Chapter 1 DEAR DEATH

Death has a stench, and one that isn't very sweet smelling. It has a smell of hopelessness and despair, I would know, I've tasted it more than thrice in the last decade. My parent had died in an auto crash years ago and although I couldn't say I was still grieving, I still felt their presence once in a while. I was not ready for my grandfather to pass on too. No, I was not.

And it hit so hard, standing over his coffin that I could feel fresh tears bubble to the surface, threatening to spill and I held it in, I had to be strong, the whole paparazzi of Florida was right there, waiting for the cameras to flash on any moment of weakness, I was not willing to give them that.

"Avery, the pastor wants to speak with us," my elder sister, Sasha said as she came beside me by the grave side, it was then that I notice that the crowd had dispersed and I was left standing there alone with the eager camera men.

"I don't think I want to speak with anyone, Sasha " I replied, indeed I was not in the mood to hear any seemingly encouraging words from a man of God about my grand father being in a better place, I knew he would be, he was one of the few good people in the whole world, if he didn't make it to a good place then I could swear no one would.

"Cut the drama, Avery, the whole family is waiting." Sasha said stiffly and turned around to go back into the duplex.

I almost chuckled at the word, "family". There was no family, it was just me and her and a bunch of greying old men who thought because we were women that we could easy sway and play to their tunes, well Sasha was the prim and proper child, I wasn't, never had been and least of all on days like this, when I was missing the warmth of the last semblance of a guardian, I was not in the mood to be diplomatic.

But then, it was either that or stand with the annoying camera men who were eager like kids awaiting candy.

Pulling the sunglasses down from my forehead where it perched, I signaled the security who stood a few feet away.

"I don't want them here when I come, make sure they're gone or you'll be gone," I stated and then moved into the building, I didn't have a choice, I wanted the funeral to be as peaceful as it could, he deserved that respect.

The building was tastefully decorated, white linen hung everywhere, a large and handsome photograph of my grandfather hung on the wall, he had on a wide smile, the infectious sort that never failed for make me smile back.

Sasha was standing by the mantle, her hands in the firm grip of an elderly woman I did not know, she was all teary and I almost rolled my eyes. Everyone was pretending to be sad just to make us feel better. They didn't have to, it was our loss and we could handle it.

"Oh, you must be Avery, Sasha said you schooled away from here, I guess that's why I haven't seen a lot of you," the woman said and beamed at me, I smiled back, hoping it was not a sneer.

"I've been away, I spent most of my holidays and vacations here in Florida with Pa Harry." I replied and touched her old wrinkled hands as she held onto me.

With one last look around the room, I as already feeling suffocated and ready to head outside and into my Bentley go drive off, my Bentley, the last gift Pa Harry had given to me the past summer. Somehow getting on the leather seat awoke memories, in a less than three weeks, it had become my favorite car, somehow, I felt a sense of closeness to my late Grand father once I was behind the wheel.

"There are people here to speak with us," Sasha said as the elderly woman moved away.

"Oh please, can I quit acting like a doll? You know if rather be anywhere than here." I stated, factually and exhaled.

"You took a clean two weeks off work, Avery, where would you rather be?" She asked with a scolding tone.

"Does it matter? I just need to be away from here," I replied and looked outside, truly, the security was more or less dragging the paparazzi out of the compound.

"Could you please just dedicate the next two hours to Pa Harry? He deserves that much," she said, mirroring my exact thoughts. I stared at her, she was wrong, the moment he was put in the ground, it was no longer about him, all this was for looks and I wasn't ready to play host.

"Sasha, I know you keep telling me how I need to look good for everyone, I can't do that right now, not today, I can't play perfect princess," I argued, itching the leave the whole place.

"I'm not asking you to play princess, frankly no body is, all I'm saying is that an hour more of mixing won't hurt, Pa Harry is gone, all these people came here to pay their last respects, the least you can do is appreciate them," She said, and she was making sense, but then, we both knew it wasn't exactly the truth.

"Between me and you, these men are here to form ties and try to milk what they can out of us while his corpse is still warm, I'm not ready to play stupid like I don't know what they want." I retorted.

"Does it matter? We can't exactly cut open their hearts and see, courtesy demands we act nice, that's all, you'll be fine within the hour, it's rude to leave before your guest Avery, I'm sure mum taught us that." She said.

A low blow, yes but then it was not unlike her, I wasn't really living by her books and that always made me the wild one.

"There's something I need to tell you, Sasha," I began, there was no point trying to drag it forward, there was no way to butter it up.

"Can this wait? Please, we have forever to talk, can we see to our guests first?" She asked, clearly frustrated.

"No, Sasha, it can not wait, you no why? I don't care about our guests, the same way none of them truly cared about Pa Harry, he was a powerful man and half his friends were sycophants and disloyal pricks. I don't care what they think of me, I can assure you the feeling is mutual. I bought a ticket." I blurted, better now than later.

Sasha looked at me like my head was not seated correctly on my neck, it was not a new look.

"With everything that has happened, I need a fresh start I'm heading to New Orleans, I've booked a flight, it's due in less than an hour" I stated.

"What? You're moving?" She asked, her voice high and doubtful.

Maybe it was the best time for us to stick with each other, but no, I had a different plan, to be alone.