A Wounded Heart

🌺 Viviane 🌺

🌺 Five Years Before 🌺

"Come on, Vivi! Choose this outfit right away."

"I already chose. I like the blue shirt with the khaki shorts."

"But I do not like it. Select another. Please don't let me down, go. Tell me another one that would be nice" João Pedro insisted stubbornly, looking at me with both hands on his hips.

I looked at João Pedro and gave up trying to argue with him. When he wanted something, he insisted until he got it, and I didn't have the patience to debate the same question for several minutes... or hours, days..., but João Pedro did, so I decided to select another combination of clothes.

"I liked that white shirt with the blue shorts."

"I also really liked this combination. You are the best friend I could ever have."

I looked at him and stopped myself. There was no point in disagreeing with João Pedro. He knew how to be annoying and pushy.

"You're annoying, but also the best friend I could ever have."

He came to meet me, and we hugged tight.

We were in his room, in the mansion where he lived with his parents, Mr. Rodolfo and Mrs. Marta Mendes de Albuquerque, as well as his brother, João Felipe.

I was the daughter of a couple of employees at the mansion, the driver Antônio and the cook Lucía, who had already worked for the family for over 30 years, since JP's grandparents, who were Mr. Rodolfo's parents, were still alive and for this reason, we had a house within the enormous property, in which I lived with my parents.

I grew up with the two brothers, and we studied together at the same school, as Mr. Rodolfo always insisted on paying for my studies and insisted that I should have the same as his two children.

I was the same age as JP, just a few months apart, and I think that's why we were such good friends. Unlike his brother, who always kept his distance from me, even when we were kids.

It was December and as the school year had ended, JP had been invited to a pool party at the house of one of Felipe's closest friends, Ricardo Alcântara. As always happened, JP wanted to take me with him, and we were now in his closet, where he wanted me to choose the clothes he was going to wear to that little party.

As always, when it came to JP, he had already decided which outfit he was going to wear and just wanted someone to confirm that it was a good choice.

I didn't understand fashion as much as he did, even though I'd lived all my life among the children of wealthy families since I'd studied with them since I was a little girl. I continued to be a person of limited financial conditions and who did not have the same luxuries as the bosses' children.

My mother didn't accept all the gifts Mr. Rodolfo wanted to give me, only my studies were carried out willingly and even though I was still very young, I understood her, because even though I was among the rich, I didn't feel like one of them. I couldn't, because many wouldn't let me forget that fact.

Unlike JP, who treated me like a sister, his brother was one of the ones who always made sure to point out the differences between us and I should hate him for that. Which unfortunately was not the reality.

"Aren't you going to get ready? We're going to be late," complained João Pedro.

"I don't understand why you're worried when you love being late to places, all to make an entrance that catches everyone's attention," I said, smiling.

"You are right. But today I want to enjoy every moment of this party. I just want to see Alicia's face, knowing João Felipe is going to New York, and she won't see him soon."

He burst out laughing, and I couldn't understand what was funny in this story. I decided not to think about JP's antics at the moment. He loved to gossip and make fun of the girls who mistreated me at school, and I preferred to refrain from talking about them, even if it was to say bad things.

While JP finished getting ready, I left the room and walked towards my house, still deciding whether to go to that party, which would be full of nasty people, who never treated me well, always making a point of excluding me from their conversations and making me understand what they considered "my place".

At the same time, I had a reason that made me want to go, even in the face of all that, which was João Felipe being there, on what he called his farewell to the country because he was going to travel to the United States the next day and I wouldn't have the opportunity to see him again before his trip if I didn't go to that party.

As much as I wasn't going to be by his side during the party, I could still be looking at him from afar and that would be enough for me, considering that he would spend years living in New York, where he intended to study and make their specializations in the financial market.

I was passing through the corridor, which is close to the living room when I realized that Ricardo Alcântara and João Felipe were talking, and since they weren't speaking in a low voice. They were talking about me, and I could hear clearly.

I was scared, afraid that they would see me, but I couldn't control myself, and I stopped to listen better to what they were saying, it only confirmed a fact that I had known for a long time: I was not welcome among them.

I couldn't bear to listen any longer, so I quietly retreated down the corridor. Tears welled up in my eyes, and my heart ached with the realization that no matter how much I loved João Felipe, I would always be an outsider in his world.

Viviane

I entered the mansion where my parents had worked for over thirty-five years. Everything was silent, which was quite normal for a Saturday, considering that it was already night and that the employees had already retired to the wing designated for them inside the house.

Like every Sunday, Mr. Rodolfo, who was my parents' boss, gave most of them time off, some must have even gone to their respective homes.

João Pedro had sent me a message earlier, calling me to go to his room. It was normal, but I avoided meeting my best friend's mother and so consequently I avoided entering the mansion.

Mrs. Marta didn't like me and despite never having mistreated me, I knew she didn't agree with my friendship with her youngest son, because she didn't disguise her displeasure at seeing me always by João Pedro's side.

When I was a child, who didn't understand people's actions and their motivations, I kept insisting on staying with Felipe, I considered him my friend. And so, it went until one day I overheard a conversation between him and his school friends, arranging a little pool party at Ricardo Alcântara's house, who was an inseparable friend of his.

Ricardo asked him not to take me to that party. The words I heard that day left a deep impression on me and made me understand my place in the lives of those I considered equal to me, until that moment.

"It's going to be the best pool party you've ever been to! Everyone will be there," said Henrique Alcântara, who was Ricardo's cousin and a friend of João Felipe.

"But you can't take the employee's daughter, do you hear João Felipe? And if João Pedro insists, I withdraw the invitation I made to him. That girl doesn't belong to the same social milieu as us. We shouldn't mix with her" Ricardo said.

"You don't even have to worry, Ricardo! It never crossed my mind to take that girl to this party! I'm going with Alicia, and she hates Vivi" replied João Felipe with disgust.

Hearing the way, they talked about me left me floored! I couldn't even hear the rest of the conversation, as I sneaked out in the other direction they were, so they wouldn't see me, and my humiliation would be even greater.

I was so sad that I didn't want to go to class for a few days. The disappointment was such that I even had a fever and was in bed. I was then sixteen and João Felipe was nineteen. He was three years older than his brother, João Pedro.

After that, I did everything to distance myself from the children of my parents' bosses and tried to make new friends, with students who were closer to my economic reality, such as those students who were on scholarships.

Despite my attempts to distance myself, João Pedro never accepted the distance I tried to put between us, and even with all his mother's nagging and his other friends insisting that he shouldn't take me everywhere, because I wasn't part of their social circle, we were best friends until today.

We even opted for the same college, just different courses, as he was studying business while I had chosen social work, and we continued to consider each other as brothers.

I get to João Pedro's room, and I'm already turning the doorknob, without even knocking. We had that level of intimacy.

He was lying on his bed, watching TV. His room was huge, with a King Size bed right in the center, and it was all decorated in shades of gray and navy blue. Everything was very masculine, and I liked João Pedro's style, which despite all the luxury and richness, was not futile nor did it get carried away by appearances.

"At last, you're here," he said, glaring at me and getting up from the bed.

"Don't give me complaints! You know I hate coming into the mansion here. I still come out of friendship with you, your ungrateful bastard," I said exasperated but smiling internally. "What happened? Why all this drama?"

"Only, I'm bored indoors and want to go out and have fun. Saturday night is not the day to stay at home watching TV, much less a guy like me, hot and fun" he said with a big smile on his face. "And I already told you that you can come here whenever you want! You are completely free to do so. My father always guaranteed you access to everything we have, you who live full of pride."

"But you're adamant, João Pedro! You made me come all this way just to say that? Why didn't you say it via message? We could have arranged everything without me coming here!" I complained, but I was smiling.

I like going out with João Pedro, we have a lot of fun.

"And about coming here, your Rodolfo is a special person and I like him, but your mother can't stand me, and I don't like it when she gives me a dirty look."

"I asked you to come here because I want you to help me choose a look that enhances all my beauty. And about Mrs. Marta, you know that my father knows how to deal with her very well."

I looked at him and I just believed that the matter he considered urgent was the choice of his clothes, because it was about my friend.

The years passed, but it seems that everything remained the same. There was no point in telling him that I wasn't good at the subject because João Pedro said that I was a woman and knew what women liked.

"So, let's go. Because it's already past twenty o'clock and I don't like to go out late..."

We chose João Pedro's clothes, and we were still finishing watching the series he was watching when I arrived. We were fans and were always watching reruns of episodes from that show.

When I realized that more than an hour had passed, I hurriedly left his room and went back to my house, ready to get ready.

We arrived at the club already after twenty-three hours. It was amazing how João Pedro took so long to get ready, much longer than I did.

But thinking about it, I didn't have as many clothing options as João Pedro, to take so much time selecting. He sometimes even complained and insisted on wanting to buy me clothes, but I wouldn't accept them. Everything his father did for me was enough.

Now Mr. Rodolfo doesn't have to pay for my studies anymore. I managed to get into a public university. But there are always costs, and the way he found to continue helping me was to give me a savings account on my eighteenth birthday.

The fact is that I didn't feel good about refusing, because that help would be very welcome for the following years, during college.

We had arranged to meet some friends inside the club, and it was with some difficulty that we managed to locate them, as it was very crowded, but nothing out of the ordinary for a Saturday night.

We had arranged to go out with our usual group of friends, which were Cecília, César, and Júlia.

"You took your time!" he immediately complained to Cecília.

She was studying business with João Pedro, an extremely beautiful woman, with her body well shaped by constant physical exercises, as she was "addicted to the gym", in her own words. They had known each other since their first semester in college, and we became good friends.

Cecilia works as a photographic model and besides being beautiful, with her long curly, natural blonde hair and beautiful clear eyes, in a shade of blue that stands out on her face, my friend is also very intelligent.

"Oh, friend. The complaint here is with JP. He's the biggest culprit for our delay" I spoke loudly, trying to make myself heard above the noise of the sound and the surrounding conversations.

"Normal! JP is always full of frills," complained César.

César has been our friend for many years, as he had studied with us throughout school, in the same room as us, and we only separated when we opted for different universities. He was finishing his law course at another institution, and he was a very handsome brunette, a little shorter than João Pedro, who was over 1.85 tall.

"I agree with you, César! I don't know why it took so long to choose an outfit," I said, looking up. "I always wear the first outfit that appears in front of me."

"Guys, today you are more boring than usual. Let's drink because the night is young," João Pedro said while looking attentively at the other side of the club.

"That's right, JP. Let's stop stalling and let's drink," Julia shouted, looking quite excited already.

Júlia was a recent friendship, as we met her through Cecília a year ago, and since then she has always been with us. They were childhood friends when they still lived in a city in the interior of the state and had started to share an apartment in the city since Júlia came to study in São Paulo.

Short, very pretty, and extroverted, Júlia always manages to make friends very easily. She has long black hair and very expressive light brown eyes. A girl's love is always good in life.

"I agree with you, Julia. Let's drink and forget about these boring people" João Pedro said after he stopped looking at whatever it was on the other side of the club, near the bar. And that's what happened.

The atmosphere remained relaxed while we had fun with friends, as we were all used to each other's personalities.

🌺 Viviane 🌺

I wasn't drinking, because whenever I went out with João Pedro, we took turns driving. Today he could drink as much as he wanted, and I would drive.

I don't have a car, and despite Mr. Rodolfo's insistence on wanting to present me with a vehicle, I could never accept such an expensive gift, and he knew that very well. My parents agreed with me, and I lived off the rides JP gave me, and today we had his car.

My friend had been there at the bar for some time, talking to a guy I didn't recognize, and I thought then that I had already made a new friend, something that always happened. I decided to go to the bathroom and looked at the watch on my wrist to see what time it was. It was after two in the morning, which was my maximum time, and I was going to call João Pedro to leave as soon as I returned from the bathroom.

I called Cecília and Julia, and together we went to the bathroom, which had a huge line to enter. As my friends were each focused on their cell phones, I believe checking messages or social networks, I was then looking around, analyzing the environment.

It was a place we always went to because it was quiet in terms of security and well-attended. Along the hall, many couples were hugging and kissing, some already quite daring I should say.

When I looked closer, I recognized one of the guys who was making out with a woman, who looked very beautiful, from what I could see of her body, because she was dressed in a very short skirt and an even smaller blouse, which barely covered her large breasts.

I was in shock when I recognized the guy, as he was none other than João Felipe, João Pedro's brother.

But how could it? He was in the US! I saw João Pedro in a video call with his brother yesterday. And I heard Felipe say he didn't know when he was coming home yet.

It's been five years since he was living and studying outside Brazil. He had taken several courses since then and only came home every six months. And when that happened, I hardly had any contact with him, as I always did my best not to meet him during his visits.

When he lived in Brazil, I easily avoided him, as our interaction was based on polite greetings when, by chance, we met in the halls of the mansion or school.

"Friend, it's our turn!" Said Julia, pulling me into the bathroom and taking me out of the trance I was in.

Inside, with the scene still engraved in my mind, we each entered one of the reserved rooms and after checking our appearance in the mirror, touching up our lipstick, and fixing our hair, we left the bathroom. This time I avoided looking at where I already knew João Felipe was.

I didn't feel good when I was in his presence, because I didn't like the coldness with which he treated me and avoided putting me in that kind of situation.

I went straight to the bar counter, where João Pedro was, and I approached him saying:

"Can we go? I'm tired and sleepy," I said, already pulling him to get up from the chair. I didn't want to run the risk of Felipe coming to where we were and having to have any dialogue with him.

"Clear! Yes, we can," he said, smiling fondly at me, but he didn't get up from where he was.

"Your girlfriend, João?"

The little guy who was talking to him asked, with a slightly angry expression. Something I found quite odd.

"No! Not at all" João Pedro answered quickly. "This is Vivi, my friend since we used disposable diapers. I already told you about her" João Pedro explained.

The explanation seemed to relax the atmosphere, which had become a little tense, I couldn't explain why, and the man ended up laughing at João Pedro's words.

I kept looking at JP, waiting for him to introduce his friend when I realized that they hadn't met there at the club, as I had first assumed.

" Vivi, this is Jack. He is Brazilian but has lived and worked in New York for some years now. We are arranging our next meeting there in the city that never sleeps."

" Nice to meet you, Jack. Too bad we're already leaving," I said politely, but without really paying attention.

I was quite anxious to leave and right after greeting Jack, we said goodbye to JP's friend and headed toward the table where the rest of the class was. The girls had returned to our table when we left the bathroom, while I was looking for João Pedro.

"You always leave so soon!" Complained Júlia, who was even more excited than she normally was, when we informed her that we were going to leave.

"Early only if it's for you, Julia!" I replied smiling.

Julia always wanted to stay until the last song, and I could never keep up with her. Despite that, she always ended up accompanying me when she realized that João Pedro didn't want to go yet and that I didn't want to stay at the club. On those occasions, I ended up sleeping in the apartment she shared with Cecília.

"But Julia is right. You are always the last to arrive and the first to leave," Cesar agreed, looking at us with a malicious smile.

He had already had several drinks and seemed unaffected, for as usual, he was quite resistant to booze.

"I know that I am someone special and that you always want to be close to me, my loves. But our time to leave has come, and we are leaving. I plan to enjoy a walk on the beach tomorrow," said João Pedro in a farewell tone.

They would still be at the club, and that was good for them. What I wanted was my bed to rest on and, above all, I didn't want to run the risk of bumping into João Felipe again.

We were about to leave through the club door and when I thought I would manage to avoid having to face the return of the arrogant Felipe today, he approached us, calling for his brother.

"Hey, João Pedro!" He said, pulling his brother into a hug.

"Brother, what a surprise! What are you doing here? When did it arrive?"

João Pedro hugged him back, apparently surprised and delighted to see his brother's mess. I then confirmed that João Pedro also did not know about his return.

"I got home it was around 8 pm, and I went straight to my room to get some sleep. Not even our parents knew I arrived because they had left and as I saw that you were in your room with your "friend", I thought it's best to leave it to greet you at another time" he explained mockingly when saying the word "friend", "When I woke up, I felt invigorated and thought I'd come and enjoy the nightlife in São Paulo. I missed home and the Brazilians."

"Our parents went to one of those fundraisers they love so much," JP informed his brother. "But you should have gone to my room, I was very bored."

"And I'm on medicine for boredom?" João Felipe spoke, arching his eyebrow. "I see you're already leaving. Why so early?"

He could only be being ironic, as it was past two in the morning. It wasn't early at all! I then started to walk slowly toward the exit. It seemed he had gotten even worse, for this time he didn't even deign to compliment me.

João Pedro saw my distance and called me

"Vivi, wait! Aren't you going to talk to João Felipe?" She questioned me with a face of confusion.

He knew damn well we didn't get along, me and his idiot brother. It seemed like he was doing it to piss me off, but I knew he was just trying to smooth things over between us, as usual.

" Where is your education, my brother? Won't you talk to our childhood friend?"

He could only be messing with my face! Or more likely, drunk, to force this interaction between me and the brother.

" Hello, Viviane. How have you been? " Said Joao Felipe, with a cynical expression on his face.

"I'm fine, thanks for asking," I replied dryly. " In case you change your mind about leaving, I can call an Uber service, " I threatened, looking firmly at João Pedro."

"Let's go then," he growled, following me when I started walking again. " Tomorrow we will catch up on matters. Enjoy the ballad, Felipe, since I'm leaving," he said, addressing his brother.

João Felipe just waved and turned around, going back to the part where the dance floor was, towards the bar.

" I can't understand why you can't stand each other! We all grew up together! " João Pedro complained when we got in the car, he was in the passenger seat, and I was at the wheel.

" I'm going to start driving, and you know, I'm always a little nervous behind the wheel. So, I think it's best to close this matter."

" All good! Once again, I give up trying to understand you two" João Pedro said, laying his head on the back of the bench and closing his eyes. I think he had a lot to drink.