Aesha Roxinne Flinn

If there is something I hate about life, it is its unfairness to the people.

It is in the middle of the night, and I am here watching a massacre.

Guns, blood, knives, swords.

Life and Death.

And here I am watching everything before my eyes, hiding below a compartment.

Just above I can have a glimpse of everything that is about to happen.

My mother is lying on the floor, helpless and weak. With her clothes torn into parts.

German is on the ground kneeling with his body wounded, but the amount of blood leaving his shoulders cannot be ignored above it all.

And my father, harshly wounded, having that ridiculous smirk on his face looking at the person standing above us.

My tears are unstoppable for an hour. Scared and traumatized. But the amount I am shedding for this very moment is nothing compared to the pain digging in my heart.

Mom. Dad. What is happening?

I tried hard to bite my hand to prevent myself from the rage and shouting when suddenly the woman held my mom up again and ripped the clothes out of my mother's body.

I looked at my father again, and saw his smirk fading but is still there. Him, facing the nothingness in front and the darkness of his eyes didn't leave him.

But something is different because I saw the hollowness in it.

I turned my eyes on my mom again because I am too scared I do not know my father anymore. I saw how my mom is letting everything that is about to happen to her but the tears flowing in her cheeks couldn't escape my eyes. And it seemed that those tears trigger more tears in my eyes.

My lovely mother.

Mom.

I sobbed and sobbed in silence, hardly preventing myself to make a sound. Feeling all the extra pain my heart is experiencing now.

We were just laughing a while ago. How did we end up like this?

How pure she is to be painted with bruises. How lovely she is to be able to experience this?

I saw the woman raise my mom's arms, her eyes traveled to my mom's body. Walking her fingers in every part with wounds, bruises, and blood my mother is having.

"You really a gorgeous woman Allison, too bad you will die now, " I heard the woman say then she lowered my mom's arm gently.

As if she never said my mother is to die.

I watched her walked between the tiny space between my mother and German. Uncareful walking. Making her step on German's arms.

I heard German grunt, but I knew the pain from a wounded arm stepped by those heels, can make him feel more than just a grunt. She turned her back again to face my mother and smiled.

That mocking smile.

I memorized how she looked like. I sketched all of her in my mind.

I will never forget. I will never ever forget.

She clapped her hand to catch the attention of her audience.

"Okay. So now that the opening party has ended. I will never make you wait for any greetings and blah-blah-blah-ba-blah event that needs to happen. Those are just unimportant ones. "

She surveyed the room and laughed again "Let us now proceed to the end. The closing program".

I watched how her eyes turned different with the overwhelming joy she is feeding right now.

"But of course, let me give you a summary, a short introduction again. To formally end the program. This is Allison Flinn." she paused and looked at my mother.

"And she is in her most beautiful form tonight. Right?"

No one answered. No one dared to talk.

I saw how she was irritated when she got no response from anyone in return, so with a few steps, she is in front of German, twisting his head to make him forcefully look at my mom.

But German immediately closed his eyes. Tight. Even when the woman is going impatient making him see my mom.

"Open your damn eyes!" that's a loud shouting and her neck veins started to appear.

But she got no response at all, so she decided to touch German's wounded shoulder, inserted those long nails, making her best to open German's eyes.

But he didn't. Even after a while he still didn't.

I saw how he handled the pain by himself. With his eyes never opening.

The woman suddenly stood up and moved her head left and right. Feeling it tick as she swayed it like a morning exercise.

"You are one stubborn man, " she finally said.

I saw her raise her hand. One of his men attend to her and gave her a white handkerchief which she used to wipe the blood out of her hands.

"Since you annoyed me tonight, you do not need to be introduced properly, so let's skip you and now proceed- " she smiled the widest

"to Mr. Luther Flinn, "

I looked at my father again and noticed how his smirk is replaced by a grin I couldn't decipher.

"You didn't inform me you are visiting today. I should have prepared a lot of food for you and your companions." I heard my father say even when he's voice is not that stable anymore. His eyes surveyed the room.

"You even organized the event for my family. Don't you think you needed permission from the owner of where you choose to be the venue? "

I couldn't understand my father's words. I couldn't follow what he is thinking right now. But I saw him smile, looking at the woman. Mocking the woman. Belittling her with his very possible way.

The woman got annoyed. She then walked towards my father, holding him up in the collar helplessly.

"Don't act so strong and casual on me now Luther. I know how fake your mask is now. Watching your home fall. Watching your family struggle their last breaths!" she said, pushing my father's body hard.

Then pulled it again to make my father face my mother right now.

"How hurtful it is to see your light fade its light hmm? How hurtful it is to watch her lose her bright life."

She placed her hands on her cheeks and watch both of them like a funny pet show she loves to see.

I watched how my mother stretch a smile at my father. Followed by tears flowing again in her eyes. And then smiled again trying to touch my father's face.

I couldn't see my father's face right now for his body is turned back at me and all I can see is my mother's hopeless situation.

I saw my mother's lips move and it seemed like she is saying something but the movement of her lips are too small to make me understand it.

Then I found her eyes briefly looking at the eyehole I am looking through now.

She smiled at it knowingly. Like she knows I am here all along. Like she know her smile would make me feel something I was deprived of in this situation.

Motherly love.

I cried hard wanting to go out on this cage. I cried hard wanting to soothe all her pain away. I cried hard, scared that this situation will take her away from me.

With all the blurring tears in my eyes, I saw her nod at German and smiled, before she closed her eyes.

Ang just after a few seconds, I heard a loud bark of laughter that made me fear.

And angry.

That was my father's.

That was my father's!

I couldn't believe how he can laugh at this kind of matter! I can't believe he can just laugh when it seems like my mother is being stripped from me! Dying!

My heart wavered and rage inside me is filling me. My mother is dying and he is out there, laughing like a mad man!

After a minute of laughing I watch him wipe the tears in his eyes from the laughing he just made.

"Is that all you got, huh? " he asked and I again cannot believe how he can say that.

The woman's face showed how she is deeply annoyed at how my father goes unaffected by the situation so she pulled the sword out of his men and swung it directly in my mom's direction.

My eyes grew wide from the sight. With my hands in my mouth, I shouted her name and my disapproval of what is about to happen. That was the loudest cry I cried and it has escaped my covering hands.

But before the sword reach her body and at the moment my cries goes louder and louder I heard a loud thud above. The hole is being covered by a large body- hiding me from the scene I was about to see.

With the person's blood dripping on my face.

I punched and punched my chest to stop me from shouting. To stop me from hurting.

But it is very useless. In fact it seemed to trigger more tears in my eyes.

Mom!

Please... no. Don't.

I threw my weakening body on the floor.

Then after that, a while of silence happened.

Minutes after, the place is suddenly filled with gunshots and steps I couldn't count. Walking, running- and running again.

The eyehole is emptied again.

It was a long while before it stops. And even if I'm scared and shaking, I pecked through it and saw my mom's peaceful face lying on the floor.

Without thinking a second of whether there are people outside or I will die going out of this place, I opened it with all my might and ran to hold and embrace my mom.

Her pale skin was covered with bruises. Her hair is disheveled. Her body, naked, and brutally painted with wounds. I couldn't even say a word aside from "mom", as my lips are trembling to look for her breathing which I fail to see.

I reached for those dead bodies and ripped. And ripped and ripped the fabrics of the clothes they are wearing. Neverminding the lines slicing in my hands.

My mother doesn't deserve this. I better make her beautiful again.

I should make her wear clothes like how she does to me.

She said a woman's body is sacred and should be treated with the best care. So I have to treat hers with extra care and cover her beauty not everyone deserves to see!

With my shaking hands, I've successfully made her body covered with the pieces I've ripped. They are stained by blood, by other people's blood, and mine.

My mother is dressed with blood.

My body is convulsing at the sight.

I laid down. Reached for her and embraced her. I cried in her chest. I cried hard with all of my heart.

My heart is clenching, beating fast. My breathing is labored. My face is painted by the drips of blood.

And my mother turns into a canvass- with blood, bruises, and wounds as the paintbrush.

I was too drained and weak that's why when I saw the knob move, I just closed my eyes, anticipating my death.

"His daughter is her-"

But the voice is interrupted by a gunshot. And gunshots again.

Upon opening my eyes, I saw new numbers of bodies added, dead on the floor.

I searched the room but found no one responsible for the shooting.

Another man entered and aimed his gun at me, but I saw German on his back- and he is faster than him.

Headshot. He shot him in the head.

And I saw it with my bare eyes.

I would be lying if I'll say that it didn't scare me, terrified me. But witnessing the scene where the sword is swayed at my mom is something that made me less terrified to the death I just witnessed now.

Like it is nothing compared to how terrified and ultimately scared I was a while ago.

I looked at the blood flowing in his head, and it made me feel blank for a moment until something snapped at me.

Mom.

My mom needs me!

Then I stood up. Made it fast to carry my mom out of this place, out of this chaotic place. But with one try I almost kiss the ground. I couldn't carry her!

I am too weak!

German rushed towards me and he carried my mom out of the room. We walked fast but with extreme caution. German is silently observing any movement from the different angles of the house.

But halfway from the hall, I turned back.

Aware of my sudden turn, German turn look at my full appearance and to where I am heading.

"Miss," he called me.

I looked at him and saw how critical his condition is too. His shoulder is still bleeding, but he has a machine gun hanging on it while carrying my mom. The strap of it is drenched in blood.

"Where are you going? " he asked, renewing his hold on mom.

I shook my head and did my best to get rid of the lump in my throat.

"I need to go back. Please, " I begged.

"But that room and the way towards that room and is dangerous now. It will be hard for us to-"

My tears welled up and flowed again to my cheeks. I need to go back! I have to! That is the last thing I had to do for my mom!

"Please! " I cried again.

He looked through me. I looked at him too. And as soon as he nods his head I sprinted all the way to enter that room again.

I've stepped a lot of dead bodies but I couldn't care more as I know I should move faster because German, even if he's not saying it, is getting weaker and weaker for all the wounds he acquired and all the blood he lose in this battle.

Earlier, after he carried mom, I saw something fell. I saw it but I was too occupied earlier to leave, that's why I failed to notice it.

I searched on the floor. Kicking anything that will make me slow to find it. Until I saw it.

It was a necklace and it is clipped in a gun.

Without a second thought, I picked it up and felt the cold metal on my skin. The coldness it introduced in my system made me almost drop it on the floor.

I held it tight and urged myself to get up. This is not the time for me to slow German down.

I rushed towards the door to follow German but as soon as I step out of it, I came face to face with a man, only a few meters away from me, and his gun is positioned to fire at me.

I hid the gun behind me and waited for the shot to take me but from afar I saw how German skillfully raises another gun and fire it away targeting the man's neck before the man even pulls the trigger to shoot me.

I saw German throw the gun away and at my best speed, I ran towards him.

We both walked fast. And I do not know how many dead bodies we stepped into just to reach the parking lot.

Funny of me to think that we will be safe once we get out of the mansion. Because the moment we step outside I heard gunshots again, and we immediately hid ourselves in the cars.

Breathing heavily, I looked at mom and German. His veins are showing and he is critically bleeding!

"You are bleeding! " I exclaimed at him even though I am aware that he is aware of it too. And that mentioning it now, is so silly of me when it's been a while since I've been seeing him bleed.

He faced me, still breathing heavily as he assesses our current situation.

"Just a small wound," he said, smiling at me.

Probably to make the atmosphere lighter for me.

I smiled a little too to acknowledge his effort.

But that was short-lived.

Both of those smiles dropped as the shooting begins again. Making us realize the reality we are currently facing.

He moved something on his machine gun as he faced me again.

"Could you please hold your mom for a while, " he said as he lay my mom in my lap.

He suddenly stood up and fired his machine gun, like a machine gun maniac with his grin plastered all over his face.

If only I do not know him, I would be too scared for my life.

But I do, so instead of watching him, I focused my eyes to fix mom's position.

She is so pale now. Her lips weren't as cherry red as before. And even with the shots and loud creepy laughs German is giving now, I cannot help myself but to cry again looking at how lifeless she is now.

She's gone.

My mother is gone.

I hit my chest repeatedly, hoping the pain will fade away but it won't stop. I clenched my fist on my shirt and felt all the suffering again as I hold her in my arms-dead.

Why did they need to take away the life of the people who only wanted to live in the world happily?

Why did life take her away from me like this? I couldn't understand...

Why did we have to end up like this?

After a few minutes, German ended his firing and looked down at me. His smile fade away at the sight, he immediately carried mom out of my lap.

"We should get going. Fast. Now. "

We walked again, taking advantage of the falling men and our men exchanging shots with the enemies.

He led us to a large monster car and the moment we entered, he drove it out fast.

I removed the hair from my mom's face and although her face is cold I caressed it. Let my tears fall in it.

"Mom, can you please tell me a story? " my voice broke knowing that she can never tell me one anymore.

And I cried again.

I noticed German's staring in the side mirror. A witness of my pathetic situation, on how pitiful I am.

I do not know how long I've been grieving when the car suddenly stopped. My eyes flew to the window, and I notice some people outside, including my dad.

We are in a forest I am not familiar with, and it is dark that they need flashlights to see each other.

German opened the door for me. He is also the one who carried mom out, placing her into a bed I do not know where is from.

Weak, I look at dad, asking for an answer. A help.

But in the dark, he is too stoic and emotionless.

His lips were in a grim line looking at my mom. I saw no single tear fall from his eyes or even a mark of tears on his cheeks.

His eyes are just red.

I wanted to jump and hug him but something is stopping me from going. It is like he was in a too dark state.

I've never seen him fit so perfectly in the dark.

And it scared me.

After minutes of just staring at him, he didn't even dare to look at my eyes.

Why is he so indifferent?

This is the time I needed him most!

He sure is with me tonight but I couldn't feel him. He wouldn't even take a step to get near me or hush me or even dare to look back at me.

Men carried my mom, and instead of wasting my time pleading for attention and affection he cannot give, I directed my eyes on mom again.

Mom, why is he being like that to me?

My tears fell again and I cried in silence as I watch the thing get her into the ground.

My tears fell more, hoping to turn back the time when we were happy baking in the kitchen,

dressing up for an event,

tickling each other till we ran out of breath,

and all those happy memories of the family we built for years.

Weak, my body made me kneel on the ground that I almost fall together with my mom but German caught me and removed me away from it.

How will I live my life now?

I cried again in German's arms but despite my blurring sight, I looked up at my father once again.

Dad.

I. Am. Hurting.

Where are you?

But he didn't move a bit. He didn't caress me and tell me that everything will be alright. He didn't hold me or embrace me to make me feel his warmth on this cold night. Instead, he just turned his back on me as if he is about to leave.

As if I am just nothing to him. As if he is not seeing me, vulnerable in the dark.

"Dad. Please, " I begged again even when I am clueless why I need to beg him at this point.

I saw him pause for a while. My hope that he would finally wake up from whatever that's running in his mind, leaps up to me again.

But he steps forth again until I cannot contain seeing him walking away from me so I closed my eyes-and let those unending tears speak my pain out.

I am left all alone.

Physical pain really doesn't equate an emotional pain.

They say your father is your biggest supporter. Your number one protector.

Someone who can give you strength when you are weak.

But the person walking down the stairs has taught me to gather my own strength-for he failed to give me his.

I watched how he proudly smiled, laughed, and shake hands with people who seem to look up to him, follow him, and despise him.

Remembering that night, after he left me begging for a fatherly love, even just a bit of it, I beg to differ from these people.

All I can say is I am utterly disgusted at him. And I am never gonna look up to him, ever again. He does not deserve any bit of appreciation from me.

He made me see life differently. And it made it very petty.

"Good evening Ms. Aesha, what a nice evening it is, isn't it? " German who seemed to enjoy the evening stood beside me.

I only looked at him for a second before turning back my eyes again at the man. Watching his every move, plotting on how to make that smile of him fade.

In my peripheral view, I saw German stare at the man too, then play with his wine. We both watched him for a while. Though I know we are both watching him with different opinions flowing on our minds.

But of course, the German I know would not last my silence so he speak up.

"Your father seemed to enjoy the evening with all the guests that he is meeting. He has been successful leading. Making connections with people."

Connections.

He is good at making connections?

I laughed shortly. What a funny joke.

Sure he knows to build connections to these people.

But he sucks building a connection with the person who badly needs to connect with him the most.

All these connections, they are all fucking useless.

"Father." I echoed the word, now playing with the wine in my glass.

My mind traveled back, looking for how he is a father to me. How he is supposed to be a father to a family.

I fail to remember when he became one.

For he was long gone.

It felt so long that I can't even remember. I looked at the man one last time and it seemed like it is now his turn to have his welcome greetings as he offered his widest smile on the crowd this evening.

What a warm man. I mocked.

"I do not have a father," I said, spitting the last word with pure disgust.

I turned my back with all those blinding lights surrounding him. I decided to walk away from him. To turn my back on him again.

I caught German nod, acknowledging my words, but still keeping his gaze on the man.

"Take care," he bid as I take my first step, drowned by lots of following steps.

I can see eyes looking at me right now, but what I only decided to look at is the door to exit this location. Like all of this is insignificant aside from that door who can remove me from this hell-hot hole.

I've placed the wine glass on the table near the door and proceeded to remove myself from the event.

I was welcomed by the darkness outside, lighted by those bright lights from the parking lot. Vehicles are properly parked in the lot and I believe there are a lot of them right now.

He sure knows how to bring a show. And it seemed like they are addicted.

I walked past the parking lot and proceed to go to the passage with little lights as my guide to another small gate. I opened it with my keys and saw my motorcycle, lighted by another small light that has been standing there for years.

I climb over it, kicked it with my heels on. My dress rise at my movement and I felt the cold metal pressing on my skin as I move to remove the motorcycle stand.

Some loud roaring of the engine to somehow ruin his precious event.

I let it roar until I'm satisfied.

I sped my way out the small gate and passed all those cars in the lot.

I noticed how the front door became busy. Now it is full of people who are curious about who the culprit is-destroying the show.

I look up the glass window and saw the man watching me.

I am guessing how he is now feeling about me ruining his precious evening once again.

Before I get out of the gate, I saw German on the side mirror, watching me go.

I drove all the way up and shoved all the feeling he and the mansion made me feel.

How unfair.