Always Yours

Present-day...

''Come on, baby, don't make that face,'' he says, raising his eyebrows and looking at me with a baby face sliding deeper. ''Princess, you can take six inches. Can you?'' I let out a single tear and closed my eyes shut. ''Ugh, you're so boring,'' he says, sighing in frustration. My whole body ached and I could feel it getting numb. He pulled the knife out of my stomach and tossed it across the room.

''You weren't supposed to pull it out,'' I say falling to my knees on the floor that was now covered in my blood, putting my hand to the wound and squeezing it tightly, hoping to slow the bleeding. He reaches for the table, filling himself with another glass of Scotch. I could feel my eyes getting heavy and everything started to get blurry.

''You know, we wouldn't be here if you had minded your goddamn business." ''I told you to mind your business and you didn't, so now I have to teach you a lesson but, we have some things we have to deal with first,'' Reid says taking a sip of his drink. Finally, I collect all my strengths and talk.

" Can you ple... please get me to the doctor first?" I say trying to keep my tears,'' It hurts so much. " He turns his head in frustration, takes the needle from the table, and comes closer to me.

"You can't fool me twice, you know baby," he says, a devilish smile forming on his face.

"No." ''No, please not this again. I will do whatever you want please not this again.'' but none of my pleas worked as I felt something sting my neck.

"I know you'd do anything for me, sweetie, but I'm going to need the strong one for this one," he says and after a couple of seconds I felt dizzy and everything went black.

Four years ago.

I hate school. I hate people. And especially, I hate boys. Why can't people mind their own business and let other people live their lives? I mean, I know we should surround ourselves with positive people and be social, but we can also choose to be alone. I like to be alone and mind my own business, but others seem to have a problem with that.

I turned to the other side of the bed to look at the clock on my nightstand. It was 8:45. I had to get up early to go to school, but here I am still in my comfortable bed, enjoying the peace. Even though I'm almost failing school due to being absent for almost half the year, I couldn't care less. I have no intention of spending this day in that hellhole. Today was supposed to be the best day ever, and I had to enjoy it. But all I can feel is pain and all the bad memories come rushing back.

I get out of bed to get ready for the day. As much as I want to spend all day lying in my bed and sleeping if my aunt sees me like this, she will kill me. I gather all my strength to get out of bed. I need to get rid of this morning's breath as soon as possible if I don't want to kill someone.

After finishing my morning routine, I get dressed and head to the kitchen. I really want to avoid seeing any human beings today, but I know it's impossible.

As soon as I opened the kitchen door, I was faced with a huge mess. There was a pile of unwashed dishes on the sink, flour and sugar all over the place, and my aunt was practically lying on the counter dead asleep. I could hear her soft snores, and I couldn't do anything but laugh at her condition. It's the second year she's done this.

When my parents were alive, we made my birthday cake every year. The three of us gathered together and helped each other. It always ended in a big mess, but we had fun and laughed a lot at each other's plight. My father and I were covered in flour, and the buttercream was almost all over our faces. My mom would try to get the buttercream off of us with a smile on her face. What wouldn't I do to see her smile one last time? I miss them a lot. I shake this memory from my head and approach my aunt. She has tried so hard to make sure I don't miss my mom, and I really appreciate that. I move closer to her and brush her hair away from her face.

''Ava. Ava Wake up. " As soon as these words left my mouth, she jumped from the counter like the house was being invaded by aliens. Her big brown eyes scanned the whole place before landing on me.

"God. I almost got a heart attack,'' she says, her hand on her chest trying to normalize her breath. I let out a chuckle. She is always paranoid about almost everything. I remember one time I was helping her to dice some vegetables and I accidentally cut a little bit my finger. I ended up that night at the hospital with Ava yelling at the doctors about why I wasn't getting the proper hospital treatment. I will never forget that night.

''So how is the birthday girl feeling? By the way, happy birthday,'' she says, raising her arms and hugging me. Then she got off the chair and started to clean the place.

''Please Ava, don't start with this. You know how much I hate my birthday.'' I say. Since my parents died, I have never been in the mood to celebrate any 'blessed day', as my aunt calls it. It brings so many bad memories, and I am trying to forget them.

''What's wrong, sugarplum?'' she says, cupping my face between her hands. A single tear got out of my eye and I could feel my heart break as soon as these words fell out of her mouth.

''I just miss them so much. I don't know if I can leave with this pain anymore. " I say, hugging her tight, and she hugs me back.

''I know sugarplum. I know.'' She says, petting my head and a few strands of hair and tucking them behind my ear. ''But you know what? I bet they would be sad too to see you in this condition. You know that they wanted the best for you. They wanted to see you happy, living your life to the fullest, and I know for a fact that your mum would have made your birthday cake way better than me.'' She says, and we both laugh at her words. She always manages to make me laugh every time I feel like this.

''Anna." "Luna." "Get your asses downstairs now,'' she yells, and loud footsteps are heard coming into the kitchen. ''Here come the little monsters'' Ava says, pulling out of the hug and going to the fridge to get the cake out and putting it on the counter and putting the candles on. Suddenly, I feel two pairs of hands hugging my legs. It was Anna and Luna. I got to my knees and hugged them tightly.

''Happy Birthday Ivy.'' they both said in one voice, and pulled out of the hug and kissed both my cheeks at the same time. I placed both them a kiss on their forehead and pulled out of the hug as they both went to Ava. Their hair is a mess from sleep. Their faces appeared tired and their little hands were wrapped around Ava's legs. Oh God, how much I want to have a family like that one day.

''So little monsters. How about we sing the birthday song and then eat some cake?'' she says, landing both of them a kiss on the cheek and helping them sit in the chairs.

I could see the excitement in their eyes the moment the word 'cake' was mentioned. Honestly, the only reason I blow out the candles is the smile it puts on their faces. It is the only thing that brings me joy on this day. I love the faces they make when the three of us are together blowing out the candles. Their faces are slightly red from all the effort to blow out the candles. Their small hands are around their faces as they try to blow with all their might. I love them so much.

As soon as we are done singing and eating the cake, I help Ava clean up the mess in the kitchen and wash the dishes.

''So what plans do you have for today? I'm assuming because you skipped school today, does it mean you have plans? Right?'' Ava says, throwing a grape in her mouth and leaning on the counter.

''Not a single one. I plan to sleep for the rest of the day.'' I say, putting the last plate in its proper place.

''Oh come one, you can't just sleep. You know, you can go out with friends. Don't you? " Yeah, I forgot to mention one single detail. Ava doesn't know shit about me skipping almost half of the year. Every time I skip school, I go to the only place I can find peace. It's the only place where I can be alone and no one can bother me.

"Ok, I am going to invite some of my friends to go out with me. Are you happy now?''

''You have no idea. You know that going out with friends can make you forget and can help you be happier.'' No shit. The only thing that people can do to you is crush you. They can make you feel like you are a lost cause and that you would be better off dead. Been there. Done that. And the only conclusion that I have come to is that they don't give a shit about how you feel as long as they look cool in front of the others.

''Yeah, Yeah.'' And with that, I get to my room. I put on an oversize hoodie, some leggings, and sneakers, and head out of the house. I decided to walk. I can go out for a little while and pretend to be with "my friends." I put my ear pods on and put on Tom Rosenthal- God stood me up. God this hits different every time. I started walking and just enjoying the music. I decided to go get some coffee. I got into the first coffee shop my eye caught and got in and got a coffee and a chocolate e muffin. I paid for what I took and got out again.

I decide to take a slow, relaxing walk at the beach, which happens to be my favorite spot. I took my sneakers off and started walking by the shore. The cold water wets my feet, sending shivers through my spine. The sound of the waves is like a melody to my ear. It's a grey day and some clouds were covering the sky, and, to my prediction, soon it will start raining, but I don't care and continue my walk. After almost half an hour of me walking, I spotted a lighthouse in the distance and decided to go there. It looks a bit old, but I bet the view from up there is going to be amusing. As soon as I got there, I tried to find the door. I got all around until I found a little door on the back of it. It was a bit rusty and hard to open, but I managed to open it and got inside. The lighthouse was abandoned but looked like someone had lived here before. The inside of it was poorly decorated but manageable for a human to live in. There was a small bed and a table near it. There were also a lot of personal belongings, but it looked like no one had been here in years.

I got to the top of it using the stairs that were inside the lighthouse. As soon as I got outside, the cold November breeze hit my face. It was cold, but the view in front of me made me forget it. The waves crashed on the rocks beneath me. The view was more wonderful than I imagined. Near me was a rusty chair but it looked in good condition, so I took it and set on it, enjoying the view I had in front of me. I stayed there for hours, enjoying the view. If I die one day, I would like the sea to be part of my paradise.

After almost two hours of me just standing there, I decided to go home. The weather was getting colder and the sky was now completely covered in grey clouds, looking like it was going to rain at any moment. I got out of the lighthouse, making sure to properly close the door, and headed home. As much as I wanted to stay there and stare at that mesmerizing view in front of me for the rest of my life, I had to go home. If Kai finds out I am out without his permission, he is going to kill me. I threw the cup of my coffee, now empty, into the bin and headed home.

A couple of raindrops started to fall, and I hurried up my walk so I could get home faster. After ten minutes, I successfully made it home without getting wet. I got into the building and went straight to the old, crusty elevator and pressed six. As soon as the elevator door opened, I got to the apartment and went to the door knocking before getting in. I got my shoes off, put them in the proper place, and headed to my room, avoiding everyone.

I got to my wardrobe and changed into a pair of grey sweatpants and a grey hoodie before heading out to the kitchen. The house was quiet and I assumed that there was no one there, but as soon as I walked into the kitchen, I faced my aunt and Kai. She was filling a cup of water and Kai was eating his food. Both of them turned to me as soon as I walked into the kitchen, stopping whatever they were talking about.

'' Look who's back. How was your day, sweetheart?'' Ave said to me, giving Kai the glass of water and seating next to him.

''Nothing special,'' I say, heading to the fridge and filling myself a cup of water and drinking it. Kai didn't say anything. He just stood there watching me, his face filled with anger as he took his last bite of the burger. I tried to avoid his gaze and tried to act normally. Kai is Ava's husband. The father of Luna and Anna. And the person I hate with all my being. I put the now empty glass on the sink and as soon as I got to my feet, I faced him. He casually put the plate in the sink, staring at me.

''Happy birthday, sweet cheeks,'' he said, lining up next to me and placing a kiss on my head.

Fucking pervert. I hope he burns in hell.

Always finds an opportunity to touch me. to be near me. He is so fucking disgusting. I got a bit further, so he couldn't kiss me properly, and headed straight to my room without saying anything. I made sure to lock my door and my window before I went to bed. For the rest of the day, I just scrolled on my phone and watched some movies till I could feel my eyes getting tired and I decided to go to sleep.

After an hour of me moving back and forth in my bed, I realized I couldn't sleep. Insomnia sucks sometimes. At one moment, you feel yourself getting tired, and at the same moment, you feel like you can run a whole football field. I got out of bed and started walking around my room, trying to get myself tired but failing. I sat on the end of the bed and just stared at the floor.

It's now 1 am and I'm still at the end of the bed staring at the floor having my daily existential crisis. Sometimes I wish I was a starfish. I get out of bed and walk over to the nightstand. After all my efforts to fall asleep on my own, I concluded that I couldn't, so I had to take the pill. I took the pill out of the nightstand door and looked around for water, but surprisingly, I didn't have it in my room, which meant I had to get out of it. I gather up all my strength and head for the door. I open it quickly and make my way to the kitchen, making sure I don't trip over anything. I reached the kitchen and a sigh of relief escaped my mouth, as luckily no one was there. I reach for the fridge and fill myself with a cup of water before swallowing the medicine and taking a big gulp of water. As I manage to close the refrigerator door, I feel a presence behind me and my body stiffens. I ignore him and continue on my way to the sink, placing the glass there. I felt a hand turn me and another now around my neck, squeezing it tight. I close my eyes in pain as I throw my hands up to free myself from the grip, but fail as I am pushed onto the counter, hitting my back hard.

I fell to the ground. I could feel a sharp pain in my back, but I ignore it as I raise my head to meet the face, which terrifies me to my core.

''How many times have I told you not to go out without my permission?" Heh?'' Kai says as he brings his hand to my neck again, pulling me up. "I asked you a question, sweet cheeks.'' He says, bringing his other hand to my cheeks, squeezing them, making sure to leave a mark. I try to push back my tears and try to stay emotionless, knowing full well that if I cry, things are going to get worse.

''Avvv. Ava told me I should go out with my friend, ssso I did that.'' I manage to say this as his grip tightens around my neck, preventing me from breathing.

''Next time, make sure to ask for my permission. You got me all worried. I'm coming home and not seeing you. Do you know how worried I was?'' He says his voice is acting worried.

''I am sorry.'' And with that, he lets go of me and I put my hands on the counter for support as I try to catch my breath.

''Good girl.'' He says, placing both of his hands on my waist and his nose buried in my hair, taking a deep breath. You're a fucking jerk. I hope you rot in hell.

''I hope you learned your lesson. I hate it when things get to this point, sweet cheeks, but you have to learn your lesson. Am I right?'' He says his head turned a bit to the right.

''Yes sir.'' I manage to say, as he lets go of me and I quickly run to my room. I locked my door and went straight to my bed as I finally let my tears out.

I woke up to a constant pounding on the door. I would like to die in my sleep. I slip out of my covers and slowly get out of bed and walk toward the door.

"Ivy get up." I hear my aunt's voice from the other side of the door still knocking.

"I'm up," I say in a tired voice, not daring to open the door.

"Thank god." I can hear my aunt speaking in a quiet voice. ''Why is the door closed? Are you okay sweetie?''

''Yes. I'm fine.'' I say from behind the door, praying that she won't tell me to open it.

"Alright, honey. When you're ready, come to the kitchen to eat something before you go to school. " after saying this, she left. I went to the mirror in my room and a gasp left my lips. I knew I would have some bruises on my face, but my face was covered with them. There were spots with dark and purple hues. My neck too. I lifted up the back of the shirt and there was also a big bruise on my lower back and it hurt a lot. I tried to hold back the tears and put my shirt down, not wanting to look anymore.

I wore a pair of black leggings and an oversized black hoodie. I put my hood over my head to cover my face since I didn't have any makeup to cover it. I grabbed my backpack and reached for my door and tried to open it slowly. I managed to get out of my room without anyone seeing me and ran to the bathroom so I could brush my teeth and wash my face.

After I finished washing my face and teeth, I left the bathroom. I hear footsteps coming from the kitchen, and I slowly lower my head and pull the hood a little further to cover my face. I get to where we keep our shoes and kneel down to put on my sneakers. Suddenly, I feel a hand on my shoulder, and I don't dare turn my face. Fear overwhelms me and I start to panic.

"Ivy I told you to come and eat something before you go," says my aunt.

''No thanks, I'm not hungry. Plus I'll be late for school.'' I say, putting on my other shoe and standing up to my full height, and heading for the door. ''Goodbye. See you after school. I love you.'' and with that, I leave the house and head for the elevator. I press the button and after a few seconds, the door does not open. God hates this old building. I started to go down the stairs and made sure not to trip myself and bruise my face even more. I successfully got to the bottom of the stairs and went to the main door. As soon as I stepped out of the building, the cold November air hit my face, sending shivers down my body.

I take my air pods from my pocket that my aunt bought me with her savings and put them in my ears and put on some music. I started walking to my school because I couldn't afford a bus. I know it's embarrassing, but I spent the last of my savings on renovating my bedroom so I could at least have a bed to sleep on. After half an hour, I arrived at this hell hole. I entered the school, making sure my hood was covering my face, and headed to my locker, to put on my combination. I open and pick up the books I will have for today. I could hear my name being called, but I decided to ignore it and turn up the music volume. I closed the locker and turned to go to my class, but as soon as I turned, I bumped into someone. I let out a sigh of frustration and didn't bother to look up, but failed because just as I tried to walk to my classroom, a hand grabbed me and pulled me back, slamming my back against the lockers.

"Where are you going?" a voice is heard. I still keep my head down, knowing exactly who it is. Emily has been a pain in the ass since first grade, and since she started dating Roman, she hasn't left me alone. Apparently, she's been jealous of me even for breathing, and I have no idea why. It still confuses me.

"Emily, please, I don't have time to deal with you. I have a class to attend.'' I say and try to go where I had to go, but I fail again because I was slammed into the lockers again.

"Oh, come on. Why don't we have a little chat? I really missed you yesterday. " I get my head up and stare directly at her. God, I don't want to deal with her. Not today. I see two of her minions behind her glaring at me and some of the boys from the football team behind her leaning against the wall. And here is Roman. The boy I hate with all my being. We used to be friends, but after my parents died, I just become distant and he didn't seem to have a problem with that. Ever since he joined the football team he started to become more and more popular at school and all the girls would fall on their knees just to talk to him. I on the other hand couldn't care less. I mean there are a lot of guys with tall and muscular bodies. His mesmerizing green eyes that I could stare at for the rest of my life. His plumb lips and his gorges smile witch shows a perfect view of his white pearly teeth. God. What the hell am I thinking? I hate guys. I hate this guy and nothing can change my mind. My eyes went back to Emily who was looking at me like she was going to kill me at any moment. Good luck with that one. If she wants some little chat, I'll give her a 'little chat'.

"Hey, Emily. How are you? I like what you did with your hair today.'' I say this with a sarcastic tone and a fake smile on my face.

"Well thank you," she says, taking some hair in her hand and twirling it on her finger. This bitch is desperate for some attention.

''How do you get it to come out of the nostrils like that?'' I say, looking down at her nostrils with a confused look. Some chuckles are heard from behind, and I take a look and my eyes fall on Roman, who has a hand to his mouth trying to contain his laughter.

''You little shit. You think you're funny, heh,'' she says, grabbing my hand. A smirk is now on my face. ''But guess what. You full of shit."

''Oh come on, we all know who's full of shit here. You're making even the toilets jealous.'' I said, forcing my hand out of her grip and heading to my class with out saying another word.

************************************************************************

This is my last class. Music. The only reason I come to school on Mondays and Thursdays. I go to the classroom, and to my surprise, it is empty. I take my place and wait for the others to come. After a couple of minutes, no one comes, and my eyes fall on the piano in the corner of the classroom. I like to play the piano. It's basically the reason I breathe. The only good thing left in my miserable life. I looked at it and it was dying to be played. I give up the urge not to play it and drop my backpack on my seat and walk over to the piano and sit on the small stool. I open the fallboard and run my fingers to the keys. I miss this feeling.

I started playing my favorite song, Jamie Duffy- Solas. I was enjoying the sweet melody coming from the piano, but as I was playing, I saw a shadow out of the corner of my eye and immediately stopped playing and turned my head. The person who was standing there was now completely gone. I got up from the stool and went to get my bag and left the classroom. Since I had no other classes to attend, I headed home. On the way, I made sure to stop to get something to eat before heading home.

I entered the house and immediately went to my room. I hate it when I try to avoid others, but I can't go out in front of my aunt in this state.

I undressed and put on my pajamas and went to my bed to start my homework. I hate assignments, but it's the least I can do if I want to pass. Tomorrow I will try to convince the principal, to give me some extra work to make up for the days I have missed. Hopefully he agrees. A light knock was heard on the door of my room.

''Ivy. Do you want me to make you something to eat, honey?''

"No thanks, Ava, I've got something on the way home."

"Okay honey," she said, and the sound of her footsteps began to fade. I continued with my homework.

It's already 9 pm and I'm exhausted. I put all the books on the small table and lay down to sleep. The moon was full, and the stars shone brighter than ever. I miss my parents. A lot. I don't want to live in this house anymore. I don't want to be afraid to go somewhere because a monster decided to make my life a living hell. I want a normal life like all the other people my age, but it seems I'm only destined to suffer. A few tears came out of my eyes, and I cried myself to sleep.