Marcus sat comfortably on our large dining table, eating like nothing was wrong. Like he hadn't just shattered me. He shoveled in the food I'd spent hours cooking standing, sweating and forcing myself through the pain while I lay here with an empty stomach.
He said starving me was one of the ways to make me lose weight.
And I didn't complain infact I never did.
My whole life had revolved around me trying to please him, respect and love him the right way a wife should. But no matter what I did, it never seems to be enough because his cold blue eyes, never left or stopped glaring at me with open disgust every now and then.
Those eyes.
I swallowed the huge lump that had formed in my throat as I adjusted my posture slightly. Yes those eyes, I could still remember when those same eyes had once looked at me like I was the only woman in the world.
That was years ago before the childbirth tragedy. When everything was still normal back when I was still a damsel with soft curves in the right places curves that turned heads, curves that made Marcus proud to hold my hand in public.
I caught my reflection in one of the pots lining the wall and another quiet sob escaped my lips.
The woman staring back at me didn't feel real at all. Puffy, chubby cheeks. Red, hollow eyes and a swollen body which weigh over a hundred pounds heavier than I used to be.
God... how did I become like this?
It started two years ago when I gave birth to our son, Tristan.
My Tristan.
May God rest his soul.
Complications during his birth had damaged parts of my body and my hormones went wild in the process making me add weight.
The weight had came suddenly, settling in all the wrong places before I knew it until my once-perfect figure became shapeless.
The doctors said exercise would help.
But how do you exercise when your heart is buried with your child?
After Tristan died, I wasn't myself anymore. Depression wrapped around me like chains. I barely had the strength to get out of bed, let alone work on my body and even with all that the weight never left.
Marcus had hated it from the beginning. Even before Tristan died, he frowned at my new shape always complaining that I no longer look attractive to him anymore that he had began to find it difficult to show me off in public. That was when he first started pulling away. Turning his back on me his back on me like I was nothing but I didn't mind then because I had Tristan.
But after he died...
I didn't know how to survive anymore.
"And what the f**k are you sitting down there idly for?!"
His voice thundered across the room again, tearing through my thoughts.
"Don't you have work to do?!"
I flinched violently, my body jerking in shock.
"I-I'm sorry... I was just-" My voice trembled, words tangling together before trailing off uselessly because I didn't know what to say. I never did.
"Of course you're sorry," he hissed yet again the sound was sharp and venomous. I lowered my head immediately staring at the floor as I was unable to look at him.
"You're always sorry. F**king pathetic. Is there ever a time you don't apologize for every little thing?"
"Mar... Marcus," I whimpered. Tears streamed freely now, blurring my vision. Although this wasn't the first time he abused me with words but no matter how many times he did, it never hurt less and I'd be lying if I say I'd gotten used to it because this was the same man I'd given up my future for, who had once loved me dearly in return and If someone had told me our marriage would end like this, I would have laughed in disbelief.
"Marcus, I-"
"Don't you f**king dare call my name!"
He slammed his fist against the table so hard the plates rattled. I nearly jumped out of my skin, biting down hard on my lip as I bowed my head even lower.
"You hear me? You're not permitted to call my name. It sounds disgusting coming out of your mouth. Now get your fat, ugly ass out of my sight this minute before I do something you'll regret."
He didn't have to say the words for a second time before I knew he wasn't bluffing the mad, enraged look in his eyes said it all.
I scrambled to my feet immediately, my movements clumsy and unbalanced by my weight and as a result, my foot accidentally slammed into the wall sending a sharp jolt of pain exploding through my toe like wildfire.
I screamed immediately, clutching my foot as agony tore through me.
Marcus didn't even look at me the entire time he just kept eating pretending and acting as if he wasn't there.
My heart shattered all over again. How could someone be so cruel?
With agonizing slowness, I limped toward our bedroom. Every step sent waves of pain through my body and I sobbed harder.
I reached the room and collapsed onto the bed with a painful groan. The mattress dipped under my weight, but I barely noticed.
I opened the bedside drawer, pulled out the healing balm, and applied it to my broken toenail, which was still bleeding.
The menthol burned instantly as it came in contact with the skin I screamed, my fingers digging into the sheets as the sting intensified, tears soaking the pillow. When it finally dulled, I stood up, preparing to leave-
But then the sound of a ringing phone suddenly sliced through the air.
I froze immediately and halted on my track. Turning around, I saw it was Marcus's phone that was lying on the bed.
My breath hitched as I rushed up to pick it up, ready to go give it to him, but then my eyes caught the caller ID, and the name I saw literally punched the breath out of my lungs.
My Missing Rib?
My eyes dimmed immediately alongside the screen as the call ended, my brain trying to process it.
Who could this be?
His mom?
No, she was dead; there was no way this could be her. My chest lightened slightly as the thought of her suddenly crossed my mind.
That woman, she was such a sweet and nice person; she'd practically loved me more than anything, more than I had seen any woman love her daughter-in-law.
She was the main driving force of I and Marcus's wedding, always ready to give her support, and at some point I'd felt like her own daughter. That was before the cold hands of death snatched her away from us too.
My throat tightened. If that woman were alive, she would never watch me suffer under her son's hands like this, and there was no way I'd have gone through the grief of Tristan's death alone because she'd have comforted me...
Before I could stop it, a lone tear rolled down. I didn't know what I did to deserve it and why the people I love and who care about me were always being taken away from me.
Just at that minute the phone started ringing again, cutting through my reverie. I jerked slightly and looked down, only to see it was the same person calling. I moved to go give it to him this time, curious to get the answer from him.
But as I did, one of my tears suddenly fell directly on the phone screen. My eyes widened immediately as I quickly tried to wipe it off, my heart lurching in panic. God forbid I give Marcus another reason to scream at me. He was always one to pick offense with everything I did.
But then my finger slipped.
The tear had landed right on the green button, and in my haste I accidentally answered the call.
I froze immediately, my heart racing.
The last time I mistakenly answered one of his calls... I almost followed his mother to the afterlife.
My breath turned ragged with panic, but before I could think of what to do,
"Hello, baby..." A woman's voice suddenly chimed from the other end of the line, breathy with excitement. "I just did the scan. It's a baby girl and-"
"How dare you f**king pick up my call?" I was still listening when the phone was suddenly snatched from me from behind, and the next thing I knew, I saw stars as a thunderous slap landed hard against my cheeks.