lift my hand but I thought that it would look ridiculous, I moved my hand from Raf's waist but I hesitated. But then I heard Raf saying:

"Do it."

I looked at his back of the helmet, because he was looking at the road. Then I raised my hand. It was an amazing feeling.

Then we came somewhere, where I have never been earlier. It was a big house. I saw a lot of cars, and the lights in the house were on everywhere. The music was playing loudly and I could say it was a party.

Raf took off the helmet and put it on the motorcycle. I did the same. We went to the house and I saw a lot of people dancing, kissing, drinking and laughing. It was hot inside, because of the big amount of sweaty bodies moving every second. He called someone and said something in his ear so that he could hear. The house was very big, the walls were white, but now it was dirty from drinks. I saw some boys taking a lamp and throwing it at each other. Poor house. The other one pointed at something by his finger and Raf nodded. I went with him somewhere. When we were going upstairs, there wasn't such a loud music so I asked:

"What are we doing here?"

He ignored me.

Then he opened the doors and saw a boy hitting another one. That boy had red knuckles already and the other one, who was laying on the floor, had blood all over his face. Raffael came to the one who was hitting and started beating him hard. Then he lifted another one, I decided to help him. This boy was nearly unconscious. When we came back to the motorcycle, Raf put the boy near the motorcycle and I asked:

"Who is it?"

"My little brother," he answered taking his hair back so that they didn't bother him.

"Why were they fighting?" I asked still shocked.

"Would you stop asking questions?" he asked leaning on the motorcycle and looking into my eyes.

I looked down to his brother.

"Look! I don't know. I came to help my brother. And he is drunk. Do you know how to drive a car?" he asked looking around and thinking about something.

"No..." I said and looked somewhere because I was ashamed.

People of my age had already driving license, but I was afraid... He looked at me confusingly and said:

"Then I will call the Uber. Will you be okay?" he asked when I sat in the car. I nodded and said, looking at his brother

"Good luck."

He nodded.

When I came home, there were my dad and my brother playing Xbox.

"Hey, boys!" I said.

"Where were you?" dad asked, stopping the game.

I looked at Lincoln, he had a bewildered expression.

"With Jeremy and Mia," I answered, kissing my dad on the cheek and going upstairs to my room.

I landed with my face on the bed and took off my shoes. I turned around and now I was laying on my back. Lincoln came in.

"What have you been doing with Raf for so long?" he asked, smirking.

"Not what you are thinking. He just took me to some party, so he could help his brother. He was drunk and someone was beating him," I explained looking at the ceiling.

"James?" Lincoln asked me.

"I don't know," I looked at him confused.

He nodded and left the room. It was already time for my sleep. I changed into my pajamas and went back to my bed. I closed my eyes, ready to sleep, but I wasn't ready to sleep. Yeah, I know, I elucidate very clearly. It's just, everything that happened today flashed in front of my eyes. It was a crazy first day...