Alpha Jaxon Second Chance Mate

PAIN.

Sometimes pain is all I feel. Not the physical kind but the emotional kind. The heart wrenching, soul destroying kind.

Has your heart ever hurt so much that you thought it might actually explode?

It was like a void in your heart that can never be fixed. A hole that burns so deep that you don't think you could ever be okay again.

Happiness is nothing but a distant memory for me. Half my soul is missing and I will never be able to fill the empty space again.

It has been nine months since I watched as my beautiful mate was murdered right in front of me. There was nothing I could do to stop what they did to her but I still blame myself everyday.

All I remember was the screaming... the endless screaming. From her. From me.

I hate myself more everyday. Half my soul was gone, my mate was gone. The heartache was unbearable, it still is today. Being an Alpha doesn't make it better, it just makes things worse.

I know I've been hard on my pack since she passed away but what do they expect? My life and my future was gone and she was never coming back.

Nothing could make me feel okay again and I that was the only thing I was sure of.

-

"Alpha Jaxon," Kayden the Beta to my pack addresses me as he strolls into my office uninvited.

I scowl looking up at him through my dark hooded eyes. "What do you want?" I almost spit at him.

My attention is focused back to my desk, there was nothing I hated more than being bothered.

"I just wanted to know if you'd have dinner with us? It's been a long time sinc-" I cut him off before he has the time to finish his sentence.

My hands start to ball into fists on my desk as I squeeze the pen tightly between my fingers. "Kayden, would you just leave me alone? I have no intention of joining you for dinner. Not now, not ever."

Kayden's face turns to a sympathetic look. "I know you miss her Jaxon but we miss you too. I think you should start trying to have dinner with us. We want to be there for you and su-"

Holding my hand up to him as my eyes now burn with fury. "Don't finish that sentence."

"But Alph-" He starts again.

I almost let a growl leave my lips at his inability to listen to what I'm saying."You have no idea how I feel Kayden! You have no right to come into my office and tell me what I should be doing!" My voice booms around the room and Kayden flinches at my tone.

Raising to my feet in anger as I push the chair out from underneath of me, my chest was heaving.

"I didn't meant to upset you Jaxon," Kayden says as he quickly fumbles to open my door and abruptly exits.

I swing my fist into the lamp on my desk, letting it hit the wall with such force is shatters into pieces before me. A scream leaves my lips, letting all my emotions out. All the emotions that are crawling through my body like trapped poison constantly making me think like a psychopath.

The ones that paralyse me everyday.

Sadness.

Guilt.

Regret.

Before I can even think about my actions I storm across my office and out the door. Flying down the stairs, not bothering to say anything to anyone.

"Jaxon!" I hear my sister, Lucy call out to me.

I have to ignore her because I wasn't going to lose my shit around her, around them. They've taken the hit far too many times and I hated myself for it but the pain in my chest just never goes away. This is the only way I know how to deal with it. Grieving is never easy, anyone who says it gets better is a liar.

Opening our glass front door and forcefully shut it behind me. The cool crisp air whips against the skin on my arms, not even bothering that I hadn't brought a jacket.

Once I reach my car I sit inside for a few seconds, my eyes gather tears but I don't let them fall. My hands reach up to secure them around the leather wheel and I tighten.

Biting down on my jaw as my vision turns blurry and my ears ring with distress. A scream erupts from my chest as I hit the wheel multiple times in anger. My knuckles begin to pulsate in pain as I aggressively punch the wheel over and over.

My fingers fumble with the keys and I race out of the drive as quickly as I can. I wish I could just run out into the woods and shift into my wolf and spend the evening with nature. But I couldn't.

When Julia died, my wolf did too.

He's still there, somewhere inside me. I just haven't seen him for nine months, I haven't felt him, his instincts, his feelings. He just completely died inside of me.

I know that he's weak and heartbroken, he doesn't want to be seen because he's trying to heal. I'm envious of him in that sense, I would do anything to just be alone without anyone bothering me.

What was the point in living without your mate? The only thing that could ever make you feel complete.

I wasn't sure where exactly I was driving to, my mind needed a distraction and a change of scenery. Turning left onto an empty road, the night was dark, the sky full of clouds and not a single star in sight.

The road started to become narrow and the trees getting taller around me. A hand rakes it's way through my hair as I try to think of anything but Julia.

Why was life never simple?

My nose begins to tingle as a soft scent swarms me, my senses become sensitive and my arms raise in goosebumps. Sitting up straight in my seat, I squint my eyes at the dimly lit road ahead of me.

The smell was faint but it was beautiful, a subtle scent of vanilla mixed with chestnut.

I kept questioning where it was coming from as the smell was becoming stronger by the second. Pins and needles start to develop in my hand and I take one hand off the steering wheel and stretch it quickly.

The shadows of the trees were reflecting down onto the ground, blowing in the wind softly. I slow down slightly because something didn't feel right.

My eyes snap to the side of the road as the bushes begin to rustle. The scent was even stronger now, I almost felt suffocated by it.

My foot slams on the breaks when a young girl emerges from the bushes, running across the road with a slight limp.

As she crosses the road my car almost hits her, I try my best do swerve but there was nowhere to go on this narrow road. Instead she slams her hands down on the hood of the car and looks through the windscreen in fear.

Her whole body was shaking, her tiny frame covered in cuts and bruises. The scent was so intense, my heart began to race rapidly inside my chest.

My eyes capture her dark brown willow eyes.

Mate.

My wolf inside me speaks as my lips part briefly in complete and utter shock.

Holy fuck.

Her terrified eyes are wide and alert, I watch as she rips her hands off the hood and darts into the woods again.

I quickly open my car door and step out. "Wait!" I yell after her.

Her little legs carry her fast, I see the fear practically dripping off her with every step. She was shaking violently, her head whipping around to see how close I was to her.

Taking big strides to catch up, she turns again and looks at me in panic. Her breathing hitches as she attempts to run quicker, her feet dodging the tree roots in the floor.

Managing to get level with her, her eyes look up at me in shock as stops right in her tracks. Her clothes were dirty and ripped like she had been neglected.

I stop in front of her and I watch as she takes small shaky steps backwards, her foot treads down onto a branch as it cracks under her weight. Her whole body loses balance and she falls down onto her back, a quiet hiss comes out of her mouth.

Instantly rushing to her assistance but she scurries away from me, stopping when her back hits a tree harshly. Her eyes glisten with tears which soon fall down her cheeks, against her pale broken skin.

"P-Please don't hurt me," her her voice begs quietly.

As I bend down to her level she flinches at how close we are, she shields her face behind her knees. "I'm not going to hurt you," I tell her softly, my tone trying to sound sincere.

Her breathing becomes harsher, continuing to try and push herself away from me. Her brown eyes hesitantly wander over my face and watch my body actions carefully.

"It's okay," I say. "I won't hurt you."

Turning back to to my car for a split second to see how far away I had parked, I see her run off again in the corner of my eye.

"Hey!" I yell as I shoot up to chase after her.

Managing to grab her delicate wrist and stop her. I can't help but notice the tingles that raced through my hands when I touched her skin. Having to stop my eyes from closing in pleasure, a feeling that felt all too familiar.

"Please," she begs as I feel her body shake with fear. "Please, just let me go."

Instantly noticing how her bottom lip quivers and tears fall endlessly from her terrified eyes. Afraid that I could do unspeakable things to her.

"You're hurt and you're clearly in danger. Please just let me help you. I'm not going to hurt you." I try to plead with her but I understood how hard it must be for her to trust someone with the state that she's in.

There was no way I was going to just let her disappear into the night, not knowing if she's safe or if people are after her.

She shakes her head vigorously. "I'm not going anywhere with you." She cries out and tries to shake the grip I have on her wrist.

Lucy, I need your help. Right now. I demand through mindlink.

Looking back down to my mate, her eyes staring back at me wearily. Her chest was heaving and her breathing loud. "I am not going to hurt you." I whisper down to her. "I could never hurt you."

Her eyebrows slightly furrow at my words and she pulls her head back. "I don't believe you," her voice wobbles.

Whats wrong? Are you okay? Lucy's mindlink pings back.

Quickly taking in my surroundings I tell my sister where I am, describing that she'll see my car on the edge of the road.

Okay, be 5 minutes. She rushes.

"Okay, that's fine you don't need to believe me right now." I gently, my voice trying not to sound patronising. "But one day you will trust me."

She shakes her head. "Why are you saying this?" She sounds confused, her face scrunching up. "You don't know me!"

Her words scream distress and I didn't even want to think about the things that she had been through. "I know you don't know me but it will make sense soon, you will be safe now." I nod to her.

"Please, I don't want this. I just want to get away. Please." She begs again, her voice becoming hysterical with sobs.

I open my mouth to talk but I am cut off by Lucy's voice in my head.

Jaxon, we are here. Is it safe?

Yes.

Lucy and Sebastian emerge from the direction of my car.

"What's going on?" Lucy asks as she rushes to my side and eyes the girl that I have a grip of.

"I'll explain later," I mumble to her. Turning back to my mate as she looks at Lucy and Sebastian with uncertainty. "This is my sister and her boyfriend." I say to her.

"We want to help you, please let us help you." I say to her, my fingers moving up her arm slightly for better grip.

"Get off of me you psychopath!" She screams before realising what she has said and quickly shields herself from me.

My hear shatters as I think about how she was expecting me to hit her. "Hey," I say tugging her arm gently so she looks at me, her eyes struck with fear. "I'm not going to hurt you."

I turn to my sister. "Sleep," I whisper not loud enough for my mate to hear and Lucy nods her head.

"Wait, wait wait!" My mate screams as Lucy stands in front of her and closes her eyes. She waves her hands over my mates face and chants in her head.

Lucy was blessed with the talents of being a healer, in which she can put somebody to sleep with a spell. Almost like telepathic sleeping gas, it has come in handy many times.

I watch as my mates eyes fall droopy and I quickly catch her limp body in my arms. She was tiny compared to me and she looked like she needed a decent meal. Her body felt like a bag of bones and it was the worst thing to see.

"Want to tell me what the hell is going on?" Lucy yells at me and I flick my eyes to Sebastian who is also looking back at me confused.

"Get in the car, we will talk at home." I mumble as I carry my mate away from the clearing

-

Once we are back at the pack house, I carry my mate up to the guest room. Letting her body down onto the bed, she was frail and I was terrified of what she had been through.

"Jaxon?" Lucy gets my attention quietly but her voice still comes out loud. "Are you going to tell us what on Earth is going on?"

Pressing a finger to my lips as I frown at her. "She's still sleeping." I whisper.

I watch as one of Lucy's eyebrows flexes at me and her hands find the way to her hips.

She's my mate.

Lucy's eyes instantly go wide at my words "Excuse me?!" She says out loud, not even registering she has.

"Shhh!" I say harshly towards her.

She's your mate?

Yes.

How?

I don't know but she is and I know she is.

Lucy's eyes wander down to my mate.

"What's her name?" She asks and I quickly shrug.

"I'm not sure, we didn't quite get to that point." I sigh and watch as my mates breath becomes more rigid and harsh. "But I just know that whatever she has gone through, it's been hell."

My fists begin to tense and I can't help but grit my teeth in anger at the way that she has been mistreated.

I turn to look back at Lucy. "When she wakes up, can you be here please? She's terrified and maybe seeing another girl will calm her down." I say, my voice full of hope because that's what I needed right now.

Lucy nods instantly. "Of course." She wanders over to the bed and perches gently down beside me.

Her hand reaches up to grip mine and she squeezes. "I can't believe this, this is just crazy." She breathes out not looking at me, her eyes stay firmly on my mate.

"I know," I whisper. "Me either."

My mate stirs from her sleep and I slowly move closer to her, attempting not to let her feel startled. When she sees me standing by the door she sits up from the sheets in fear and pushes herself into the headboard.

"Hey, hey hey!" I say quietly. "It's okay."

Her head shakes vigorously at me, her body shaking again.

She's awake. I mindlink Lucy.

On my way.

"I'm not going to hurt you." My eyes plead with hers but I knew that my words were no use, she wasn't going to believe me right now.

A million different scenarios run through my head with the things that she could have been through. How could they make someone feel so terrified of life, of other people?

Lucy approaches the room quietly but my mate still jumps at her entrance, her eyes flicking between the both of us.

"Hi," Lucy says gently as she smiles down to her and stands beside me. "What's your name?" Lucy asks as she approaches the bed.

My mates eyes cloud with fear and I watch as she bites her lip, hard enough to draw blood.

"I'm Lucy," She introduces herself as she presses her hand to her chest. "And this is Jaxon." Lucy turns to me.

I don't take my eyes off her, the fear in her face making me feel sick to my stomach.

"What's your name?" Lucy asks again and moves closer to her.

She holds her hands up to defend herself and lets out a shaky breath. "It's Ava," her voice is croaky and quiet. "Just p-please don't hurt me!"

"We would never hurt you Ava." Lucy's tone dips quietly.

Ava's eyes soften at Lucy's voice, the presence of a woman is probably calming her down.

"We want to help you," she says.

I shuffle my body closer towards Ava slightly, her head whips to me and she backs up into the headboard even more. "It's okay," I say as I stupidly reach for her.

Her eyes widen and she leaps over the bed and straight into the bedside table, the lamp crashing onto the floor with a loud thud. Everything happened so fast that I could barely register what just happened.

"Jesus, Jaxon!" Lucy shouts at me as she runs over to Ava.

I quickly follow her steps and my eyes study my mates frame as she lays on the floor, she's crying again and I feel like the worst person in the world. She didn't trust me, I shouldn't have made any move to try and touch her.

"Please don't try to run Ava," Lucy says desperately. "It will only make things worse, we aren't the bad guys."

"I don't believe you!" She snarls out my sister, fear etching in her skin. She swipes her hand out and attempts to stand up but I grab her wrists and restrain her.

"Get off me!" She cries out and my heart breaks at the sight of her discomfort.

"I can't," I say over her distressed groans as she tries to fight me off. "You're going to hurt yourself."

She twists and turns under me, her whole face turning red as she struggles. I look into her dark brown eyes and the tears that slipped down her face, they never stopped.

Her arms press against mine in an attempt to get away from me again but her strength has nothing on mine. "Lucy, please put her to sleep. She is gonna hurt herself again." I say desperately, not knowing what else to do.

Lucy nods at my words, I wish I knew how to deal with this situation better but I had no other choice. She closes her eyes and I watch as my mate soon relaxes onto the floor.

I scoop her up in my arms and place her back down on the bed gently. A deep sigh leaves my lips as I stare down to her body, I glance at Lucy and she offers me a small smile.

"You shouldn't restrain her like that, she obviously has a big problem with being touched." She tells me.

I wanted to scream at her but I stop myself. "What do you want me to do Lucy? If I don't restrain her she'll run out into the woods again and I'll never be able to find her!" I hiss out.

"By restraining her you're not going to earn her trust, you need to set limits and boundaries. Get her to start feeling comfortable." She folds her arms over her chest, she's so much better in situations like this than I am. She thinks logically, I just panic.

"I know I do," I say to her.

Lucy closes her eyes for a brief moment and sighs. "I also think you need to remember that she isn't Julia and she never is going to be."

I narrow my eyes at my sister in a deathly glare. "Don't you think I know that?" I say through gritted teeth.

"I just don't want you to hurt her, she isn't stable." She says sternly.

"How could you think I'd hurt my own mate?" I say as I shake my head disbelief.

"Not physically Jaxon, emotionally. You might not be ready for a new relationship, you and Julia loved each other. I know that you still love her, but Ava she nee-" I cut her off before she finished.

"Stop!" I yell through my alpha-tone which makes my sister flinch slightly.

"When life gives you second chances, you don't take it for granted. I'm gonna find out what happened to that girl and I'm gonna show her a good life Lucy, whether it kills me or not." My voice states.

I could hear Lucy's thoughts in the air, questioning why I was so willing to be nice to this girl when I hadn't even had a proper conversation with her. But when you feel the mate bond between you, there isn't any point in trying to explain because the feelings are too strong to describe.

I've always believed in the saying, everything happens for a reason. And no matter how horrible the event or outcome is, I still live by this.

"And how are you gonna do that, when she practically shakes at the sight of you?" She shakes her head at me slightly. "It's going to take her days if not weeks to open up!"

"I want you to help me," I tell her.

Lucy's eyebrows furrow. "Huh?"

"Show me what she's been through."

"Nope, no way. You're on your own with this one." She says as she begins to walk out the door.

Along with Lucy's healing powers, she can see into a persons past. Her powers are beyond amazing and I'm jealous that she has inherited something so powerful. Our mother has powers very similar, except I didn't inherit anything. Only my dads Alpha title.

"Lucy, please." I beg.

"Do you know how wrong that is Jaxon? The things she has been through isn't any of our business, we're doing this unethically." She tells me.

"You're right, it might take weeks to get her to open up to us but what if she's in danger? What if someone is looking for her? We are putting our whole pack, ourselves and her at risk. I'm not asking to know everything, I just want to know where she's come from and if she's in danger." I say as I let my tone drop.

She turns back to me slowly and she sighs. Running a hand through her hair, I can sense she is debating her options.

"Please," I say again.

"I can't always control the things I see Jaxon, what if I see something that I shouldn't have? It's not fair." Lucy's eyes flick between mine with worry.

"I know but you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to, okay? I want to be as respectful as possible to her, I just want to know who the hell has done this to her. We'll gain her trust after." I nod towards my sister.

Lucy nibbles her lip as she decides. "Okay," she says eventually and lips twitch into an appreciated smile. "But I'm not explaining this to her or how you know, that's all on you." She says as she narrows her eyes at me.

"That's fine with me,"

She sits down on the bed and holds my mates hands between hers and closes her eyes.